SVH Senior Year #22: So Not Me
At the request of numbaby, I give you: more Senior Year!
JADE:
Jade Wu is a girl whose had many boyfriends, but none of them have been serious. This is odd to me. I look her up on wikipedia and it notes that she was “a timid Chinese girl who was terrified of defying her traditional father” in regular Sweet Valley High but her character was changed for Senior Year, making her flirtatious cheerleader who lived with her single mom. Good continuity there.
Jessica Wakefield got Jade fired from the House of Java because they were rivals for the affections of Jeremy Aames, who is the quarterback at Big Mesa. They all worked together at the coffee place. Jade won that contest so Jess tried to get even with the firing. Jeremy helps Jade find an interview at a sushi bar. (If I were Chinese the last place I'd want to work would be a sushi bar, you'd get those people who think all Asians look alike asking you about Japan.) But she's happy to have a job and starts hanging out with Jeremy and his sisters.
Jade goes out of her way to rub her relationship with Jeremy in Jessica's face (damn, that's a lot of Js). They spar verbally at school. Jess complains that she can't believe Jeremy would fall for the manipulative Jade. She should've known that since he did date Jessica.
Jeremy's friends at Big Mesa try to convince him to give up on Sweet Valley girls. They think they are all schemers and cheaters. Which is... kinda true. Jeremy exposits that he's not serious about Jade, he's just having fun. Exactly the opposite of what Jade feels. Watch those falling anvils.
We learn that Jade needs this job at the sushi place because her father will not pay child support unless Jade is “pulling her own weight.” That's weird and makes no sense to me. Isn't the point of child support that you support and they are a child? Shrug.
Jade thinks she got the job so she shows up unannounced at Jeremy's house to thank him and give him a present. He, understandably, thinks this is weird. He's beginning to understand that she's not as flippant about the relationship as he is. This is not like her, since she usually dates around.
Jeremy takes Jade to a Big Mesa party and she is very clingy. He thought of it more as a friend-group thing and she's all pissy that they're not spending time alone. She refers to him in her thoughts as her “boyfriend” which is jumping the gun like whoa.
They go out again the next night and Jade makes Jeremy a really dorky card about how much she loves him (as he was joking it was their “anniversary” of 2 weeks). Jeremy also writes a card for Jade and it's awesome:
These have been the best two weeks of my life-or was it three? Whatever. Let's do it again sometime. --J
Jeremy takes Jade to a casual restaurant for their “anniversary.” Jade is confused. She thought anniversaries were supposed to be special and fancy! Nobody clued her onto what the “anni” in “anniversary” stands for I guess. She thinks he's playing a joke on her and is going to take her somewhere nice later, but he doesn't. She really is cookoo for the Cocoa Puffs, eh?
She gives him her creepy-stalker card and he realizes she's serious.
ELIZABETH-CONNOR:
Connor McDermott enters his home to discover all his friends, family and girlfriend (that's Elizabeth) waiting for him. It's an intervention! They want him to stop drinking. He storms out. Liz thinks this is her fault because she said the wrong thing. I think it's probably because he's an alcoholic and I hear they can be a mite unpredictable.
He returns home late that night after they're all gone. He looks for his vodka in his drawer but it's gone, so he finds another bottle in his closet. (He's not an alcoholic though!) In the closet he finds a postcard from his absentee father and decides this is just the perfect time to track him down. He leaves a note for Megan (his sister) saying not to worry. Because notes always work.
Megan, Tia and Elizabeth naturally all freak out. (Connor: But I left a note!)
Liz unloads her self-pitying “it's all my fault” nonsense on Evan Plummer. He must like her or something because he listens to her blather. Later, while she's working, Evan shows up and takes her for ice cream.
Her actual boyfriend (remember him?), is driving to Sticksville, CA looking for his dad. He gets to the town and looks the guy up in the phone book and has some sort of weird crisis when he reads the name “Michael C. McDermott” and realizes he doesn't know what the C stands for. I think I could guess.
Connor decides he doesn't want to deal with his dad tonight so he gets a room and drinks himself to sleep. So, he wakes up hungover, which is a great way to meet your long-lost father.
Back in Sweet Valley, a poem Connor wrote to Liz falls out of her locker and Evan reads it. He must not have any sense of personal boundaries or something because who just reads other people's poetry? Liz starts to cry and Evan hugs her. That's when Andy and Tia show up and they're like “....” The group was planning to get together that night to support each other in these difficult Connor-less times. Evan can't go to the group thing because he has swim practice, so instead he offers to take Liz (and just Liz) to the movies the next day.
Liz thinks this movie can't possible be a date because he's not paying for her. Where's Tia the feminist? Sit that bitch down and explain about going dutch.
Connor, meanwhile, tells his father his mom knows where he is (lie) and suggested he come see Pa (lie). Connor just needs a place to crash. Nothing permanent. Connor thinks it will be awesome to live with Pa because he just needs people to leave him alone. Pa has proven himself the world champ of leaving Connor alone, eleven years running. Seems silly to search out your absentee father so he will leave you alone if he was already doing that.
