(no subject)
Title: Reunion
Author:
slasher48 /
bad_bad_books
Rating: One of my first so only PG
Pairing: Ryan Miller/Daniel Briere , implied Ryan Miller/Taylor Pyatt
Disclaimer: *rolls eyes* Ever seen this story in a magazine or newspaper as reality? No? Well, then I don't own them, 'cause if I did, they'd be doing this for REAL.
"It's a party," explained Jochen Hecht to Daniel Briere over the phone, almost hearing the weary nod.
"And you say it's a reunion of sorts, Jochen?", asked the captain tentatively, listening as Jochen held his breath and replied.
"Mmhmm. Biron, Pyatt, and Novotny will all be there." He heard a thump as Danny dropped the phone with a gasp.
"Pyatt? Taylor Pyatt?", he almost shouted in horror after leaning down to retrieve the handset.
Jochen cringed on the other line. "Yeah, Danny." He was one of the few to know about Ryan and Daniel's relationship and he understood Daniel's hesitation to allow Ryan near Taylor. Ryan had had a crush on the strong but silent player for years; he'd been devastated when he'd been traded.
He could almost hear the wheels turning in Daniel's head as he said quietly, " I have to go, Jochen."
Jochen's eyes narrowed. "Not to go brood, Danny, don't you dare hang up and go sulk in a corner. You don't even know if Ryan likes him anymore."
"I'll talk to you later, Jochen," Daniel said, ignoring the reply, then Jochen heard naught but a dial tone. He cursed at the phone, seeing the oncoming fight when the couple arrived at the party and the possible scene.
The cell rang and he jumped a bit, so caught up in his thoughts of how to stall the argument. He answered it with a bored "Hello?"
"Yeah, Jochen? It's Taylor. I want you to know that I'll be at the party; it sounds like a fabulous idea."
Jochen swallowed. "Alright, Taylor...see ya there."
"Yeah, see ya." The familiar dial tone greeted his ears once again.
Jochen rubbed his temples, feeling a headache coming on.
!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Meanwhile, Daniel was curled up on the couch with a blanket, watching the Devils play the Rangers, his mind not on the game, but turned inwardly as he imagined Ryan's response to the news of Taylor's arrival. He was silent, distraught at the thought that his lover might still hold some affection for his old flame.
He ignored the opening door and kept his eyes trained on the game, even when Ryan came into the living room, standing there with a loaf of Italian bread and a bag of lunchmeat draped over his arm. "Hey, babe, what're you watching?", he asked, plopping down on the couch by Danny's feet.
"A game," replied Danny quietly, not turning to look at him. Ryan didn't notice, his eyes downcast to the table where he set lunch and set to work making himself a sandwich, slathering a piece of bologna with mustard and adding lettuce and tomato onto the creation, then taking a giant bite, a glob spilling onto his chin. He licked it off and faced Danny, holding out his sandwich. "Want some?"
Danny glanced at Ryan and had a sudden vision of his mouth filled with Taylor Pyatt's tongue instead of lunch; his stomach lurched. "No, thanks," he managed, trying to calm his somersaulting stomach.
Ryan shrugged. "Alright...suit yourself." He took another big bite of sandwich."So, who's winning?"
Danny was unsuccessfully trying to push Taylor Pyatt out of his mind, so heaving a long sigh, he turned to face his lover." I don't know, actually. Did you know there was a party this weekend?"
Ryan grinned. "He finally told you?"
Danny nodded distractedly. "Mmhmm. Taylor Pyatt's gonna be there, you know." He watched out of the corner of his eye and was heartily disappointed by Ryan's reaction. The goaltender choked on his sandwich, clapping himself on the chest as mustard went down the wrong tube.
"Really?", he asked Danny, his eyes wide with excitement. Danny stood and walked out of the room, muttering, "Yeah."
"Where you going, love?", he asked, still munching happily on his sandwich and smiling over the thought of seeing his old crush again, distracted from his lover's horrified and fearful expression as Danny turned to say,
"Just to the bathroom." Once there, Danny looked into the mirror and tried to school his features to total indifference with enormous difficulty. He gripped the edges of the sink so hard his knuckles turned white as a tear slipped down his cheek.
