Truth (CCS, Eriol/Sakura, #15, #29)
Title: Truth
Author/Artist: khaas
Pairing: Hiirigizawa Eriol/Kinomoto Sakura
Fandom: Card Captor Sakura (manga)
Theme: #15. perfect blue, #29. the sound of waves
Disclaimer: CCS does NOT belong to me. If it did, the ending would've been EXTREMELY different.
If anybody knew why she decided never to mourn, it would be him. He would be the one person who would have enough instinct to realize why she never cried.
:~:
When she looked back on that day, a million different images rushed through her mind. If it were a street and thoughts were cars, she would have been dead the minute she stepped onto that concrete pavement in hopes of clutching onto one of them and running with it. So instead of allowing herself to take short flashes and using them to define that entire day, she forced herself to mentally relive the whole event. She remembered everything that happened, every emotion she felt, every move he made, and every truth that existed and related to that day.
In recent years, she saw her best friend entwine fingers with his. She watched him place a comforting hand upon the top of her head, raking soft, protective fingers through those long, dark strands. He bent down (because she was about half a head shorter than him) to kiss her cheek. They made the most amazing couple. No words were needed. No hatred seen.
They made her the happiest person in the world.
:~:
She did try. But when it comes to life, everybody else has their own stories to tell. They only speak of her when her own life intersects with theirs, which is not often enough for them to get an accurate depiction of her. It was like looking at the sky through the leaves of a healthy tree. From what they thought they knew about her capability to love and adore, they labeled that day as heartbreaking, painful, utterly unspeakable.
So when May 29th came along, she decided to leave them to their opinions and find peace in a world of her own. She left the house with nothing but her wallet, walked three blocks down to the local bus stop, got on, paid the fee, and sat down for half an hour before she got off at the beach. The sun was beginning to rise, and the faint smell of the gorgeous ocean seeped into her nostrils. When she got to the sand, she immediately took of her shoes and sunk her toes in, relishing in the smooth feeling that it emitted. She looked at her watch and saw that it was about nine in the morning.
Five years ago from today, she and Syaoran decided to call off the relationship.
:~:
She almost didn't remember where they decided to meet.
Ten seconds later, she closed the book that she was reading.
Two minutes later, she put the finishing touches to her outfit and ran out of the door.
Twenty minutes later, she was dashing down the street, manuevering her body past the large crowds of people.
Five minutes later, she found him standing by the water fountain in front of the shopping mall.
Ten minutes later, they went their separate ways.
Why did she dress up again?
:~:
A light breeze was blowing away from the ocean; it swept against her until she crouched down to fall back onto the sand. Looking up at the sky, she thought back to that day.
:~:
The storm was more than enough of an incentive for her to go back into the house. It was only 1pm in the afternoon, but enough dark clouds filled the sky to make her want to argue otherwise. Her sneakers were soaked after a few minutes of walking. Her plastic umbrella kept the rain from falling on her head, but the light wind got most of her lower body wet anyway. Traffic was heavy. One of the cars had its window down, and she heard that an accident had occurred in the downtown district.
When she walked past the penguin slide, she noticed some children still out, dancing and splashing as if it was just another clear, blue sky instead of heavy showers. Above the noise of rain drops falling everywhere, she could hear the faint voice of a mother yelling that if they didn't leave in another five minutes, she would not treat them to candy.
She glanced at her watch, saw the time, and gasped. She was running late.
The rest of the scenery was a blur to her. She remembered the sounds of her shoes splashing puddles and in one moment, she almost slipped. She remembered that as she got closer to the shopping mall, more and more people appeared on her streets and it became difficult to manuever past all of them. And her umbrella kept getting in the way.
Random puddles scattered the front of the shopping mall. The lamps were on because of the dim sky. And he stood in front of the water fountain, which she realized was not even functioning, a black umbrella in his hands. She remembered the concrete floor consisted of grey, diamond-shaped tiles. She remembered the statue of the water fountain was covered in moss. She remembered how strange it was that even at that moment, the rain, her wet clothes, her soaked shoes, and his black umbrella seemed more exciting than what was to come.
