50 movies and it's only June
Netflix is the crack. Bad horror on demand. i think I'm trying for 100 movies this year.
1) Into the woods. Stage production. Famous fairy tale characters come together in Sondheim's musical. Bernadette Peters stars. Really entertaining, music very complex. Little Red Riding hood steals the show.(p)
2) Fiddler on the Roof. Traditions are changing everywhere as Tevye the Dairyman deals with five daughters and Russian Pogroms. (p)
3) The Many Faces of Christopher Lee. The veteran actor talks about his career, and shows off trophies of it, including Dracula's ring and the last extant piece of the Wicker Man. (N/A)
4) The Legend of Billie Jean. When the rich kids trash her brother's scooter, Billie Jean wages a one-girl crusade for justice. Helen and Christian Slater, Yeardley Smith looking all of 10. And one of the best Pat Benatar songs ever.(p)
5) Dreams in the Witch House. One of the Masters of Horror series, this gorey, sexualized Lovecraqft adaptation actually works quite well. A student rents the cheapest room he can find, only to be haunted by the long-dead Keziah and her familiar, Brown Jenkin. (f, 2)
6) The A Team. I was a fan of the TV series. This was a worthy successor. Liam Neeson was perfect for Hannibal and the rest of the cast did a bangup job. Some nice meta with Reginald Barkley starring in The Greater Escape. Big dumb action movie, and it was perfect. (f, 1)
7) Halloween. This was the original and I had never seen it. Minimal gore, lots and lots of suspense. Jamie Lee Curtis turns in an excellent screen debut. (p)
8) Dorian Gray. Ben Barnes is beautiful and evil in this remake. The story is classic, with some updating. We see ALL of Dorian's debauchery, including some same-sex interludes. Quite yummy and lush. (f,2)
9) Clash of the Titans. Big CGI retelling/mangling of the Perseus myth. Grimmer than the 80s version, much more Nietzschian. Really like the Medusa in this one. (p)
10) Cloudy with a chance of Meatballs. I like the book this is based on and the movie takes some of the same ideas, but doesn't stay true. Cute love story added in, plus the typical winning Dad's approval theme. (f, 2)
11) Batman Begins. Christian Bale in typical origin story action movie with Morgan Freeman doing a Q style part.(f,1)
12) Machete. I wanted to see this from the moment I saw the fake trailer in front of Planet Terror. And it was just as awesome as expected. A renegade federale seeks revenge on those who killed his family. Violent, gory, nudity, and an on-camera crucifixion. But terrific. Lots of big names and strong women. Michelle Rodriguez is fabulous and Danny Trejo, although an ugly man, is ungodly hot. Bonus for Lindsay Lohan in a nun's habot with a big gun. Most memorable scene? the lowrider cars bouncing outside the gate like a pack of wild animals. (p)
13) The Jacket. A damaged Iraq War I vet is sentenced to an asylum where he is experimented on, and accidentally sees the future. AKA Kris Kristofferson plays with Adrien Brody's mind. Good film, some medical squickage. (p)
14) Cats Don't Dance. Animated tale of a cat who wants to be a movie star but finds one Dora Dimple firmly in his way. (f, 2)
15) Karate Kid. Will Smith's son takes lessons from Jackie Chan to defeat the bullies. (f,2)
16) Zombie Strippers. Ridiculous grindhouse piece about a bar making money on undead strippers, and stashing their undead customers in a cage downstairs. Yeah. Because that could not POSSIBLY go wrong... Gross, exploitative, and great fun (p)
17) Gangs of New York. Revenge tale of gang warfare over New York's Five Points during the draft riots of 1863. Leonardo DiCaprio is great, Daniel Day Lewis is brilliant. (f, 2)
18) White Oleander. Psychologically nasty piece about a mother and daughter as the daughter endures foster homes while mother is imprisoned. Michelle Pfeiffer does sociopath extremely well. I watched this thinking "Now I understand Signi and Gerda better. It will help in the next Nick book." (p)
19) The Spy Next Door. Jackie Chan's neighbor leaves him in charge of her three kids. Wackiness ensues. Entertaining, funny and entirely predictable. (p)
20) UHF. George Newman (Weird Al Yankovic) runs a TV station for his uncle against the corrupt network affiliate. Goofy, classic underdog story. (f,3)
