New QAF Fic - Pairing Melanie/Lindsay
I've tried something different. I did some research for my novel today and stumbled across JONAH, Jews Offering New Alternatives to Homosexuality. I just had to write a Mel/Linds fic after reading an interview on that site with a psychotherapist who claims that lesbianism is a disease and she can heal it.
FEMININE
Queer as Folk, Melanie/Lindsay, PG.
I disclaim all rights on these characters.
Spoilers through all five seasons, telling major events.
Melanie stumbles across the website JONAH and her thoughts are going wild. So what really is feminine?
Melanie sat in front of the computer, starting at the screen, only her eyes moving hastily. Her brow was furrowed and she had her hands clasped under her chin, her fingers covering her mouth.
“JONAH - Jews Offering New Alternatives to Homosexuality”
She looked intently at the text in front of her, every word sliding a new, sharper dagger through her heart.
“When a woman has rejected her own femininity, she pays a price. Because in seeking to unite with other women, she is trying to unite with herself, and this union will not, ultimately, heal the psyche.”.
Freak. Psycho. Nutscase.
Mel closed her eyes. She had heard them all before: The lame insults on the playground, in Elementary and High School, at University and even in court. At the mall, in the streets, in a museum, on a fucking plane. But they never stopped to sting. Make her twitch. Twist around her stomach. Only for the blink of a second she thought, well, I’m mentally ill, right?
That second always passed. Melanie was strong, and she believed deeply that she was anything but ill. Still, seeing what this Jewish organisation was writing on their website hit and hurt her. She opened her eyes again, continuing to read:
“A woman is drawn to other women because she seeks heart and soul connection. Perhaps she was never able to get it, because society expects her to be out working and providing for herself instead of puttering in her garden. She comes to recognise zest, color, vitality, creativity and soul that are really the essence of being feminine.”
Zest. Lindsay was zest. She was what made her life worth living.
Color. The rainbow was color, carrying everyone single one of them.
Vitality. JR and Gus were vitality. They were life, alive, everything her and Lindsay’s earth circled around.
Creativity. Lindsay was creativity. She was an artist, the person who re-designed everyone’s life, whose creativitiy inspired Mel again and again.
Soul. Melanie had a soul. Just like everybody else.
“Instead of looking for another woman, I’m trying to connect a woman with the feminine reservoir within herself. When a woman has been filled up by the feminine, she will find the nourishment she need within her own depths. Only when she has been nourished by that deep connection, can a woman move on to connect with the masculine.”
She couldn’t read any further. Her head was filled with images of Sam Auerbach… fucking her wife against a wall!
What if Lindsay had found that feminine reservoir inside her?
What if she could never make her happy?
…what if Linds would leave her?
The bomb.
Mel also remembered the bomb at Babylon. She remembered storming frantically from the car back to the entrance of the club, and all she could think about was that Lindsay was inside it, Lindsay could be dead, Linds, Linds, Linds!
Melanie smiled, even though it had been a dreadful night. Lindsay had come running towards her, tears of shock matching the ones in Mel’s eyes. She had shouted Melanie’s name all the while through, abandoning all rules of WASP and the country club.
They had fallen into each other’s arms as if there was no tomorrow.
Melanie relaxed. She and Lindsay were meant to be, she was sure of that, so it didn’t matter whatever more this fucked up psychologist would say:
“With another woman, a woman will have only the illusion of wholeness. The shadow, representing those real developmental needs that were never met, will continue to haunt her.”
“What are you reading?”
Suddenly Lindsay was standing behind her, bending over to look at the screen. Her hands came to rest on Melanie’s arms, stroking up and down casually, but gently.
“Just some sick homophobe bullshit put forwad by Jews who have forgotten their own history.”
Mel could practically see Lindsay’s brow furrowing.
“I cannot believe that people actually write something like that.”
Lindsay’s words were breathed against Mel’s cheek and she turned her head to kiss her wife’s lips gently. Her fingers found ‘alt’ and ‘F4’ on their own and she closed the window.
I can’t believe how can I actually let something like that get to me, Linds.
“Come to bed…”
Zest.
“…let’s show these assholes what we think of them!”
Color.
Lindsay’s tongue, sneaking inbetween her lips.
Vitality.
The light in Lindsay’s eyes.
Creativity.
“I love you, Linds.”
A gentle smile. Another kiss.
“I love you too.”
Soul.
