Micah’s thoughts about Anita
Most of these were pre ‘Micah’, actually I think they all were but just in case they weren’t I will say it like that.
There are only I think 3 that aren’t Micah talking about Anita.
1. Air- Sometimes right after a gun battle the air shimmers around her and I can’t breathe she is so terrible in her beauty.
2. Apples- Just once she smelled like apples and that was the day that I realized that I really do have a home here.
3. Beginning- In the beginning I stayed with her for the safety she brought; now I stay with her for the safety she seeks.
4. Bugs- It was worth having her threaten to shoot me when I laughed at her for being afraid of bugs.
5. Coffee- If there was just a single word to use to remember her by it would be coffee.
6. Dark- She doesn’t realize it buy some days when it is dark in the room she cries out softly.
7. Despair- When she so coldly turns away from Jean-Claude as he angers her I can feel her despair at hurting him but unable to stop.
8. Doors- She doesn’t realize it but even at home she won’t go through a door until it is flush to the wall.
9. Drink- She doesn’t drink sometimes I wish she would so she could get some of the stress off her shoulders.
10. Duty- Her sense of duty to my people makes me ashamed to call myself their king.
11. Earth- She comes home smelling of the earth and it makes me wish she could run with me.
12. End- I think I will always fear the end of her and I not because I will never see her again but because I will always crave her touch.
13. Fall- I think about falling sometimes just to see if she will catch me, I know she will but the thought that she might not thrills me for some reason.
14. Fire- She stared transfixed at the fireplace whispering softly “It burned her dress first. Mommy why did you leave me?” until I gathered her in my arms and told her there was no fire
15. Flexible- She will never admit it but those exercises yeah, they make her very flexible.
16. Flying- When Jason teased her about being afraid to fly I thought he was joking, when she admitted it I realized she was human- it was almost a let down.
17. Food- Before she moved in with a bunch of cats she barely ate now we fill her kitchen with food the same way she feels our lives with home.
18. Foot- We tried to teach her to dance she says she had two left feet she doesn’t but its cute to watch her stumble so we let her keep saying it.
19. Grave- She is at her best when she is by a grave; she doesn’t even realize it and that’s where the power of it comes from.
20. Green- She buys green shirts to bring out my eyes I don’t think she will ever realize that I wish my eyes were brown again.
21. Head- The first time I lifted her above my head she squealed, it is a memory I will always cherish.
22. Hollow-The first time I saw her I thought I would be hollow inside, when I wasn’t I know I couldn’t betray her.
23. Honor- I wonder, does she realize that by saying that she loves us and honoring her promises to love us and take care of us she has in effect married the whole pard, the better part of the pack and most of the kiss.
24. Hope- The secret of this near marriage is something that we will never tell her, if we do she will run if she doesn’t know then we can all just hope that she will never stop.
25. Light- I quickly learned that there are some things only Jason can get away with, one of those things is telling Anita to ‘Lighten up’.
26. Lost- Sometimes late at night she still cries out for her mother and she sounds like a little girl lost.
27. Metal- When she comes back from the shooting range I can taste metal on her skin very faintly when I kiss her neck.
28. New- When we were new I feared she would bold now when I look in her eyes I realize that she is waiting for me to.
29. Old- When I watch her, at the oddest moments I realize I will have someone to grow old with, it is a humbling feeling.
30. Peace- She struggles to find peace with herself and with all of us I don’t think she will ever really understand that the more she struggles the less peace she will find.
31. Poison- Is it wrong of me to want to thank the lamia for poisoning her?
32. Pretty- Anita thinks she is merely pretty, I think she is delusional.
33. Rain- Nathanial sat in the bedroom and listened to Anita and Micah make love in the shower, the water fell like rain and he smiled knowing that soon they would come to bed and remind him of what it means to be warm and dry.
34. Regret- Sometimes for reasons I will never understand I regret betraying my master for a woman, and then I hate myself for feeling that way.
35. Roses- Jean-Claude always buys her roses so feel like I can’t -or shouldn’t- it is the only time I feel jealousy.
36. Secret- Her feelings for her mother are her deepest held secret, I can understand so are mine.
37. Snakes- “Snakes”, Anita said calmly, “are much scarier when you realize they can turn into people.”
38. Snow- We never play in the snow I want to but I don’t know how to ask her out on a play date.
39. Solid- Cherry told me that when Richard dumped Anita after the ardeur she held on to Cherry like she was the last solid thing in the world, I think that was the first time the pard truly felt they had a queen.
40. Spring- I can’t wait to sit on the front porch and watch the first sunrise of spring with her; I know it will be magical.
41. Stable- Once when she got really upset at her life she called us her stable of man flesh, I was never more thankful for my speed two seconds after I neighed.
42. Strange- It’s strange, looking back on where I was last year I never thought I would be here, I didn’t even think I would be alive-or human if I was alive.
43. Summer- Zombie raisings slow down in the summer which should mean she is home more but crime goes up so she isn’t, it makes me wish she had a normal job.
44. Taboo- For all that she has done and been exposed to the strangest things are still taboo.
45. Ugly- When she denied her true feelings for Nathanial I don’t think I have ever seen such an ugly expression of self loathing pass over someone’s face.
46. War- Watching her fight her own private war with her emotions makes me want to play hero but I know she would never forgive me.
47. Water- The cat in me hates water but my mate loves it so I ignore the hissing as I slid into the water and into her.
48. Welcome- I always wonder if I am going to wear out my welcome but everyday that she doesn’t say a word I think that maybe….just maybe…
49. Winter- She showed me a picture of her as a little girl going out on the first day of winter, she looked like a starfish.
50. Wood- I think she will always have a fire place just she that she can watch Nate and I cut wood, I always want one so I can strip her down in front of it.