21) Freakonomics. Documentary based on the books. Covers ethnic names, cheating teachers/sumo wrestlers, whether kids can be bribed into better performance (Confirmed Mudd's hypothesis on this: the bubble-kids, those almost passing, will work their tails off. The ones with no hope of passing won't bother) and why crime dropped in the 90s. (my statement: baby boomers aged out of it, and we baby busters couldn't continue their levels)
22) Despicable Me. Cute tale of a supervillain who adopts three little girls. (p)
23) 3:10 to Yuma. They so didn't even make me work for it with this one. Onelegged rancher takes an outlaw to the prison train. (f, 2)
24) Bambi. Oli was griping that she hadn't seen most of the Disney classics, so we'll be watching them. This is gorgeously animated, if a bit thin on plot. (f,2)
25) The Crazies. Cheap horror about a town where something in the water makes people homicidal. (p)
26) Jesus Christ Superstar. The 2000 version, all technofascist homoeroticism.
27) Charge of the Light Brigade. Quasi historical movie about the charge at Balaklava.This movie is the reason you see the disclaimer "No animals were harmed in the making of this film." (f, 2)
28) Tombstone. Entertaining western about the showdown at the OK corral. Interesting mix of actors. (p)
29) Repo: The Genetic Opera. In the dark future, everyone experiences organ failure, everyone gets transplants and everyone is in debt to GeneCo. And if one falls behind on payments, Geneco can repossess the organs. Opera, not really any dialogue. (p)
30) Dagon.Adaptation of The Shadow over Innsmouth, For a low budget movie, handled very well. Good effects, strong acting and big kudos to the Innsmouth folk for not blinking while on camera. (p)
31) Hairspray. Overweight girl becomes dancer on popular TV show. Remake with John Travolta in the Divine role. (p)
32) 30 Days of Night. Vampires take over and arctic town. Dreary and dull. (f, 3)
33) Coraline. Horror movie for kids about a girl who finds a way between worlds and a parallel place with another mother and father. But all is not as it seems. A little scray for kid fare, but really good. (p)
34) Rent. Musical about a group of drifter artists trying to keep the building they are squatting in. Quite meh. I like The Tango Maureen. (p)
35) Candyman. Very good horror film about the power of rumor and urban legend. Based on a Clive Barker story. (p)
36) The Fox and the Hound. One of the lesser Disney pictures of the 70s, this chronicles the unlikely friendship of a fox kit and a hound pup. Layered animation but weak story. (f, 3)
37) Casanova. Heath Ledger as the famous Italian lover as he woos and wins the woman of his dreams. Entertaining and very pretty to watch. (f, 3)
38) Trick r Treat.Monster mash in which a small town goes to Hell on Halloween. Psycho killers, werewolves, vampires, undead, they're all out to play. Anna Paquin stars. (p)
39) The people under the stairs. A boy accompanies two men on a burglery only to discover the ghetto landlords have been stealing and "raising" children, with bizarre punishment and keeping them locked under the stairs. (p)
40) Tangled. Disnified Rapunzel...it wasn't horrible. Much more action adventurey, much less with the eyes-gouged-out-by-thorns. (p)
41) Dark Knight. Second Bale Batman with Heath Ledger as the Joker. Too long. Too many explosions. Some good psych stuff, and they didn't even make me work for it... (f, 2)
42) Up. An old balloon seller follows his wife's dream and goes to South America, but childhood heroes have feet of clay and dreams turn into nightmares. The newsreel adventurer is totally Errol Flynn. (f,1)
43) Dark Harbor. A bickering couple goes out to the Island for a weekend, but plans are derailed by a mysterious young man. Alan Rickman and Norman Reedus and a script easily as brutal as Who's Afraid of Virginia Woolf. (f,1)
44) Basket Case. A young man and his deformed twin seek gory revenge on the doctors that separated them. Painfully 1982 grindhouse. (f, 3. Mama and the tutor talk about her qualifications but only as they relate to Dwayne)
45) Vampires Suck. *headdesk* Blame Oli. The best part of this was the Team Edward/Team Jacob rumble.
