SGA Fic: Taking Responsibility
Title: Taking Responsibility
Author: 1000traenen
Summary: It’s a lover’s spat for Lorne and McKay. And Sheppard gets involved in a surprising way.
Pairing: McKay/Lorne
Rating: FRT
Categories: Hurt/Comfort
Prompt: #10- Fight
Disclaimer: Since you don’t see stuff like this on TV, suffice it to say that they aren’t mine. The quoted song lyrics belong to Chris Carrabba of Dashboard Confessional.
Spoilers: none.
A/N: for the 10_hurt_comfort comm. Link to my table. Not beta’d, so all mistakes are mine.
---
And you held her looser than you would have if you ever could have known
Some things tie your life together, slender threads and things to treasure'>
She said, "no one is alone the way you are alone"
And you held her looser than you would have if you ever could have known
Some things tie your life together, slender threads and things to treasure
-Dashboard Confessional “Dusk & Summer”
---
“Ya know, Rodney, this is why you’re so alone,” Evan said as he paused by the door, then he left without looking back.
Even if the Atlantis doors could slam, this one wouldn’t have. Rodney was the angry one, but Evan was the one who walked out of the room. And while Rodney stayed in his quarters with an open mouth but otherwise unmoving, Evan walked along the halls with his head down. Evan’s first stop was the thankfully sparse mess hall where he made a cup of coffee. And instead of going to where he could easily be found, Evan made his way to John Sheppard’s office for two reasons. One- he could distract himself with paperwork since there was enough to last both the CO and XO for a week straight. Two- It was Sheppard’s office, there was no reason for most anyone to look for him there.
Evan shrugged off his coat, draping across the seat of the small sofa while he sat in his usual chair (across from Sheppard’s), grabbed one of the many pens scattered around the office, and opened the first folder he got his hands on. With a pen in one hand and a cup of coffee in the other, Evan forced himself to focus on what was right in front of him.
Setting a file aside (he’d lost count after two, he didn’t really care how many he got done), he opened another file. But instead of reading the words, he realized that he should feel bad for walking out before the argument was resolved. But there were only so many insults he could take, and it didn’t take long for Evan to reach his limit. That hurt trumped whatever guilt he may have been harboring. Taking the last sip of coffee left in his cup, he shook his head and went back to the paperwork. He could do this for another hour before he should try to get some rest for his mission the following day.
He didn’t get far into that file when he noticed someone standing in the doorway. Evan raised his eyes slowly, and it took getting to the person’s shirt for him to figure out that Rodney hadn’t found him, if he was even looking. But Evan didn’t feel a sense of relief since the crossed arms and narrowed eyes in the doorway belonged to Lt. Col. John Sheppard. Sheppard, who was Evan’s CO and more importantly Rodney’s teammate. Evan put the pen down and sighed. He was so screwed.
“Sir,” Evan said, standing up.
“You have a mission tomorrow, right?” John asked, coming into the office.
“Yes, sir. Mission brief at 0730 and departure at 0830,” Evan rattled off.
“Then what the Hell are you doing here?” John asked with a sigh for emphasis.
“Unwinding, sir.”
“Unwinding?” John repeated, with Evan only meekly nodding. “Nobody unwinds with paperwork. What’s going on?”
“Rodney and I got into a fight. Figured I was safe here if he went looking for me. I’m just out of patience right now.”
John nodded, then went around the desk to sit in his chair. “What happened? The last I saw Rodney was he was in the lab, obsessing over something that went…”
And then John’s hand went over his head in dramatization. Evan nodded and took a deep breath, and answered John as he stared at the desk.
“Ya know, I don’t even remember how it started. I just know we were in his quarters, talking about another team’s mission…next thing I know, he’s screaming at me. It’s just…I’m used to him. I’m used to him ranting and raving and every so often using me as a verbal punching bag because he can’t yell at someone else and he’s got to get it out of his system. I guess I just didn’t want to listen to it anymore tonight.”
John nodded, having known Rodney for quite some time. “He doesn’t mean anything by it.”