:~:
When had she closed her eyes? When she opened them again, the sky was much lighter, and more blue than before. But tints of dawn still danced in her sight. Suddenly, her stomach rumbled, and she realized why. About twenty feet away from her, a family had settled down and started to barbecue. She looked around and found a food stand. Getting up, she took out her wallet and walked towards it.
:~:
When she dashed down the stairs, the faint smell of tea and lunch greeted her. She stopped at the front door to take a whiff of the flowers that her father had placed in a vase just a few days ago before she went outside. They smelled of bristling life in the quaint world of change.
As she walked down the street, she remembered catching the scent of musky, moist plants. A guy walking past her had a lit cigarette, and he decided to breathe out the smoke when she was about six inches away from him. Attacked by this sudden whiff, she went through a few seconds' worth of coughing. At the site of the accident, which was only three blocks away from the shopping mall, she smelled something burning and saw that one of the cars' engine had overheated.
The minute she laid eyes upon him, she walked towards his direction. She past a food stand, catching a whiff of the goods, and decided that after she got this done and over with, she would go eat lunch at the cafe that was a block away. A woman who walked by her gave off a strong smell of perfume, which quickly dissipated when a gust of wind blew by right afterwards.
When she stopped with her body about five inches away from his, Syaoran smelled of Syaoran.
:~:
"You have no idea how long it took for me to finally realize just exactly where you would escape to."
Her eyes widened as she turned to look at him. She was sitting in front of the food stand, eating a sandwich. "Eriol," she stated.
He had taken the seat next to her and ordered a cup of cold water. "Sakura, how are you?"
"Why are you here?" she asked, ignoring his question.
"Because I remembered that this is where the perfect color of blue can be seen on a day like this. And though it is not your favorite color, once in a while, you still try to remember what that shade of color is."
She turned to look at him, watching as the wind played with his hair. She could hear the waves clash onto the beach and the voices of families, friends, or anything laughing and conversing as they enjoyed the day. She could hear his voice as he talked, and remembered that it has been two years since he came to Tomoeda to visit.
"I remember what was said on that day."
"Do you?"
"Yes. What do you think happened?"
"I think you and Syaoran know and I'll only guess inaccurately."
"What was the weather like? How long do you think we talked? How many people did I see? What do you think I felt? What do you think he felt? How wrong do you think you are?"
"Sakura, if you were what everyone said you were, I'm sure Tomoyo would not look as radiant as she does today."
"You're the only one to say that. You're the only one who wasn't involved to have ever said that. And I only try to remember shades of blue once in a while because I'm always surrounded by green. It's not a bad thing, but life needs variety."
"And as to how you two felt," he continued, ignoring the latter part of what she said, "it was probably content. Ease. The weight of the world was finally off your shoulders."
"You're assuming. This is what I have to deal with everytime someone mentions this. They have no idea what happened. And if they thought they did, they've completely forgotten. But Syaoran and me? We remember every word we heard, and every word we said. We remember assisting each other out of our chains."
:~:
"Sakura! Don't forget to eat!"
"I'm running late! I'll find some food on my way there. Bye!"
"In the downtown district, two cars crashed in the middle of an intersection. Police are there, but there is no telling as to when traffic will begin to clear..."
"So yesterday, I found him-"
"Sachiko! If you and your friends don't stop playing this instant, I will NOT buy any candy for you!"
"But mooooooooooooooom-"
"So what did you say?"
"I told her that it wasn't-"
"Hello. Please connect me to-"
"-which was ridiculous since-"
"-for sale! But I was too late."
"-food! I want some food!"
"Fine, we'll go get some from that stand."
"Good afternoon."
"Good afternoon."
"Did you wait long?"
"Not really. Crappy weather, huh?" Scowl.
"Yeah. I'm soaked. My feet feel uncomfortable right now."
"Me, too. Anyway, what do you want to do today? Some new movies are out. Or have you eaten yet?"
