Sweet Valley Twins Super Summer Fun Book
I found this book about ten years ago, hidden in my bookstore’s bargain bin. Didn’t they realise what a gem they were giving away for the low, low price of $1.50?? This isn’t really keeping with the Halloween theme of the mo’, but seeing as how it’s almost summer where I live (Australia), it seemed appropriate.
Right, so this book doesn’t have a story - it’s (as the back cover says) “your fun-packed guide to the greatest vacation ever!” “Elizabeth shares her favourite summer projects and gives you advice on ways to beat the summer heat. Jessica tells you how to start a club as fabulous as the Unicorns and gives you pointers on throwing the coolest parties”.
Oooh! Ooh! And there’s also fashion tips from the Unicorns (!!) and a bunch of fill-in sections (best movie of the summer, etc), Sweet Valley trivia quizzes & word searches, as well as a summer calendar and stuff like that.…I have to say, this book excited me so much as a kid. It made me feel like the twins were real people.
The books at the back are listed until SVT #39, so we can safely assume this was published around then.
At the start they have this cute “Hi, Everybody!” greeting that’s “signed” by the twins (with signatures and everything). Then every entry after that is written in first person, either by “Elizabeth” or “Jessica”.
Here are some of Jessica’s tips for starting a club as “great” as the Unicorns.
“The Unicorn Club has a great name. Unicorns are rare and beautiful, just like the members of our club. Make sure you pick a name that tells everyone how special the members of your club are.”
“Dues: The Unicorns each pay a dime every week. You can use the club money to throw parties, go on trips, or by materials for special club projects”.
Wow! The Unicorns went Hawaiian for 70c a week?
“Once your club is formed, you may want to have new members join every once in a while”.
You may also want to be totally bitchy to some people who want to join, and throw tantrums when those you invite to join don’t want to.
Moving on, Elizabeth gives us some tips for a “Beat the Heat BBQ Party”. She tells us how to make invitations, what decorations to use, and gives recipes for “Grapesicles”, “Frozen Orange Mini-pops” and “BBQ Cheese Dogs” (watch out, Prince Albert). Then she suggests some cool-down games like apple bobbing and balloon throwing (what about throwing people in the pool??! Oh, wait, that’s more of a Sweet Valley High thing).
Okay, and now comes the best part…Unicorn fashion tips *rubs hands together in glee*. I want to list these in full, cos they’re so awesome.
Firstly, they suggest “Spectacular socks”. Oh, 1990 fashion:
“Believe it or not, something as small as socks can make a huge difference in your wardrobe. Here’s an example: you’re wearing a bright blue vest, a yellow t-shirt and jeans. It’s a pretty standard look - until you pull on a pair of yellow socks with hot pink polka dots! Now you’re ready for fun!”
………………………………………………*Blank stare*
So, they suggest making over your “old, boring” socks with sequins, glitter/permanent paint, buttons, and other sock (and soul)-destroying accessories. Whee! According to this book,“Remember, both socks don’t have to be the same! Jessica made a pair that said ‘What’ on one, and ‘Now?’ on the other”. As Malaura from Ghostworld would say, “Funk-ay”.
Then there’s a page called “The Best Barrettes”. Apparently, “Janet Howell, president of the Unicorns, has a barrette collection. She owns every kind of barrette you can buy”. She does? This is never mentioned in the books. I’m surprised they didn’t use Elizabeth as the example for this, isn’t she all barrette-crazy? In any case, apparently Janet threw a barrette-decorating party for the Unicorns, where they decorated their barrettes with ribbon, beads and…stamps. Yup. Well, at least they’re encouraging girls to be creative. I remember trying to make the ribbon barrettes as a kid. I cried when the ribbon I glued on came unstuck during school.
Next come brilliant belts. “You’ll be surprised how many articles of clothing can be turned into fantastic belts. You may start an incredible new fashion trend!” =D How many articles of clothing can be turned into fantastic belts? Three. Scarves, ties and beads. Yup. Woot.
The next awesome fashion tip is “Friendship Bracelets”. One of the things I actually don’t want to ridicule. C’mon, they were fun, y’all.
Um, and the next is “Tie-Dying”. Seriously? The Unicorns think this is cool? I really don’t think Lila would approve of tie-dye.
