thought until death meant my fears were safe within...
Fandom: Crossover; Final Fantasy IX / Advent Children
Pairing: Kuja x Kadaj
Theme set: Alpha
Rating: NC-17, to be safe, although that only applies to a few. The themes that contain content of a sexual nature will be in red.
For information's sake...
- Cross-posted at toubousha_darin, iono_tearflail@GJ, and ffh_ooc@GJ.
- Because this pairing originated in an RP community on GJ, all themes can be assumed to be set in a highschool AU. ♥
- Not in chronological order; I'm lazy, so I'll leave you to puzzle it out yourself. If you ask really nicely, though, I might rearrange them.
- I went out on a limb with a lot of these themes; if you don't get the connection, feel free to ask.
- Kuja has a chronic illness that attacks the immune system, and is prone to almost-deadly coughing fits, which (as of late) can only be stopped by injection.
- Yes, Kadaj is a kink.
- There are brief arcs in a few places: #18 - 21, #29 & 30, #43 & 44.
- I hate #5. Mostly because I can so easily see the scene playing out surrounding it. Kadaj is going through the cabinet, talking about foodsex... oh, God.
- I also hate #3. I swear, it's Kuja-mun's fault. And it will NEVER HAPPEN in the RP.
#01 - Comfort
Luckily, the comfort Kadaj drew from the fragrance was far stronger than the guilt of listening to Kuja complain about the missing bottle.
#02 - Kiss
As the taller boy touched his nose lightly to Kadaj's, Kadaj scrunched up his face and giggled, draping his arms over his boyfriend's shoulders.
#03 - Soft
Even as Kuja touched him soothingly, Kadaj confessed in a hushed tone, "I don't know what's wrong, either, and -- and... I'm sorry; I just... I wish I could fix it, just like that."
#04 - Pain
Kuja's breath caught in his throat, and he leaned heavily on the counter, wondering hazily which was worse -- the searing pain in his chest, or the stab to his heart knowing that this would be another precious night with Kadaj ruined by this damn sickness.
#05 - Potatoes (That's right, the 'Potatoes' theme involves sex. Be afraid.)
"Those are disgusting," cried Kuja upon the sight of the instant mashed potato box, sounding horrified, "and I'll neither eat them, nor have any kind of sex involving them."
#06 - Rain
"Forget your hair, Kuj'," Kadaj crowed, pulling on the blue-eyed boy's hand, "the rain is pouring, baby, and I want to ruin your makeup so damn bad."
#07 - Chocolate
Muscles convulsed beneath his delicate, doll-like hands as he gently pressed the chocolate kiss against Kadaj's opening, pushing it in until it vanished, and his tongue met flesh.
#08 - Happiness
It was a bit of a jolt for poor Kuja, realizing that 'happiness' was no longer defined as 'getting my way,' but more often as 'getting Kadaj's way.'
#09 - Telephone
Kadaj realised, as silence reclaimed the small, echoey bathroom, and the heat yielded to detumescence, that he had to have woken up his brothers; he confessed as much, laughingly, to the boy on the line.
#10 - Ears
"Kuja," whispered the younger boy warningly, shrugging his shoulder to try to ward off his darling's discomposing kisses.
#11 - Name
From Kadaj's biology papers, one had to wonder if Kuja's name was actually spelled "♥♥Kuja♥."
#12 - Sensual
A little thrill trickled down Kadaj's spine at Kuja's parting words -- how promising.
#13 - Death
Even the reaper had to step away when Kadaj held the sickly boy so tightly.
#14 - Sex
After a lengthy tugging on his wrist, Kadaj leaned down to the little girl pointing at his lover, and she promptly asked him, "Is that a girl or a boy?" in such a suspicious way that Kadaj couldn't help but burst out laughing.
#15 - Touch
Though he would tolerate the 'silly peacocks'' bubbly embraces and affection, he made it a point to remind Kadaj, through narrowed eyes and tensed jaw, that he was very displeased with the lengths he had to go to in order to please him.
#16 - Weakness
"I'll watch all of Season Two of Xena with you," Kadaj coaxed, his voice approaching a whine.
