051 Fools Frightend- "The Dragon and the Bard"
Title: The Dragon and the Bard
Author: ginnekomiko
Word Count: 543
Universe the story takes place in: The Princess and the Dragon
Character(s) Used: A bard, a prince and a dragon.
Rating: PG for mild sexual themes
Summary/Prompt: 051. Fools frightened. Or, never underestimate the bard.
The Dragon and the Bard
Slay the dragon to save the princess. He’d heard that story before. It was boring and overdone. Yet, his highness demanded that he try to win the girl who had been trapped in a tower for eighteen years. Honestly, who brought their bard with them to slay a dragon? What was he supposed to do, serenade it to death?
“Come, fool! We must save the fair maiden from her sad fate! If I succeed, I will surely get many spoils including right to the fair lady
herself!” said the prince.
Ah yes, the whole, “You saved me, now I offer myself to you as a reward,” thing.
So was he supposed to write a song about sexual conquest as well as slaying a dragon? Lovely, the prince would get two times the bragging rights.
“Sir, are you sure you’re prepared to fight a dragon?” the bard asked.
“Of course! I’m a prince! Princes always win against dragons!”
“Is that so?” a voice asked.
“Did you say something, fool?” the prince asked.
“That wasn’t me, sir,” said the bard. He turned around. A massive black dragon charged towards them. The bard stepped to the side. The prince, however, was pinned against a cliff by the dragon’s claws.
“Why have you approached my tower?” the dragon asked.
“I have come to slay you foul beast!” said the prince.
“Oh really?” the dragon looked at the bard. “And you?”
“I’m just the messenger. I’m supposed to write a song about his conquests which may or may not include killing you, stealing your wealth, and screwing the princess.”
“WHAT?” the dragon demanded.
“You idiot!” the prince cried. “Don’t eat me!”
“PATHETIC SACK OF MEAT! THE LIKES OF YOU WILL NEVER SLAY ME! I WOULD ROAST YOU ALIVE BEFORE I WOULD ALLOW YOU TO EVEN LAY EYES ON MY TREASURES!”
“That’s what I told him, but did he listen to me? No!” said the bard.
“Shut up, fool!” the prince screamed.
The dragon turned her head. “You, do you tell stories?”
The bard paused. “Yes. I’m a teller of stories, singer of songs and ballads, and producer of witty one liners.”
“I see. You’ll do.”
“Not for dinner, I hope?”
“No. The girl requires company of her own specie. I will allow you to meet her. If she likes you, you may stay in this castle. If you are a wise fool, you will not share this prince’s ideas of conquest in any sense because if you do, I will eat you.”
“Sounds like an interesting story regardless,” said the bard.
The dragon turned attention back to the prince. “As for you...” The dragon ran one claw down the prince’s body, cutting through his expensive armor like it was nothing. “I will let you live to show my charge I can be kind to visitors, but do not come back here ever again.” The prince was promptly dropped.
“Wow! I never knew he could run that fast. I shall write a song about this! ‘How Prince Harold Ran Away Screaming like a Sissy in the Wake of a Dragon.’ How does that sound to you, dragon?”
“Appropriate.”The dragon walked back towards the castle. “Are you coming, storyteller?”
“Right away!” said the bard.
Author: ginnekomiko
Word Count: 543
Universe the story takes place in: The Princess and the Dragon
Character(s) Used: A bard, a prince and a dragon.
Rating: PG for mild sexual themes
Summary/Prompt: 051. Fools frightened. Or, never underestimate the bard.
The Dragon and the Bard
Slay the dragon to save the princess. He’d heard that story before. It was boring and overdone. Yet, his highness demanded that he try to win the girl who had been trapped in a tower for eighteen years. Honestly, who brought their bard with them to slay a dragon? What was he supposed to do, serenade it to death?
“Come, fool! We must save the fair maiden from her sad fate! If I succeed, I will surely get many spoils including right to the fair lady
herself!” said the prince.
Ah yes, the whole, “You saved me, now I offer myself to you as a reward,” thing.
So was he supposed to write a song about sexual conquest as well as slaying a dragon? Lovely, the prince would get two times the bragging rights.
“Sir, are you sure you’re prepared to fight a dragon?” the bard asked.
“Of course! I’m a prince! Princes always win against dragons!”
“Is that so?” a voice asked.
“Did you say something, fool?” the prince asked.
“That wasn’t me, sir,” said the bard. He turned around. A massive black dragon charged towards them. The bard stepped to the side. The prince, however, was pinned against a cliff by the dragon’s claws.
“Why have you approached my tower?” the dragon asked.
“I have come to slay you foul beast!” said the prince.
“Oh really?” the dragon looked at the bard. “And you?”
“I’m just the messenger. I’m supposed to write a song about his conquests which may or may not include killing you, stealing your wealth, and screwing the princess.”
“WHAT?” the dragon demanded.
“You idiot!” the prince cried. “Don’t eat me!”
“PATHETIC SACK OF MEAT! THE LIKES OF YOU WILL NEVER SLAY ME! I WOULD ROAST YOU ALIVE BEFORE I WOULD ALLOW YOU TO EVEN LAY EYES ON MY TREASURES!”
“That’s what I told him, but did he listen to me? No!” said the bard.
“Shut up, fool!” the prince screamed.
The dragon turned her head. “You, do you tell stories?”
The bard paused. “Yes. I’m a teller of stories, singer of songs and ballads, and producer of witty one liners.”
“I see. You’ll do.”
“Not for dinner, I hope?”
“No. The girl requires company of her own specie. I will allow you to meet her. If she likes you, you may stay in this castle. If you are a wise fool, you will not share this prince’s ideas of conquest in any sense because if you do, I will eat you.”
“Sounds like an interesting story regardless,” said the bard.
The dragon turned attention back to the prince. “As for you...” The dragon ran one claw down the prince’s body, cutting through his expensive armor like it was nothing. “I will let you live to show my charge I can be kind to visitors, but do not come back here ever again.” The prince was promptly dropped.
“Wow! I never knew he could run that fast. I shall write a song about this! ‘How Prince Harold Ran Away Screaming like a Sissy in the Wake of a Dragon.’ How does that sound to you, dragon?”
“Appropriate.”The dragon walked back towards the castle. “Are you coming, storyteller?”
“Right away!” said the bard.