Sweet Valley Kids #12: Sweet Valley Trick Or Treat
I was trying to do all the Sweet Valley Kids books in order, but I have to jump ahead to book #12. Not because three through eleven are too painful to recap (they probably are), but because #12 is the first of three Halloween-themed SVK books.
Yes, I said first of three. Books twelve, twenty-three, and thirty-three are all books about Halloween. In all three books, the twins are seven years old.
In the same second grade class.
With the same teacher.
With the same classmates.
So, either the twins and all their classmates failed second grade three times in a row or everyone in Sweet Valley suffers from amnesia and celebrates Halloween three times every year.
Oh, and I should also point out that somewhere between book two and book twelve, the twins have graduated from first grade to second grade… with the same class… and the same teacher… and the same class hamster. Way to pay attention, ghostwriter!
But more on that stuff later. Right now, let’s stick with Sweet Valley Kids #12: Sweet Valley Trick or Treat.
The books begins with Jessica and Elizabeth coming home from school. Along with their big brother Steven, they admire the “scary” decorations on a neighbor’s house. These include ghosts made out of pillowcases and a cardboard skeleton. Oh, the horror! They manage to make it home without peeing their pants, and decide to try on their costumes from last year. It seems that Princess Jessica had dressed up as a clown the previous year, but her costume no longer fits. That’s what she gets for going off her diet! As the twins ponder what to do about this, Steven runs into the room with a pillowcase on his head and scares his sisters. Typical sibling banter ensues, and Steven makes fun of the fact Elizabeth is missing her front tooth. Elizabeth retorts that she got a special prize from the tooth fairy (but that prize is never mentioned). Elizabeth’s missing tooth is important for later on in the story.
The next day in class, Mrs. Otis announces that it’s time to vote on how the class pumpkin should be carved. Really important topics they’re teaching kids these days! What’s next? What color should we paint the room? Anyway, so the class votes to carve their pumpkin based on a drawing made by Todd, and Elizabeth is quick to notice the drawing is missing a tooth just like her. (Do I sense a second grade love connection? Bow-chicka-bow-wow). Mrs. Otis then announces they’ll carve the pumpkin tomorrow. What?! Not now? They voted! Carve the vegetable now! I COMMAND YOU! *shakes angry fist*
When the twins get home from school, Mrs. Wakefield surprises them by announcing she’s just gotten back from a garage sale and bought an entire box full of costumes that conveniently fit the girls!
Hold the phone. A garage sale? What, did Ned lose his job? Are the Wakefields tight on money? The Unicorns would never approve of Jessica wearing a *gasp* second-hand costume! Alice is supposed to purchase new costumes directly from a seamstress to the stars! Come on, ghostwriter! Haven’t you read Sweet Valley Twins? You’re 0-2 right now…
In an effort to please their mother, the girls begin trying on the measly second-hand costumes. While they begin ooh-ing and ahh-ing over the colorful fabrics, Alice holds up a princess dress and a witch dress. Jessica immediately squeals over the shiny princess outfit, while Elizabeth is upset because she likes the princess dress, too.
“But somebody has to be the witch,” Jessica pointed out. “Besides, I’ve always wanted to be a princess.”
You’re already one, Jess. You don’t need to rub it in by wearing the costume.
Forgetting there’s an entire box filled with outfits, Alice tells the girls to talk it over and come to a fair decision about the princess and the witch dresses. Suffering from ADD, the girls immediately head upstairs to their room and never come to a conclusion about the outfits.
The next day in class, Mrs. Otis never carves the Love Pumpkin like promised, but instead asks everyone what they’re going to be for Halloween. Lois announces she’s going to be the Tooth Fairy (what's with teeth in this book?!), Todd’s going to be a ghost, and Lila… well… read this and tell me what’s wrong:
Lila Fowler held up her hand. She always wore fancy costumes that her parents rented from a costume store. “I’m going to be a Mexican lady with a lace shawl and a fan made of real feathers.”
If you guessed the plural form of “parent”, you’re right!
Seriously, didn’t Lila’s mother leave her when she was still crawling? Who is this mysterious second parent?
Ghostwriter: 0. Readers: 3.
The rest of the class continues to answer Mrs. Otis’s question. When it’s Jessica’s turn, she announces she’s going to be a princess.
Elizabeth stared at his sister. “Jessica!” she whispered. “That’s not fair!”