“I know. It’s just…he says things. I know he doesn’t mean them personally…to me. But he still says them…” Evan quietly admitted.
John leaned back in his chair, then rubbed his hands over his face for a second. “I’ve heard about his verbal lashings from some of the other scientists,” John said a minute later. “I just never realized he’d do the same to you when you didn’t deserve it.”
Then John’s eyebrow quirked up for a second, as if to ask if Evan deserved it. And Evan shook his head, saying, “Not a thing.”
“I’m not saying it’s okay, because it isn’t. But right now, there’s nothing to do about it. He’s still fired up and talking to him is only going to end in more yelling. Just go to your quarters, get some rest and focus on tomorrow’s mission. I’ll see if I can get through to Rodney.”
“Sir…you don’t have to…”
“I’m not doing this because I’m your CO or because I’m on his team. I’m doing this because I consider both you and Rodney friends, and God knows how many times you’ve run interference for me and Carson,” John interrupted, grinning at the end.
“He’s not going to be happy…”
John rolled his eyes. “Please, tell me something I don’t know. I’ll do my best with Rodney, though I make no promises. You just do you’re best to get back here in one piece.”
“I make no promises,” Evan echoed. “You know this galaxy.”
John snorted. “Get to your quarters, and that’s an order, Major.”
“Yes, sir,” Evan said, and he did just that.
---
“Ever get the feeling we’re jinxed?” Lt. Brian Coffey asked as the team made its way through the unprotected plains of an alien planet in a torrential downpour.
“If this were the Colonel’s team, I’d say that’s a stupid question,” Lt. Justin Dillon replied, shifting his pack on his back.
“I think the Colonel inadvertently jinxed us,” Evan muttered.
“And how’s that?” Coffey asked.
“He just did,” Evan answered in that tone that his men all too well. It was his ‘ask no further questions and you’ll keep blood volume’ tone that let friend and foe alike know to drop the topic if they were smart. And Evan’s men were smart.
The trio continued as much silence as they could muster. At least no one said a word until they reached the hill that led to the gate. And as the trio looked down, they knew it was going to be ugly.
“How do we take this?” Dillon asked, looking at his team leader.
“Carefully,” Evan answered. “It’s not like we can just walk around. We had to climb up, we have to climb down.”
It was a nice thought, and that’s all it was. By the time they were down the hill, there was red mixed into the brown mud that covered them. And Dillon wasn’t standing well on his own.
“I’ll dial the gate, you keep an eye on him,” Evan told Coffey, who only nodded since he was already keeping Dillon upright.
Once the gate was dialed and Evan put through his IDC, he motioned for Coffey to get Dillon through first while Evan followed with their gear. The wormhole closed behind them, and Coffey lowered Dillon to the floor as gently as he could manage. They heard a slight commotion, and Evan looked up to see John running down the stairs with Dr. Weir and Rodney only two steps behind.
“We need a medic for Dillon,” Evan told them, and Weir relayed the message. “Coffey and I’ll be just fine.”
“Well, you’re both getting looked at anyway,” John said with narrowed eyes. “What the Hell happened?”
“Surprise downpour weakened the hillside that led to the gate,” Evan answered. “But all-in-all, things went well.”
“We’ll debrief in one hour. First, I want you all in the infirmary, and then cleaned up and in dry clothes,” John ordered, getting two nods in response.
The medics arrived to tend to Dillon while Evan and Coffey followed. Once Evan and Coffey were patched up, cleaned up and dried off, they went to the debrief while Dillon did his best to enjoy his time in the infirmary.
Once the debrief was over, Coffey was quickly dismissed. Once the CO and XO were alone, John shut the door and looked across the desk.
“You look horrible,” John smiled while Evan shot him a look.
“Thanks, sir,” was Evan’s tired reply.
“I did talk to Rodney, though I’m not sure how well he listened. Talking to him today was like talking to a brick wall,” John said, deciding that teasing Evan wasn’t that much fun when the other man was exhausted.
Evan nodded. “Honestly, I don’t have the energy to worry about it. I just want to sleep for a few hours.”
