Autumn
Title: Autumn
Pairing: TaengSic ft. SooFany
Rating PG13
Disclaimer: It's fiction
Chapter 5: Closer
“Bye!”
“You sure you don’t need us to send you up?”
“It’s alright Soo, there’s light from the garage. Someone must be in there, don’t worry.”
SooYoung, whose head was out of the window, cast a glance towards the garage that has the shutter rolled down halfway, showing the brightly lit place at the lower half only.
“Well, just go ahead and enter, Soo and I will leave once you go in safely.”
SooYoung nodded her head at Tiffany’s words while returning her attention to Jessica that was standing in front of her with a few shopping bags in her hands. Jessica heaved a sigh and rolled her eyes at her friends’ overreaction.
“Bye! Drive safely and have a safe trip back to your hometown. Thanks for today!”
She straightened her body and give both of them a wave before turning around.
“Jess! Remember to get a genealogy by this week ok?”
“I will. Bye!”
SooYoung and Tiffany waved goodbye from inside the car and Jessica continued her way towards the garage, where the staircase leading to Taeyeon’s apartment was allocated beside it. As she was nearing the staircase, a loud clank startled her and she stopped in her tracks before looking over the garage warily. Biting her lips in confusion, Jessica shrugged slightly, thinking that it may be some workers that had dropped something in the process of repairing the cars. However, a second loud clanking sound changed her thoughts. Furrowing her eyebrows, Jessica decided to enter the garage to have a look. She raised her hands and pulled the shutter down a little before releasing it, allowing the shutter rolled noisily back up. Jessica then turned her head back and saw SooYoung’s car still over there, both of them looking back at her with confusion and she saw SooYoung’s hand on top of the door where the window was completely rolled down, knowing the younger girl is ready to come out anytime should anything bad happens.
Jessica gave them a slight smile before turning her head back to the garage and looked around carefully.
“Anybody there?”
She called out softly and took a few small steps inside the garage, but there was no reply.
“Hello? Anybody there?”
A low rolling sound echoed in the garage followed by a stomping sound of boots. Jessica blinked her eyes nervously and took a step back unconsciously as she glanced at the area where the sound came from.
“W - who’s that?”
Jessica called out loudly, trying not to show her nervousness out but failed apparently from the slight stuttering. Her eyes widened when a head showed up from between the cars at the left side and took a few steps back when she saw someone walking out.
“SooYeon?”
She heaved a sigh of relief when Taeyeon appeared from between the cars with a face of innocence and a spanner in a hand.
“Hey…”
Taeyeon looked at her with a pair of big round eyes before smiling a little.
“You’re back.”
Jessica nodded her head and turned to look out of the garage where she saw SooYoung waving her a goodbye and rolled up the window before driving off.
“SooYoung sent me back.”
Jessica pointed to leaving car and Taeyeon followed her finger, managing to catch the tail of the black Mercedes before it disappeared around the corner.
“Why are you still working at this timing? Where are the rest?”
Jessica asked as she walked nearer to the older girl, trying to get more warmth from the heated garage and watched as Taeyeon let out a tired huff before walking back in between the two cars.
“A customer called last minute before closing to ask if he can get his car back tomorrow as he needs it urgently so… I’ve no choice.”
“You can tell him you’re closing already.”
“Well… it wasn’t much left to his car so I thought why not? He needs it urgently and I’ve the time to spare.”
Jessica shook her head slightly at Taeyeon’s response. She’s still the same, always placing people in front of herself and tries too hard to be her best. Jessica placed the shopping bags on the ground and crouched down; hugging her knees as she watched Taeyeon lay back on the wooden board and pushed herself back under the car.
“But you no longer had the energy.”
She heard a small struggling sound coming from underneath the car and couldn’t help but smile widely at the cute sound.
“There’s… still… a little… bit… left.”
Taeyeon’s struggled response came from under the car and Jessica went silent at it. She doesn’t know why but a wave of nostalgic hits her all of a sudden. Hearing Taeyeon’s voice so close to her and having Taeyeon within her reach seems so surreal to her. She couldn’t even remember when the last time she conversed with Taeyeon so comfortably was and she doesn’t know why she is conversing with Taeyeon right now, when all she wanted was to stay far away from the latter.
Jessica shook her head at her thoughts and turned her head to stare at the bumper of the car in front of the one Taeyeon’s working on right now. She then saw the rolled up shutter and remembered something.
“You should’ve shut the shutter completely.”
“What?”
“You should’ve shut the shutter completely. It’s dangerous to leave the garage open when you’re the only one here.”
“I have it closed halfway.”
Taeyeon’s voice was loud and clear and it made Jessica turned her head back, only to find that Taeyeon had pushed herself out from under the car and their eyes met.
Both were stiff frozen as they looked into each other’s eyes. They were unreadable to each other. They were all dark and sad like the vast of ocean in the middle of the night. The only brightness they both have was the light from the garage. It was suffocating for both of them because they remembered vividly that it was once bright and glint in happiness when they looked at each other in the past.
What happened?
What exactly happened?
Jessica doesn’t know what happened to Taeyeon’s.
Taeyeon felt her heart aching at Jessica’s.
She wanted it back badly. She wanted the bright and happy eyes she loves to see in the past badly. She wanted the pair of eyes that she couldn’t get tired of at all because she knew everytime she stared into Jessica’s eyes in the past, she could felt her own shining brightly too.
She wants it back.
She wants her SooYeon back.
But before she could get any glimpse of SooYeon in the pair of sad and dark eyes, it shifted and she loses it all over again.
“I - I’m tired.”
Jessica muttered out softly as she broke their eye contact and stood up slowly. It was too much of her to see the pair of sad eyes staring back into her, screaming ‘help’ to her and having her own heart and mind chanting ‘love her’, ‘love her’ to herself.
“You should rest early too, Taeyeon. Good night.”
Jessica said as she picked up her shopping bags, avoiding looking at the older girl at all.
“SooYeon?”
Jessica stopped in her tracks when she heard Taeyeon calling out to her softly.
“A - are you free tomorrow?”
She spun around slowly and looked at Taeyeon warily, defenses up again when she thought of what Taeyeon might be insinuating. No way, there’s no way Jessica is going to cave in and let herself fall back into that pitiful state again.
“What do you want?”
Jessica asked coldly. She didn’t mean to, but she couldn’t help when her defenses are all up.
Taeyeon clenched her teeth at the cold tone, masking her hurt as she lowered her head, knowing all of a sudden how much she has really hurt the younger girl in the past. And honestly, it felt like a huge slap to her face.