Laughter. "Oh, shut it."
"What?" Smirk.
"I can't believe we decided to meet TODAY. You have bad timing."
"Well, you didn't want to do this at school. But really, is there much left to talk bout?"
"I didn't want to do this at school because gossip travels faster than the speed of light. And actually, I think we reached an understanding waaay before today. But this is mainly so I can at least feel like SOME book has closed."
Laughter. "True."
"I know this is coming pretty late, but did you ever think we were really going to do this, Syaoran?"
"Not until a few months ago. People change, you know." Shrug. "We've changed. I'm just glad it's a simultaneous thing."
"Yeah. I think this is a sign. If we can still be happy whether we are together or not, I think it's a sign."
"I did love you, though."
Smile. "Me, too. In fact, when I was younger, I thought we would be together forever."
"ARE you happy with this? I mean-"
"Oh, shut up." Sigh. "It doesn't matter whether or not I'm happy with this. What matters is how this affects both of us. But since you asked, I'm not crying my heart out. I'm a little bit sad, but... I feel pretty relieved. Like I can breathe again."
"Good. Me, too. Sakura, I want the best for you. I hope you find it, whether it will be in you, or in someone else's connection to you."
"Thank you. And the best of luck to you, too. I'll see you at school?"
"Yeah. What do you think will happen?"
"I think I'm going to be the tragic maiden of despair and nothingness without you. And you'll be the reluctant but selfish asshole who dumped me."
Laughter again. "Oh, I can't wait."
Two smiles, one hug, and finally, two different roads.
:~:
Eriol smiled. "Do you ever feel like tellling them?"
"The people who are involved know the truth. If my close friends ask, then I'll explain. But really, isn't it more than enough for me to know that I am happy? Self-realization was the key part to that day. It doesn't matter to me what stories others want to weave out of this. I'm not a tragic person. My life story is not tragic. Syaoran and I are still good friends and I know now, as I have known for so many years now, that this is more than enough."
"Good." Eriol stood up and swept his hands over his pants to wipe some sand away. He held his hand out to her.
Sakura reached for it and felt her physical state move up until she was almost eye level with his neck. He had grown again. She looked at her watch and found that it was two in the afternoon.
"Well, whatever the case is," Eriol started, "do you want to spend more time here?"
She shook her head, a small smile playing upon her lips. "I've missed you. Let's go back to my home. I'll get some stuff done and then treat you for dinner tonight, okay? How long will you be staying this time?"
The blue-haired male smiled at her as he started to put his shoes on. "Why?"
"I want to know," she said in a matter-of-fact manner. As she looked at his hair, her mind suddenly decided to say that it was the most beauitful shade of blue. Perfect. But still, Eriol was right; she didn't care much for blue.
"It'll be permanent this time."
She nodded her head, reaching for her own shoes, when she paused and turned to look at him. He was nonchalantly tying his shoelaces, but she could see that small smirk. She could see that hint of a secret, and he KNEW she wanted to tear it from him as soon as possible. "What?" she whispered.
He stood up straight again turned towards her. "I'm staying."
"You're... staying? Why?" Her voice was still soft. Still in awe.
He bent down and picked up her shoes. In the next few minutes, the only sound that came out of them was soft breathing. Soft breathing that was drowned out by the blue ocean waves, light pale breeze, and the fact that she still couldn't get over how gorgeous his hair perfect blue hair swayed with the life of their surroundings. She stared down at him, and he stared down at her shoes. When he stood up again, he reached for her hand and began to lead her to the bus stop.
"How about you tell me the truth of that day, and I'll tell you the truth as to why I'm staying?"
Actually, his voice had a perfect tone to it as well.
She frowned. "That doesn't sound like a fair exchange."
He shrugged. "Sakura, do you think I'm worth it?"
"Eriol, I've known you for too many years to even TRY to answer that question with anything less than a term paper's worth of length. But for now, I'll just say this: of COURSE you're worth it."
Smile. "Then it'll be a fair exchange. Truths, after all, tend to be worth more than just mere pennies."