“Then do it. There’s nothing that needs your immediate attention,” John said, then ushered Evan out of the office.
Once in his quarters, Evan changed from his BDUs into sweats and a T-shirt and crawled into bed. And once his head was on the pillow and his eyes closed, he was out. Having been asleep, he had no concept of time when the sensation of the bed dipping woke him from his sound slumber. Slowly opening his eyes, it took a minute for Evan to realize that Rodney had gotten into bed next to him.
“Rodney?” Evan muttered, burying his face in his pillow for a second before turning back towards Rodney.
“If you want me to go…” Rodney began, but stopped short when he saw Evan shaking his head.
“Surprised.”
“I wanted to go with you to the infirmary…I didn’t since I wasn’t sure if you wanted me there…”
“’Course I did…” Evan mumbled, moving so he could lie more comfortably in Rodney’s arms.
“John told me, probably thinks I didn’t hear him at all, but I did. I heard and he made me realize what I was doing and what I’d done and I’m very sorry.”
“What’d he say?”
“Oh, you know John, he said a lot. But he said I was hurting you and that was quite stupid of me to do, especially since I’m a genius. And that if I didn’t smarten up, he’d make sure that I was very sorry. I don’t know what he had in mind, but I know I don’t want to find out.”
“Probably make you watch Timeline again,” Evan offered.
Evan knew Rodney enough to know there was a roll of the eyes before Rodney replied, “Gah, that would be cruel and unusual punishment. Especially since he’s already subjected me to Back to the Future more than once.”
“You just take the movies too seriously.”
“Can’t help it. Anyway…you okay? I mean…your mission?”
“Might be sore for a few days, but I’ll be fine.”
“Good,” Rodney said, kissing Evan’s hair. “You okay from last night?”
“Same as above,” Evan yawned. “But it’s getting better already.”
“You mind if I keep you company?”
“I’d mind if you didn’t,” Evan answered. “Wake me up for breakfast.”
And lying in the warmth of Rodney’s arms, Evan fell asleep while all Rodney could do was lie awake and wonder how he was going to fix things.
FIN
Author: 1000traenen
Summary: It’s a lover’s spat for Lorne and McKay. And Sheppard gets involved in a surprising way.
Pairing: McKay/Lorne
Rating: FRT
Categories: Hurt/Comfort
Prompt: #10- Fight
Disclaimer: Since you don’t see stuff like this on TV, suffice it to say that they aren’t mine. The quoted song lyrics belong to Chris Carrabba of Dashboard Confessional.
Spoilers: none.
A/N: for the 10_hurt_comfort comm. Link to my table. Not beta’d, so all mistakes are mine.
---
And you held her looser than you would have if you ever could have known
Some things tie your life together, slender threads and things to treasure'>
She said, "no one is alone the way you are alone"
And you held her looser than you would have if you ever could have known
Some things tie your life together, slender threads and things to treasure
-Dashboard Confessional “Dusk & Summer”
---
“Ya know, Rodney, this is why you’re so alone,” Evan said as he paused by the door, then he left without looking back.
Even if the Atlantis doors could slam, this one wouldn’t have. Rodney was the angry one, but Evan was the one who walked out of the room. And while Rodney stayed in his quarters with an open mouth but otherwise unmoving, Evan walked along the halls with his head down. Evan’s first stop was the thankfully sparse mess hall where he made a cup of coffee. And instead of going to where he could easily be found, Evan made his way to John Sheppard’s office for two reasons. One- he could distract himself with paperwork since there was enough to last both the CO and XO for a week straight. Two- It was Sheppard’s office, there was no reason for most anyone to look for him there.
Evan shrugged off his coat, draping across the seat of the small sofa while he sat in his usual chair (across from Sheppard’s), grabbed one of the many pens scattered around the office, and opened the first folder he got his hands on. With a pen in one hand and a cup of coffee in the other, Evan forced himself to focus on what was right in front of him.