#17 - Tears
It was oft-abused leverage, the threat that Kadaj might cry; he knew all too well that it would get him whatever he pleased.
#18 - Speed
Everything wound down to a crawl, and Kuja could suddenly feel, with overwhelming intensity, every one of Kadaj's strands of hair brushing against his hips and thighs.
#19 - Wind
With this dizzying sensitivity, the next few seconds had him suspended, teetering on the edge of a deluge, the muscles of his stomach tensing like a wind-up rubber band toy.
#20 - Freedom
But inevitably, the laws of physics took hold, and the figurative band snapped, sending him sailing through the air, bottomless and diaphanous.
#21 - Life
Could he have, he'd have remained there, soaring for the rest of his life, if only because it was Kadaj who put him there.
#22 - Jealousy
More often than not, Kadaj found himself pleased with his beau's obvious (though Kuja tried so hard to hide it) jealousy -- all it took was Kadaj flashing a smile, touching a cheek or a hand, or aiming a wink at another boy, and Kuja was positively bristling.
#23 - Hands
The buttons defied Kuja in his fumbling exhaustion, and as ridiculous as it was, he was on the verge of tears when his lover's hands finally intervened, gently and patiently working each button loose from its hold.
#24 - Taste
"Stop that!" Kuja scolded -- Kadaj looked undeniably adorable, licking that eggbeater clean... but Kuja hoped the boy got salmonella for his troubles.
#25 - Devotion
As the digits on the clock came into focus, it struck Kuja that his boyfriend must have been with him all day, and well into the next night.
#26 - Forever
The irony, that he would writhe in pseudo-agony until the metal cuffs cut into his wrists, making for scars that would last longer than their relationship would.
#27 - Blood
There was something terrifying about bright red on stark white, and years later, when Kuja was a rarely-visited memory, Kadaj still wouldn't be able to shake the sick feeling he got when he saw it.
#28 - Sickness
More than one night together deteriorated into mindless coughing on Kuja's part, but Kadaj told him, time and again, that an evening spent cradling Kuja in his arms after a lifesaving injection was just as precious as a night of rampant lovemaking.
#29 - Melody
With the next song that came on the radio, the pillow did little to muffle his sobbing, but more to catch his tears; he thought faintly and disgustedly what a wretch he was.
#30 - Star
More disgusting than even that was how he found a way to relate everything to Kadaj, from the radio to the weather to the television, like the boy still held the leading role in Kuja's damned life.
#31 - Home
Never in his life had Kadaj wanted more to be away from the people he called his family, away from home -- he'd have traded all of it right then for simple forgiveness.
#32 - Confusion
Lifting his eyelids was a chore, after an injection-induced night of rest, and engaging his brain was no easier -- Kuja could swear he was wearing the clothes he wore all day yesterday... but Kadaj wouldn't dare put him to bed in his street clothes... right?
#33 - Fear
Having to administer the injections pained Kadaj; the inherent terror in Kuja's eyes at the sight of the needle struck straight to his heart.
#34 - Lightning/Thunder
The smallest clap of thunder could send one of them bolting for the nearest cover, for his hair's sake, and the other into peals of laughter at his baby's distress.
#35 - Bonds
Despite the glaring red marks he knew he was inflicting on himself, Kuja couldn't help twisting his wrists about in the leather straps -- the vinyl-clad minx at his feet was smiling most maddeningly, and Kuja wasn't sure if he wanted his hands free to reprimand or recompense.
#36 - Market
Saccharine-sweet, Kadaj relinquished the pillow, falling back on the bed with an expression that might have been endearing, if not for the brazen glint in his eye -- a deliberate pitch for his arousal.
#37 - Technology
Kadaj could hardly believe his baby had agreed to this, especially at work -- he was clearly fighting for composure, and the poor customer, while it was obvious that something was amiss, would never have pinned a remote-controlled anal vibrator as the suspect.
#38 - Gift
"You really shouldn't have, Kadaj," Kuja protested, even as his eyes outright shone at the boxes beneath the torn wrapping paper, "I -- ... is this the director's cut?"