“N - nothing. I - I got you a genealogist and I thought of bringing you to her tomorrow, that’s if, you’re free.”
Taeyeon replied softly and Jessica’s stance weakened as she realized how harsh she has been.
“Oh. Okay. I’m free… what time will it be?”
“2 in the afternoon, but it will be an hour drive so we have to get ready by 12.30pm.”
Jessica nodded her head and let her eyes lingered at the defeated form of Taeyeon that was still staring at the ground.
Damn Taeyeon being weak and pitiful right now.
Damn Taeyeon being her weakness.
Damn Taeyeon and her heart.
Damn her heart.
Jessica found herself squatting back down to Taeyeon’s side and reaching out a hand to place on Taeyeon’s black and dirty ones.
“I’m sorry Taeyeon. I don’t mean too. I’m sorry and thanks for finding me a genealogist.”
Taeyeon stared at the pair of slim and manicured hand on top of hers and once again, realized how she really missed the warm and feeling of Jessica’s hand on hers. She felt guilt eating her up once again and tears welled up in her eyes.
She shook her head and shut her eyes tightly before whispering lightly, still not looking up at Jessica.
“I should be the one that says sorry, SooYeon. I’m sorry.”
Jessica swallowed down the lump in her throat when she knew what Taeyeon was apologizing for and retracted her hand back slowly.
“You didn’t know… you didn’t know… so it’s okay.”
“It’s not okay. I hurt you SooYeon! I hurt you when I should be fucking love you!”
Taeyeon spat out bitterly and regretfully as she finally raised her head to stare at the younger girl with tears rolling down on her cheeks. She breathed in heavily and let her tears flow down freely when she saw the younger girl crying too.
“SooYeon…”
“Don’t.”
Jessica choked out as she took a few steps back and shook her head vigorously. No, she’s not ready yet. She’s not ready at all.
“SooYeon…”
“Don’t. Please.”
Jessica begged with cries and inhaled deeply before running out of the garage and up the apartment, leaving Taeyeon all alone in there, bawling her eyes out as all the pain that she suppressed for three years surged out uncontrollably.
“I’m sorry SooYeon… I’m sorry… I - I love you… I re - really do…”
-
She woke up the next day, nearing eleven in the morning feeling tired and her eyes hurts from the crying she had from the previous night. Blearily, she sat up on her bed and stared into the spaces for a moment while waiting for her brain to jumpstart, thinking about what happened yesterday night. A few clinking sounds from outside followed by shuffling of feet finally woke her up. She turned to the side and swung her legs down to the floor but before she could do anything, a wave of sickness hit her and she found herself rushing out of her room and down to the bathroom located at the end of the hallway. Once again, she found herself hugging the toilet bowl as she tried her best to eject whatever was upsetting her stomach. It had been weeks since the morning sickness started and Jessica knew she was nowhere near to getting used of this routine when she was crying and sobbing.
“Hey, it’s alright. It’s alright.”
A soft whisper sounded in her ears before a soft warm hand was felt on her forehead.
“It’s horrible.”
Jessica choked out helplessly as she leaned into Taeyeon’s touch and belched for a few more time.
Vulnerability always made one weak and weakness always made one honest. Jessica realized this during the second time Taeyeon stayed beside her during her morning sickness. And as much as she wanted to deny this, she really enjoyed the attention Taeyeon showered her during her morning sickness. And this is the only time she allowed herself to let down her defenses and permit Taeyeon to be in her space.
“I know. Now, take a deep breath first.”
Taeyeon’s hand was on her back, rubbing it up and down, trying to ease Jessica’s belching.
“It sucks, Taeyeon. I don’t want this anymore.”
She heard Taeyeon chuckled softly before her face was cleaned by a wet towel gently.
“But you want the child.”
Taeyeon replied her gently and Jessica pouted, still feeling miserable and uncomfortable from the vomiting.
“When will this go away?”
Jessica glanced at Taeyeon’s face while the older girl was still cleaning her face gently with the wet towel.
“I’m… not sure. It really depends… probably one or two months later?”
Taeyeon replied with a frown before helping Jessica to stand up. She then washed the towel and hung it back to the rack before turning around to face Jessica who was holding a toothbrush in one hand while feeling her slightly bulging tummy with another.
“SooYeon?”
The younger girl was chewing on her lips, a habit that Taeyeon knew she was pondering on something.
“Do you think the baby is fine? Am I not taking good care of it? I - I heard that people will have cravings when they are pregnant because the baby wants to eat that food but… I don’t have. I only have morning sickness… does that means the baby is rejecting all the food that I had taken?”
Taeyeon laughed out loud before shaking her head at Jessica’s question. She then smiled her charming smile with that little side chin dimple that always got Jessica mesmerized by it.
“The little one is doing perfectly fine, SooYeon. Morning sickness is common to all pregnant ladies and as for food craving, it depends. Some have it and some don’t have it and it doesn’t matter as long as you rest well and have ensured you eat for three meals.”
Jessica blushed and looked away from Taeyeon, choosing to stare at the mirror before slowly asking her next question.
“Am I eating well for the baby now? I ate three meals every day.”
Strangely, Taeyeon’s smile faltered when she heard Jessica’s question. It sounded so helpless and innocent at the same time that Taeyeon felt that she did not do well enough to take care of her SooYeon. She failed to pay more attention to her only love and it made her guiltier than ever. She swallowed the lump in her throat before reaching out one of her hand to tuck Jessica’s hair behind her ear.
“No.”
She whispered hoarsely and caught Jessica flinching a little at her touch. Retracting her hand back, Taeyeon cleared her throat before staring at Jessica with a pair of eyes filled with love and apology.
“It’s not enough SooYeon. You need more nutrition meals than those take - outs or the baby and you will not grow healthily. You need to drink milk twice a day and you - you need to be happy.”
She watched as Jessica hung her head down and stared at the counter top with creased eyebrow, thinking hard and trying to digest what Taeyeon had said and it looked absolutely cute and adorable to Taeyeon.
With a small smile, Taeyeon decided to throw caution to the wind and reached forward to comb Jessica’s tresses back with her hand before planting a soft kiss on Jessica’s temple.
“I’m here SooYeon, you may not want to hear this but I had to say it out. I’m here and I’ll never leave you alone. I’ll be here with you until the little one is out. I - I can help to take care of the little one with you and I - I… I will love you forever. Even if you don’t love me anymore, it’s fine. Just remember I’ll love you forever and be with you until you find someone better and leave. So, don’t worry okay?”
