(no subject)
Fandom: Primeval
Pairing: Connor Becker/Captain Hilary Becker
Theme set: Alpha
Title: It's All Too Much & Not Enough
Rating: PG-13
Warning[s]: Vague hints towards m/m sexytime?
Notes: Written over two days, I think. The sentences are all connected but the timeline jumps all over the place. Consider them snapshots into different times in a relationship :)
#01 - Comfort
After Nick died there was nothing anyone could do to soothe Connor's pain, but when he sits in front of the artefact every spare second of the day, the soft "he'd be proud of you" from Becker causes the tiniest ghost of a smile to flicker across the seemingly permanently down-turned lips.
#02 - Kiss
Their first kiss isn't sparkles and romance and magic, it's teeth and tongues and be more careful out there, Temple, you're too important to lose and it's Becker and it's Connor and it's perfect.
#03 - Soft
Becker's hands are calloused and rough from years of handling weaponry and it never ceases to amaze Connor how soft and tender those calloused fingers are when they're touching him.
#04 - Pain
Being shot hurts, and God, Connor has never really realised this until he's being carried by strong arms and trying to focus on a slow, Eton-accented voice telling him to Stay with me, Connor, just stay with me.
#05 - Potatoes
Connor thinks it's ridiculous that so much about how well this (not date) dinner will go is riding on his ability to cook potatoes, of all things.
#06 - Rain
It's… it's bloody stupid is what it is, standing outside Becker's apartment in the rain too scared to go in, just in case Becker says 'no', or punches him in the face; all those fears are assuaged when he looks up and sees Becker in the doorway reaching out with a towel and an exasperated expression.
#07 - Chocolate
Connor doesn't worry when Becker takes chocolate to Jess; he understands the way they bonded over that year but it doesn't threaten him, not any more.
#08 - Happiness
A kiss down his neck, a press of lips and teeth against his throat and a soft murmur of his name that sounds like honey reminds Connor that he's so lucky to see this side of the serious soldier-boy and it makes him so happy to be party to be in on that secret.
#09 - Telephone
Connor's a texture, not a telephone caller - he hates the sound of his voice down the line and tends to ramble something ridiculous but he's not surprised that a text conversation and a phone conversation with Becker are much the same: a confirmation of agreed times and dates and little else (and if Becker's feeling particularly daring, occasionally there's a ":)" at the end - on those days Connor feels particularly fluttery and like a teenage girl).
#10 - Ears
Connor has never had sensitive ears until Becker came along and breathed against them, lips brushing over the (apparently sensitive) skin as he whispers words that are for Connor's ears alone.
#11 - Name
Becker says his name in so many different ways, when he's angry or frustrated or worried or annoyed, but Connor's favourite is that fond-but-exasperated tone Becker gets when Connor's fretting unnecessarily about something, like having burned the toast he'd wanted to serve in bed.
#12 - Sensual
When Becker's voice drops, gaining that low, husky tone he gets whenever he and Connor are in private, Connor's blood races and wonders when it became appropriate to have a thing for the sensual, sexy tones of someone's voice.
#13 - Death
Death was never a tangible concept to Connor until he started this job, then he lost Tom and Ryan and Nick and people around them die like they're red shirts in an episode of Star Trek and Connor's terrified that one day it'll be Becker whose body he's carrying, limp and lifeless out of some burning building.
#14 - Sex
It's said that men think about sex every six seconds though Connor would like to respectfully disagree: he thinks about sex every time he looks at Becker and since he sees Becker all the time, his mind pretty much lives in the dirty, sexual gutter.
#15 - Touch
Connor counts it as a bonus when Becker stops tensing every time Connor's hands curl around his shoulders, thumbs digging into the tension that collects at the base of his neck.
#16 - Weakness
They don't consider themselves 'boyfriends' or 'partners' because Connor's too worried about chasing Becker off with the seriousness of a relationship with a co-worker (he's heard somewhere that those things are frowned upon and all), but it's not the serious nature of the words that bothers Becker; it's the chance that someone like Christine Johnson would find out and try and use Connor - as Becker's weakness - against him.