Then there’s “High-Fashion Hair”, which apparently consists of wearing pretty hair accessories, and curling your hair with pipe-cleaners. Well, that’s pretty age-appropriate.
Hahaha, there are some categories you fill in yourself, and I’d like to note that I listed Jennifer Aniston as “Worst Actress”. Go, ten year old me.
The Unicorn’s favourite recipe for a facial mask consists of
½ cup dry oatmeal
1 cup yogurt and
1 tablespoon honey.
That sounds like a delicious breakfast to me.
Oh man, there’s more. Stupendous sneakers. Pretty much the same thing as the socks, but with shoes. “Janet made a terrific pair. She wrote ‘The Unicorn Club’ on the left shoe, and traced a picture of a unicorn on the right shoe. Then she asked all of the Unicorns to autograph them. Some of us just wrote our names, some drew pictures and designs. They are definitely unique!” They do sound…unique.
Ha, Jessica listed Bruce Patman under “Cutest Boy”. Too bad there’s no “Date Rapiest Boy” category. Elizabeth listed Danny Jackson as “Best Athlete”. Who the heck is Danny Jackson?
Lolz! “Cool Color Combos”.
“Color is cruicial, so don’t mess it up! Mr. Bowman is our English teacher. He always wears terrible outfits. One day he came to school in dark green checked pants with an orange shirt and a red sweater. There was nothing wrong with his pants, shirt or sweater - except that the colors didn’t go together. Don’t be like Mr. Bowman! Unless you are weaing something that is designed to be multicoloured (like Lila’s new black, red, green, blue and yellow jumpsuit), remember that there is a limit to how many colors you can mix together. There is also a limit on patterns, you can’t wear polka dots, checks stripes and plaid all at once!”
Pretty good advice, actually. They list purple and hot pink, purple and green, red and black and pink and gray as good color combinations.
I listed “Where’s the Love” by Hanson as best music video??? What was I smoking back then? Oh yeah. Crack.
Haha, there’s this awesome “Be a Sweet Valley Star!” section, where you enter your name and your best friend’s name into a “fill in the blanks” two-page story. It’s called “Just like Jessica”, and involves Jess (or me, I guess) stealing a pink sweater from Elizabeth’s room and being caught ‘pink-handed’. Bless.
Then there’s some tips for a Sweet Valley-themed slumber party (they suggest dressing up as your favourite Sweet Valley characters) and Jessica’s Johnny Buck-themed party (are we supposed to have slumber parties themed after fictional music stars?). There’s some recipes for brownies (mmm!) and “Jessica’s Twinsplits” (banana splits. LOL! Twinsplits!).
The coolest thing (in my opinion) are the horoscopes at the end. They write a little blurb about what kind of person you are, and use a SVT character as an example. Briefly, Janet Howell is an Aries, Francine Pascal is a Taurus, Elizabeth and Jessica Wakefield are Geminis, Todd Wilkins and Mary Wallace are Cancers, Lila Fowler and Amy Sutton are Leos, Julie Porter is a Virgo, Patrick Morris is a Libra, Bruce Patman and Brooke Dennis are Scorpios, Ellen Riteman is a Sagittarius, Peter DeHaen and Nora Mercandy are both Capricorns, Belinda Lawton is an Aquarius, and Olivia Davidson is a Pisces. So which character are you like? According to this, I’m Todd or Mary-esque. Ew…boring.
And that’s pretty much it…it ends with a ‘summer calendar’ and some spaces for photos and autographs and stuff. Whee!
PS: Incidentally, while I was looking for the image for this book, I came across a bunch of other images here. I was so excited at some of them =D Man, I'd love to get my hands on some of these:
A map of Sweet Valley!!!...Er, it looks pretty small.
Sweet Valley Audio Tapes. Lolz! Can u imagine reading these books aloud with a straight face?
Sweet Valley DOLLS!!!! Omfg. "Twin sisters, twice the fun!"...Did Bruce Patman design these?
This is supposed to be the "Campus Cool Jessica" doll. ...Cool? Really? I guess those Unicorn fashion tips were pretty spot on.
"Campus Cool Elizabeth". What the shit is that hat supposed to be on her head? It's like a beret mixed with Santa's hat.