, he thought, swiping his eyes and opening the door to Ryan tapping his foot. He pushed past Danny, unzipping his jeans and standing over the toilet. "Jeesh, Danny, you took forever!" He shut the door behind his lover and took a piss, not noticing the captain's suspiciously bright eyes and pale face. Danny had had enough; he stomped to their bedroom and laid on the mattress, shucking his shoes and closing his eyes, wishing desperately to fall asleep and escape the emotions tearing him apart.
He cried silently in his half-conscious state, not even noticing when Ryan slipped in beside him and spooned him, slowly falling into an uneasy sleep.
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Daniel swallowed as he walked into the sitting room of Jochen Hecht's home, scanning the place for any sign of his lover or Taylor. He noticed Biron perched on the arm of a couch and grinned, making his way over to the former goalkeeper and pulling him up to give him a fond embrace. "How've you been, Marty?"
Martin smiled."Just fine, Danny, and yourself?"
Danny looked up and grinned back. "The sa-" but was stopped cold as he saw his lover enter from the kitchen and heard from behind him a familiar voice."Well, if it isn't my favorite goaltender."
Danny closed his eyes as though in pain at Ryan's face immediately lighting up and his lover setting down his beer, making his way towards the former Sabre. Marty noticed his shaky state as he took a small sip of beer himself, his eyes quickly assessing the situation and realizing the cause for Danny's distress. "So, you're with Ryan, huh?"
Danny was brought back from wherever he had been with a thump, whirling to face Martin again, eyes widening. "Yeah. How did you know?"
Marty laughed. "It's obvious you're dead jealous of Pyatt, Danny."
"So how did you know that I don't just like him, that we're actually together?"
Marty grinned. "See, I've seen the kind of jealousy caused by crushes....it's proprietary and rude, since the envious party has no right to stop the other. Your kind of jealousy is the jealousy of a worried lover....the fear, the anxiety of losing what you cherish so dearly, is written plainly over your face for anyone who examines you well enough to see."
Danny smiled a bit. "You're very wise, Marty. Yes, I am jealous of Taylor....he's so much better than me and he has a history with Ryan that I don't.....how can I compete?"
"You don't have to....you already have him. He belongs to you, mind, body and soul, and you to him. If you show him you're worried, he'll rush to reassure you."
Danny brightened a tiny bit. "I'm going to go tell him, then."
"I'll wait." He watched as Danny went to the back and disappeared through the back door into the yard.
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Danny saw a flash of the red tee Ryan was wearing and made his way toward that direction, a grove behind Hecht's house where a ring of apple trees grew.
What he saw made him gasp. Ryan was bent over Taylor's arm, their waists pressed together as they talked quietly to each other, eyes glued to their companion's face. He didn't even call out, just turned tail and ran, all the way back through the house, stopping only to tell Jochen he was leaving, ignoring Marty's yell of his name after him.
He had no idea how he drove back to their house, his eyes blurred as they were with tears while his whole body shook violently. He stumbled through the door and onto the couch, pulling his knees up and sobbing into them, his shoulders shaking, loud wails of misery echoing throughout the house. He'd lost him, his lover, his best friend, the man he thought he'd someday marry, to another. The grief tore him apart as his heart twisted painfully.
He was torn between wanting and NOT wanting the explanation, because he was sure he already knew what would be said.
He could picture Ryan's horrorstruck expression as he heard Daniel's accusations, trying and failing to conceal his shock. "I'm so sorry, Danny....I still love him. I can't help that." It wouldn't even be a screaming match, just a quietly calm mutual decision to part ways. That thought struck him like a blow to the stomach, making him double over in pain just thinking the word apart, gasping for breath as tears once more sprang to his eyes.
He lay down, knees still pulled up to his chest, still crying over his loss. "What'll I do without him?" was his last thought as his eyes closed and he fell into a deep, thankfully dreamless sleep.
