It's good, a good topic. It's a poem right? I like how you use actual quotes in it, it makes it more personal and real. More detailed, that's nice to see. I like the repetition of the "faking" and "shaking" lines - it has a musical quality. I think in the first stanza though, the lines are a bit too long, they don't flow - although the imagery is really good. Maybe if you break the lines and make the one stanza into two it would flow a bit better. (For example the last line could be: "but that is a lie to what we hold in faith") But yeah I like it, good job :)
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"but that is a lie
to what we hold in faith")
But yeah I like it, good job :)
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