And last but not least, a must for any SV fan: A Sweet Valley neon sign. Good for reading Sweet Valley books next to. Um. Why are Liz and Jess ensconced in a heart? They're sisters, not lovers. Just sayin'.
Thanks for reading my weird non-review. =)
Right, so this book doesn’t have a story - it’s (as the back cover says) “your fun-packed guide to the greatest vacation ever!” “Elizabeth shares her favourite summer projects and gives you advice on ways to beat the summer heat. Jessica tells you how to start a club as fabulous as the Unicorns and gives you pointers on throwing the coolest parties”.
Oooh! Ooh! And there’s also fashion tips from the Unicorns (!!) and a bunch of fill-in sections (best movie of the summer, etc), Sweet Valley trivia quizzes & word searches, as well as a summer calendar and stuff like that.…I have to say, this book excited me so much as a kid. It made me feel like the twins were real people.
The books at the back are listed until SVT #39, so we can safely assume this was published around then.
At the start they have this cute “Hi, Everybody!” greeting that’s “signed” by the twins (with signatures and everything). Then every entry after that is written in first person, either by “Elizabeth” or “Jessica”.
Here are some of Jessica’s tips for starting a club as “great” as the Unicorns.
“The Unicorn Club has a great name. Unicorns are rare and beautiful, just like the members of our club. Make sure you pick a name that tells everyone how special the members of your club are.”
“Dues: The Unicorns each pay a dime every week. You can use the club money to throw parties, go on trips, or by materials for special club projects”.
Wow! The Unicorns went Hawaiian for 70c a week?
“Once your club is formed, you may want to have new members join every once in a while”.
You may also want to be totally bitchy to some people who want to join, and throw tantrums when those you invite to join don’t want to.
Moving on, Elizabeth gives us some tips for a “Beat the Heat BBQ Party”. She tells us how to make invitations, what decorations to use, and gives recipes for “Grapesicles”, “Frozen Orange Mini-pops” and “BBQ Cheese Dogs” (watch out, Prince Albert). Then she suggests some cool-down games like apple bobbing and balloon throwing (what about throwing people in the pool??! Oh, wait, that’s more of a Sweet Valley High thing).
Okay, and now comes the best part…Unicorn fashion tips *rubs hands together in glee*. I want to list these in full, cos they’re so awesome.
Firstly, they suggest “Spectacular socks”. Oh, 1990 fashion:
“Believe it or not, something as small as socks can make a huge difference in your wardrobe. Here’s an example: you’re wearing a bright blue vest, a yellow t-shirt and jeans. It’s a pretty standard look - until you pull on a pair of yellow socks with hot pink polka dots! Now you’re ready for fun!”
………………………………………………*Blank stare*
So, they suggest making over your “old, boring” socks with sequins, glitter/permanent paint, buttons, and other sock (and soul)-destroying accessories. Whee! According to this book,“Remember, both socks don’t have to be the same! Jessica made a pair that said ‘What’ on one, and ‘Now?’ on the other”. As Malaura from Ghostworld would say, “Funk-ay”.
Then there’s a page called “The Best Barrettes”. Apparently, “Janet Howell, president of the Unicorns, has a barrette collection. She owns every kind of barrette you can buy”. She does? This is never mentioned in the books. I’m surprised they didn’t use Elizabeth as the example for this, isn’t she all barrette-crazy? In any case, apparently Janet threw a barrette-decorating party for the Unicorns, where they decorated their barrettes with ribbon, beads and…stamps. Yup. Well, at least they’re encouraging girls to be creative. I remember trying to make the ribbon barrettes as a kid. I cried when the ribbon I glued on came unstuck during school.
Next come brilliant belts. “You’ll be surprised how many articles of clothing can be turned into fantastic belts. You may start an incredible new fashion trend!” =D How many articles of clothing can be turned into fantastic belts? Three. Scarves, ties and beads. Yup. Woot.
The next awesome fashion tip is “Friendship Bracelets”. One of the things I actually don’t want to ridicule. C’mon, they were fun, y’all.
Um, and the next is “Tie-Dying”. Seriously? The Unicorns think this is cool? I really don’t think Lila would approve of tie-dye.
Then there’s “High-Fashion Hair”, which apparently consists of wearing pretty hair accessories, and curling your hair with pipe-cleaners. Well, that’s pretty age-appropriate.