Tia shows up on Liz's doorstep just as she's about to go to the movie with Evan. Tia is surprised but not overly so and Liz gets defensive and says they're just friends. Then she lets it drop and everyone is happy. Just kidding! Then Liz gets pissy at Tia for even mentioning it, tells her to stop “lecturing” her and so on. Wow, Liz, way to play it cool.
Tia goes to Andy's house to complain. But he awesomely tells her that she wasn't there for him so he doesn't care about her problems. Ha!
Back in Sticksville, Connor's dad is buying him alcohol! They sure do set the parenting bar low in Sweet Valley.
Liz nearly kisses Evan but then she flips out. And scene!
ANDY:
On the way home from the intervention Andy Marsden (who I don't remember) asks Tia (Connor's best friend) if she thinks he ought to tell his parents he's gay. Tia isn't listening; she's worrying about Connor. In fact, none of his friends realize he's having a crisis because they're all too worried about Connor.
Usually those irritating diary entry things of Senior Year bug me. But there's one in here in which Andy talks about watching made for TV movies to learn about coming out. Awesome. Because nothing is more accurate than made for TV movies! Although, I guess, they are very similar to SVH world.
One night, at dinner, his parents ask him if he's planning to take his former girlfriend, Six (the ghostwriters have been watching too much Blossom.) to the homecoming dance. This is awkward because he's gay. And also because they broke up. Oh and because I thought they already had the homecoming dance in #1. Maybe that was just another dance. So many dances, so little time.
At school, Six comes up to Andy after a meeting. She can tell something is wrong with him, and Andy is surprised she noticed because everyone else just wants to talk about Connor. They talk and Six encourages him to come out to his parents, insisting he won't be a disappointment to them just because he's gay.
Finally, Andy comes out to his parents. They are surprised but wish he'd told them sooner. They feel badly he's been keeping it inside or somesuch. They tell him they love him. Everybody hugs. It all feels like a “very special episode” of Sweet Valley High.
MARIA & KEN:
Ken Matthews and Maria Slater are fighting. This confuses me because Maria used to be Winston's girlfriend (nevermind) and in SVH Senior Year #1, Ken was all torn up over Olivia's death. Guess he got over that. Now, Maria says he's all full of himself and flirty with other girls. Dead girlfriend and egotistical? How Patman-esque of him.
JADE:
Jade Wu is a girl whose had many boyfriends, but none of them have been serious. This is odd to me. I look her up on wikipedia and it notes that she was “a timid Chinese girl who was terrified of defying her traditional father” in regular Sweet Valley High but her character was changed for Senior Year, making her flirtatious cheerleader who lived with her single mom. Good continuity there.
Jessica Wakefield got Jade fired from the House of Java because they were rivals for the affections of Jeremy Aames, who is the quarterback at Big Mesa. They all worked together at the coffee place. Jade won that contest so Jess tried to get even with the firing. Jeremy helps Jade find an interview at a sushi bar. (If I were Chinese the last place I'd want to work would be a sushi bar, you'd get those people who think all Asians look alike asking you about Japan.) But she's happy to have a job and starts hanging out with Jeremy and his sisters.
Jade goes out of her way to rub her relationship with Jeremy in Jessica's face (damn, that's a lot of Js). They spar verbally at school. Jess complains that she can't believe Jeremy would fall for the manipulative Jade. She should've known that since he did date Jessica.
Jeremy's friends at Big Mesa try to convince him to give up on Sweet Valley girls. They think they are all schemers and cheaters. Which is... kinda true. Jeremy exposits that he's not serious about Jade, he's just having fun. Exactly the opposite of what Jade feels. Watch those falling anvils.
We learn that Jade needs this job at the sushi place because her father will not pay child support unless Jade is “pulling her own weight.” That's weird and makes no sense to me. Isn't the point of child support that you support and they are a child? Shrug.
Jade thinks she got the job so she shows up unannounced at Jeremy's house to thank him and give him a present. He, understandably, thinks this is weird. He's beginning to understand that she's not as flippant about the relationship as he is. This is not like her, since she usually dates around.
Jeremy takes Jade to a Big Mesa party and she is very clingy. He thought of it more as a friend-group thing and she's all pissy that they're not spending time alone. She refers to him in her thoughts as her “boyfriend” which is jumping the gun like whoa.
They go out again the next night and Jade makes Jeremy a really dorky card about how much she loves him (as he was joking it was their “anniversary” of 2 weeks). Jeremy also writes a card for Jade and it's awesome:
These have been the best two weeks of my life-or was it three? Whatever. Let's do it again sometime. --J
Jeremy takes Jade to a casual restaurant for their “anniversary.” Jade is confused. She thought anniversaries were supposed to be special and fancy! Nobody clued her onto what the “anni” in “anniversary” stands for I guess. She thinks he's playing a joke on her and is going to take her somewhere nice later, but he doesn't. She really is cookoo for the Cocoa Puffs, eh?