46) Vampire Circus. 1972 Hammer piece about a town under plague quarantine who receives a mysterious carnival visit. Robin Sachs (Ethan from Buffy) and Lalla Ward (Ramana, companion of Dr., Four) as gorgeous twin acrobats. Dave Prowse (Darth Vader) as the strongman. And Robert Tayman as the gayest gay vamp who ever vamped. I so did not buy the heterosexual sex scene he has. The power of 70s hair overwhelms naked Hammer girls.Anthony Higgens is gorgeous as Emil. Sexy, stylish with the buckest of Hammer blood one expects. (missed most of the dialogue, so no telling)
47) Young Sherlock Holmes. This was a trip down memory lane and a fairly intense one. Excellent bit of filmed fanfic. (Anthony Higgens is in this too, as Professor Rathe/Moriarty) Holmes and Watson meet at boarding school. (p, although they talk about a dog)
48) Lost Boys: The Thirst. The Frog brothers are recruited by a paranormal romance writer to rescue her brother who disappeared at a vampire rave. Interesting concept, retread script. Two excellent moments, and they both belong to Allan Frog. (f,2)
49) Class of Nuke'em High. Cult film about toxic waste turning the honor society into Mad Max rejects. Entertaining. Very 80s. (p)
50) Session 9. An asbestos clean up crew takes on an abandoned mental hospital, but one of them is listening to tapes of a MPD woman's therapy sessions. Slow, but tense. Very good. (f,1)
51) Practical Magic. A pair of sisters live with their witchy aunts after their mother's death and must deal with the family curse that any man they love will die. Moderately accurate depiction of witchcraft, super hot Nicole Kidman licking Sandra Bullock's neck, and Stockard Channing being absolutely fabulous. BETTER THAN THE BOOK! (p)
1) Into the woods. Stage production. Famous fairy tale characters come together in Sondheim's musical. Bernadette Peters stars. Really entertaining, music very complex. Little Red Riding hood steals the show.(p)
2) Fiddler on the Roof. Traditions are changing everywhere as Tevye the Dairyman deals with five daughters and Russian Pogroms. (p)
3) The Many Faces of Christopher Lee. The veteran actor talks about his career, and shows off trophies of it, including Dracula's ring and the last extant piece of the Wicker Man. (N/A)
4) The Legend of Billie Jean. When the rich kids trash her brother's scooter, Billie Jean wages a one-girl crusade for justice. Helen and Christian Slater, Yeardley Smith looking all of 10. And one of the best Pat Benatar songs ever.(p)
5) Dreams in the Witch House. One of the Masters of Horror series, this gorey, sexualized Lovecraqft adaptation actually works quite well. A student rents the cheapest room he can find, only to be haunted by the long-dead Keziah and her familiar, Brown Jenkin. (f, 2)
6) The A Team. I was a fan of the TV series. This was a worthy successor. Liam Neeson was perfect for Hannibal and the rest of the cast did a bangup job. Some nice meta with Reginald Barkley starring in The Greater Escape. Big dumb action movie, and it was perfect. (f, 1)
7) Halloween. This was the original and I had never seen it. Minimal gore, lots and lots of suspense. Jamie Lee Curtis turns in an excellent screen debut. (p)
8) Dorian Gray. Ben Barnes is beautiful and evil in this remake. The story is classic, with some updating. We see ALL of Dorian's debauchery, including some same-sex interludes. Quite yummy and lush. (f,2)
