Supernatural - Dean Winchester - 13 - Wrong
Title: Moody: My Life With the Winchesters, Part 16A
Characters: John/ofc, Dean/ofc, Sam/ofc
Rating: R (NC-17 for story overall)
Prompt: 13 - wrong
Disclaimer: I own nothing Supernatural.
Warning: One ofc is with each of the Winchesters at different times. No Threesomes.
Summary: Nora is acting out of character.
The hours melted into each other in the stuffy interior of the truck. I took off my sweatshirt and laid it by my coat on the seat.
"Too warm?" John automatically moved to adjust the heater.
"Aren't you?"
"No."
I sighed. "How much further do we have to go?"
"Sam's got the map and we're following him and Dean. Do you need to stop?"
"I just want out of this damned truck."
John watched me carefully before answering, "We'll call it an early night. You feeling okay?"
"Not my fault the heater's broke." I laid my head against the window and watched the world whiz by.
***
I got frustrated with the trials of being on the road. After many months, I'd thought it wouldn't ever bother me since it never had. I hated the diners and the standard menu that they all had. I missed having my own kitchen. I wanted to make my grandma's recipe for chocolate chip cookies and didn't even know if it had made it into my suitcase when Sam and John had gone to pack up my belongings.
Sam and Dean returned from interviewing witnesses to find me tossing items out of my bag. Clothes were spread all over the room. I'd left them wherever they landed.
"Um," Sam was the first to speak when they stopped in their tracks, "What are you looking for?"
"I had it on my list. Why didn't you get it if I had it on my list?" I didn't even look up as I kept digging. When I tipped my bag over and shook it to make sure nothing else was inside, I looked up to find both of them staring at me, clearly confused.
"Nora, let us help you find whatever it is that has you so upset."
"It doesn't matter." I wiped at the tears streaming down my face. "It's not here." I turned into a sobbing mess on the floor.
Shrugging, Sam looked at Dean, indicating that it was his turn to try.
Dean crouched down by me. "What's got you so upset?"
I'd forgotten they were there. "Nothing." It was the truth. Compared to what they dealt with every single day, a misplaced recipe that I didn't even have the resources to follow was nothing. "They give you any information?" My head was pounding and I wanted to talk about anything but how I'd been acting.
"A couple stories line up. We have a few more leads."
Sam was picking up what I'd tossed when he asked if I'd seen John.
"He left to talk to the pastor at the church. It was almost two hours ago. He should be back soon." I tried to stop sniffling.
"Do you know what he was after?" Dean was holding my hands and I pulled them free so I could pick up the result of my little tantrum.
"The church records. Burials. Births."
Dean grasped my fluttering hands. "Are you okay?"
I started to cry again. "I don't know."
"You don't know? Did something happen?"
"Why do you think something had to happen? I can take care of myself, you know. I did just fine before I left with you." The mean words not only slipped out, I couldn't make them stop. "Run here. Drive there. Dirty motel rooms and nasty diner food." I stood up as I got wound up. "Everything is rotten. Just get out!"
Sam set the pile of clothes he was holding on the table. "Nora?"
"You heard me! Just get out!"
Stunned, they both left the room, telling me to call them if I needed anything. The door closed and I sunk back down to the floor, wondering what I had just done and why.
***
The big pieces were off the floor when John stopped in later that day. I'd ignored their knocks when they had come to get me for supper. They'd left and I foolishly had thought that I was off the hook and free to wallow in my misery. After all, if they really wanted to get in, they didn't need a key.
"The room looks better than they described but you don't." He put his lockpicks away and approached me on the bed. I was surrounded by a pile of tissues. He pushed some away and took a seat. "What's going on, Nora? You're just not you lately." He rubbed my back and I let myself lean into him.
"I know I'm not. I don't know why."
"You seemed fine before I left," he looked across the room instead of at me, allowing me to tuck my head against his shoulder.
"I don't know what's wrong with me or why I'm doing all this stupid crying. Maybe I just need some time to myself."
"Really? Time alone didn't seem to help you today."
"I hate to ask, but can you sleep with the guys tonight?" I felt him tense up. "Just for tonight, I promise. It'll all look better in the morning."
"You sure?"
I nodded and tried to give him a small smile. "I just needed to have my little freak out. I'll be fine."
"You can call-"
"I know I can." I kissed his cheek. "I'm sorry for how I acted. Can you tell Sam and Dean for me?"
"They aren't looking for an apology, Nora. They want you to be happy. No matter what it takes, we want you to be happy. I didn't realize how much we depend on you until you were absent from our lives for a few hours today. Let's just say that there wasn't much talking during our meal. Do you need anything before I go?"
"A hug?"
John stood and drew me to him. "Get a good night's sleep and we'll be by in the morning. Unless you want to sleep in?"
"I'll probably be up early. In case I'm not, here's a key." I grabbed it off the top of the television.
He gratefully took the key that he didn't really need but would make his life easier. "Goodnight, Nora."
"Night." I called after him as he closed the door behind him. In the silence of my room, I tried to pull myself together. I was doing better and then fell to pieces again. I finally fell asleep after midnight when I'd cried myself out.