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Ryan and Taylor were hanging on a bench on the patio when Martin Biron came and smacked Ryan upside the head. Ryan gave him a dirty look, rubbing his sore head. "What the hell was that for?"
"Your oblivion when it comes to your lover's feelings and your total betrayal," he hissed savagely, then walked away without another word, leaving Ryan to think on his words.
He looked over to the corner where Derek Roy sat and his eyes widened.
He stood, excusing himself to Taylor, and went looking for Jochen, his eyes perusing the rooms as he walked through them, still seeing no Captain Briere, getting uneasier by the second. Finally, he located his host, standing by the door to the living room, chatting with Jiri Novotny, the former Sabre traded just that year. Budging into the space, his eyes were locked on Jochen, who looked toward him with obvious exasperation. "What, Ryan?"
Ryan's eyes widened at his open annoyance; Jochen Hecht wasn't usually so borderline hostile to him. "D'you know where Daniel went, Jochen?"
Jochen's eyes narrowed. "No, the question is, do you know where he is?"
Ryan scuffed the carpet with his shoes, his eyes glued to the ground. "No, I don't."
Jochen sighed. "Look out the window." Ryan did as he was told and his eyes widened even more, his mouth letting forth a surprised gasp.
"He left hours ago, only stopping to tell me he was going, not even waving to Biron who he'd been speaking with. And you never even noticed, occupied as you were with Taylor in the apple tree grove." He looked down on Ryan, not bothering to hide his disgust with the goaltender.
Ryan looked down guiltily. "Yeah, I know. He must be so angry with me."
Jochen sighed again, this time with a slight bit of pity toward the previously oblivious man. "Not angry," he murmured quietly.
"Then why would he leave?", asked Ryan, his brow furrowing confusedly.
Marty stepped up behind them, his eyes glaring a hole into Ryan's back. "He didn't just leave, Ryan, he ran....from whatever he saw out back." He saw Ryan turn and shrink a little at his obvious hostility. He decided to twist the knife that much further, hoping to cause the man the pain his lover was experiencing right now. "He was crying, Ryan, if that gives you a clue."
Ryan's jaw dropped. "He must've seen...but no...he would realize I wouldn't.....wouldn't he? I mean, I don't like him that way anymore....he must see that!" The other two just listened to his murmured tirade, watching as he grew more and more upset with himself.
"What did he see, Ryan, that hurt him like that? What have you done?"
Ryan's eyes were wet when he looked up to meet Martin's penetrating gaze. "I-I have to go," he muttered, running out of the house almost as fast as Danny had hours before.
He threw himself into his car and sped out of the driveway, racing towards their house, hoping against hope that Danny was still there, that he hadn't been stupid enough to lose him for good.
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He slugged depressedly through the door to their house, heading towards the stairs to go upstairs and cry himself to sleep, but the silent figure on the couch stopped him cold.
He stepped closer, closing the door silently and staring in agony at the man sleeping peacefully at the couch. His heart broke a little as he noticed dried tear tracks covering his love's cheeks.< HOW could I be so STUPID? I was killing him without even noticing it!>
He sat gently on the coffee table and stroked his finger down one pale, wet cheek., he wondered, distraught at even the thought of losing his precious lover. He ran his fingers through the soaked brown hair and thought distractedly about life without Danny, getting steadily more and more angry at himself for almost letting it happen.
He didn't notice the chocolate brown eyes open sleepily and fill with tears, only heard the quiet gasp as Danny realized who was next to him. He moved away from Ryan's touch, his eyes narrowing and another flood of tears flowing down his cheeks at his lover's betrayal. He looked away as Ryan opened his mouth to speak, his heart breaking every second he had to stare into those gorgeous amber eyes, filled with concern and false love. "Just leave, Ryan. It's over." He bit his lip to stop words of forgiveness and pleas for him to stay from spilling out of his lips.
"But, Danny..." Ryan pleaded, his heart breaking that much more as the captain shook his head, still firmly keeping his eyes off his lover.