#17 - Tears
Connor doesn't think Becker can cry, which is fine because Connor cries enough for the both of them and finds himself immediately reassured by the rough brush of the pad of Becker's thumb against his cheek and the touch of lips to his forehead and the soft murmur of 'it's alright' before arms come around him and Becker just holds him until the tears stop.
#18 - Speed
Connor's mind always whizzes about from thought to thought without much time to pause but when the creature's so close to Becker and the soldier doesn't have his gun, Connor's mind goes into overdrive and he's standing on a nearby tree stump, waving his hands and yelling because Becker can't die.
#19 - Wind
When Connor's in a car with the window down, his hair's always a mess when it stops, like someone's pushed their fingers through it but Becker's hair's always immaculate (except when Connor's hands are in it and he's pulling and asking and yes, please) and it strikes Connor as just another thing about Becker that's almost too perfect to be human.
#20 - Freedom
Three days leave isn't much but the thought that maybe that's three blessed ARC-free days where Connor will get to see Becker and not Captain Becker and where they'll be able to enjoy all the freedoms that they're not afforded during their working lives.
#21 - Life
After an incursion when the adrenaline's pumping, Connor just needs because when you've watched people die as often as he has, the life that you have and those people in it become even more special and important.
#22 - Jealousy
Becker wonders if he'll ever get over that twist in his chest whenever he sees Connor and Abby together, whether or not he'll ever stop thinking about their bond and whether or not more happened in the past than they've admitted.
#23 - Hands
Connor thinks capability is really sexy and Becker is nothing if not really, really capable, especially when he's disassembling and resembling his weaponry with the same skill and care he takes Connor apart with.
#24 - Taste
It's a well known fact that Connor hates the taste of mint (he even uses kids bubblegum flavoured toothpaste), but weirdly can't get enough of the minty-kisses he gets when he's standing in Becker's kitchen in one of the soldier's old shirts.
#25 - Devotion
Connor knows that Becker's loyal: he's a soldier, it's what they do, and he's not bothered - any more - when Becker's devotion to his job means that when there's an anomaly alert on Saturday afternoon (and Connor's signed off on sick), Becker's getting dressed and leaving because he knows without a shadow of a doubt that he'll come back as soon as he can.
#26 - Forever
Connor has always looked at people and wondered how long it'll take for them to have a burning desire to leave him and so started doing it himself: he looks at Abby and saw five years (and then saw 'best friends', in Caroline he saw maybe a month but with Becker he sees forever and he finds that just the tiniest bit frightening sometimes.
#27 - Blood
Connor has never seen Becker look scared before, but when Connor stumbles out of the building with blood seeping through the fingers pressed against his side and his legs give out, Becker catches him and picks him up and looks terrified.
#28 - Sickness
Sick leave isn't all it's cracked up to be and after two days of it, Connor is bored (though, Becker coming around all the time to not-fuss over him is a delight and something Connor enjoys, if only his side didn't hurt every time he tries to move because that means other forms of entertainment really are not possible).
#29 - Melody
Connor can't sing anything, but he's pleasantly surprised (and surprisingly turned on) when he sees a guitar in the corner of Becker's spartan apartment and asks him to hear a song.
#30 - Star
Connor has been trying to work out what the piece of paper that says 'DO NOT REMOVE' on the inside of his lab door's for for three days now, and when his era-detector device actually works successfully for three anomalies in a row, Becker lets himself in, covers the chart with his body and then leaves with a smirk and a wink in Connor's direction; there's a huge, golden coloured star right in the middle of the paper.
#31 - Home
When they stepped through that anomaly and into their time, Connor knew a year of hoping was worth it, though he didn't feel truly 'home' until he was in a small room with Becker, back at the ARC, getting a tentative hug - in private - from the man he (still) loved.
