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 I'm flying to Portland today... 3ish.  I am pretty excited about it... I've wanted to visit Portland for like uhh... the last 5+ years?  I've convinced myself possibly well before that even that I wanted to move to the Pacific Northwest.  This trip will give me a better idea if that's true I'm sure.  I'll be visiting / staying with my friend Adnan ( Read more... )

there wasn't enough pain in my life right now between th spider bites... relationship troubles... life in general... so I went and got another tattoo... another BIG tattooo.... good job me.  It looks really good though... didn't finish it tonight... I was just way too worn out... I kept sort of falling asleep on the drive home... i'm tired to the ( Read more... )

I'm trying... and I'm trying... and oh god we'll see what happens.  This is important to me... so important I can't put into words.  One way or another I want things to be okay.  I would prefer it to be together... but there is love this time so great that I want the very best... even if it's not me... god I just hope it is though... i want to fix ( Read more... )

i'm not ready

up and down and over and under... things are falling... things hurt... some more than others... and i'm so tired... life has worn me down so hard...  don't I deserve something good for once?... don't we deserve something good?... i'm waiting for things to stop falling... I can see through to the other side and everything is fine... everything is ( Read more... )

it's that slight roaring sound ( Read more... )

...I'm going to sleep.

I'm not sure what part or parts of today is contributing to it... but I feel an overwhelming sadness right now.  I can't shake it and it just drives home all the things that aren't as they should be right now in my life... things I'm trying desperately to fix but have no direct control over.  I'm presented with the option of staying awake and being ( Read more... )

I still have this horrible cough that is quite obnoxious and I'm more than done with it... DONE.
So this past weekend I drove back to Missouri to help Whitney move back to school.  I got into town Friday and we gave her dad a Wii we bought him so that he would have something fun to do while he's laid up with his chemo.  We got him Wii Play and Big ( Read more... )