Author/Artist: khaas
Pairing: Hiirigizawa Eriol/Kinomoto Sakura
Fandom: Card Captor Sakura (manga)
Theme: #15. perfect blue, #29. the sound of waves
Disclaimer: CCS does NOT belong to me. If it did, the ending would've been EXTREMELY different.
If anybody knew why she decided never to mourn, it would be him. He would be the one person who would have enough instinct to realize why she never cried.
:~:
When she looked back on that day, a million different images rushed through her mind. If it were a street and thoughts were cars, she would have been dead the minute she stepped onto that concrete pavement in hopes of clutching onto one of them and running with it. So instead of allowing herself to take short flashes and using them to define that entire day, she forced herself to mentally relive the whole event. She remembered everything that happened, every emotion she felt, every move he made, and every truth that existed and related to that day.
In recent years, she saw her best friend entwine fingers with his. She watched him place a comforting hand upon the top of her head, raking soft, protective fingers through those long, dark strands. He bent down (because she was about half a head shorter than him) to kiss her cheek. They made the most amazing couple. No words were needed. No hatred seen.
They made her the happiest person in the world.
:~:
She did try. But when it comes to life, everybody else has their own stories to tell. They only speak of her when her own life intersects with theirs, which is not often enough for them to get an accurate depiction of her. It was like looking at the sky through the leaves of a healthy tree. From what they thought they knew about her capability to love and adore, they labeled that day as heartbreaking, painful, utterly unspeakable.
So when May 29th came along, she decided to leave them to their opinions and find peace in a world of her own. She left the house with nothing but her wallet, walked three blocks down to the local bus stop, got on, paid the fee, and sat down for half an hour before she got off at the beach. The sun was beginning to rise, and the faint smell of the gorgeous ocean seeped into her nostrils. When she got to the sand, she immediately took of her shoes and sunk her toes in, relishing in the smooth feeling that it emitted. She looked at her watch and saw that it was about nine in the morning.
Five years ago from today, she and Syaoran decided to call off the relationship.
:~:
She almost didn't remember where they decided to meet.
Ten seconds later, she closed the book that she was reading.
Two minutes later, she put the finishing touches to her outfit and ran out of the door.
Twenty minutes later, she was dashing down the street, manuevering her body past the large crowds of people.
Five minutes later, she found him standing by the water fountain in front of the shopping mall.
Ten minutes later, they went their separate ways.
Why did she dress up again?
:~:
A light breeze was blowing away from the ocean; it swept against her until she crouched down to fall back onto the sand. Looking up at the sky, she thought back to that day.
:~:
The storm was more than enough of an incentive for her to go back into the house. It was only 1pm in the afternoon, but enough dark clouds filled the sky to make her want to argue otherwise. Her sneakers were soaked after a few minutes of walking. Her plastic umbrella kept the rain from falling on her head, but the light wind got most of her lower body wet anyway. Traffic was heavy. One of the cars had its window down, and she heard that an accident had occurred in the downtown district.
When she walked past the penguin slide, she noticed some children still out, dancing and splashing as if it was just another clear, blue sky instead of heavy showers. Above the noise of rain drops falling everywhere, she could hear the faint voice of a mother yelling that if they didn't leave in another five minutes, she would not treat them to candy.
She glanced at her watch, saw the time, and gasped. She was running late.
The rest of the scenery was a blur to her. She remembered the sounds of her shoes splashing puddles and in one moment, she almost slipped. She remembered that as she got closer to the shopping mall, more and more people appeared on her streets and it became difficult to manuever past all of them. And her umbrella kept getting in the way.
Random puddles scattered the front of the shopping mall. The lamps were on because of the dim sky. And he stood in front of the water fountain, which she realized was not even functioning, a black umbrella in his hands. She remembered the concrete floor consisted of grey, diamond-shaped tiles. She remembered the statue of the water fountain was covered in moss. She remembered how strange it was that even at that moment, the rain, her wet clothes, her soaked shoes, and his black umbrella seemed more exciting than what was to come.