#39 - Smile
Try as he might, Kuja could never feign anger when his beryl-eyed beaut smiled like that.
#40 - Innocence
Even though Kadaj's innocence had never been his to take, Kuja found all too often that there was enough left to salvage that it could break his heart in an instant.
#41 - Completion
"There," Kuja said complacently, and shut the textbook only just in time to field a flying tackle from his darling, who had so obediently been waiting at the end of the bed.
#42 - Clouds
There was a sort of epiphany that afternoon; a wakeup call -- when you were looking up at the clouds, and thinking your boyfriend's hair was softer, you were in deep.
#43 - Sky
One night, as Kuja was falling fast into medication-induced sleep, Kadaj told him solemnly that he saw the sky in his eyes.
#44 - Heaven
Though exhausted, Kuja's response was reverent and fond -- "Then Heaven must be green, baby."
#45 - Hell
By definition, Kuja thought, Hell was the biting pain in his lungs that would leave him helpless in Kadaj's aegis yet another night.
#46 - Sun
Kadaj had always assumed that, as beautiful as Kuja accused him of being, Kuja himself was not dazzled by his beauty -- the same way that the gods must see the sun as just another bright star.
#47 - Moon
He was such a bitch when he was awake, Kadaj reflected, but asleep like this, he was turned translucent by moonlight, and there was nothing, no barriers or walls erected to obstruct Kadaj's view of his soul.
#48 - Waves
Though far more pleasant than goodbyes, hellos still paled in comparison to the secretive, fleeting glances they shared across the classroom, and the half-shy wave Kadaj would give as he tucked his hair behind his ear.
#49 - Hair
There were times when Kuja wondered, sighing, if Kadaj was worth the trouble -- like the afternoons when he opened the door after four long hours cosseting his hair, only to have the younger boy bury his hands in it and destroy such invaluable work in the blink of an eye... and maliciously, no less.
#50 - Supernova
He was choking on the very air that filled the room, sickly-sweet as it was, and staring down at his breathtaking baby, he sobbed again -- even like this, Kuja was so goddamned beautiful it hurt; more radiant than ever in his own fading light, like a violently dying star.
Pairing: Kuja x Kadaj
Theme set: Alpha
Rating: NC-17, to be safe, although that only applies to a few. The themes that contain content of a sexual nature will be in red.
For information's sake...
- Cross-posted at toubousha_darin, iono_tearflail@GJ, and ffh_ooc@GJ.
- Because this pairing originated in an RP community on GJ, all themes can be assumed to be set in a highschool AU. ♥
- Not in chronological order; I'm lazy, so I'll leave you to puzzle it out yourself. If you ask really nicely, though, I might rearrange them.
- I went out on a limb with a lot of these themes; if you don't get the connection, feel free to ask.
- Kuja has a chronic illness that attacks the immune system, and is prone to almost-deadly coughing fits, which (as of late) can only be stopped by injection.
- Yes, Kadaj is a kink.
- There are brief arcs in a few places: #18 - 21, #29 & 30, #43 & 44.
- I hate #5. Mostly because I can so easily see the scene playing out surrounding it. Kadaj is going through the cabinet, talking about foodsex... oh, God.
- I also hate #3. I swear, it's Kuja-mun's fault. And it will NEVER HAPPEN in the RP.
#01 - Comfort
Luckily, the comfort Kadaj drew from the fragrance was far stronger than the guilt of listening to Kuja complain about the missing bottle.
#02 - Kiss
As the taller boy touched his nose lightly to Kadaj's, Kadaj scrunched up his face and giggled, draping his arms over his boyfriend's shoulders.
#03 - Soft
Even as Kuja touched him soothingly, Kadaj confessed in a hushed tone, "I don't know what's wrong, either, and -- and... I'm sorry; I just... I wish I could fix it, just like that."
#04 - Pain
Kuja's breath caught in his throat, and he leaned heavily on the counter, wondering hazily which was worse -- the searing pain in his chest, or the stab to his heart knowing that this would be another precious night with Kadaj ruined by this damn sickness.
#05 - Potatoes (That's right, the 'Potatoes' theme involves sex. Be afraid.)