Hahaha, there are some categories you fill in yourself, and I’d like to note that I listed Jennifer Aniston as “Worst Actress”. Go, ten year old me.
The Unicorn’s favourite recipe for a facial mask consists of
½ cup dry oatmeal
1 cup yogurt and
1 tablespoon honey.
That sounds like a delicious breakfast to me.
Oh man, there’s more. Stupendous sneakers. Pretty much the same thing as the socks, but with shoes. “Janet made a terrific pair. She wrote ‘The Unicorn Club’ on the left shoe, and traced a picture of a unicorn on the right shoe. Then she asked all of the Unicorns to autograph them. Some of us just wrote our names, some drew pictures and designs. They are definitely unique!” They do sound…unique.
Ha, Jessica listed Bruce Patman under “Cutest Boy”. Too bad there’s no “Date Rapiest Boy” category. Elizabeth listed Danny Jackson as “Best Athlete”. Who the heck is Danny Jackson?
Lolz! “Cool Color Combos”.
“Color is cruicial, so don’t mess it up! Mr. Bowman is our English teacher. He always wears terrible outfits. One day he came to school in dark green checked pants with an orange shirt and a red sweater. There was nothing wrong with his pants, shirt or sweater - except that the colors didn’t go together. Don’t be like Mr. Bowman! Unless you are weaing something that is designed to be multicoloured (like Lila’s new black, red, green, blue and yellow jumpsuit), remember that there is a limit to how many colors you can mix together. There is also a limit on patterns, you can’t wear polka dots, checks stripes and plaid all at once!”
Pretty good advice, actually. They list purple and hot pink, purple and green, red and black and pink and gray as good color combinations.
I listed “Where’s the Love” by Hanson as best music video??? What was I smoking back then? Oh yeah. Crack.
Haha, there’s this awesome “Be a Sweet Valley Star!” section, where you enter your name and your best friend’s name into a “fill in the blanks” two-page story. It’s called “Just like Jessica”, and involves Jess (or me, I guess) stealing a pink sweater from Elizabeth’s room and being caught ‘pink-handed’. Bless.
Then there’s some tips for a Sweet Valley-themed slumber party (they suggest dressing up as your favourite Sweet Valley characters) and Jessica’s Johnny Buck-themed party (are we supposed to have slumber parties themed after fictional music stars?). There’s some recipes for brownies (mmm!) and “Jessica’s Twinsplits” (banana splits. LOL! Twinsplits!).
The coolest thing (in my opinion) are the horoscopes at the end. They write a little blurb about what kind of person you are, and use a SVT character as an example. Briefly, Janet Howell is an Aries, Francine Pascal is a Taurus, Elizabeth and Jessica Wakefield are Geminis, Todd Wilkins and Mary Wallace are Cancers, Lila Fowler and Amy Sutton are Leos, Julie Porter is a Virgo, Patrick Morris is a Libra, Bruce Patman and Brooke Dennis are Scorpios, Ellen Riteman is a Sagittarius, Peter DeHaen and Nora Mercandy are both Capricorns, Belinda Lawton is an Aquarius, and Olivia Davidson is a Pisces. So which character are you like? According to this, I’m Todd or Mary-esque. Ew…boring.
And that’s pretty much it…it ends with a ‘summer calendar’ and some spaces for photos and autographs and stuff. Whee!
PS: Incidentally, while I was looking for the image for this book, I came across a bunch of other images here. I was so excited at some of them =D Man, I'd love to get my hands on some of these:
A map of Sweet Valley!!!...Er, it looks pretty small.
Sweet Valley Audio Tapes. Lolz! Can u imagine reading these books aloud with a straight face?
Sweet Valley DOLLS!!!! Omfg. "Twin sisters, twice the fun!"...Did Bruce Patman design these?
This is supposed to be the "Campus Cool Jessica" doll. ...Cool? Really? I guess those Unicorn fashion tips were pretty spot on.
"Campus Cool Elizabeth". What the shit is that hat supposed to be on her head? It's like a beret mixed with Santa's hat.
And last but not least, a must for any SV fan: A Sweet Valley neon sign. Good for reading Sweet Valley books next to. Um. Why are Liz and Jess ensconced in a heart? They're sisters, not lovers. Just sayin'.
Thanks for reading my weird non-review. =)