why yes, i do feel like shit...
you know, i doubt that have ever really felt as horrible as i do now...i cant believe what happened, last night and then today...mackie, who i thought would be able to "help" was just being a total bitch...i was staring into nowhere, just thinking about what had happened, and she slaps my face and tells me to "snap out of it." so of course, me being in no mood to play around, i slapped her back, not my hardest, but i slapped her back and i totally meant it. and then she goes and tells andrea and yasi probably because she knew she would get a reaction out of them, and of course she was half right. andrea, im thanking u, i know u probably just didnt say anything to prevent a whole argument, but that's what im thankful for too. thats why i chose to ignore yasi after saying only a few words to her...i really want to not talk to them...and alie...shit...i love her ...if ur reading this alie, which i really hope you are...i love you, i really do, and even though u already knew that i just have to tell u again...i dont know what to do...im at a loss, and my mind is swimming with crazy thoughts of why we split...i have no idea what i couldve done and if u needed help with something or needed to talk, why couldnt u just talk to me?i would have listened, and i would have helped you if i could, so please, tell me...why?