"Save the explanation and just get out, leave me alone." It was killing him to ignore Ryan's seemingly desperate words, but his instinct for self preservation was strong enough to override his emotional response to the anxiety in his lover's voice.
"Please, Danny," he begged, trying to turn his lover's face to look at him and failing, Danny's determination infallible no matter what he did.
"No, Ryan, just please leave me to perish in peace." Ryan's eyes widened at the implication and he stepped in front of the captain, kneeling until he was looking into Danny's eyes, his own filled with immeasurable remorse and nervousness.
"NO, Danny, you have to hear me out. What you saw was nothing....Taylor was teaching me how to dance so I could show you some amazing moves, since you're always begging me to learn so we could dance together. We were talking about what positions to change to next, so I didn't notice that you saw us. If I had, I would have hurriedly made sure you knew that."
Danny shook his head stubbornly. "But you loved him for years before we got together, and you still want him, I can see it. How can I compete with such a longstanding longing? I'm only me, and he's Taylor Pyatt for Christ's sakes."
Ryan sat back on the couch and took Daniel's hand, looking him in the eyes with every word he spoke. "Never mistake lust for love, baby. I wanted Taylor for forever before I wanted you, but I love you. Nothing and no one from my past could change that. No matter who I might think I still want, I want you the most, now and forever. Never doubt that."
Danny's eyes filled with tears, happy ones this time, and he threw himself at his lover. " I love you, too, Ryan. I was so scared I'd lost you."
Ryan held his Danny close to him, pressing his lips to his hair. "Why did you try to send me away then, love?"
Danny sniffled into his chest. "Because I'd rather feel the pain of you leaving a thousand times than hear you say you loved him and had to be with him."
Ryan's eyes dripped a bit as he folded Danny even further into his embrace, murmuring to him soothingly. "You'll never hear that, Danny, don't worry. My heart belongs to you."
"And mine to you, Ryan, " the other added with a watery smile up at his lover.
Ryan leant down to press a kiss to Danny's lips, soft and chaste. "Always."
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Please leave a comment...if I have to guess what people think of this..I'll go out of my mind lol
Author:
slasher48 /
bad_bad_books
Rating: One of my first so only PG
Pairing: Ryan Miller/Daniel Briere , implied Ryan Miller/Taylor Pyatt
Disclaimer: *rolls eyes* Ever seen this story in a magazine or newspaper as reality? No? Well, then I don't own them, 'cause if I did, they'd be doing this for REAL.
"It's a party," explained Jochen Hecht to Daniel Briere over the phone, almost hearing the weary nod.
"And you say it's a reunion of sorts, Jochen?", asked the captain tentatively, listening as Jochen held his breath and replied.
"Mmhmm. Biron, Pyatt, and Novotny will all be there." He heard a thump as Danny dropped the phone with a gasp.
"Pyatt? Taylor Pyatt?", he almost shouted in horror after leaning down to retrieve the handset.
Jochen cringed on the other line. "Yeah, Danny." He was one of the few to know about Ryan and Daniel's relationship and he understood Daniel's hesitation to allow Ryan near Taylor. Ryan had had a crush on the strong but silent player for years; he'd been devastated when he'd been traded.
He could almost hear the wheels turning in Daniel's head as he said quietly, " I have to go, Jochen."
Jochen's eyes narrowed. "Not to go brood, Danny, don't you dare hang up and go sulk in a corner. You don't even know if Ryan likes him anymore."
"I'll talk to you later, Jochen," Daniel said, ignoring the reply, then Jochen heard naught but a dial tone. He cursed at the phone, seeing the oncoming fight when the couple arrived at the party and the possible scene.
The cell rang and he jumped a bit, so caught up in his thoughts of how to stall the argument. He answered it with a bored "Hello?"
"Yeah, Jochen? It's Taylor. I want you to know that I'll be at the party; it sounds like a fabulous idea."
Jochen swallowed. "Alright, Taylor...see ya there."
"Yeah, see ya." The familiar dial tone greeted his ears once again.
Jochen rubbed his temples, feeling a headache coming on.