Jessica wriggled around on her chair. “I’m sorry, Liz. I’m so excited about Halloween that the words just came out.”
“But we didn’t decide yet,” Elizabeth reminded her.
“I know,” Jessica said. “But I really really really want to be the princess.”
Silly Jess. She needs to peek into her future and read her some SVT.
No, wait, never mind. She already has:
“Well, I think that princesses should have perfect smiles,” [Jessica] said. “You can’t be a princess if you have a tooth missing.”
Other princess qualifications include: Wearing purple, not hanging out with fat people, and dating a new boy every other week.
Skipping over the painful Haunted House chapter (seriously painful), One Track Mind Jessica announces for the second time that she’s dressing up as the princess for Halloween. This time it’s to Mom as they’re carving the family pumpkin. (Sadly, this one isn’t designed by Todd with Elizabeth in mind.) Elizabeth gets really upset over Jessica’s announcement, and Alice asks why. When Elizabeth says still haven’t made up their minds about the costume, Jessica pipes up:
“Mom, don’t you think Elizabeth would make a better witch? She has a missing tooth,” Jessica said. “Princesses should have pretty smiles.” She smiled to show she had all her teeth.
Is this the daughter of a lawyer, or what?
“Even princesses lose their teeth,” Mrs. Wakefield told Jessica.
Oh no, she didn’t! Jessica got SERVED!
(It’s also mentioned in this pointless chapter that Alice is a good artist because she drew a great face on the pumpkin, and is studying to be an interior decorator. What one has to do with the other, I haven’t a clue.)
The next morning, fate decides to mess with Jessica. Oh yes, you guessed it, Jessica looses a tooth-the same exact tooth Elizabeth lost. Apparently twins really do share everything, including the same exact loose teeth. Oh, what timing! Well, it looks like both girls have to be witches now.
But now that Jessica realizes her own logic has worked against her, she does what any normal princess would do; she changes her mind. Apparently it’s perfectly okay for princesses to be missing teeth, and Jessica comes up with a brilliant plan (which I figured out at the beginning of the book): Jessica and Elizabeth should time-share the costumes! It’s decided that for school, Jessica should be the witch and Elizabeth should be the princess. (But didn’t Jessica announce in class that she was going to be the princess? Why mess with people?) Then when they get home from school, the girls should switch their costumes. Oh, what a brilliant plan!
School is relatively uneventful, with the exception of the school principal picking Mrs. Otis’s pumpkin as the best pumpkin in the school. (Apparently they did carve the pumpkin, but it wasn’t important enough to be mentioned. And following Sweet Valley logic, since Todd designed the pumpkin, does this mean he should study to be an interior decorator, too? Maybe he’ll get his own show on the Style Network.) After the pumpkin contest, the school has their annual Halloween parade, with Mrs. Otis leading the class dressed as a chalkboard eraser. It’s then a clean sweep for the class as Winston wins an award for scariest costume (he was an alien) and Mrs. Otis wins an award for best teacher costume. Wow, what great writing!
At the end of the day, the twins get even for Steven scaring them in the beginning of the book. Jessica hides in Steven’s closet, then jumps out, making the older boy trip backwards and fall on his backside. He yells at Jessica never to do that again. Stupid brothers.
Pretty soon, it’s time to go trick or treating. Lila, Amy, Ellen, and Eva (who was introduced prior to this book) all arrive at the Wakefield house. The twins then let their friends in on their “master plan” of switching the costumes so they each get a turn at being the princess. Everyone thinks it’s a fantastic idea. (And Lila didn’t even think of it!) They also tell the girls about how Jessica scared Steven, and that Elizabeth plans on scaring him later in the evening. Mrs. Wakefield then dresses up as Mr. Wakefield and takes the girls trick-or-treating, leaving no one at their own house to hand out treats, because Mr. Wakefield, yet again, is absent from this novel. (For a lawyer who may or may not have a job because his Sweet Valley wife is shopping at garage sales, he’s certainly away from home a lot.)
At the end of the night (8:30, to be exact), Elizabeth hides in the front bushes, and scares the crap out of Steven when he returns from trick or treating. Their brother is completely fooled by the “Witch Switch” and has no idea it’s Elizabeth in the costume. Jessica is thrilled their ingenious plan worked. Oh, to be seven again.
The final chapter of this book, like always, sets up the next novel. But since I'm recapping the Halloween books out of sequential order, I won't recap the final chapter and get your hopes up.
