Jessica vs. Elizabeth, or Sweet Valley Twins 14: "Tug of War"
Sweet Valley Twins #14: Tug of War
(This is my first snark, so bear with me...also, sorry for the crappy condition of the cover scan, but I couldn't find any internet scans & so I scanned mine which is in less than perfect condition. You can click to see it larger if you'd like.)
First off, the cover. To me, Jessica's sign says “Jessica Wakefield is no one.” Why didn’t she just use a number sign and write “Jessica Wakefield is #1”? It would have made much more sense and avoided any confusion. And Elizabeth should have planned out the spacing on her pin better or drawn a picture on the bottom. And seriously, Elizabeth, what middle schooler wears a shirt like that?
So, the current sixth grade class president is moving and therefore they need to elect another president. Shouldn’t they have had a vice president? Or another office that would assume the presidential position in circumstances like this? Anyway, the Hairnet - excuse me, I mean Mrs. Arnette - lets the class spend an entire period to have a goodbye party for the girl who’s moving and all the students bring food. Good thing education is so important at Sweet Valley Middle School. Elizabeth can’t imagine moving from Sweet Valley - she thinks Sweet Valley is “the most perfect place in the world.”
Like I said, the sixth grade now has to elect another president. Elizabeth considers being class president, but decides she probably can’t do it since she’s so busy being student council treasurer. The Unicorns all think that a Unicorn should be class president, of course. Jim Sturbridge thinks that the next class president should be a boy and he jokingly points at Randy Mason, a thin boy with glasses who is apparently a total nerd since he’s so shy and studious.
Julie Porter announces that the sixth grade is running the book fair this year and that means they decide what to do with the money they earn - probably $200-$300. Jessica thinks the money should be spent to throw an “incredible” party (surprise, surprise). The Unicorns all think that is an excellent idea. But Amy says that since they’re using money from the book fair, they should spend the money on something to do with books. So Jess says that the party can be a costume party and everyone can dress up as a character from their favorite books. Don't you have to actually read books to know about the characters? And also - what's so great about a sixth grade school-sponsored party? Isn’t this still around the time when boys would stand at one end of the room (by the snack table) and the girls would stand at the other end of the room and they would all just giggle nervously and awkwardly and the boys would stick food up their noses? Maybe that doesn't happen in Sweet Valley.
So then Elizabeth has a bright idea - the money should be spent on a VCR for the library. Apparently the school does not have one VCR. I know this book was written in 1987 and all, but not even ONE VCR in the whole school? And the VCR will cost $200-$300?
That afternoon Elizabeth is riding at Carson Stables and her riding instructor says she’s “got the makings of a real horsewoman.” Elizabeth is elated. She goes home to tell Jessica, but finds Lila and Ellen in Jessica’s room with her. They belittle Elizabeth a bit but she doesn’t say anything mean because she “shouldn’t be rude to Jessica’s guests.” She leaves, mad that Jess didn’t even ask how Liz’s day riding was. But then Amy and Julie come over and Elizabeth gets to share her riding news with them. Julie also says that the new sixth grade class president will decide what should be done with the proceeds from the book fair.
The next day is the assembly to nominate the next class president. Mr. Bowman, the class advisor, explains that the nominated candidates will have a week to campaign before another assembly where the elections will take place. Oh, and it’s not a popularity contest, of course. Then Amy nominates Elizabeth, much to Liz's surprise and delight. And then…Lila stands up and nominates Jessica! Gasp! Oh, and then Jim Sturbridge nominates the nerd Randy Mason, because Jim is just oh-so-funny and doesn't know when to let a joke drop.
After school, Jess is excited about running for class president. As she puts, it, they’ll get to see who’s got the most friends. They figure Randy Mason isn’t going to get any votes. And then Jessica starts talking like she’s going to win. Liz asks if their campaigning is going to be a fair fight, and Jessica says “Oh, sure” in an offhand way while her eyes sparkle. Oh dear! When the twins announce their class president nominations at the dinner table, the Wakefield parents don’t think it will be a problem - “Elizabeth and Jessica are running for something, not against each other,” says Mrs. Wakefield. Dream on. Later that night, Liz thinks, “Jessica would never do anything sneaky or nasty to win-not to her own sister. It would be just like their father said: a healthy competition.” Liz, for someone who’s supposedly so smart and blessed with common sense…you are pretty dense.