!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Meanwhile, Daniel was curled up on the couch with a blanket, watching the Devils play the Rangers, his mind not on the game, but turned inwardly as he imagined Ryan's response to the news of Taylor's arrival. He was silent, distraught at the thought that his lover might still hold some affection for his old flame.
He ignored the opening door and kept his eyes trained on the game, even when Ryan came into the living room, standing there with a loaf of Italian bread and a bag of lunchmeat draped over his arm. "Hey, babe, what're you watching?", he asked, plopping down on the couch by Danny's feet.
"A game," replied Danny quietly, not turning to look at him. Ryan didn't notice, his eyes downcast to the table where he set lunch and set to work making himself a sandwich, slathering a piece of bologna with mustard and adding lettuce and tomato onto the creation, then taking a giant bite, a glob spilling onto his chin. He licked it off and faced Danny, holding out his sandwich. "Want some?"
Danny glanced at Ryan and had a sudden vision of his mouth filled with Taylor Pyatt's tongue instead of lunch; his stomach lurched. "No, thanks," he managed, trying to calm his somersaulting stomach.
Ryan shrugged. "Alright...suit yourself." He took another big bite of sandwich."So, who's winning?"
Danny was unsuccessfully trying to push Taylor Pyatt out of his mind, so heaving a long sigh, he turned to face his lover." I don't know, actually. Did you know there was a party this weekend?"
Ryan grinned. "He finally told you?"
Danny nodded distractedly. "Mmhmm. Taylor Pyatt's gonna be there, you know." He watched out of the corner of his eye and was heartily disappointed by Ryan's reaction. The goaltender choked on his sandwich, clapping himself on the chest as mustard went down the wrong tube.
"Really?", he asked Danny, his eyes wide with excitement. Danny stood and walked out of the room, muttering, "Yeah."
"Where you going, love?", he asked, still munching happily on his sandwich and smiling over the thought of seeing his old crush again, distracted from his lover's horrified and fearful expression as Danny turned to say,
"Just to the bathroom." Once there, Danny looked into the mirror and tried to school his features to total indifference with enormous difficulty. He gripped the edges of the sink so hard his knuckles turned white as a tear slipped down his cheek.
, he thought, swiping his eyes and opening the door to Ryan tapping his foot. He pushed past Danny, unzipping his jeans and standing over the toilet. "Jeesh, Danny, you took forever!" He shut the door behind his lover and took a piss, not noticing the captain's suspiciously bright eyes and pale face. Danny had had enough; he stomped to their bedroom and laid on the mattress, shucking his shoes and closing his eyes, wishing desperately to fall asleep and escape the emotions tearing him apart.
He cried silently in his half-conscious state, not even noticing when Ryan slipped in beside him and spooned him, slowly falling into an uneasy sleep.
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Daniel swallowed as he walked into the sitting room of Jochen Hecht's home, scanning the place for any sign of his lover or Taylor. He noticed Biron perched on the arm of a couch and grinned, making his way over to the former goalkeeper and pulling him up to give him a fond embrace. "How've you been, Marty?"
Martin smiled."Just fine, Danny, and yourself?"
Danny looked up and grinned back. "The sa-" but was stopped cold as he saw his lover enter from the kitchen and heard from behind him a familiar voice."Well, if it isn't my favorite goaltender."
Danny closed his eyes as though in pain at Ryan's face immediately lighting up and his lover setting down his beer, making his way towards the former Sabre. Marty noticed his shaky state as he took a small sip of beer himself, his eyes quickly assessing the situation and realizing the cause for Danny's distress. "So, you're with Ryan, huh?"
Danny was brought back from wherever he had been with a thump, whirling to face Martin again, eyes widening. "Yeah. How did you know?"
Marty laughed. "It's obvious you're dead jealous of Pyatt, Danny."
"So how did you know that I don't just like him, that we're actually together?"