#32 - Confusion
You shouldn't read into it because it's probably nothing, just a collection of moments but it latches into your mind: Becker hugged Abby first, not you, didn't hug you on your own until back in the privacy of the ARC and you know a year's a long time but you can't help but wonder; what's going on and where do you stand?
#33 - Fear
Connor remembers what fear is: it's that icy sensation that takes hold of you when you least expect it, it's that feeling that crawls up your spine and makes you feel sick when you're fighting future predators and you hear a shout over the comm and it goes dead and you can't raise Becker on the other end.
#34 - Lightning/Thunder
Their partnership is a lot like a storm: at the ARC, Connor makes a lot of noise, but Becker's the one with the firepower, the muscle and the fire and they work really, really well together.
#35 - Bonds
Held hostage by a group of mad human survivors in the very dystopic future they're trying to prevent, Connor tugs at the metal around his wrists, looks at Abby and says "Becker's coming for us," because he is, Connor just… well, he just knows.
#36 - Market
There's a new trilby on Connor's desk and when he lifts it up there's a note underneath in Becker's chicken-scratch handwriting that reads: Saw this at the market, thought it might suit you.
#37 - Technology
Connor knows no one understands his affinity with technology, he's considered a geek or a nerd or whatever but the warm clap against his shoulder from Becker when his latest gadget works (and the rest of the team cheering and looking happy, of course) makes the long hours worth it.
#38 - Gift
It's not even a real present but Becker's gentle kiss to his lips in the lab in the middle of the day coupled with the quiet Happy Birthday Connor is the best gift Connor Temple gets that year.
#39 - Smile
Becker doesn't smile much at the ARC unless it's to sort of mock someone, so when his lips do curl into a smile that's just for Connor in private or not it makes Connor's stomach do flip flops.
#40 - Innocence
Connor believes in the inherent good of the world: he doesn't immediately think that people are bad and Becker - along with everyone else in the ARC - do their best to protect him from the harsher realities or at least distract him when Real Life tries to puncture the little bubble that Connor calls 'reality'.
#41 - Completion
There's little more satisfying than finally completing a tricky gadget and bringing yourself one step closer to being the inventor/super hero sidekick you'd always dreams of being, or at least, so you thought, before he came into your life.
#42 - Clouds
The look Becker gives Connor right before giving in is priceless when Connor announces that they have five minutes to spare to do some cloud spotting: the anomaly's locked and they're not going anywhere… right?
#43 - Sky
Their cloud spotting is cut short by a shadow moving across the sky and Connor doesn't think 'danger' so much as he thinks 'Becker's touching me again'.
#44 - Heaven
Dreaming of coffee and warmth and a guy who can kill you in 26 different ways and take you apart so completely with a touch and a smile is the closest to Heaven that Connor can imagine.
#45 - Hell
Waking up to find that he's still trapped in the Cretaceous and there's still no sign of the anomaly reappearing reminds Connor that he's still trapped in Hell and it's all he can to to keep hoping, though the mere action gets harder and harder with each passing day.
#46 - Sun
Connor often wakes up alone, with the sun peeking in through the slanted blinds and the cooling spot on the bed where Becker had been lying, knowing that the soldier needs the early morning run to clear his head and set the tone for the day.
#47 - Moon
The moon, Connor thinks, highlights the things that are often missed in the sharper light of day: for example the freckles on the curve of Becker's shoulders.
#48 - Waves
Connor's never the type to make waves intentionally, but when Becker's grabbing the back of his neck and forcing him to duck so they can hide from the man with a gun Connor's just pissed off, he can't help but be a little amused.
#49 - Hair
Connor's weirdly obsessed with the short trail of dark hair that makes up Becker's happy trail; God only knows why because Connor doesn't usually find that sort of thing attractive but Becker's breaking all of his rules.
#50 - Supernova
He remembers his father, sort of, a man with an explosive temper that bordered on supernova when he was angry but the ghostly memories he has of loud noises are nothing compared to the Captain when he finds out what happened to Connor and Abby when they were being held captive in the future.