Well, that’s it for this pathetic book. Look for recaps of the other SVK Halloween books soon!
Yes, I said first of three. Books twelve, twenty-three, and thirty-three are all books about Halloween. In all three books, the twins are seven years old.
In the same second grade class.
With the same teacher.
With the same classmates.
So, either the twins and all their classmates failed second grade three times in a row or everyone in Sweet Valley suffers from amnesia and celebrates Halloween three times every year.
Oh, and I should also point out that somewhere between book two and book twelve, the twins have graduated from first grade to second grade… with the same class… and the same teacher… and the same class hamster. Way to pay attention, ghostwriter!
But more on that stuff later. Right now, let’s stick with Sweet Valley Kids #12: Sweet Valley Trick or Treat.
The books begins with Jessica and Elizabeth coming home from school. Along with their big brother Steven, they admire the “scary” decorations on a neighbor’s house. These include ghosts made out of pillowcases and a cardboard skeleton. Oh, the horror! They manage to make it home without peeing their pants, and decide to try on their costumes from last year. It seems that Princess Jessica had dressed up as a clown the previous year, but her costume no longer fits. That’s what she gets for going off her diet! As the twins ponder what to do about this, Steven runs into the room with a pillowcase on his head and scares his sisters. Typical sibling banter ensues, and Steven makes fun of the fact Elizabeth is missing her front tooth. Elizabeth retorts that she got a special prize from the tooth fairy (but that prize is never mentioned). Elizabeth’s missing tooth is important for later on in the story.
The next day in class, Mrs. Otis announces that it’s time to vote on how the class pumpkin should be carved. Really important topics they’re teaching kids these days! What’s next? What color should we paint the room? Anyway, so the class votes to carve their pumpkin based on a drawing made by Todd, and Elizabeth is quick to notice the drawing is missing a tooth just like her. (Do I sense a second grade love connection? Bow-chicka-bow-wow). Mrs. Otis then announces they’ll carve the pumpkin tomorrow. What?! Not now? They voted! Carve the vegetable now! I COMMAND YOU! *shakes angry fist*
When the twins get home from school, Mrs. Wakefield surprises them by announcing she’s just gotten back from a garage sale and bought an entire box full of costumes that conveniently fit the girls!
Hold the phone. A garage sale? What, did Ned lose his job? Are the Wakefields tight on money? The Unicorns would never approve of Jessica wearing a *gasp* second-hand costume! Alice is supposed to purchase new costumes directly from a seamstress to the stars! Come on, ghostwriter! Haven’t you read Sweet Valley Twins? You’re 0-2 right now…
In an effort to please their mother, the girls begin trying on the measly second-hand costumes. While they begin ooh-ing and ahh-ing over the colorful fabrics, Alice holds up a princess dress and a witch dress. Jessica immediately squeals over the shiny princess outfit, while Elizabeth is upset because she likes the princess dress, too.
“But somebody has to be the witch,” Jessica pointed out. “Besides, I’ve always wanted to be a princess.”
You’re already one, Jess. You don’t need to rub it in by wearing the costume.
Forgetting there’s an entire box filled with outfits, Alice tells the girls to talk it over and come to a fair decision about the princess and the witch dresses. Suffering from ADD, the girls immediately head upstairs to their room and never come to a conclusion about the outfits.
The next day in class, Mrs. Otis never carves the Love Pumpkin like promised, but instead asks everyone what they’re going to be for Halloween. Lois announces she’s going to be the Tooth Fairy (what's with teeth in this book?!), Todd’s going to be a ghost, and Lila… well… read this and tell me what’s wrong:
Lila Fowler held up her hand. She always wore fancy costumes that her parents rented from a costume store. “I’m going to be a Mexican lady with a lace shawl and a fan made of real feathers.”
If you guessed the plural form of “parent”, you’re right!
Seriously, didn’t Lila’s mother leave her when she was still crawling? Who is this mysterious second parent?
Ghostwriter: 0. Readers: 3.
The rest of the class continues to answer Mrs. Otis’s question. When it’s Jessica’s turn, she announces she’s going to be a princess.
Elizabeth stared at his sister. “Jessica!” she whispered. “That’s not fair!”
Jessica wriggled around on her chair. “I’m sorry, Liz. I’m so excited about Halloween that the words just came out.”
“But we didn’t decide yet,” Elizabeth reminded her.