Taeyeon inhaled deeply before stepping out of the bathroom and closed the door gently, returning the privacy back to Jessica before leaning against the door and exhaled raggedly.
With the door in between and the sound of the water rushing, both of them missed out the tears that rolled down their own cheeks and the cries of each other’s heart.
Screaming loudly, desperately wanting to be heard.
I still love you.
I’ll always love you.
-
Taeyeon and Jessica left the house at the said time and walked towards the nearby bus stop that will bring them out of this little town to the city. The little walking trip was quiet and awkward. Jessica had no idea where they are heading to and could only depend on Taeyeon leading her. It was cold, due to the late winter days and her hands were freezing up despite having a thick winter coat on and sticking her hands into the pockets. She glanced to her side and watched as Taeyeon walked beside her, seemly unfazed by the cold and she couldn’t help but pout a little. Taeyeon has always loved the cold seasons as far as she could remember while on the other hand, she had never really loved winter season because of the extreme coldness. Yet, she remembered how she enjoyed winter season in the past, when she was with Taeyeon, because the older girl always keeps her warm as much as she could, even warmer than Dan could.
She heaved a soft sigh at the memories. Memories, something that haunts her endlessly and something that she wished she could have locked it away or lost it, especially those with Taeyeon and those with Dan.
Two different people, two different types of memories but all ended up with the similar pain in her. Images flashed across her mind vividly. Back to five years ago, where how she and Taeyeon met and their friendship started. Back to four years ago where she found out that she has fall for Taeyeon, where both of them started to act like a couple, or behave like a couple, from the words of people around them and well, it felt the same for Jessica too. But slowly, things fall apart. They were never even close to being being a couple because all along, someone else was in Taeyeon’s heart.
All long, she never held a place in Taeyeon’s life and she never meant anything to Taeyeon. The older girl had a lover all along.
Way before they met. Way before they were friends. Way before she falls in love with Taeyeon.
And she never knew. Taeyeon had never mentioned it either.
Everything was just a lie. Taeyeon merely played along with it. Until three years ago, she caught Taeyeon and her lover, back in their dorm, in Taeyeon’s room, on Taeyeon’s bed. Just when she has finally mustered out her courage to confess to the older girl on her birthday and Jessica could not deny what a big present she has gotten for that year. Two weeks later, unable to suppress the pain anymore, Jessica chose to left without a word.
Heaving a big sigh, she turned her head away from the front and stared at the road on her left, watching the cars driving carefully on the icy road.
“Are you cold?”
Taeyeon’s voice broke her thoughts and she shook her head slightly, refusing to look at the older girl.
“Are you hungry?”
Once again, she shook her head and chose to stare at the pavement she was walking on. She heard Taeyeon sigh softly beside her but ignored it.
“Sooyeon!”
The next thing she knew after Taeyeon’s sudden call, she was being pulled to a side and thrown into a familiar embrace. Stunned by the sudden action, Jessica could only freeze in Taeyeon’s embrace before being pushed away lightly. Taeyeon’s worried face was the next thing in her view.
“You… you should really kick the habit of walking with your head down. Do you know you almost bump into the lamp post?”
Jessica blinked twice before turning her head back and true to Taeyeon’s words, a lamp post was only a few inches before them. Taeyeon let out a soft sigh again before moving forward with Jessica in her embrace and stuck her hand into Jessica’s pocket to hold onto the younger’s girl hand. She frowned when she realized that Jessica’s hand was freezing cold and gritting her teeth, she pulled out Jessica’s hand before pushing both of their hands back into her own pocket.
“I can walk on my own.”
Jessica spoke out and struggled to retract her hand back from Taeyeon’s grip but the older girl was stronger.
“And have you bump into another lamp post further down the road with the addition of having your hand turning into ice? No way. I am going to hold your hand and lead you all the way whether you like it or not. You should know me by now Sooyeon. I mean what I said.”
Taeyeon retorted back and tightened her grip on Jessica’s hand before continuing walking down to the bus stop, ignoring Jessica’s tiny struggle in her pocket and the glares that were given to her all the way. She couldn’t care anything else except for Jessica’s safety and the fact that the younger girl’s hand is warming up in her grasp. Furthermore, she was used to this tiny bicker that they used to have years ago.
Albeit a little saddening, Taeyeon felt happy that she could relieve these moments once more like the past.
“The bus is here. C’mon.”
Taeyeon spoke out gently and squeezed Jessica’s hand a little before hastening her pace to chase after the bus that is slowing down.
A small smile crept on her face when she realized Jessica had stopped struggling and in return, tightened the grip around their hands.
-
“Hi, I’m Dr. Yuri, Kwon. Your future genealogist but I guess you can call me Yuri since you’re Taeyeon’s friend.”
Jessica nodded her head slightly at the tanned lady in front of her and fidgeted a little in her seat. The doctor was friendly, no doubt, but Jessica couldn’t help but feel uncomfortable. She has never like hospital and it doesn’t help with the fact that she’s coming to check on her baby for the first time. Lots of negative thoughts appeared in her mind and she was worried about her child. She feared for the worst and frankly speaking, Jessica would run away immediately if she has the choice but she couldn’t for the sake of her baby.
“So… I am going to give you a check up and to see if both you and the baby are healthy. Is that alright?”
Yuri asked with a soft smile and stole a glance at Taeyeon who was sitting behind on the couch that was in her room. She could see that the brunette was nervous and uncomfortable so she decided to take things slowly first.
“Okay. Let’s start with a simple conversation to calm you down a little.”
Yuri spoke out and smiled brightly when the older girl returned her with a small shy smile, her eyes gleamed with appreciation at the understanding from the doctor.
“How old is the baby in your tummy now?”
“Going to three months.”
“That’s good! You can see the baby and probably the gender soon too.”
“Really?”
“Mhmm. Excited aren’t we? So, do you have any preference of gender?”
Jessica thought for a while before replying softly.
“No… I don’t think I really had a preference of gender. As long as the baby is healthy, I will be very happy.”
“True, health is the most essential thing for everyone. Speaking of health! How are you feeling nowadays?”
“I’m fine.”
“Eating well?”
“Yes.”
“Really well?”
Yuri reaffirmed again with a pair of teasing eyes and Jessica stalled for a moment before biting her lower lips and glanced a little to her side where Taeyeon was sitting behind.
“I think so?”