Setting a file aside (he’d lost count after two, he didn’t really care how many he got done), he opened another file. But instead of reading the words, he realized that he should feel bad for walking out before the argument was resolved. But there were only so many insults he could take, and it didn’t take long for Evan to reach his limit. That hurt trumped whatever guilt he may have been harboring. Taking the last sip of coffee left in his cup, he shook his head and went back to the paperwork. He could do this for another hour before he should try to get some rest for his mission the following day.
He didn’t get far into that file when he noticed someone standing in the doorway. Evan raised his eyes slowly, and it took getting to the person’s shirt for him to figure out that Rodney hadn’t found him, if he was even looking. But Evan didn’t feel a sense of relief since the crossed arms and narrowed eyes in the doorway belonged to Lt. Col. John Sheppard. Sheppard, who was Evan’s CO and more importantly Rodney’s teammate. Evan put the pen down and sighed. He was so screwed.
“Sir,” Evan said, standing up.
“You have a mission tomorrow, right?” John asked, coming into the office.
“Yes, sir. Mission brief at 0730 and departure at 0830,” Evan rattled off.
“Then what the Hell are you doing here?” John asked with a sigh for emphasis.
“Unwinding, sir.”
“Unwinding?” John repeated, with Evan only meekly nodding. “Nobody unwinds with paperwork. What’s going on?”
“Rodney and I got into a fight. Figured I was safe here if he went looking for me. I’m just out of patience right now.”
John nodded, then went around the desk to sit in his chair. “What happened? The last I saw Rodney was he was in the lab, obsessing over something that went…”
And then John’s hand went over his head in dramatization. Evan nodded and took a deep breath, and answered John as he stared at the desk.
“Ya know, I don’t even remember how it started. I just know we were in his quarters, talking about another team’s mission…next thing I know, he’s screaming at me. It’s just…I’m used to him. I’m used to him ranting and raving and every so often using me as a verbal punching bag because he can’t yell at someone else and he’s got to get it out of his system. I guess I just didn’t want to listen to it anymore tonight.”
John nodded, having known Rodney for quite some time. “He doesn’t mean anything by it.”
“I know. It’s just…he says things. I know he doesn’t mean them personally…to me. But he still says them…” Evan quietly admitted.
John leaned back in his chair, then rubbed his hands over his face for a second. “I’ve heard about his verbal lashings from some of the other scientists,” John said a minute later. “I just never realized he’d do the same to you when you didn’t deserve it.”
Then John’s eyebrow quirked up for a second, as if to ask if Evan deserved it. And Evan shook his head, saying, “Not a thing.”
“I’m not saying it’s okay, because it isn’t. But right now, there’s nothing to do about it. He’s still fired up and talking to him is only going to end in more yelling. Just go to your quarters, get some rest and focus on tomorrow’s mission. I’ll see if I can get through to Rodney.”
“Sir…you don’t have to…”
“I’m not doing this because I’m your CO or because I’m on his team. I’m doing this because I consider both you and Rodney friends, and God knows how many times you’ve run interference for me and Carson,” John interrupted, grinning at the end.
“He’s not going to be happy…”
John rolled his eyes. “Please, tell me something I don’t know. I’ll do my best with Rodney, though I make no promises. You just do you’re best to get back here in one piece.”
“I make no promises,” Evan echoed. “You know this galaxy.”
John snorted. “Get to your quarters, and that’s an order, Major.”
“Yes, sir,” Evan said, and he did just that.
---
“Ever get the feeling we’re jinxed?” Lt. Brian Coffey asked as the team made its way through the unprotected plains of an alien planet in a torrential downpour.
“If this were the Colonel’s team, I’d say that’s a stupid question,” Lt. Justin Dillon replied, shifting his pack on his back.
“I think the Colonel inadvertently jinxed us,” Evan muttered.
“And how’s that?” Coffey asked.
“He just did,” Evan answered in that tone that his men all too well. It was his ‘ask no further questions and you’ll keep blood volume’ tone that let friend and foe alike know to drop the topic if they were smart. And Evan’s men were smart.
The trio continued as much silence as they could muster. At least no one said a word until they reached the hill that led to the gate. And as the trio looked down, they knew it was going to be ugly.