“I know,” Jessica said. “But I really really really want to be the princess.”
Silly Jess. She needs to peek into her future and read her some SVT.
No, wait, never mind. She already has:
“Well, I think that princesses should have perfect smiles,” [Jessica] said. “You can’t be a princess if you have a tooth missing.”
Other princess qualifications include: Wearing purple, not hanging out with fat people, and dating a new boy every other week.
Skipping over the painful Haunted House chapter (seriously painful), One Track Mind Jessica announces for the second time that she’s dressing up as the princess for Halloween. This time it’s to Mom as they’re carving the family pumpkin. (Sadly, this one isn’t designed by Todd with Elizabeth in mind.) Elizabeth gets really upset over Jessica’s announcement, and Alice asks why. When Elizabeth says still haven’t made up their minds about the costume, Jessica pipes up:
“Mom, don’t you think Elizabeth would make a better witch? She has a missing tooth,” Jessica said. “Princesses should have pretty smiles.” She smiled to show she had all her teeth.
Is this the daughter of a lawyer, or what?
“Even princesses lose their teeth,” Mrs. Wakefield told Jessica.
Oh no, she didn’t! Jessica got SERVED!
(It’s also mentioned in this pointless chapter that Alice is a good artist because she drew a great face on the pumpkin, and is studying to be an interior decorator. What one has to do with the other, I haven’t a clue.)
The next morning, fate decides to mess with Jessica. Oh yes, you guessed it, Jessica looses a tooth-the same exact tooth Elizabeth lost. Apparently twins really do share everything, including the same exact loose teeth. Oh, what timing! Well, it looks like both girls have to be witches now.
But now that Jessica realizes her own logic has worked against her, she does what any normal princess would do; she changes her mind. Apparently it’s perfectly okay for princesses to be missing teeth, and Jessica comes up with a brilliant plan (which I figured out at the beginning of the book): Jessica and Elizabeth should time-share the costumes! It’s decided that for school, Jessica should be the witch and Elizabeth should be the princess. (But didn’t Jessica announce in class that she was going to be the princess? Why mess with people?) Then when they get home from school, the girls should switch their costumes. Oh, what a brilliant plan!
School is relatively uneventful, with the exception of the school principal picking Mrs. Otis’s pumpkin as the best pumpkin in the school. (Apparently they did carve the pumpkin, but it wasn’t important enough to be mentioned. And following Sweet Valley logic, since Todd designed the pumpkin, does this mean he should study to be an interior decorator, too? Maybe he’ll get his own show on the Style Network.) After the pumpkin contest, the school has their annual Halloween parade, with Mrs. Otis leading the class dressed as a chalkboard eraser. It’s then a clean sweep for the class as Winston wins an award for scariest costume (he was an alien) and Mrs. Otis wins an award for best teacher costume. Wow, what great writing!
At the end of the day, the twins get even for Steven scaring them in the beginning of the book. Jessica hides in Steven’s closet, then jumps out, making the older boy trip backwards and fall on his backside. He yells at Jessica never to do that again. Stupid brothers.
Pretty soon, it’s time to go trick or treating. Lila, Amy, Ellen, and Eva (who was introduced prior to this book) all arrive at the Wakefield house. The twins then let their friends in on their “master plan” of switching the costumes so they each get a turn at being the princess. Everyone thinks it’s a fantastic idea. (And Lila didn’t even think of it!) They also tell the girls about how Jessica scared Steven, and that Elizabeth plans on scaring him later in the evening. Mrs. Wakefield then dresses up as Mr. Wakefield and takes the girls trick-or-treating, leaving no one at their own house to hand out treats, because Mr. Wakefield, yet again, is absent from this novel. (For a lawyer who may or may not have a job because his Sweet Valley wife is shopping at garage sales, he’s certainly away from home a lot.)
At the end of the night (8:30, to be exact), Elizabeth hides in the front bushes, and scares the crap out of Steven when he returns from trick or treating. Their brother is completely fooled by the “Witch Switch” and has no idea it’s Elizabeth in the costume. Jessica is thrilled their ingenious plan worked. Oh, to be seven again.
The final chapter of this book, like always, sets up the next novel. But since I'm recapping the Halloween books out of sequential order, I won't recap the final chapter and get your hopes up.
Well, that’s it for this pathetic book. Look for recaps of the other SVK Halloween books soon!