Pairing: Connor Becker/Captain Hilary Becker
Theme set: Alpha
Title: It's All Too Much & Not Enough
Rating: PG-13
Warning[s]: Vague hints towards m/m sexytime?
Notes: Written over two days, I think. The sentences are all connected but the timeline jumps all over the place. Consider them snapshots into different times in a relationship :)
#01 - Comfort
After Nick died there was nothing anyone could do to soothe Connor's pain, but when he sits in front of the artefact every spare second of the day, the soft "he'd be proud of you" from Becker causes the tiniest ghost of a smile to flicker across the seemingly permanently down-turned lips.
#02 - Kiss
Their first kiss isn't sparkles and romance and magic, it's teeth and tongues and be more careful out there, Temple, you're too important to lose and it's Becker and it's Connor and it's perfect.
#03 - Soft
Becker's hands are calloused and rough from years of handling weaponry and it never ceases to amaze Connor how soft and tender those calloused fingers are when they're touching him.
#04 - Pain
Being shot hurts, and God, Connor has never really realised this until he's being carried by strong arms and trying to focus on a slow, Eton-accented voice telling him to Stay with me, Connor, just stay with me.
#05 - Potatoes
Connor thinks it's ridiculous that so much about how well this (not date) dinner will go is riding on his ability to cook potatoes, of all things.
#06 - Rain
It's… it's bloody stupid is what it is, standing outside Becker's apartment in the rain too scared to go in, just in case Becker says 'no', or punches him in the face; all those fears are assuaged when he looks up and sees Becker in the doorway reaching out with a towel and an exasperated expression.
#07 - Chocolate
Connor doesn't worry when Becker takes chocolate to Jess; he understands the way they bonded over that year but it doesn't threaten him, not any more.
#08 - Happiness
A kiss down his neck, a press of lips and teeth against his throat and a soft murmur of his name that sounds like honey reminds Connor that he's so lucky to see this side of the serious soldier-boy and it makes him so happy to be party to be in on that secret.
#09 - Telephone
Connor's a texture, not a telephone caller - he hates the sound of his voice down the line and tends to ramble something ridiculous but he's not surprised that a text conversation and a phone conversation with Becker are much the same: a confirmation of agreed times and dates and little else (and if Becker's feeling particularly daring, occasionally there's a ":)" at the end - on those days Connor feels particularly fluttery and like a teenage girl).
#10 - Ears
Connor has never had sensitive ears until Becker came along and breathed against them, lips brushing over the (apparently sensitive) skin as he whispers words that are for Connor's ears alone.
#11 - Name
Becker says his name in so many different ways, when he's angry or frustrated or worried or annoyed, but Connor's favourite is that fond-but-exasperated tone Becker gets when Connor's fretting unnecessarily about something, like having burned the toast he'd wanted to serve in bed.
#12 - Sensual
When Becker's voice drops, gaining that low, husky tone he gets whenever he and Connor are in private, Connor's blood races and wonders when it became appropriate to have a thing for the sensual, sexy tones of someone's voice.
#13 - Death
Death was never a tangible concept to Connor until he started this job, then he lost Tom and Ryan and Nick and people around them die like they're red shirts in an episode of Star Trek and Connor's terrified that one day it'll be Becker whose body he's carrying, limp and lifeless out of some burning building.
#14 - Sex
It's said that men think about sex every six seconds though Connor would like to respectfully disagree: he thinks about sex every time he looks at Becker and since he sees Becker all the time, his mind pretty much lives in the dirty, sexual gutter.
#15 - Touch
Connor counts it as a bonus when Becker stops tensing every time Connor's hands curl around his shoulders, thumbs digging into the tension that collects at the base of his neck.
#16 - Weakness
They don't consider themselves 'boyfriends' or 'partners' because Connor's too worried about chasing Becker off with the seriousness of a relationship with a co-worker (he's heard somewhere that those things are frowned upon and all), but it's not the serious nature of the words that bothers Becker; it's the chance that someone like Christine Johnson would find out and try and use Connor - as Becker's weakness - against him.