Yuri, who was observing Jessica, caught on her little act and nodded her head slightly.
“Well, think so isn’t enough. So, how about we do the check up now and then, we’ll see how we can further improve from here?”
“Okay.”
Finally, Yuri thought and with a smile, she stood up and guided the older girl to the corner where a genealogy chair and other instruments were placed. Jessica followed her but stopped in her tracks when she realized that she is going to let Yuri touch her body and she felt uncomfortable even if she is a doctor. She heard the curtains being drawn closed and she flinched, turning around with a panic and scared expression that had Yuri raised an eyebrow.
“Is there anything wrong?”
Jessica couldn’t reply at all. She was inexperienced and she felt as if she was suffocating under Yuri’s stare and what is Yuri going to do and what she would find out about the baby and her. The stress was weighing on her shoulders and she felt like breaking down. Which, she did and she felt embarrassed for the fact that she was crying for such trivial thing but she could not control her emotions.
Yuri, on the other hand, was more than surprised at the sudden breakdown. However, with her years of experiences in this career, she was trained to be calm and well, she certainly has seen more than this.
Gently, she approached Jessica and smiled softly at the older girl.
“Taeyeon?”
She asked Jessica softly and watched as the older girl nodded her head furiously at the said name. Petting the chair behind Jessica, she signaled for the girl to take a seat before pulling the curtain open and called out to the older girl.
“Tae, I think she’d appreciate if you’re beside her.”
Without any hesitation, Taeyeon jumped on her feet and scurried over to Jessica worriedly.
“Sooyeon, what’s wrong?”
Jessica shook her head as she leaned into Taeyeon’s touch on her forehead and wrapped her arms around the older girl’s waist.
“She’s probably nervous since it’s her first time. You should stay beside her.”
Yuri commented as she re-entered the corner and closed the curtain once again.
“Okay, I’m here. I’m here, hmm?”
Taeyeon muttered softly against Jessica’s head and slowly pushed the girl to lie on the chair before taking a seat beside her. Gently, she slipped her left hand into Jessica’s left hand and gripped it lightly while the other hand went above to caress the younger girls’ forehead with her thumb.
“Ready?”
Jessica nodded her head slowly and tightened her grip around Taeyeon’s hand when Yuri lifted her shirt up and pressed around her slightly bulging tummy with her gloved hands.
The check up took more than fifteen minutes as Yuri noticed that there are a lot of things than both the older girls are unaware of. She had to explain all of them in details and seeing that it was the first time Jessica is looking at her baby through the ultrasound, she allow the younger girl to view it a little longer and basked in the happiness of being a mother soon. Needless to say, Taeyeon was excited as well, based on the big smile and sparkling eyes she had on her face.
“Now Ms Jung, I’ll ask my nurse to print out your baby ultrasound for you to have it as a keepsake but now, we’ve to talk on your health.”
Yuri started off once Jessica tidied up her outfit and took a seat beside her working desk. She flipped through her file and compared it with the current health state information she had taken just now and couldn’t help but frown.
“As we know of your health history, should you want to keep this baby and give birth to it, there are a lot of aspects to be taken care of. Let me put your heart condition aside first and concentrate on your basic health condition.”
Yuri spoke and looked at Jessica who was staring back at her with a worried expression.
“As much as I hate to say this, you’re currently underweight and having slight low blood pressure. This is a big no during pregnancy considering your heart condition. I’d need you to eat more healthily and try to eat less take outs. Please do drink three glass of milk instead of two everyday for your own and the baby sake. Just in case, your body doesn’t get the nutrition you need from the food. I’ll prescribe the milk formula for you and you’d to purchase it from here. Adding on, I would need you to come in every month and if you feel uncomfortable or unwell anywhere, please come back to me as soon as possible.”
Yuri continued while scribbling on her paper and paused for a moment before speaking up again.
“We’re more likely to encourage pregnant lady to have exercise as usual to be healthy and it helps to have a smoother delivery but then again, there’s not a need for strenuous activities. A walk around the park for half to an hour a day would be enough or you could do some Yoga as exercise. Try to relax yourself and stay happy too okay? The later part of the pregnancy would not be easy so you have to take things lightly hmm?”
Jessica nodded her head at the instructions she was given and Yuri gave her a bright smile before leaning back against her chair.
“If you’re feeling unwell anywhere, please do inform Taeyeon too. Especially regarding your heart conditions and well, I’m not sure how the both of you would plan but it would be the best if you let Taeyeon to keep track of you and the baby’s heartbeat every day.”
“My baby’s heartbeat? Do you mean…”
Jessica asked carefully and worried spread across her face rapidly.
“Yes, I’m afraid so Ms. Jung. Heart conditions are usually inheritable and we can’t deny the possibility of your child having it too.”
Jessica felt her heart sank at the announcement. She was so caught up with the sadness that this fact had never crossed her mind before.
“But, don’t worry about it that much okay? For now, your baby is healthy. We just have to make sure you are too and hope for the best okay? So, all you have to do is concentrate on being healthy, happy and take care of yourself.”
Jessica nodded her head hesitantly and forced herself to return Yuri a smile before leaving the room with Taeyeon tagging behind.
“Don’t worry too much okay? Stay happy and just don’t think of all the negative things. Think of happy things and everything will be fine.”
Jessica turned her head sideway to look at Taeyeon who was sitting beside her at the reception area.
“Everything?”
For once, she wants to believe in Taeyeon that everything will be alright.
Taeyeon found herself staring into a pair of scared and lost eyes and found her heart aching for it. With a smile charming smile, Taeyeon placed her hand above Jessica’s and whispered lightly.
“Everything, even if it isn’t in the end, I’ll make sure everything is fine as long as I’m here.”
With that, Taeyeon stood up and went over to the counter to pay the bills and milk formula when Jessica’s name was called shortly after her words of assurance.
Jessica stared at Taeyeon’s back view and once again, a lump was formed it her throat and she found it hard to swallow it down. How she wished she could believe in Taeyeon.
She really wishes that she could believe in Taeyeon.
The older girl turned around and flashed another small smile before walking towards her, slipped her hand into hers and held it tightly before pulling her up and walked out of the genealogy department.
At that moment, Jessica allowed herself to return the tight grip and let herself believe in Taeyeon.
Just like how she had always believed her.
Always.
A/N: This chapter seemed to be a little weird and off. I'm not sure why though. Anyway, sorry for the late update, I'd my reasons and not excuses this time round. Sorry and hope you enjoy. Will proofread when I had the time! Thanks.