Amy, Julie, and Liz plan Liz’s campaign at Casey’s. Randy Mason also happens to be there with his parents who are congratulating him on his nomination, and Liz feels bad for him because he is so naïve. Liz’s plans for the sixth grade are: starting an award for the best sixth grade teacher, buying the VCR for the library, and maybe better cafeteria food, even though she’s not sure she can promise that.
For her campaign, Jessica is going to have a pool party at Lila’s house - Liz finds this out because Lila apparently called Amy to invite her to it, since Amy’s a Booster (the cheerleading squad - Amy’s the only non-Unicorn on it). I don't understand why Lila invited Amy to this exclusive/secret from Liz party, since Lila should know that Amy is supporting Elizabeth.
Liz makes a flyer that lists all her promises (the reader is not privy to these promises, though) and they decide to run off enough for the whole class and some extras - one hundred and fifty total. Way to kill trees, Liz. Are all those flyers really necessary? Couldn’t you just hang up a couple? Do you think kids will really read them and care if they get their own flyer? After making the copies, Liz, Amy, and Julie leave the copies briefly to help the librarian, and when they come back, the flyers are gone! Oh noes! But Liz figures someone just took them by accident. Until she gets called down to the office because apparently all one hundred and fifty flyers are floating in the fountain in front of the school. Wait…the middle school has a fountain, but not one single VCR? I love how important education is here. Oh, and Liz sees a flyer that Randy hung up. Randy’s says: “For maximum efficiency in advocating rights and issues pertinent to all sixth-grade students, vote for Randy Mason.” Thank goodness he's not fulfilling a stereotype here. And God, he didn't even distribute one flyer to every classmate plus extras - he's so clueless! Liz tells Randy no one’s going to know what the hell his flyer says, since Sweet Valley doesn't give them much of an education, and she tells him to use words they’ll understand - nothing more than two syllables. She wonders why she’s helping her opponent, but then thinks that he “was so sweet and pitiful, she couldn’t just let him make a fool of himself.” Thank goodness for Saint Elizabeth. Oh, and he also doesn’t realize that the president gets to decide what to do with the book fair money and that there's a big debate about this.
So Jess has her pool party at Lila’s house, complete with a big cake with white icing and tiny pink candy roses around the edges with pink icing that says JESSICA FOR PRESIDENT. And…Charlie Cashman shoves some girl into the pool. I guess it's next to impossible to be near a pool in Sweet Valley without someone getting pushed in, no matter how old you are. Also we find out that Jessica has no idea what a class president does, but she hopes it won’t take up too much time. She also finds out that Ellen and Lila had put Liz’s flyers in the fountain. She feels funny after hearing that. It’s called guilt, Jess, a feeling you're not really used to, I'm sure. Her guilt doesn’t last long, but she decides that she’s better spy on Liz to make sure that Liz isn't plotting against her. When she gets home, Liz is talking about a “fabulous plan” with Amy and Julie, but won’t tell Jess what the fabulous plan is. Jess snoops and finds out Liz plans to talk at a rally after the soccer game. Jess gets worried because a lot of people will be at the soccer game and will listen to her. But Lila says not to worry. The day of the soccer game, Jess and Lila are in the parking lot waiting for a special delivery from Speedy Messenger Service. Lila’s father apparently “made some calls” and got a ton of records (!) featuring Johnny Buck’s latest single - it hasn’t even been released in stores yet. And they’re going to spread the word that they're giving away the free records so that everyone leaves the soccer game early and no one’s there to hear Liz speak. Seems a little extravagant to me. And it works. Really? Even the boys love Johnny Buck? I assumed he was just some cheesy pop singer, the kind that boys prefer to make fun of and call “gay.” Kind of like Joey Lawrence.
Well, Liz is depressed after that ordeal and Steven says she’s being a wimp. So after thinking about it for a bit, she finds some of Jess’s campaign posters and draws moustaches on Jess’s pictures. Jess is pissed. The Wakefield parents almost discipline them and say that if their fighting keeps up, they’ll both have to drop out. Liz considers dropping out anyway, because she’s a total doormat and she doesn’t want to fight with Jess any longer. But Amy says, “It’s about time Jessica learned she can’t always get her own way.” Dream on.