#17 - Tears
Connor doesn't think Becker can cry, which is fine because Connor cries enough for the both of them and finds himself immediately reassured by the rough brush of the pad of Becker's thumb against his cheek and the touch of lips to his forehead and the soft murmur of 'it's alright' before arms come around him and Becker just holds him until the tears stop.
#18 - Speed
Connor's mind always whizzes about from thought to thought without much time to pause but when the creature's so close to Becker and the soldier doesn't have his gun, Connor's mind goes into overdrive and he's standing on a nearby tree stump, waving his hands and yelling because Becker can't die.
#19 - Wind
When Connor's in a car with the window down, his hair's always a mess when it stops, like someone's pushed their fingers through it but Becker's hair's always immaculate (except when Connor's hands are in it and he's pulling and asking and yes, please) and it strikes Connor as just another thing about Becker that's almost too perfect to be human.
#20 - Freedom
Three days leave isn't much but the thought that maybe that's three blessed ARC-free days where Connor will get to see Becker and not Captain Becker and where they'll be able to enjoy all the freedoms that they're not afforded during their working lives.
#21 - Life
After an incursion when the adrenaline's pumping, Connor just needs because when you've watched people die as often as he has, the life that you have and those people in it become even more special and important.
#22 - Jealousy
Becker wonders if he'll ever get over that twist in his chest whenever he sees Connor and Abby together, whether or not he'll ever stop thinking about their bond and whether or not more happened in the past than they've admitted.
#23 - Hands
Connor thinks capability is really sexy and Becker is nothing if not really, really capable, especially when he's disassembling and resembling his weaponry with the same skill and care he takes Connor apart with.
#24 - Taste
It's a well known fact that Connor hates the taste of mint (he even uses kids bubblegum flavoured toothpaste), but weirdly can't get enough of the minty-kisses he gets when he's standing in Becker's kitchen in one of the soldier's old shirts.
#25 - Devotion
Connor knows that Becker's loyal: he's a soldier, it's what they do, and he's not bothered - any more - when Becker's devotion to his job means that when there's an anomaly alert on Saturday afternoon (and Connor's signed off on sick), Becker's getting dressed and leaving because he knows without a shadow of a doubt that he'll come back as soon as he can.
#26 - Forever
Connor has always looked at people and wondered how long it'll take for them to have a burning desire to leave him and so started doing it himself: he looks at Abby and saw five years (and then saw 'best friends', in Caroline he saw maybe a month but with Becker he sees forever and he finds that just the tiniest bit frightening sometimes.
#27 - Blood
Connor has never seen Becker look scared before, but when Connor stumbles out of the building with blood seeping through the fingers pressed against his side and his legs give out, Becker catches him and picks him up and looks terrified.
#28 - Sickness
Sick leave isn't all it's cracked up to be and after two days of it, Connor is bored (though, Becker coming around all the time to not-fuss over him is a delight and something Connor enjoys, if only his side didn't hurt every time he tries to move because that means other forms of entertainment really are not possible).
#29 - Melody
Connor can't sing anything, but he's pleasantly surprised (and surprisingly turned on) when he sees a guitar in the corner of Becker's spartan apartment and asks him to hear a song.
#30 - Star
Connor has been trying to work out what the piece of paper that says 'DO NOT REMOVE' on the inside of his lab door's for for three days now, and when his era-detector device actually works successfully for three anomalies in a row, Becker lets himself in, covers the chart with his body and then leaves with a smirk and a wink in Connor's direction; there's a huge, golden coloured star right in the middle of the paper.
#31 - Home
When they stepped through that anomaly and into their time, Connor knew a year of hoping was worth it, though he didn't feel truly 'home' until he was in a small room with Becker, back at the ARC, getting a tentative hug - in private - from the man he (still) loved.