Marty grinned. "See, I've seen the kind of jealousy caused by crushes....it's proprietary and rude, since the envious party has no right to stop the other. Your kind of jealousy is the jealousy of a worried lover....the fear, the anxiety of losing what you cherish so dearly, is written plainly over your face for anyone who examines you well enough to see."
Danny smiled a bit. "You're very wise, Marty. Yes, I am jealous of Taylor....he's so much better than me and he has a history with Ryan that I don't.....how can I compete?"
"You don't have to....you already have him. He belongs to you, mind, body and soul, and you to him. If you show him you're worried, he'll rush to reassure you."
Danny brightened a tiny bit. "I'm going to go tell him, then."
"I'll wait." He watched as Danny went to the back and disappeared through the back door into the yard.
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Danny saw a flash of the red tee Ryan was wearing and made his way toward that direction, a grove behind Hecht's house where a ring of apple trees grew.
What he saw made him gasp. Ryan was bent over Taylor's arm, their waists pressed together as they talked quietly to each other, eyes glued to their companion's face. He didn't even call out, just turned tail and ran, all the way back through the house, stopping only to tell Jochen he was leaving, ignoring Marty's yell of his name after him.
He had no idea how he drove back to their house, his eyes blurred as they were with tears while his whole body shook violently. He stumbled through the door and onto the couch, pulling his knees up and sobbing into them, his shoulders shaking, loud wails of misery echoing throughout the house. He'd lost him, his lover, his best friend, the man he thought he'd someday marry, to another. The grief tore him apart as his heart twisted painfully.
He was torn between wanting and NOT wanting the explanation, because he was sure he already knew what would be said.
He could picture Ryan's horrorstruck expression as he heard Daniel's accusations, trying and failing to conceal his shock. "I'm so sorry, Danny....I still love him. I can't help that." It wouldn't even be a screaming match, just a quietly calm mutual decision to part ways. That thought struck him like a blow to the stomach, making him double over in pain just thinking the word apart, gasping for breath as tears once more sprang to his eyes.
He lay down, knees still pulled up to his chest, still crying over his loss. "What'll I do without him?" was his last thought as his eyes closed and he fell into a deep, thankfully dreamless sleep.
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Ryan and Taylor were hanging on a bench on the patio when Martin Biron came and smacked Ryan upside the head. Ryan gave him a dirty look, rubbing his sore head. "What the hell was that for?"
"Your oblivion when it comes to your lover's feelings and your total betrayal," he hissed savagely, then walked away without another word, leaving Ryan to think on his words.
He looked over to the corner where Derek Roy sat and his eyes widened.
He stood, excusing himself to Taylor, and went looking for Jochen, his eyes perusing the rooms as he walked through them, still seeing no Captain Briere, getting uneasier by the second. Finally, he located his host, standing by the door to the living room, chatting with Jiri Novotny, the former Sabre traded just that year. Budging into the space, his eyes were locked on Jochen, who looked toward him with obvious exasperation. "What, Ryan?"
Ryan's eyes widened at his open annoyance; Jochen Hecht wasn't usually so borderline hostile to him. "D'you know where Daniel went, Jochen?"
Jochen's eyes narrowed. "No, the question is, do you know where he is?"
Ryan scuffed the carpet with his shoes, his eyes glued to the ground. "No, I don't."
Jochen sighed. "Look out the window." Ryan did as he was told and his eyes widened even more, his mouth letting forth a surprised gasp.
"He left hours ago, only stopping to tell me he was going, not even waving to Biron who he'd been speaking with. And you never even noticed, occupied as you were with Taylor in the apple tree grove." He looked down on Ryan, not bothering to hide his disgust with the goaltender.
Ryan looked down guiltily. "Yeah, I know. He must be so angry with me."
Jochen sighed again, this time with a slight bit of pity toward the previously oblivious man. "Not angry," he murmured quietly.
"Then why would he leave?", asked Ryan, his brow furrowing confusedly.
Marty stepped up behind them, his eyes glaring a hole into Ryan's back. "He didn't just leave, Ryan, he ran....from whatever he saw out back." He saw Ryan turn and shrink a little at his obvious hostility. He decided to twist the knife that much further, hoping to cause the man the pain his lover was experiencing right now. "He was crying, Ryan, if that gives you a clue."