Pairing: TaengSic ft. SooFany
Rating PG13
Disclaimer: It's fiction
Chapter 5: Closer
“Bye!”
“You sure you don’t need us to send you up?”
“It’s alright Soo, there’s light from the garage. Someone must be in there, don’t worry.”
SooYoung, whose head was out of the window, cast a glance towards the garage that has the shutter rolled down halfway, showing the brightly lit place at the lower half only.
“Well, just go ahead and enter, Soo and I will leave once you go in safely.”
SooYoung nodded her head at Tiffany’s words while returning her attention to Jessica that was standing in front of her with a few shopping bags in her hands. Jessica heaved a sigh and rolled her eyes at her friends’ overreaction.
“Bye! Drive safely and have a safe trip back to your hometown. Thanks for today!”
She straightened her body and give both of them a wave before turning around.
“Jess! Remember to get a genealogy by this week ok?”
“I will. Bye!”
SooYoung and Tiffany waved goodbye from inside the car and Jessica continued her way towards the garage, where the staircase leading to Taeyeon’s apartment was allocated beside it. As she was nearing the staircase, a loud clank startled her and she stopped in her tracks before looking over the garage warily. Biting her lips in confusion, Jessica shrugged slightly, thinking that it may be some workers that had dropped something in the process of repairing the cars. However, a second loud clanking sound changed her thoughts. Furrowing her eyebrows, Jessica decided to enter the garage to have a look. She raised her hands and pulled the shutter down a little before releasing it, allowing the shutter rolled noisily back up. Jessica then turned her head back and saw SooYoung’s car still over there, both of them looking back at her with confusion and she saw SooYoung’s hand on top of the door where the window was completely rolled down, knowing the younger girl is ready to come out anytime should anything bad happens.
Jessica gave them a slight smile before turning her head back to the garage and looked around carefully.
“Anybody there?”
She called out softly and took a few small steps inside the garage, but there was no reply.
“Hello? Anybody there?”
A low rolling sound echoed in the garage followed by a stomping sound of boots. Jessica blinked her eyes nervously and took a step back unconsciously as she glanced at the area where the sound came from.
“W - who’s that?”
Jessica called out loudly, trying not to show her nervousness out but failed apparently from the slight stuttering. Her eyes widened when a head showed up from between the cars at the left side and took a few steps back when she saw someone walking out.
“SooYeon?”
She heaved a sigh of relief when Taeyeon appeared from between the cars with a face of innocence and a spanner in a hand.
“Hey…”
Taeyeon looked at her with a pair of big round eyes before smiling a little.
“You’re back.”
Jessica nodded her head and turned to look out of the garage where she saw SooYoung waving her a goodbye and rolled up the window before driving off.
“SooYoung sent me back.”
Jessica pointed to leaving car and Taeyeon followed her finger, managing to catch the tail of the black Mercedes before it disappeared around the corner.
“Why are you still working at this timing? Where are the rest?”
Jessica asked as she walked nearer to the older girl, trying to get more warmth from the heated garage and watched as Taeyeon let out a tired huff before walking back in between the two cars.
“A customer called last minute before closing to ask if he can get his car back tomorrow as he needs it urgently so… I’ve no choice.”
“You can tell him you’re closing already.”
“Well… it wasn’t much left to his car so I thought why not? He needs it urgently and I’ve the time to spare.”
Jessica shook her head slightly at Taeyeon’s response. She’s still the same, always placing people in front of herself and tries too hard to be her best. Jessica placed the shopping bags on the ground and crouched down; hugging her knees as she watched Taeyeon lay back on the wooden board and pushed herself back under the car.
“But you no longer had the energy.”
She heard a small struggling sound coming from underneath the car and couldn’t help but smile widely at the cute sound.
“There’s… still… a little… bit… left.”
Taeyeon’s struggled response came from under the car and Jessica went silent at it. She doesn’t know why but a wave of nostalgic hits her all of a sudden. Hearing Taeyeon’s voice so close to her and having Taeyeon within her reach seems so surreal to her. She couldn’t even remember when the last time she conversed with Taeyeon so comfortably was and she doesn’t know why she is conversing with Taeyeon right now, when all she wanted was to stay far away from the latter.
Jessica shook her head at her thoughts and turned her head to stare at the bumper of the car in front of the one Taeyeon’s working on right now. She then saw the rolled up shutter and remembered something.
“You should’ve shut the shutter completely.”
“What?”
“You should’ve shut the shutter completely. It’s dangerous to leave the garage open when you’re the only one here.”
“I have it closed halfway.”
Taeyeon’s voice was loud and clear and it made Jessica turned her head back, only to find that Taeyeon had pushed herself out from under the car and their eyes met.
Both were stiff frozen as they looked into each other’s eyes. They were unreadable to each other. They were all dark and sad like the vast of ocean in the middle of the night. The only brightness they both have was the light from the garage. It was suffocating for both of them because they remembered vividly that it was once bright and glint in happiness when they looked at each other in the past.
What happened?
What exactly happened?
Jessica doesn’t know what happened to Taeyeon’s.
Taeyeon felt her heart aching at Jessica’s.
She wanted it back badly. She wanted the bright and happy eyes she loves to see in the past badly. She wanted the pair of eyes that she couldn’t get tired of at all because she knew everytime she stared into Jessica’s eyes in the past, she could felt her own shining brightly too.
She wants it back.
She wants her SooYeon back.
But before she could get any glimpse of SooYeon in the pair of sad and dark eyes, it shifted and she loses it all over again.
“I - I’m tired.”
Jessica muttered out softly as she broke their eye contact and stood up slowly. It was too much of her to see the pair of sad eyes staring back into her, screaming ‘help’ to her and having her own heart and mind chanting ‘love her’, ‘love her’ to herself.
“You should rest early too, Taeyeon. Good night.”
Jessica said as she picked up her shopping bags, avoiding looking at the older girl at all.
“SooYeon?”
Jessica stopped in her tracks when she heard Taeyeon calling out to her softly.
“A - are you free tomorrow?”
She spun around slowly and looked at Taeyeon warily, defenses up again when she thought of what Taeyeon might be insinuating. No way, there’s no way Jessica is going to cave in and let herself fall back into that pitiful state again.
“What do you want?”
Jessica asked coldly. She didn’t mean to, but she couldn’t help when her defenses are all up.
Taeyeon clenched her teeth at the cold tone, masking her hurt as she lowered her head, knowing all of a sudden how much she has really hurt the younger girl in the past. And honestly, it felt like a huge slap to her face.