:~:
When had she closed her eyes? When she opened them again, the sky was much lighter, and more blue than before. But tints of dawn still danced in her sight. Suddenly, her stomach rumbled, and she realized why. About twenty feet away from her, a family had settled down and started to barbecue. She looked around and found a food stand. Getting up, she took out her wallet and walked towards it.
:~:
When she dashed down the stairs, the faint smell of tea and lunch greeted her. She stopped at the front door to take a whiff of the flowers that her father had placed in a vase just a few days ago before she went outside. They smelled of bristling life in the quaint world of change.
As she walked down the street, she remembered catching the scent of musky, moist plants. A guy walking past her had a lit cigarette, and he decided to breathe out the smoke when she was about six inches away from him. Attacked by this sudden whiff, she went through a few seconds' worth of coughing. At the site of the accident, which was only three blocks away from the shopping mall, she smelled something burning and saw that one of the cars' engine had overheated.
The minute she laid eyes upon him, she walked towards his direction. She past a food stand, catching a whiff of the goods, and decided that after she got this done and over with, she would go eat lunch at the cafe that was a block away. A woman who walked by her gave off a strong smell of perfume, which quickly dissipated when a gust of wind blew by right afterwards.
When she stopped with her body about five inches away from his, Syaoran smelled of Syaoran.
:~:
"You have no idea how long it took for me to finally realize just exactly where you would escape to."
Her eyes widened as she turned to look at him. She was sitting in front of the food stand, eating a sandwich. "Eriol," she stated.
He had taken the seat next to her and ordered a cup of cold water. "Sakura, how are you?"
"Why are you here?" she asked, ignoring his question.
"Because I remembered that this is where the perfect color of blue can be seen on a day like this. And though it is not your favorite color, once in a while, you still try to remember what that shade of color is."
She turned to look at him, watching as the wind played with his hair. She could hear the waves clash onto the beach and the voices of families, friends, or anything laughing and conversing as they enjoyed the day. She could hear his voice as he talked, and remembered that it has been two years since he came to Tomoeda to visit.
"I remember what was said on that day."
"Do you?"
"Yes. What do you think happened?"
"I think you and Syaoran know and I'll only guess inaccurately."
"What was the weather like? How long do you think we talked? How many people did I see? What do you think I felt? What do you think he felt? How wrong do you think you are?"
"Sakura, if you were what everyone said you were, I'm sure Tomoyo would not look as radiant as she does today."
"You're the only one to say that. You're the only one who wasn't involved to have ever said that. And I only try to remember shades of blue once in a while because I'm always surrounded by green. It's not a bad thing, but life needs variety."
"And as to how you two felt," he continued, ignoring the latter part of what she said, "it was probably content. Ease. The weight of the world was finally off your shoulders."
"You're assuming. This is what I have to deal with everytime someone mentions this. They have no idea what happened. And if they thought they did, they've completely forgotten. But Syaoran and me? We remember every word we heard, and every word we said. We remember assisting each other out of our chains."
:~:
"Sakura! Don't forget to eat!"
"I'm running late! I'll find some food on my way there. Bye!"
"In the downtown district, two cars crashed in the middle of an intersection. Police are there, but there is no telling as to when traffic will begin to clear..."
"So yesterday, I found him-"
"Sachiko! If you and your friends don't stop playing this instant, I will NOT buy any candy for you!"
"But mooooooooooooooom-"
"So what did you say?"
"I told her that it wasn't-"
"Hello. Please connect me to-"
"-which was ridiculous since-"
"-for sale! But I was too late."
"-food! I want some food!"
"Fine, we'll go get some from that stand."
"Good afternoon."
"Good afternoon."
"Did you wait long?"
"Not really. Crappy weather, huh?" Scowl.
"Yeah. I'm soaked. My feet feel uncomfortable right now."
"Me, too. Anyway, what do you want to do today? Some new movies are out. Or have you eaten yet?"
Laughter. "Oh, shut it."