She gives him her creepy-stalker card and he realizes she's serious.
ELIZABETH-CONNOR:
Connor McDermott enters his home to discover all his friends, family and girlfriend (that's Elizabeth) waiting for him. It's an intervention! They want him to stop drinking. He storms out. Liz thinks this is her fault because she said the wrong thing. I think it's probably because he's an alcoholic and I hear they can be a mite unpredictable.
He returns home late that night after they're all gone. He looks for his vodka in his drawer but it's gone, so he finds another bottle in his closet. (He's not an alcoholic though!) In the closet he finds a postcard from his absentee father and decides this is just the perfect time to track him down. He leaves a note for Megan (his sister) saying not to worry. Because notes always work.
Megan, Tia and Elizabeth naturally all freak out. (Connor: But I left a note!)
Liz unloads her self-pitying “it's all my fault” nonsense on Evan Plummer. He must like her or something because he listens to her blather. Later, while she's working, Evan shows up and takes her for ice cream.
Her actual boyfriend (remember him?), is driving to Sticksville, CA looking for his dad. He gets to the town and looks the guy up in the phone book and has some sort of weird crisis when he reads the name “Michael C. McDermott” and realizes he doesn't know what the C stands for. I think I could guess.
Connor decides he doesn't want to deal with his dad tonight so he gets a room and drinks himself to sleep. So, he wakes up hungover, which is a great way to meet your long-lost father.
Back in Sweet Valley, a poem Connor wrote to Liz falls out of her locker and Evan reads it. He must not have any sense of personal boundaries or something because who just reads other people's poetry? Liz starts to cry and Evan hugs her. That's when Andy and Tia show up and they're like “....” The group was planning to get together that night to support each other in these difficult Connor-less times. Evan can't go to the group thing because he has swim practice, so instead he offers to take Liz (and just Liz) to the movies the next day.
Liz thinks this movie can't possible be a date because he's not paying for her. Where's Tia the feminist? Sit that bitch down and explain about going dutch.
Connor, meanwhile, tells his father his mom knows where he is (lie) and suggested he come see Pa (lie). Connor just needs a place to crash. Nothing permanent. Connor thinks it will be awesome to live with Pa because he just needs people to leave him alone. Pa has proven himself the world champ of leaving Connor alone, eleven years running. Seems silly to search out your absentee father so he will leave you alone if he was already doing that.
Tia shows up on Liz's doorstep just as she's about to go to the movie with Evan. Tia is surprised but not overly so and Liz gets defensive and says they're just friends. Then she lets it drop and everyone is happy. Just kidding! Then Liz gets pissy at Tia for even mentioning it, tells her to stop “lecturing” her and so on. Wow, Liz, way to play it cool.
Tia goes to Andy's house to complain. But he awesomely tells her that she wasn't there for him so he doesn't care about her problems. Ha!
Back in Sticksville, Connor's dad is buying him alcohol! They sure do set the parenting bar low in Sweet Valley.
Liz nearly kisses Evan but then she flips out. And scene!
ANDY:
On the way home from the intervention Andy Marsden (who I don't remember) asks Tia (Connor's best friend) if she thinks he ought to tell his parents he's gay. Tia isn't listening; she's worrying about Connor. In fact, none of his friends realize he's having a crisis because they're all too worried about Connor.
Usually those irritating diary entry things of Senior Year bug me. But there's one in here in which Andy talks about watching made for TV movies to learn about coming out. Awesome. Because nothing is more accurate than made for TV movies! Although, I guess, they are very similar to SVH world.
One night, at dinner, his parents ask him if he's planning to take his former girlfriend, Six (the ghostwriters have been watching too much Blossom.) to the homecoming dance. This is awkward because he's gay. And also because they broke up. Oh and because I thought they already had the homecoming dance in #1. Maybe that was just another dance. So many dances, so little time.
At school, Six comes up to Andy after a meeting. She can tell something is wrong with him, and Andy is surprised she noticed because everyone else just wants to talk about Connor. They talk and Six encourages him to come out to his parents, insisting he won't be a disappointment to them just because he's gay.
Finally, Andy comes out to his parents. They are surprised but wish he'd told them sooner. They feel badly he's been keeping it inside or somesuch. They tell him they love him. Everybody hugs. It all feels like a “very special episode” of Sweet Valley High.
MARIA & KEN:
Ken Matthews and Maria Slater are fighting. This confuses me because Maria used to be Winston's girlfriend (nevermind) and in SVH Senior Year #1, Ken was all torn up over Olivia's death. Guess he got over that. Now, Maria says he's all full of himself and flirty with other girls. Dead girlfriend and egotistical? How Patman-esque of him.