"Those are disgusting," cried Kuja upon the sight of the instant mashed potato box, sounding horrified, "and I'll neither eat them, nor have any kind of sex involving them."
#06 - Rain
"Forget your hair, Kuj'," Kadaj crowed, pulling on the blue-eyed boy's hand, "the rain is pouring, baby, and I want to ruin your makeup so damn bad."
#07 - Chocolate
Muscles convulsed beneath his delicate, doll-like hands as he gently pressed the chocolate kiss against Kadaj's opening, pushing it in until it vanished, and his tongue met flesh.
#08 - Happiness
It was a bit of a jolt for poor Kuja, realizing that 'happiness' was no longer defined as 'getting my way,' but more often as 'getting Kadaj's way.'
#09 - Telephone
Kadaj realised, as silence reclaimed the small, echoey bathroom, and the heat yielded to detumescence, that he had to have woken up his brothers; he confessed as much, laughingly, to the boy on the line.
#10 - Ears
"Kuja," whispered the younger boy warningly, shrugging his shoulder to try to ward off his darling's discomposing kisses.
#11 - Name
From Kadaj's biology papers, one had to wonder if Kuja's name was actually spelled "♥♥Kuja♥."
#12 - Sensual
A little thrill trickled down Kadaj's spine at Kuja's parting words -- how promising.
#13 - Death
Even the reaper had to step away when Kadaj held the sickly boy so tightly.
#14 - Sex
After a lengthy tugging on his wrist, Kadaj leaned down to the little girl pointing at his lover, and she promptly asked him, "Is that a girl or a boy?" in such a suspicious way that Kadaj couldn't help but burst out laughing.
#15 - Touch
Though he would tolerate the 'silly peacocks'' bubbly embraces and affection, he made it a point to remind Kadaj, through narrowed eyes and tensed jaw, that he was very displeased with the lengths he had to go to in order to please him.
#16 - Weakness
"I'll watch all of Season Two of Xena with you," Kadaj coaxed, his voice approaching a whine.
#17 - Tears
It was oft-abused leverage, the threat that Kadaj might cry; he knew all too well that it would get him whatever he pleased.
#18 - Speed
Everything wound down to a crawl, and Kuja could suddenly feel, with overwhelming intensity, every one of Kadaj's strands of hair brushing against his hips and thighs.
#19 - Wind
With this dizzying sensitivity, the next few seconds had him suspended, teetering on the edge of a deluge, the muscles of his stomach tensing like a wind-up rubber band toy.
#20 - Freedom
But inevitably, the laws of physics took hold, and the figurative band snapped, sending him sailing through the air, bottomless and diaphanous.
#21 - Life
Could he have, he'd have remained there, soaring for the rest of his life, if only because it was Kadaj who put him there.
#22 - Jealousy
More often than not, Kadaj found himself pleased with his beau's obvious (though Kuja tried so hard to hide it) jealousy -- all it took was Kadaj flashing a smile, touching a cheek or a hand, or aiming a wink at another boy, and Kuja was positively bristling.
#23 - Hands
The buttons defied Kuja in his fumbling exhaustion, and as ridiculous as it was, he was on the verge of tears when his lover's hands finally intervened, gently and patiently working each button loose from its hold.
#24 - Taste
"Stop that!" Kuja scolded -- Kadaj looked undeniably adorable, licking that eggbeater clean... but Kuja hoped the boy got salmonella for his troubles.
#25 - Devotion
As the digits on the clock came into focus, it struck Kuja that his boyfriend must have been with him all day, and well into the next night.
#26 - Forever
The irony, that he would writhe in pseudo-agony until the metal cuffs cut into his wrists, making for scars that would last longer than their relationship would.
#27 - Blood
There was something terrifying about bright red on stark white, and years later, when Kuja was a rarely-visited memory, Kadaj still wouldn't be able to shake the sick feeling he got when he saw it.
#28 - Sickness
More than one night together deteriorated into mindless coughing on Kuja's part, but Kadaj told him, time and again, that an evening spent cradling Kuja in his arms after a lifesaving injection was just as precious as a night of rampant lovemaking.