The next day, Julie points out a flyer on the bulletin board to Amy and Liz. The flyer has small and light letters and Liz can barely read it, but it says “If you want to hear what Randy Mason will do for you, come to a rally after school today.” Liz shakes her head sadly because Randy still doesn't know the art of flyering for a campaign. Of course only five kids show up to hear him speak. But he has good ideas, like having a party with the book fair money, but charging admission so that they can also buy a VCR. It’s genius! So simple! Why didn’t Elizabeth think of that?! She considers stealing his ideas and talks to Mrs. Wakefield about all of it. Her mother says, “Just think about it for awhile, and I’m sure you’ll realize what you have to do.” Probably vomit on her and her 'motherly' advice...that's what I'd do.
The next day is the election assembly. Jess wears a dark pink jersey dress with a purple sash. Hot. Liz is wearing orange, causing Jess to worry about clashing. In the auditorium, some kids start cheering “Jessica! Jessica!” while others cheer “Elizabeth! Elizabeth!” No one chants Randy’s name, because he’s a nerd who wears glasses, even if he is thin.
Jess gives her speech first, and she basically just talks about the amazing party they’ll throw with the book fair money. She doesn’t know what else the president does, so she just flashes lots of brilliant smiles. Amy asks her, “What are you going to do besides spend the book fair money on a costume party?” Jess stares blankly and replies, “Gee, I don’t know, whatever sixth grade presidents are supposed to do, I guess.” She pauses. “As long as it doesn’t take too much time…” She finishes off with another bright smile.
It’s Liz’s turn next and she’s pretty nervous. She informs the class that she thinks that Randy has much better ideas than she does, so she’s dropping out. A gasp goes through the room. So Liz gets off the stage, and Randy gives his speech, and people realize that even though he has glasses and he studies and doesn't push people in pools, he’s got some good ideas and would make a good class president. So he wins the election and Jess is a little pissed until she realizes that if she were class president, she’d have to go to a meeting every week, which would totally get in the way of her social life and her ballet classes.
The last chapter is full of very subtle foreshadowing for the next book. Jess is watching music videos and drooling over a cute singer. “I wish I could meet a boy like that,” she says. “He’s not a boy, Jess,” says Liz, “he’s a man. He must be at least twenty.” And Jess says, “But boys our age are so childish. I wish I could meet an older boy.” And then she goes on about how nice it would be to date an older boy, yadda yadda yadda. And lo and behold, she goes to the roller skating rink (!) and an older boy catches her when she’s falling…which leads up to the next book, The Older Boy.
Oh yeah. And people “toss their heads” a lot in this book, which disturbs me slightly.
(This is my first snark, so bear with me...also, sorry for the crappy condition of the cover scan, but I couldn't find any internet scans & so I scanned mine which is in less than perfect condition. You can click to see it larger if you'd like.)
First off, the cover. To me, Jessica's sign says “Jessica Wakefield is no one.” Why didn’t she just use a number sign and write “Jessica Wakefield is #1”? It would have made much more sense and avoided any confusion. And Elizabeth should have planned out the spacing on her pin better or drawn a picture on the bottom. And seriously, Elizabeth, what middle schooler wears a shirt like that?
So, the current sixth grade class president is moving and therefore they need to elect another president. Shouldn’t they have had a vice president? Or another office that would assume the presidential position in circumstances like this? Anyway, the Hairnet - excuse me, I mean Mrs. Arnette - lets the class spend an entire period to have a goodbye party for the girl who’s moving and all the students bring food. Good thing education is so important at Sweet Valley Middle School. Elizabeth can’t imagine moving from Sweet Valley - she thinks Sweet Valley is “the most perfect place in the world.”
Like I said, the sixth grade now has to elect another president. Elizabeth considers being class president, but decides she probably can’t do it since she’s so busy being student council treasurer. The Unicorns all think that a Unicorn should be class president, of course. Jim Sturbridge thinks that the next class president should be a boy and he jokingly points at Randy Mason, a thin boy with glasses who is apparently a total nerd since he’s so shy and studious.
Julie Porter announces that the sixth grade is running the book fair this year and that means they decide what to do with the money they earn - probably $200-$300. Jessica thinks the money should be spent to throw an “incredible” party (surprise, surprise). The Unicorns all think that is an excellent idea. But Amy says that since they’re using money from the book fair, they should spend the money on something to do with books. So Jess says that the party can be a costume party and everyone can dress up as a character from their favorite books. Don't you have to actually read books to know about the characters? And also - what's so great about a sixth grade school-sponsored party? Isn’t this still around the time when boys would stand at one end of the room (by the snack table) and the girls would stand at the other end of the room and they would all just giggle nervously and awkwardly and the boys would stick food up their noses? Maybe that doesn't happen in Sweet Valley.