"What?" Smirk.
"I can't believe we decided to meet TODAY. You have bad timing."
"Well, you didn't want to do this at school. But really, is there much left to talk bout?"
"I didn't want to do this at school because gossip travels faster than the speed of light. And actually, I think we reached an understanding waaay before today. But this is mainly so I can at least feel like SOME book has closed."
Laughter. "True."
"I know this is coming pretty late, but did you ever think we were really going to do this, Syaoran?"
"Not until a few months ago. People change, you know." Shrug. "We've changed. I'm just glad it's a simultaneous thing."
"Yeah. I think this is a sign. If we can still be happy whether we are together or not, I think it's a sign."
"I did love you, though."
Smile. "Me, too. In fact, when I was younger, I thought we would be together forever."
"ARE you happy with this? I mean-"
"Oh, shut up." Sigh. "It doesn't matter whether or not I'm happy with this. What matters is how this affects both of us. But since you asked, I'm not crying my heart out. I'm a little bit sad, but... I feel pretty relieved. Like I can breathe again."
"Good. Me, too. Sakura, I want the best for you. I hope you find it, whether it will be in you, or in someone else's connection to you."
"Thank you. And the best of luck to you, too. I'll see you at school?"
"Yeah. What do you think will happen?"
"I think I'm going to be the tragic maiden of despair and nothingness without you. And you'll be the reluctant but selfish asshole who dumped me."
Laughter again. "Oh, I can't wait."
Two smiles, one hug, and finally, two different roads.
:~:
Eriol smiled. "Do you ever feel like tellling them?"
"The people who are involved know the truth. If my close friends ask, then I'll explain. But really, isn't it more than enough for me to know that I am happy? Self-realization was the key part to that day. It doesn't matter to me what stories others want to weave out of this. I'm not a tragic person. My life story is not tragic. Syaoran and I are still good friends and I know now, as I have known for so many years now, that this is more than enough."
"Good." Eriol stood up and swept his hands over his pants to wipe some sand away. He held his hand out to her.
Sakura reached for it and felt her physical state move up until she was almost eye level with his neck. He had grown again. She looked at her watch and found that it was two in the afternoon.
"Well, whatever the case is," Eriol started, "do you want to spend more time here?"
She shook her head, a small smile playing upon her lips. "I've missed you. Let's go back to my home. I'll get some stuff done and then treat you for dinner tonight, okay? How long will you be staying this time?"
The blue-haired male smiled at her as he started to put his shoes on. "Why?"
"I want to know," she said in a matter-of-fact manner. As she looked at his hair, her mind suddenly decided to say that it was the most beauitful shade of blue. Perfect. But still, Eriol was right; she didn't care much for blue.
"It'll be permanent this time."
She nodded her head, reaching for her own shoes, when she paused and turned to look at him. He was nonchalantly tying his shoelaces, but she could see that small smirk. She could see that hint of a secret, and he KNEW she wanted to tear it from him as soon as possible. "What?" she whispered.
He stood up straight again turned towards her. "I'm staying."
"You're... staying? Why?" Her voice was still soft. Still in awe.
He bent down and picked up her shoes. In the next few minutes, the only sound that came out of them was soft breathing. Soft breathing that was drowned out by the blue ocean waves, light pale breeze, and the fact that she still couldn't get over how gorgeous his hair perfect blue hair swayed with the life of their surroundings. She stared down at him, and he stared down at her shoes. When he stood up again, he reached for her hand and began to lead her to the bus stop.
"How about you tell me the truth of that day, and I'll tell you the truth as to why I'm staying?"
Actually, his voice had a perfect tone to it as well.
She frowned. "That doesn't sound like a fair exchange."
He shrugged. "Sakura, do you think I'm worth it?"
"Eriol, I've known you for too many years to even TRY to answer that question with anything less than a term paper's worth of length. But for now, I'll just say this: of COURSE you're worth it."
Smile. "Then it'll be a fair exchange. Truths, after all, tend to be worth more than just mere pennies."