Forgetting Something?

[2minds1brain]

Title: Forgetting Something?

Summary: Edward finds Roy five years after mysteriously disappearing. What happened to make Ed forget, and what happens when a serial murderer case suddenly takes a turn for the worse?

Disclaimer: This is obvious.

Manga-verse Roy/Ed

Overall Rating: R-NC17

Chapter Rating: PG13

Chapter two: Edward

Comments

[amethyst_koneko]

Man the print is HUGE on this page! I'm certainly not complaining mind you, I have difficulty with small print; it's just that I think I could read this chapter from across the room! LOL

[2minds1brain]

that's weird with the font. it's normal sized on my computer o_O
This is a very long post :3 Thanks for the feedback. And of COURSE it's Olivier Armstrong? Who else? She's seriously one of my favorite characters, like in the top five. But my computer at home is like nine different kinds of fucked up right now so it might be a while before I get another chapter out. I can only check this while I'm at school D: sadness.

Thanks for the comment :D

[ray_archangel]

Great story so far, I love it :)
And I feel that your writing is very IC. Ed might suffer from amnesia and has changed a lot, but the basic traits of his character are unchanged. Do keep writing please!

Just one problem I have is with your layout. It really hurts my eyes to read white print on black, so I have to copy the story and read it in MSWord. I don't know if others may also find it uncomfortable to read.

[2minds1brain]

woo! Thanks a ton for the review! I'm really happy to know that my Ed is still in character. I was sort of afraid I would totally miss that. And as for the layout? I'm changing it. Too many complications.

Thanks a lot :D

[sara_rojo]

Fantastic story. God, the alchemy bit was unexpected, and it doesn't look good. That Grayson sounds like an asshole, I can already see he'll be one of the first people Ed will encounter, with his luckXD
And, fuck yeah, General Armstrong for leader of the country. I prefer her to Roy in that role

Ed's maturity is very perceptible here. Was Roy looking at him with a sad smile because he said the pants were too long like nothing (and didn't get angry at the implications of short statureXD)? I love his thoughts about Roy's looks; that man sure is hot, he managed to get stranger!Ed hot just in a couple of hoursXD

My favourite part was actually at the end, when Ed's wondering all sort of questions about himself at lightspeed. Having such a brilliant, inquisitive and quick mind it must be stressful as an amnesiac
Well, just being Ed is stressful to an amnesiacXD (I loved the whole "Well, you're this famous hero kid that can do impossible alchemy". How hard must it be to learn all that in a breath?)

[2minds1brain]

HAHA thank you so much!! I'm so pumped to be getting positive reviews! (I've never really published much of my writing and I wasn't sure how well it would be received!)
When Roy smiled at Ed at the pants comment, I thought it would be a quirky funny-but-not smile, because yeah Edward isn't raving about his shortness but it seems like something he would have done those years ago. But fear not! Ed still has his raw nerve on the short issue, it's just a bit more tame. I planned on having some of that in the next chapter XD.

And that 'famous kid with impossible alchemy' crap surely comes into play too. Even though he's matured he's still going to have to get a grip on his status in society, and he'll have to do it all over again and fast; no pressure, Ed, but really, it's all pressure, so hop to it.

Thanks again for the review! I love you all!