So then Elizabeth has a bright idea - the money should be spent on a VCR for the library. Apparently the school does not have one VCR. I know this book was written in 1987 and all, but not even ONE VCR in the whole school? And the VCR will cost $200-$300?
That afternoon Elizabeth is riding at Carson Stables and her riding instructor says she’s “got the makings of a real horsewoman.” Elizabeth is elated. She goes home to tell Jessica, but finds Lila and Ellen in Jessica’s room with her. They belittle Elizabeth a bit but she doesn’t say anything mean because she “shouldn’t be rude to Jessica’s guests.” She leaves, mad that Jess didn’t even ask how Liz’s day riding was. But then Amy and Julie come over and Elizabeth gets to share her riding news with them. Julie also says that the new sixth grade class president will decide what should be done with the proceeds from the book fair.
The next day is the assembly to nominate the next class president. Mr. Bowman, the class advisor, explains that the nominated candidates will have a week to campaign before another assembly where the elections will take place. Oh, and it’s not a popularity contest, of course. Then Amy nominates Elizabeth, much to Liz's surprise and delight. And then…Lila stands up and nominates Jessica! Gasp! Oh, and then Jim Sturbridge nominates the nerd Randy Mason, because Jim is just oh-so-funny and doesn't know when to let a joke drop.
After school, Jess is excited about running for class president. As she puts, it, they’ll get to see who’s got the most friends. They figure Randy Mason isn’t going to get any votes. And then Jessica starts talking like she’s going to win. Liz asks if their campaigning is going to be a fair fight, and Jessica says “Oh, sure” in an offhand way while her eyes sparkle. Oh dear! When the twins announce their class president nominations at the dinner table, the Wakefield parents don’t think it will be a problem - “Elizabeth and Jessica are running for something, not against each other,” says Mrs. Wakefield. Dream on. Later that night, Liz thinks, “Jessica would never do anything sneaky or nasty to win-not to her own sister. It would be just like their father said: a healthy competition.” Liz, for someone who’s supposedly so smart and blessed with common sense…you are pretty dense.
Amy, Julie, and Liz plan Liz’s campaign at Casey’s. Randy Mason also happens to be there with his parents who are congratulating him on his nomination, and Liz feels bad for him because he is so naïve. Liz’s plans for the sixth grade are: starting an award for the best sixth grade teacher, buying the VCR for the library, and maybe better cafeteria food, even though she’s not sure she can promise that.
For her campaign, Jessica is going to have a pool party at Lila’s house - Liz finds this out because Lila apparently called Amy to invite her to it, since Amy’s a Booster (the cheerleading squad - Amy’s the only non-Unicorn on it). I don't understand why Lila invited Amy to this exclusive/secret from Liz party, since Lila should know that Amy is supporting Elizabeth.
Liz makes a flyer that lists all her promises (the reader is not privy to these promises, though) and they decide to run off enough for the whole class and some extras - one hundred and fifty total. Way to kill trees, Liz. Are all those flyers really necessary? Couldn’t you just hang up a couple? Do you think kids will really read them and care if they get their own flyer? After making the copies, Liz, Amy, and Julie leave the copies briefly to help the librarian, and when they come back, the flyers are gone! Oh noes! But Liz figures someone just took them by accident. Until she gets called down to the office because apparently all one hundred and fifty flyers are floating in the fountain in front of the school. Wait…the middle school has a fountain, but not one single VCR? I love how important education is here. Oh, and Liz sees a flyer that Randy hung up. Randy’s says: “For maximum efficiency in advocating rights and issues pertinent to all sixth-grade students, vote for Randy Mason.” Thank goodness he's not fulfilling a stereotype here. And God, he didn't even distribute one flyer to every classmate plus extras - he's so clueless! Liz tells Randy no one’s going to know what the hell his flyer says, since Sweet Valley doesn't give them much of an education, and she tells him to use words they’ll understand - nothing more than two syllables. She wonders why she’s helping her opponent, but then thinks that he “was so sweet and pitiful, she couldn’t just let him make a fool of himself.” Thank goodness for Saint Elizabeth. Oh, and he also doesn’t realize that the president gets to decide what to do with the book fair money and that there's a big debate about this.