#29 - Melody
With the next song that came on the radio, the pillow did little to muffle his sobbing, but more to catch his tears; he thought faintly and disgustedly what a wretch he was.
#30 - Star
More disgusting than even that was how he found a way to relate everything to Kadaj, from the radio to the weather to the television, like the boy still held the leading role in Kuja's damned life.
#31 - Home
Never in his life had Kadaj wanted more to be away from the people he called his family, away from home -- he'd have traded all of it right then for simple forgiveness.
#32 - Confusion
Lifting his eyelids was a chore, after an injection-induced night of rest, and engaging his brain was no easier -- Kuja could swear he was wearing the clothes he wore all day yesterday... but Kadaj wouldn't dare put him to bed in his street clothes... right?
#33 - Fear
Having to administer the injections pained Kadaj; the inherent terror in Kuja's eyes at the sight of the needle struck straight to his heart.
#34 - Lightning/Thunder
The smallest clap of thunder could send one of them bolting for the nearest cover, for his hair's sake, and the other into peals of laughter at his baby's distress.
#35 - Bonds
Despite the glaring red marks he knew he was inflicting on himself, Kuja couldn't help twisting his wrists about in the leather straps -- the vinyl-clad minx at his feet was smiling most maddeningly, and Kuja wasn't sure if he wanted his hands free to reprimand or recompense.
#36 - Market
Saccharine-sweet, Kadaj relinquished the pillow, falling back on the bed with an expression that might have been endearing, if not for the brazen glint in his eye -- a deliberate pitch for his arousal.
#37 - Technology
Kadaj could hardly believe his baby had agreed to this, especially at work -- he was clearly fighting for composure, and the poor customer, while it was obvious that something was amiss, would never have pinned a remote-controlled anal vibrator as the suspect.
#38 - Gift
"You really shouldn't have, Kadaj," Kuja protested, even as his eyes outright shone at the boxes beneath the torn wrapping paper, "I -- ... is this the director's cut?"
#39 - Smile
Try as he might, Kuja could never feign anger when his beryl-eyed beaut smiled like that.
#40 - Innocence
Even though Kadaj's innocence had never been his to take, Kuja found all too often that there was enough left to salvage that it could break his heart in an instant.
#41 - Completion
"There," Kuja said complacently, and shut the textbook only just in time to field a flying tackle from his darling, who had so obediently been waiting at the end of the bed.
#42 - Clouds
There was a sort of epiphany that afternoon; a wakeup call -- when you were looking up at the clouds, and thinking your boyfriend's hair was softer, you were in deep.
#43 - Sky
One night, as Kuja was falling fast into medication-induced sleep, Kadaj told him solemnly that he saw the sky in his eyes.
#44 - Heaven
Though exhausted, Kuja's response was reverent and fond -- "Then Heaven must be green, baby."
#45 - Hell
By definition, Kuja thought, Hell was the biting pain in his lungs that would leave him helpless in Kadaj's aegis yet another night.
#46 - Sun
Kadaj had always assumed that, as beautiful as Kuja accused him of being, Kuja himself was not dazzled by his beauty -- the same way that the gods must see the sun as just another bright star.
#47 - Moon
He was such a bitch when he was awake, Kadaj reflected, but asleep like this, he was turned translucent by moonlight, and there was nothing, no barriers or walls erected to obstruct Kadaj's view of his soul.
#48 - Waves
Though far more pleasant than goodbyes, hellos still paled in comparison to the secretive, fleeting glances they shared across the classroom, and the half-shy wave Kadaj would give as he tucked his hair behind his ear.
#49 - Hair
There were times when Kuja wondered, sighing, if Kadaj was worth the trouble -- like the afternoons when he opened the door after four long hours cosseting his hair, only to have the younger boy bury his hands in it and destroy such invaluable work in the blink of an eye... and maliciously, no less.
#50 - Supernova
He was choking on the very air that filled the room, sickly-sweet as it was, and staring down at his breathtaking baby, he sobbed again -- even like this, Kuja was so goddamned beautiful it hurt; more radiant than ever in his own fading light, like a violently dying star.