Ryan's jaw dropped. "He must've seen...but no...he would realize I wouldn't.....wouldn't he? I mean, I don't like him that way anymore....he must see that!" The other two just listened to his murmured tirade, watching as he grew more and more upset with himself.
"What did he see, Ryan, that hurt him like that? What have you done?"
Ryan's eyes were wet when he looked up to meet Martin's penetrating gaze. "I-I have to go," he muttered, running out of the house almost as fast as Danny had hours before.
He threw himself into his car and sped out of the driveway, racing towards their house, hoping against hope that Danny was still there, that he hadn't been stupid enough to lose him for good.
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He slugged depressedly through the door to their house, heading towards the stairs to go upstairs and cry himself to sleep, but the silent figure on the couch stopped him cold.
He stepped closer, closing the door silently and staring in agony at the man sleeping peacefully at the couch. His heart broke a little as he noticed dried tear tracks covering his love's cheeks.< HOW could I be so STUPID? I was killing him without even noticing it!>
He sat gently on the coffee table and stroked his finger down one pale, wet cheek., he wondered, distraught at even the thought of losing his precious lover. He ran his fingers through the soaked brown hair and thought distractedly about life without Danny, getting steadily more and more angry at himself for almost letting it happen.
He didn't notice the chocolate brown eyes open sleepily and fill with tears, only heard the quiet gasp as Danny realized who was next to him. He moved away from Ryan's touch, his eyes narrowing and another flood of tears flowing down his cheeks at his lover's betrayal. He looked away as Ryan opened his mouth to speak, his heart breaking every second he had to stare into those gorgeous amber eyes, filled with concern and false love. "Just leave, Ryan. It's over." He bit his lip to stop words of forgiveness and pleas for him to stay from spilling out of his lips.
"But, Danny..." Ryan pleaded, his heart breaking that much more as the captain shook his head, still firmly keeping his eyes off his lover.
"Save the explanation and just get out, leave me alone." It was killing him to ignore Ryan's seemingly desperate words, but his instinct for self preservation was strong enough to override his emotional response to the anxiety in his lover's voice.
"Please, Danny," he begged, trying to turn his lover's face to look at him and failing, Danny's determination infallible no matter what he did.
"No, Ryan, just please leave me to perish in peace." Ryan's eyes widened at the implication and he stepped in front of the captain, kneeling until he was looking into Danny's eyes, his own filled with immeasurable remorse and nervousness.
"NO, Danny, you have to hear me out. What you saw was nothing....Taylor was teaching me how to dance so I could show you some amazing moves, since you're always begging me to learn so we could dance together. We were talking about what positions to change to next, so I didn't notice that you saw us. If I had, I would have hurriedly made sure you knew that."
Danny shook his head stubbornly. "But you loved him for years before we got together, and you still want him, I can see it. How can I compete with such a longstanding longing? I'm only me, and he's Taylor Pyatt for Christ's sakes."
Ryan sat back on the couch and took Daniel's hand, looking him in the eyes with every word he spoke. "Never mistake lust for love, baby. I wanted Taylor for forever before I wanted you, but I love you. Nothing and no one from my past could change that. No matter who I might think I still want, I want you the most, now and forever. Never doubt that."
Danny's eyes filled with tears, happy ones this time, and he threw himself at his lover. " I love you, too, Ryan. I was so scared I'd lost you."
Ryan held his Danny close to him, pressing his lips to his hair. "Why did you try to send me away then, love?"
Danny sniffled into his chest. "Because I'd rather feel the pain of you leaving a thousand times than hear you say you loved him and had to be with him."
Ryan's eyes dripped a bit as he folded Danny even further into his embrace, murmuring to him soothingly. "You'll never hear that, Danny, don't worry. My heart belongs to you."
"And mine to you, Ryan, " the other added with a watery smile up at his lover.
Ryan leant down to press a kiss to Danny's lips, soft and chaste. "Always."
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