All quotes from this article, only pronouns altered to put them into context.
It basically is an answer to the psychotherapist's theory. Loving kisses, 0corona0 to Ms. Eller-Boyko.
FEMININE
Queer as Folk, Melanie/Lindsay, PG.
I disclaim all rights on these characters.
Spoilers through all five seasons, telling major events.
Melanie stumbles across the website JONAH and her thoughts are going wild. So what really is feminine?
Melanie sat in front of the computer, starting at the screen, only her eyes moving hastily. Her brow was furrowed and she had her hands clasped under her chin, her fingers covering her mouth.
“JONAH - Jews Offering New Alternatives to Homosexuality”
She looked intently at the text in front of her, every word sliding a new, sharper dagger through her heart.
“When a woman has rejected her own femininity, she pays a price. Because in seeking to unite with other women, she is trying to unite with herself, and this union will not, ultimately, heal the psyche.”.
Freak. Psycho. Nutscase.
Mel closed her eyes. She had heard them all before: The lame insults on the playground, in Elementary and High School, at University and even in court. At the mall, in the streets, in a museum, on a fucking plane. But they never stopped to sting. Make her twitch. Twist around her stomach. Only for the blink of a second she thought, well, I’m mentally ill, right?
That second always passed. Melanie was strong, and she believed deeply that she was anything but ill. Still, seeing what this Jewish organisation was writing on their website hit and hurt her. She opened her eyes again, continuing to read:
“A woman is drawn to other women because she seeks heart and soul connection. Perhaps she was never able to get it, because society expects her to be out working and providing for herself instead of puttering in her garden. She comes to recognise zest, color, vitality, creativity and soul that are really the essence of being feminine.”
Zest. Lindsay was zest. She was what made her life worth living.
Color. The rainbow was color, carrying everyone single one of them.
Vitality. JR and Gus were vitality. They were life, alive, everything her and Lindsay’s earth circled around.
Creativity. Lindsay was creativity. She was an artist, the person who re-designed everyone’s life, whose creativitiy inspired Mel again and again.
Soul. Melanie had a soul. Just like everybody else.
“Instead of looking for another woman, I’m trying to connect a woman with the feminine reservoir within herself. When a woman has been filled up by the feminine, she will find the nourishment she need within her own depths. Only when she has been nourished by that deep connection, can a woman move on to connect with the masculine.”
She couldn’t read any further. Her head was filled with images of Sam Auerbach… fucking her wife against a wall!
What if Lindsay had found that feminine reservoir inside her?
What if she could never make her happy?
…what if Linds would leave her?
The bomb.
Mel also remembered the bomb at Babylon. She remembered storming frantically from the car back to the entrance of the club, and all she could think about was that Lindsay was inside it, Lindsay could be dead, Linds, Linds, Linds!
Melanie smiled, even though it had been a dreadful night. Lindsay had come running towards her, tears of shock matching the ones in Mel’s eyes. She had shouted Melanie’s name all the while through, abandoning all rules of WASP and the country club.
They had fallen into each other’s arms as if there was no tomorrow.
Melanie relaxed. She and Lindsay were meant to be, she was sure of that, so it didn’t matter whatever more this fucked up psychologist would say:
“With another woman, a woman will have only the illusion of wholeness. The shadow, representing those real developmental needs that were never met, will continue to haunt her.”
“What are you reading?”
Suddenly Lindsay was standing behind her, bending over to look at the screen. Her hands came to rest on Melanie’s arms, stroking up and down casually, but gently.
“Just some sick homophobe bullshit put forwad by Jews who have forgotten their own history.”
Mel could practically see Lindsay’s brow furrowing.
“I cannot believe that people actually write something like that.”
Lindsay’s words were breathed against Mel’s cheek and she turned her head to kiss her wife’s lips gently. Her fingers found ‘alt’ and ‘F4’ on their own and she closed the window.
I can’t believe how can I actually let something like that get to me, Linds.
“Come to bed…”
Zest.
“…let’s show these assholes what we think of them!”
Color.
Lindsay’s tongue, sneaking inbetween her lips.
Vitality.
The light in Lindsay’s eyes.
Creativity.
“I love you, Linds.”
A gentle smile. Another kiss.
“I love you too.”
Soul.
All quotes from this article, only pronouns altered to put them into context.
It basically is an answer to the psychotherapist's theory. Loving kisses, 0corona0 to Ms. Eller-Boyko.