9) Clash of the Titans. Big CGI retelling/mangling of the Perseus myth. Grimmer than the 80s version, much more Nietzschian. Really like the Medusa in this one. (p)
10) Cloudy with a chance of Meatballs. I like the book this is based on and the movie takes some of the same ideas, but doesn't stay true. Cute love story added in, plus the typical winning Dad's approval theme. (f, 2)
11) Batman Begins. Christian Bale in typical origin story action movie with Morgan Freeman doing a Q style part.(f,1)
12) Machete. I wanted to see this from the moment I saw the fake trailer in front of Planet Terror. And it was just as awesome as expected. A renegade federale seeks revenge on those who killed his family. Violent, gory, nudity, and an on-camera crucifixion. But terrific. Lots of big names and strong women. Michelle Rodriguez is fabulous and Danny Trejo, although an ugly man, is ungodly hot. Bonus for Lindsay Lohan in a nun's habot with a big gun. Most memorable scene? the lowrider cars bouncing outside the gate like a pack of wild animals. (p)
13) The Jacket. A damaged Iraq War I vet is sentenced to an asylum where he is experimented on, and accidentally sees the future. AKA Kris Kristofferson plays with Adrien Brody's mind. Good film, some medical squickage. (p)
14) Cats Don't Dance. Animated tale of a cat who wants to be a movie star but finds one Dora Dimple firmly in his way. (f, 2)
15) Karate Kid. Will Smith's son takes lessons from Jackie Chan to defeat the bullies. (f,2)
16) Zombie Strippers. Ridiculous grindhouse piece about a bar making money on undead strippers, and stashing their undead customers in a cage downstairs. Yeah. Because that could not POSSIBLY go wrong... Gross, exploitative, and great fun (p)
17) Gangs of New York. Revenge tale of gang warfare over New York's Five Points during the draft riots of 1863. Leonardo DiCaprio is great, Daniel Day Lewis is brilliant. (f, 2)
18) White Oleander. Psychologically nasty piece about a mother and daughter as the daughter endures foster homes while mother is imprisoned. Michelle Pfeiffer does sociopath extremely well. I watched this thinking "Now I understand Signi and Gerda better. It will help in the next Nick book." (p)
19) The Spy Next Door. Jackie Chan's neighbor leaves him in charge of her three kids. Wackiness ensues. Entertaining, funny and entirely predictable. (p)
20) UHF. George Newman (Weird Al Yankovic) runs a TV station for his uncle against the corrupt network affiliate. Goofy, classic underdog story. (f,3)
21) Freakonomics. Documentary based on the books. Covers ethnic names, cheating teachers/sumo wrestlers, whether kids can be bribed into better performance (Confirmed Mudd's hypothesis on this: the bubble-kids, those almost passing, will work their tails off. The ones with no hope of passing won't bother) and why crime dropped in the 90s. (my statement: baby boomers aged out of it, and we baby busters couldn't continue their levels)
22) Despicable Me. Cute tale of a supervillain who adopts three little girls. (p)
23) 3:10 to Yuma. They so didn't even make me work for it with this one. Onelegged rancher takes an outlaw to the prison train. (f, 2)
24) Bambi. Oli was griping that she hadn't seen most of the Disney classics, so we'll be watching them. This is gorgeously animated, if a bit thin on plot. (f,2)
25) The Crazies. Cheap horror about a town where something in the water makes people homicidal. (p)
26) Jesus Christ Superstar. The 2000 version, all technofascist homoeroticism.