“How do we take this?” Dillon asked, looking at his team leader.
“Carefully,” Evan answered. “It’s not like we can just walk around. We had to climb up, we have to climb down.”
It was a nice thought, and that’s all it was. By the time they were down the hill, there was red mixed into the brown mud that covered them. And Dillon wasn’t standing well on his own.
“I’ll dial the gate, you keep an eye on him,” Evan told Coffey, who only nodded since he was already keeping Dillon upright.
Once the gate was dialed and Evan put through his IDC, he motioned for Coffey to get Dillon through first while Evan followed with their gear. The wormhole closed behind them, and Coffey lowered Dillon to the floor as gently as he could manage. They heard a slight commotion, and Evan looked up to see John running down the stairs with Dr. Weir and Rodney only two steps behind.
“We need a medic for Dillon,” Evan told them, and Weir relayed the message. “Coffey and I’ll be just fine.”
“Well, you’re both getting looked at anyway,” John said with narrowed eyes. “What the Hell happened?”
“Surprise downpour weakened the hillside that led to the gate,” Evan answered. “But all-in-all, things went well.”
“We’ll debrief in one hour. First, I want you all in the infirmary, and then cleaned up and in dry clothes,” John ordered, getting two nods in response.
The medics arrived to tend to Dillon while Evan and Coffey followed. Once Evan and Coffey were patched up, cleaned up and dried off, they went to the debrief while Dillon did his best to enjoy his time in the infirmary.
Once the debrief was over, Coffey was quickly dismissed. Once the CO and XO were alone, John shut the door and looked across the desk.
“You look horrible,” John smiled while Evan shot him a look.
“Thanks, sir,” was Evan’s tired reply.
“I did talk to Rodney, though I’m not sure how well he listened. Talking to him today was like talking to a brick wall,” John said, deciding that teasing Evan wasn’t that much fun when the other man was exhausted.
Evan nodded. “Honestly, I don’t have the energy to worry about it. I just want to sleep for a few hours.”
“Then do it. There’s nothing that needs your immediate attention,” John said, then ushered Evan out of the office.
Once in his quarters, Evan changed from his BDUs into sweats and a T-shirt and crawled into bed. And once his head was on the pillow and his eyes closed, he was out. Having been asleep, he had no concept of time when the sensation of the bed dipping woke him from his sound slumber. Slowly opening his eyes, it took a minute for Evan to realize that Rodney had gotten into bed next to him.
“Rodney?” Evan muttered, burying his face in his pillow for a second before turning back towards Rodney.
“If you want me to go…” Rodney began, but stopped short when he saw Evan shaking his head.
“Surprised.”
“I wanted to go with you to the infirmary…I didn’t since I wasn’t sure if you wanted me there…”
“’Course I did…” Evan mumbled, moving so he could lie more comfortably in Rodney’s arms.
“John told me, probably thinks I didn’t hear him at all, but I did. I heard and he made me realize what I was doing and what I’d done and I’m very sorry.”
“What’d he say?”
“Oh, you know John, he said a lot. But he said I was hurting you and that was quite stupid of me to do, especially since I’m a genius. And that if I didn’t smarten up, he’d make sure that I was very sorry. I don’t know what he had in mind, but I know I don’t want to find out.”
“Probably make you watch Timeline again,” Evan offered.
Evan knew Rodney enough to know there was a roll of the eyes before Rodney replied, “Gah, that would be cruel and unusual punishment. Especially since he’s already subjected me to Back to the Future more than once.”
“You just take the movies too seriously.”
“Can’t help it. Anyway…you okay? I mean…your mission?”
“Might be sore for a few days, but I’ll be fine.”
“Good,” Rodney said, kissing Evan’s hair. “You okay from last night?”
“Same as above,” Evan yawned. “But it’s getting better already.”
“You mind if I keep you company?”
“I’d mind if you didn’t,” Evan answered. “Wake me up for breakfast.”
And lying in the warmth of Rodney’s arms, Evan fell asleep while all Rodney could do was lie awake and wonder how he was going to fix things.
FIN