061.
[ private | UNHACKABLE ]
The 31st. Merlin, should I visit the Hall or is that a soppy thing to do? It's not like he'll know either way, it's not like I can do anything about it. It's been ages since I've seen him. I wonder if it's true, what Tom said. I can't even believe I'm considering a word that bastard's said to me. But... do our lives go on without us back home, with doubles in our place? I never gave it much thought. That would make Harry 20 years old today, and Neville as well, as of yesterday. I wonder what I'm doing there. Well, whatever it is, doubles or lives on pause or not, I'm here. I'm still here.
And I'll be 19 soon enough. The 11th's coming up loads faster this year than I expected. Three years older than I should be. Bloody hell. It's wrong. It's all wrong.
I can't think about that now.
Maybe I could work on some dueling. No, no point today. Too distracted. I should fly. No, I shouldn't. I keep pretending flying can fix everything but it can't. It doesn't always work like I wish it would. Godric, why do I keep focusing on the crap things? The horcrux, how we don't know how to get rid of the bloody thing, that damned curse the other day that's still gone and set my nerves on edge. Dreams shouldn't
SHUT UP.
Nothing bad's happened. Not really. Not like last year. I mean, it's hard, it's been hard for a while, but you've done hard before. After a war, should just trying to live a normal life be so sodding difficult? No. It shouldn't. You're being an idiot. You've other things to do and nothing to worry about. I should sort out Amory's cats before they tear the cushions in the cabin to shreds.
Maybe I should do something for Harry's birthday. Not the Hall, that's too... stupid. Well, seeing to the cats in the cabin could be enough, he lived there, too. We all did. Might be a bit pathetic, though, sitting in his room and mulling over things. Especially after the past few birthdays of his. No snogging this year. I wouldn't mind it, and I'd bet my broom he wouldn't either. I miss him. I miss all of them. I miss the extra time we had here. But it's been years and it wouldn't do to keep on and on harping after him like the last time. I've gone on a few dates, after all. A few first dates with nice enough blokes from the bar. But that's all it's ever been. I suppose when you're faced with a few more than the handful of wizards at the castle, boyfriends are a little thin on the ground. Wouldn't my brothers be pleased with that, though? I don't much care either way. I'm fairly happy, I think.
Why can't I stop writing? I swore I'd stop doing this. It's like the diary. I keep saying that. But I'm just on and on writing about everything and I'm supposed to have a better grip on this all, aren't I?
Maybe I will fly to the cabin. Tend to the garden, fix up whatever the cats have gone after. A quiet afternoon'll do me fine, I think. Yeah, I reckon that'd be perfect. This'll probably be the last quiet moment I get to myself in a while, anyway. Especially since ...
---
I expect people won't let me get away with sneaking around my birthday this year, will they? If last year's, er, reactions are anything to go by. I'm not entirely sorry about that, by the way, but I'm making up for it this time, right? Fair warning of nearly two weeks!
This time of year's always been filled with birthdays and celebrations for me. Yesterday was my friend Neville Longbottom's birthday and today is Harry Potter's. Some of you might remember them from the last time they were here, though that was a while ago, now. And tomorrow would be my brother Bill's wedding anniversary! And the 22nd of August is my other brother's birthday. Percy. He's an absolute prat and I reckon I still hate him but I might miss him a bit too. Family's family, after all. But I'd sooner hex him than hug him if I saw him.
And there's me, I suppose. The 11th of this next month. Bit weird, though, and getting weirder each year. Not that that'll stop one of you lot from doing something ridiculous, I'm sure. Just don't do fireworks, alright? I can handle those myself. Courtesy of my twin brothers, of course, and what's a Weasley celebration without some fireworks?
[ooc; Affected with No Inner Monologue today! Not that you would know it from the way she locked the shit out of that first bit. :P But Ginny will be prone to rambling if she doesn't watch herself.]
The 31st. Merlin, should I visit the Hall or is that a soppy thing to do? It's not like he'll know either way, it's not like I can do anything about it. It's been ages since I've seen him. I wonder if it's true, what Tom said. I can't even believe I'm considering a word that bastard's said to me. But... do our lives go on without us back home, with doubles in our place? I never gave it much thought. That would make Harry 20 years old today, and Neville as well, as of yesterday. I wonder what I'm doing there. Well, whatever it is, doubles or lives on pause or not, I'm here. I'm still here.
And I'll be 19 soon enough. The 11th's coming up loads faster this year than I expected. Three years older than I should be. Bloody hell. It's wrong. It's all wrong.
I can't think about that now.
Maybe I could work on some dueling. No, no point today. Too distracted. I should fly. No, I shouldn't. I keep pretending flying can fix everything but it can't. It doesn't always work like I wish it would. Godric, why do I keep focusing on the crap things? The horcrux, how we don't know how to get rid of the bloody thing, that damned curse the other day that's still gone and set my nerves on edge. Dreams shouldn't
SHUT UP.
Nothing bad's happened. Not really. Not like last year. I mean, it's hard, it's been hard for a while, but you've done hard before. After a war, should just trying to live a normal life be so sodding difficult? No. It shouldn't. You're being an idiot. You've other things to do and nothing to worry about. I should sort out Amory's cats before they tear the cushions in the cabin to shreds.
Maybe I should do something for Harry's birthday. Not the Hall, that's too... stupid. Well, seeing to the cats in the cabin could be enough, he lived there, too. We all did. Might be a bit pathetic, though, sitting in his room and mulling over things. Especially after the past few birthdays of his. No snogging this year. I wouldn't mind it, and I'd bet my broom he wouldn't either. I miss him. I miss all of them. I miss the extra time we had here. But it's been years and it wouldn't do to keep on and on harping after him like the last time. I've gone on a few dates, after all. A few first dates with nice enough blokes from the bar. But that's all it's ever been. I suppose when you're faced with a few more than the handful of wizards at the castle, boyfriends are a little thin on the ground. Wouldn't my brothers be pleased with that, though? I don't much care either way. I'm fairly happy, I think.
Why can't I stop writing? I swore I'd stop doing this. It's like the diary. I keep saying that. But I'm just on and on writing about everything and I'm supposed to have a better grip on this all, aren't I?
Maybe I will fly to the cabin. Tend to the garden, fix up whatever the cats have gone after. A quiet afternoon'll do me fine, I think. Yeah, I reckon that'd be perfect. This'll probably be the last quiet moment I get to myself in a while, anyway. Especially since ...
---
I expect people won't let me get away with sneaking around my birthday this year, will they? If last year's, er, reactions are anything to go by. I'm not entirely sorry about that, by the way, but I'm making up for it this time, right? Fair warning of nearly two weeks!
This time of year's always been filled with birthdays and celebrations for me. Yesterday was my friend Neville Longbottom's birthday and today is Harry Potter's. Some of you might remember them from the last time they were here, though that was a while ago, now. And tomorrow would be my brother Bill's wedding anniversary! And the 22nd of August is my other brother's birthday. Percy. He's an absolute prat and I reckon I still hate him but I might miss him a bit too. Family's family, after all. But I'd sooner hex him than hug him if I saw him.
And there's me, I suppose. The 11th of this next month. Bit weird, though, and getting weirder each year. Not that that'll stop one of you lot from doing something ridiculous, I'm sure. Just don't do fireworks, alright? I can handle those myself. Courtesy of my twin brothers, of course, and what's a Weasley celebration without some fireworks?
[ooc; Affected with No Inner Monologue today! Not that you would know it from the way she locked the shit out of that first bit. :P But Ginny will be prone to rambling if she doesn't watch herself.]