So Jess has her pool party at Lila’s house, complete with a big cake with white icing and tiny pink candy roses around the edges with pink icing that says JESSICA FOR PRESIDENT. And…Charlie Cashman shoves some girl into the pool. I guess it's next to impossible to be near a pool in Sweet Valley without someone getting pushed in, no matter how old you are. Also we find out that Jessica has no idea what a class president does, but she hopes it won’t take up too much time. She also finds out that Ellen and Lila had put Liz’s flyers in the fountain. She feels funny after hearing that. It’s called guilt, Jess, a feeling you're not really used to, I'm sure. Her guilt doesn’t last long, but she decides that she’s better spy on Liz to make sure that Liz isn't plotting against her. When she gets home, Liz is talking about a “fabulous plan” with Amy and Julie, but won’t tell Jess what the fabulous plan is. Jess snoops and finds out Liz plans to talk at a rally after the soccer game. Jess gets worried because a lot of people will be at the soccer game and will listen to her. But Lila says not to worry. The day of the soccer game, Jess and Lila are in the parking lot waiting for a special delivery from Speedy Messenger Service. Lila’s father apparently “made some calls” and got a ton of records (!) featuring Johnny Buck’s latest single - it hasn’t even been released in stores yet. And they’re going to spread the word that they're giving away the free records so that everyone leaves the soccer game early and no one’s there to hear Liz speak. Seems a little extravagant to me. And it works. Really? Even the boys love Johnny Buck? I assumed he was just some cheesy pop singer, the kind that boys prefer to make fun of and call “gay.” Kind of like Joey Lawrence.
Well, Liz is depressed after that ordeal and Steven says she’s being a wimp. So after thinking about it for a bit, she finds some of Jess’s campaign posters and draws moustaches on Jess’s pictures. Jess is pissed. The Wakefield parents almost discipline them and say that if their fighting keeps up, they’ll both have to drop out. Liz considers dropping out anyway, because she’s a total doormat and she doesn’t want to fight with Jess any longer. But Amy says, “It’s about time Jessica learned she can’t always get her own way.” Dream on.
The next day, Julie points out a flyer on the bulletin board to Amy and Liz. The flyer has small and light letters and Liz can barely read it, but it says “If you want to hear what Randy Mason will do for you, come to a rally after school today.” Liz shakes her head sadly because Randy still doesn't know the art of flyering for a campaign. Of course only five kids show up to hear him speak. But he has good ideas, like having a party with the book fair money, but charging admission so that they can also buy a VCR. It’s genius! So simple! Why didn’t Elizabeth think of that?! She considers stealing his ideas and talks to Mrs. Wakefield about all of it. Her mother says, “Just think about it for awhile, and I’m sure you’ll realize what you have to do.” Probably vomit on her and her 'motherly' advice...that's what I'd do.
The next day is the election assembly. Jess wears a dark pink jersey dress with a purple sash. Hot. Liz is wearing orange, causing Jess to worry about clashing. In the auditorium, some kids start cheering “Jessica! Jessica!” while others cheer “Elizabeth! Elizabeth!” No one chants Randy’s name, because he’s a nerd who wears glasses, even if he is thin.
Jess gives her speech first, and she basically just talks about the amazing party they’ll throw with the book fair money. She doesn’t know what else the president does, so she just flashes lots of brilliant smiles. Amy asks her, “What are you going to do besides spend the book fair money on a costume party?” Jess stares blankly and replies, “Gee, I don’t know, whatever sixth grade presidents are supposed to do, I guess.” She pauses. “As long as it doesn’t take too much time…” She finishes off with another bright smile.
It’s Liz’s turn next and she’s pretty nervous. She informs the class that she thinks that Randy has much better ideas than she does, so she’s dropping out. A gasp goes through the room. So Liz gets off the stage, and Randy gives his speech, and people realize that even though he has glasses and he studies and doesn't push people in pools, he’s got some good ideas and would make a good class president. So he wins the election and Jess is a little pissed until she realizes that if she were class president, she’d have to go to a meeting every week, which would totally get in the way of her social life and her ballet classes.
The last chapter is full of very subtle foreshadowing for the next book. Jess is watching music videos and drooling over a cute singer. “I wish I could meet a boy like that,” she says. “He’s not a boy, Jess,” says Liz, “he’s a man. He must be at least twenty.” And Jess says, “But boys our age are so childish. I wish I could meet an older boy.” And then she goes on about how nice it would be to date an older boy, yadda yadda yadda. And lo and behold, she goes to the roller skating rink (!) and an older boy catches her when she’s falling…which leads up to the next book, The Older Boy.
Oh yeah. And people “toss their heads” a lot in this book, which disturbs me slightly.