“N - nothing. I - I got you a genealogist and I thought of bringing you to her tomorrow, that’s if, you’re free.”
Taeyeon replied softly and Jessica’s stance weakened as she realized how harsh she has been.
“Oh. Okay. I’m free… what time will it be?”
“2 in the afternoon, but it will be an hour drive so we have to get ready by 12.30pm.”
Jessica nodded her head and let her eyes lingered at the defeated form of Taeyeon that was still staring at the ground.
Damn Taeyeon being weak and pitiful right now.
Damn Taeyeon being her weakness.
Damn Taeyeon and her heart.
Damn her heart.
Jessica found herself squatting back down to Taeyeon’s side and reaching out a hand to place on Taeyeon’s black and dirty ones.
“I’m sorry Taeyeon. I don’t mean too. I’m sorry and thanks for finding me a genealogist.”
Taeyeon stared at the pair of slim and manicured hand on top of hers and once again, realized how she really missed the warm and feeling of Jessica’s hand on hers. She felt guilt eating her up once again and tears welled up in her eyes.
She shook her head and shut her eyes tightly before whispering lightly, still not looking up at Jessica.
“I should be the one that says sorry, SooYeon. I’m sorry.”
Jessica swallowed down the lump in her throat when she knew what Taeyeon was apologizing for and retracted her hand back slowly.
“You didn’t know… you didn’t know… so it’s okay.”
“It’s not okay. I hurt you SooYeon! I hurt you when I should be fucking love you!”
Taeyeon spat out bitterly and regretfully as she finally raised her head to stare at the younger girl with tears rolling down on her cheeks. She breathed in heavily and let her tears flow down freely when she saw the younger girl crying too.
“SooYeon…”
“Don’t.”
Jessica choked out as she took a few steps back and shook her head vigorously. No, she’s not ready yet. She’s not ready at all.
“SooYeon…”
“Don’t. Please.”
Jessica begged with cries and inhaled deeply before running out of the garage and up the apartment, leaving Taeyeon all alone in there, bawling her eyes out as all the pain that she suppressed for three years surged out uncontrollably.
“I’m sorry SooYeon… I’m sorry… I - I love you… I re - really do…”
-
She woke up the next day, nearing eleven in the morning feeling tired and her eyes hurts from the crying she had from the previous night. Blearily, she sat up on her bed and stared into the spaces for a moment while waiting for her brain to jumpstart, thinking about what happened yesterday night. A few clinking sounds from outside followed by shuffling of feet finally woke her up. She turned to the side and swung her legs down to the floor but before she could do anything, a wave of sickness hit her and she found herself rushing out of her room and down to the bathroom located at the end of the hallway. Once again, she found herself hugging the toilet bowl as she tried her best to eject whatever was upsetting her stomach. It had been weeks since the morning sickness started and Jessica knew she was nowhere near to getting used of this routine when she was crying and sobbing.
“Hey, it’s alright. It’s alright.”
A soft whisper sounded in her ears before a soft warm hand was felt on her forehead.
“It’s horrible.”
Jessica choked out helplessly as she leaned into Taeyeon’s touch and belched for a few more time.
Vulnerability always made one weak and weakness always made one honest. Jessica realized this during the second time Taeyeon stayed beside her during her morning sickness. And as much as she wanted to deny this, she really enjoyed the attention Taeyeon showered her during her morning sickness. And this is the only time she allowed herself to let down her defenses and permit Taeyeon to be in her space.
“I know. Now, take a deep breath first.”
Taeyeon’s hand was on her back, rubbing it up and down, trying to ease Jessica’s belching.
“It sucks, Taeyeon. I don’t want this anymore.”
She heard Taeyeon chuckled softly before her face was cleaned by a wet towel gently.
“But you want the child.”
Taeyeon replied her gently and Jessica pouted, still feeling miserable and uncomfortable from the vomiting.
“When will this go away?”
Jessica glanced at Taeyeon’s face while the older girl was still cleaning her face gently with the wet towel.
“I’m… not sure. It really depends… probably one or two months later?”
Taeyeon replied with a frown before helping Jessica to stand up. She then washed the towel and hung it back to the rack before turning around to face Jessica who was holding a toothbrush in one hand while feeling her slightly bulging tummy with another.
“SooYeon?”
The younger girl was chewing on her lips, a habit that Taeyeon knew she was pondering on something.
“Do you think the baby is fine? Am I not taking good care of it? I - I heard that people will have cravings when they are pregnant because the baby wants to eat that food but… I don’t have. I only have morning sickness… does that means the baby is rejecting all the food that I had taken?”
Taeyeon laughed out loud before shaking her head at Jessica’s question. She then smiled her charming smile with that little side chin dimple that always got Jessica mesmerized by it.
“The little one is doing perfectly fine, SooYeon. Morning sickness is common to all pregnant ladies and as for food craving, it depends. Some have it and some don’t have it and it doesn’t matter as long as you rest well and have ensured you eat for three meals.”
Jessica blushed and looked away from Taeyeon, choosing to stare at the mirror before slowly asking her next question.
“Am I eating well for the baby now? I ate three meals every day.”
Strangely, Taeyeon’s smile faltered when she heard Jessica’s question. It sounded so helpless and innocent at the same time that Taeyeon felt that she did not do well enough to take care of her SooYeon. She failed to pay more attention to her only love and it made her guiltier than ever. She swallowed the lump in her throat before reaching out one of her hand to tuck Jessica’s hair behind her ear.
“No.”
She whispered hoarsely and caught Jessica flinching a little at her touch. Retracting her hand back, Taeyeon cleared her throat before staring at Jessica with a pair of eyes filled with love and apology.
“It’s not enough SooYeon. You need more nutrition meals than those take - outs or the baby and you will not grow healthily. You need to drink milk twice a day and you - you need to be happy.”
She watched as Jessica hung her head down and stared at the counter top with creased eyebrow, thinking hard and trying to digest what Taeyeon had said and it looked absolutely cute and adorable to Taeyeon.
With a small smile, Taeyeon decided to throw caution to the wind and reached forward to comb Jessica’s tresses back with her hand before planting a soft kiss on Jessica’s temple.
“I’m here SooYeon, you may not want to hear this but I had to say it out. I’m here and I’ll never leave you alone. I’ll be here with you until the little one is out. I - I can help to take care of the little one with you and I - I… I will love you forever. Even if you don’t love me anymore, it’s fine. Just remember I’ll love you forever and be with you until you find someone better and leave. So, don’t worry okay?”