#32 - Confusion
You shouldn't read into it because it's probably nothing, just a collection of moments but it latches into your mind: Becker hugged Abby first, not you, didn't hug you on your own until back in the privacy of the ARC and you know a year's a long time but you can't help but wonder; what's going on and where do you stand?
#33 - Fear
Connor remembers what fear is: it's that icy sensation that takes hold of you when you least expect it, it's that feeling that crawls up your spine and makes you feel sick when you're fighting future predators and you hear a shout over the comm and it goes dead and you can't raise Becker on the other end.
#34 - Lightning/Thunder
Their partnership is a lot like a storm: at the ARC, Connor makes a lot of noise, but Becker's the one with the firepower, the muscle and the fire and they work really, really well together.
#35 - Bonds
Held hostage by a group of mad human survivors in the very dystopic future they're trying to prevent, Connor tugs at the metal around his wrists, looks at Abby and says "Becker's coming for us," because he is, Connor just… well, he just knows.
#36 - Market
There's a new trilby on Connor's desk and when he lifts it up there's a note underneath in Becker's chicken-scratch handwriting that reads: Saw this at the market, thought it might suit you.
#37 - Technology
Connor knows no one understands his affinity with technology, he's considered a geek or a nerd or whatever but the warm clap against his shoulder from Becker when his latest gadget works (and the rest of the team cheering and looking happy, of course) makes the long hours worth it.
#38 - Gift
It's not even a real present but Becker's gentle kiss to his lips in the lab in the middle of the day coupled with the quiet Happy Birthday Connor is the best gift Connor Temple gets that year.
#39 - Smile
Becker doesn't smile much at the ARC unless it's to sort of mock someone, so when his lips do curl into a smile that's just for Connor in private or not it makes Connor's stomach do flip flops.
#40 - Innocence
Connor believes in the inherent good of the world: he doesn't immediately think that people are bad and Becker - along with everyone else in the ARC - do their best to protect him from the harsher realities or at least distract him when Real Life tries to puncture the little bubble that Connor calls 'reality'.
#41 - Completion
There's little more satisfying than finally completing a tricky gadget and bringing yourself one step closer to being the inventor/super hero sidekick you'd always dreams of being, or at least, so you thought, before he came into your life.
#42 - Clouds
The look Becker gives Connor right before giving in is priceless when Connor announces that they have five minutes to spare to do some cloud spotting: the anomaly's locked and they're not going anywhere… right?
#43 - Sky
Their cloud spotting is cut short by a shadow moving across the sky and Connor doesn't think 'danger' so much as he thinks 'Becker's touching me again'.
#44 - Heaven
Dreaming of coffee and warmth and a guy who can kill you in 26 different ways and take you apart so completely with a touch and a smile is the closest to Heaven that Connor can imagine.
#45 - Hell
Waking up to find that he's still trapped in the Cretaceous and there's still no sign of the anomaly reappearing reminds Connor that he's still trapped in Hell and it's all he can to to keep hoping, though the mere action gets harder and harder with each passing day.
#46 - Sun
Connor often wakes up alone, with the sun peeking in through the slanted blinds and the cooling spot on the bed where Becker had been lying, knowing that the soldier needs the early morning run to clear his head and set the tone for the day.
#47 - Moon
The moon, Connor thinks, highlights the things that are often missed in the sharper light of day: for example the freckles on the curve of Becker's shoulders.
#48 - Waves
Connor's never the type to make waves intentionally, but when Becker's grabbing the back of his neck and forcing him to duck so they can hide from the man with a gun Connor's just pissed off, he can't help but be a little amused.
#49 - Hair
Connor's weirdly obsessed with the short trail of dark hair that makes up Becker's happy trail; God only knows why because Connor doesn't usually find that sort of thing attractive but Becker's breaking all of his rules.
#50 - Supernova
He remembers his father, sort of, a man with an explosive temper that bordered on supernova when he was angry but the ghostly memories he has of loud noises are nothing compared to the Captain when he finds out what happened to Connor and Abby when they were being held captive in the future.