27) Charge of the Light Brigade. Quasi historical movie about the charge at Balaklava.This movie is the reason you see the disclaimer "No animals were harmed in the making of this film." (f, 2)
28) Tombstone. Entertaining western about the showdown at the OK corral. Interesting mix of actors. (p)
29) Repo: The Genetic Opera. In the dark future, everyone experiences organ failure, everyone gets transplants and everyone is in debt to GeneCo. And if one falls behind on payments, Geneco can repossess the organs. Opera, not really any dialogue. (p)
30) Dagon.Adaptation of The Shadow over Innsmouth, For a low budget movie, handled very well. Good effects, strong acting and big kudos to the Innsmouth folk for not blinking while on camera. (p)
31) Hairspray. Overweight girl becomes dancer on popular TV show. Remake with John Travolta in the Divine role. (p)
32) 30 Days of Night. Vampires take over and arctic town. Dreary and dull. (f, 3)
33) Coraline. Horror movie for kids about a girl who finds a way between worlds and a parallel place with another mother and father. But all is not as it seems. A little scray for kid fare, but really good. (p)
34) Rent. Musical about a group of drifter artists trying to keep the building they are squatting in. Quite meh. I like The Tango Maureen. (p)
35) Candyman. Very good horror film about the power of rumor and urban legend. Based on a Clive Barker story. (p)
36) The Fox and the Hound. One of the lesser Disney pictures of the 70s, this chronicles the unlikely friendship of a fox kit and a hound pup. Layered animation but weak story. (f, 3)
37) Casanova. Heath Ledger as the famous Italian lover as he woos and wins the woman of his dreams. Entertaining and very pretty to watch. (f, 3)
38) Trick r Treat.Monster mash in which a small town goes to Hell on Halloween. Psycho killers, werewolves, vampires, undead, they're all out to play. Anna Paquin stars. (p)
39) The people under the stairs. A boy accompanies two men on a burglery only to discover the ghetto landlords have been stealing and "raising" children, with bizarre punishment and keeping them locked under the stairs. (p)
40) Tangled. Disnified Rapunzel...it wasn't horrible. Much more action adventurey, much less with the eyes-gouged-out-by-thorns. (p)
41) Dark Knight. Second Bale Batman with Heath Ledger as the Joker. Too long. Too many explosions. Some good psych stuff, and they didn't even make me work for it... (f, 2)
42) Up. An old balloon seller follows his wife's dream and goes to South America, but childhood heroes have feet of clay and dreams turn into nightmares. The newsreel adventurer is totally Errol Flynn. (f,1)
43) Dark Harbor. A bickering couple goes out to the Island for a weekend, but plans are derailed by a mysterious young man. Alan Rickman and Norman Reedus and a script easily as brutal as Who's Afraid of Virginia Woolf. (f,1)
44) Basket Case. A young man and his deformed twin seek gory revenge on the doctors that separated them. Painfully 1982 grindhouse. (f, 3. Mama and the tutor talk about her qualifications but only as they relate to Dwayne)
45) Vampires Suck. *headdesk* Blame Oli. The best part of this was the Team Edward/Team Jacob rumble.
46) Vampire Circus. 1972 Hammer piece about a town under plague quarantine who receives a mysterious carnival visit. Robin Sachs (Ethan from Buffy) and Lalla Ward (Ramana, companion of Dr., Four) as gorgeous twin acrobats. Dave Prowse (Darth Vader) as the strongman. And Robert Tayman as the gayest gay vamp who ever vamped. I so did not buy the heterosexual sex scene he has. The power of 70s hair overwhelms naked Hammer girls.Anthony Higgens is gorgeous as Emil. Sexy, stylish with the buckest of Hammer blood one expects. (missed most of the dialogue, so no telling)
47) Young Sherlock Holmes. This was a trip down memory lane and a fairly intense one. Excellent bit of filmed fanfic. (Anthony Higgens is in this too, as Professor Rathe/Moriarty) Holmes and Watson meet at boarding school. (p, although they talk about a dog)
48) Lost Boys: The Thirst. The Frog brothers are recruited by a paranormal romance writer to rescue her brother who disappeared at a vampire rave. Interesting concept, retread script. Two excellent moments, and they both belong to Allan Frog. (f,2)
49) Class of Nuke'em High. Cult film about toxic waste turning the honor society into Mad Max rejects. Entertaining. Very 80s. (p)
50) Session 9. An asbestos clean up crew takes on an abandoned mental hospital, but one of them is listening to tapes of a MPD woman's therapy sessions. Slow, but tense. Very good. (f,1)
51) Practical Magic. A pair of sisters live with their witchy aunts after their mother's death and must deal with the family curse that any man they love will die. Moderately accurate depiction of witchcraft, super hot Nicole Kidman licking Sandra Bullock's neck, and Stockard Channing being absolutely fabulous. BETTER THAN THE BOOK! (p)