Taeyeon inhaled deeply before stepping out of the bathroom and closed the door gently, returning the privacy back to Jessica before leaning against the door and exhaled raggedly.
With the door in between and the sound of the water rushing, both of them missed out the tears that rolled down their own cheeks and the cries of each other’s heart.
Screaming loudly, desperately wanting to be heard.
I still love you.
I’ll always love you.
-
Taeyeon and Jessica left the house at the said time and walked towards the nearby bus stop that will bring them out of this little town to the city. The little walking trip was quiet and awkward. Jessica had no idea where they are heading to and could only depend on Taeyeon leading her. It was cold, due to the late winter days and her hands were freezing up despite having a thick winter coat on and sticking her hands into the pockets. She glanced to her side and watched as Taeyeon walked beside her, seemly unfazed by the cold and she couldn’t help but pout a little. Taeyeon has always loved the cold seasons as far as she could remember while on the other hand, she had never really loved winter season because of the extreme coldness. Yet, she remembered how she enjoyed winter season in the past, when she was with Taeyeon, because the older girl always keeps her warm as much as she could, even warmer than Dan could.
She heaved a soft sigh at the memories. Memories, something that haunts her endlessly and something that she wished she could have locked it away or lost it, especially those with Taeyeon and those with Dan.
Two different people, two different types of memories but all ended up with the similar pain in her. Images flashed across her mind vividly. Back to five years ago, where how she and Taeyeon met and their friendship started. Back to four years ago where she found out that she has fall for Taeyeon, where both of them started to act like a couple, or behave like a couple, from the words of people around them and well, it felt the same for Jessica too. But slowly, things fall apart. They were never even close to being being a couple because all along, someone else was in Taeyeon’s heart.
All long, she never held a place in Taeyeon’s life and she never meant anything to Taeyeon. The older girl had a lover all along.
Way before they met. Way before they were friends. Way before she falls in love with Taeyeon.
And she never knew. Taeyeon had never mentioned it either.
Everything was just a lie. Taeyeon merely played along with it. Until three years ago, she caught Taeyeon and her lover, back in their dorm, in Taeyeon’s room, on Taeyeon’s bed. Just when she has finally mustered out her courage to confess to the older girl on her birthday and Jessica could not deny what a big present she has gotten for that year. Two weeks later, unable to suppress the pain anymore, Jessica chose to left without a word.
Heaving a big sigh, she turned her head away from the front and stared at the road on her left, watching the cars driving carefully on the icy road.
“Are you cold?”
Taeyeon’s voice broke her thoughts and she shook her head slightly, refusing to look at the older girl.
“Are you hungry?”
Once again, she shook her head and chose to stare at the pavement she was walking on. She heard Taeyeon sigh softly beside her but ignored it.
“Sooyeon!”
The next thing she knew after Taeyeon’s sudden call, she was being pulled to a side and thrown into a familiar embrace. Stunned by the sudden action, Jessica could only freeze in Taeyeon’s embrace before being pushed away lightly. Taeyeon’s worried face was the next thing in her view.
“You… you should really kick the habit of walking with your head down. Do you know you almost bump into the lamp post?”
Jessica blinked twice before turning her head back and true to Taeyeon’s words, a lamp post was only a few inches before them. Taeyeon let out a soft sigh again before moving forward with Jessica in her embrace and stuck her hand into Jessica’s pocket to hold onto the younger’s girl hand. She frowned when she realized that Jessica’s hand was freezing cold and gritting her teeth, she pulled out Jessica’s hand before pushing both of their hands back into her own pocket.
“I can walk on my own.”
Jessica spoke out and struggled to retract her hand back from Taeyeon’s grip but the older girl was stronger.
“And have you bump into another lamp post further down the road with the addition of having your hand turning into ice? No way. I am going to hold your hand and lead you all the way whether you like it or not. You should know me by now Sooyeon. I mean what I said.”
Taeyeon retorted back and tightened her grip on Jessica’s hand before continuing walking down to the bus stop, ignoring Jessica’s tiny struggle in her pocket and the glares that were given to her all the way. She couldn’t care anything else except for Jessica’s safety and the fact that the younger girl’s hand is warming up in her grasp. Furthermore, she was used to this tiny bicker that they used to have years ago.
Albeit a little saddening, Taeyeon felt happy that she could relieve these moments once more like the past.
“The bus is here. C’mon.”
Taeyeon spoke out gently and squeezed Jessica’s hand a little before hastening her pace to chase after the bus that is slowing down.
A small smile crept on her face when she realized Jessica had stopped struggling and in return, tightened the grip around their hands.
-
“Hi, I’m Dr. Yuri, Kwon. Your future genealogist but I guess you can call me Yuri since you’re Taeyeon’s friend.”
Jessica nodded her head slightly at the tanned lady in front of her and fidgeted a little in her seat. The doctor was friendly, no doubt, but Jessica couldn’t help but feel uncomfortable. She has never like hospital and it doesn’t help with the fact that she’s coming to check on her baby for the first time. Lots of negative thoughts appeared in her mind and she was worried about her child. She feared for the worst and frankly speaking, Jessica would run away immediately if she has the choice but she couldn’t for the sake of her baby.
“So… I am going to give you a check up and to see if both you and the baby are healthy. Is that alright?”
Yuri asked with a soft smile and stole a glance at Taeyeon who was sitting behind on the couch that was in her room. She could see that the brunette was nervous and uncomfortable so she decided to take things slowly first.
“Okay. Let’s start with a simple conversation to calm you down a little.”
Yuri spoke out and smiled brightly when the older girl returned her with a small shy smile, her eyes gleamed with appreciation at the understanding from the doctor.
“How old is the baby in your tummy now?”
“Going to three months.”
“That’s good! You can see the baby and probably the gender soon too.”
“Really?”
“Mhmm. Excited aren’t we? So, do you have any preference of gender?”
Jessica thought for a while before replying softly.
“No… I don’t think I really had a preference of gender. As long as the baby is healthy, I will be very happy.”
“True, health is the most essential thing for everyone. Speaking of health! How are you feeling nowadays?”
“I’m fine.”
“Eating well?”
“Yes.”
“Really well?”
Yuri reaffirmed again with a pair of teasing eyes and Jessica stalled for a moment before biting her lower lips and glanced a little to her side where Taeyeon was sitting behind.
“I think so?”
Yuri, who was observing Jessica, caught on her little act and nodded her head slightly.
“Well, think so isn’t enough. So, how about we do the check up now and then, we’ll see how we can further improve from here?”
“Okay.”
Finally, Yuri thought and with a smile, she stood up and guided the older girl to the corner where a genealogy chair and other instruments were placed. Jessica followed her but stopped in her tracks when she realized that she is going to let Yuri touch her body and she felt uncomfortable even if she is a doctor. She heard the curtains being drawn closed and she flinched, turning around with a panic and scared expression that had Yuri raised an eyebrow.
“Is there anything wrong?”
Jessica couldn’t reply at all. She was inexperienced and she felt as if she was suffocating under Yuri’s stare and what is Yuri going to do and what she would find out about the baby and her. The stress was weighing on her shoulders and she felt like breaking down. Which, she did and she felt embarrassed for the fact that she was crying for such trivial thing but she could not control her emotions.
Yuri, on the other hand, was more than surprised at the sudden breakdown. However, with her years of experiences in this career, she was trained to be calm and well, she certainly has seen more than this.
Gently, she approached Jessica and smiled softly at the older girl.
“Taeyeon?”
She asked Jessica softly and watched as the older girl nodded her head furiously at the said name. Petting the chair behind Jessica, she signaled for the girl to take a seat before pulling the curtain open and called out to the older girl.
“Tae, I think she’d appreciate if you’re beside her.”
Without any hesitation, Taeyeon jumped on her feet and scurried over to Jessica worriedly.
“Sooyeon, what’s wrong?”
Jessica shook her head as she leaned into Taeyeon’s touch on her forehead and wrapped her arms around the older girl’s waist.
“She’s probably nervous since it’s her first time. You should stay beside her.”
Yuri commented as she re-entered the corner and closed the curtain once again.
“Okay, I’m here. I’m here, hmm?”
Taeyeon muttered softly against Jessica’s head and slowly pushed the girl to lie on the chair before taking a seat beside her. Gently, she slipped her left hand into Jessica’s left hand and gripped it lightly while the other hand went above to caress the younger girls’ forehead with her thumb.
“Ready?”
Jessica nodded her head slowly and tightened her grip around Taeyeon’s hand when Yuri lifted her shirt up and pressed around her slightly bulging tummy with her gloved hands.
The check up took more than fifteen minutes as Yuri noticed that there are a lot of things than both the older girls are unaware of. She had to explain all of them in details and seeing that it was the first time Jessica is looking at her baby through the ultrasound, she allow the younger girl to view it a little longer and basked in the happiness of being a mother soon. Needless to say, Taeyeon was excited as well, based on the big smile and sparkling eyes she had on her face.
“Now Ms Jung, I’ll ask my nurse to print out your baby ultrasound for you to have it as a keepsake but now, we’ve to talk on your health.”
Yuri started off once Jessica tidied up her outfit and took a seat beside her working desk. She flipped through her file and compared it with the current health state information she had taken just now and couldn’t help but frown.
“As we know of your health history, should you want to keep this baby and give birth to it, there are a lot of aspects to be taken care of. Let me put your heart condition aside first and concentrate on your basic health condition.”
Yuri spoke and looked at Jessica who was staring back at her with a worried expression.
“As much as I hate to say this, you’re currently underweight and having slight low blood pressure. This is a big no during pregnancy considering your heart condition. I’d need you to eat more healthily and try to eat less take outs. Please do drink three glass of milk instead of two everyday for your own and the baby sake. Just in case, your body doesn’t get the nutrition you need from the food. I’ll prescribe the milk formula for you and you’d to purchase it from here. Adding on, I would need you to come in every month and if you feel uncomfortable or unwell anywhere, please come back to me as soon as possible.”
Yuri continued while scribbling on her paper and paused for a moment before speaking up again.
“We’re more likely to encourage pregnant lady to have exercise as usual to be healthy and it helps to have a smoother delivery but then again, there’s not a need for strenuous activities. A walk around the park for half to an hour a day would be enough or you could do some Yoga as exercise. Try to relax yourself and stay happy too okay? The later part of the pregnancy would not be easy so you have to take things lightly hmm?”
Jessica nodded her head at the instructions she was given and Yuri gave her a bright smile before leaning back against her chair.
“If you’re feeling unwell anywhere, please do inform Taeyeon too. Especially regarding your heart conditions and well, I’m not sure how the both of you would plan but it would be the best if you let Taeyeon to keep track of you and the baby’s heartbeat every day.”
“My baby’s heartbeat? Do you mean…”
Jessica asked carefully and worried spread across her face rapidly.
“Yes, I’m afraid so Ms. Jung. Heart conditions are usually inheritable and we can’t deny the possibility of your child having it too.”
Jessica felt her heart sank at the announcement. She was so caught up with the sadness that this fact had never crossed her mind before.
“But, don’t worry about it that much okay? For now, your baby is healthy. We just have to make sure you are too and hope for the best okay? So, all you have to do is concentrate on being healthy, happy and take care of yourself.”
Jessica nodded her head hesitantly and forced herself to return Yuri a smile before leaving the room with Taeyeon tagging behind.
“Don’t worry too much okay? Stay happy and just don’t think of all the negative things. Think of happy things and everything will be fine.”
Jessica turned her head sideway to look at Taeyeon who was sitting beside her at the reception area.
“Everything?”
For once, she wants to believe in Taeyeon that everything will be alright.
Taeyeon found herself staring into a pair of scared and lost eyes and found her heart aching for it. With a smile charming smile, Taeyeon placed her hand above Jessica’s and whispered lightly.
“Everything, even if it isn’t in the end, I’ll make sure everything is fine as long as I’m here.”
With that, Taeyeon stood up and went over to the counter to pay the bills and milk formula when Jessica’s name was called shortly after her words of assurance.
Jessica stared at Taeyeon’s back view and once again, a lump was formed it her throat and she found it hard to swallow it down. How she wished she could believe in Taeyeon.
She really wishes that she could believe in Taeyeon.
The older girl turned around and flashed another small smile before walking towards her, slipped her hand into hers and held it tightly before pulling her up and walked out of the genealogy department.
At that moment, Jessica allowed herself to return the tight grip and let herself believe in Taeyeon.
Just like how she had always believed her.
Always.
A/N: This chapter seemed to be a little weird and off. I'm not sure why though. Anyway, sorry for the late update, I'd my reasons and not excuses this time round. Sorry and hope you enjoy. Will proofread when I had the time! Thanks.