Please excuse this story.....I have the IQ of a flobberworm.

[aroniwen]

HA! (I just had to take the liberty of writing a disclaimer for this author that I’m about to subject you to

Comments

[torch_light]

oooh, that story was... weird. Especially the bit about the ball. Weird weird weird. I couldn't get past the first chapter.

and, on the paranoia, i feel exactly the same way :S

[potter_lover456]

I don't know which is worse, planks who can't spell or tell grammer from their behind or planks that can.

[ghostofbambi]

Ha! I agree with that. Her spelling and grammar are good, but remember that she might have a beta to correct that for her..

Lily smokes in this fic... no, no, NO!

[potter_lover456]

I feel sorry for the beta if she did.

I only got to the first chapter, than I stopped reading. The wizarding world does not use ciggarettes(sp?), the men somke pipes and that's about all I've seen.

[annabtg]

I read the first three parts.

Call me a Plank, but that's not exactly the kind of fic I'd find flameworthy. I mean - it would be a good story if there was NOTHING about the balls. She's got Lily tutoring James anyway, and her thinking she's got a crush on Remus... there's your conflict, girl! Why add a 'mysterious stranger in a stag outfit'? And, I know even "perfect little" students like Lily can have some dirty secrets, but... this one's taking it a little far. Lily getting wasted while flirting with a thousand masked guys? *frowns*

As it is, it didn't capture me.

And, I admit her grammar and vocabulary was very well done, but because incorrect usage of language is my pet peeve:

"Do you have some telekinetic powers that I don't know about, or do I seriously need to get you out more?" she whispered.

"What?" she asked in confusion.

"You got the right answer and you weren't even listening.And that's a sign of telekinetic powers... why? If my ancient Greek doesn't fail me (which I'm pretty sure it doesn't), telekinetic means 'to

[cgn]

An excellent point about the language. You're right, she wanted telepathy. And a beta reader is easily obtained for the purposes of getting it on FA. I saw it was on that archive and was a little ashamed of FA. ::shakes head::

Seriously. Smoking!Lily. Balls. Stab me now!

[potter_lover456]

Ha! I knew there was something wrong in that sentence when I read it, I just couldn't figure it out! Granted it was four in the morining.

If you are going to write, please be handy with a dictionary, even if its one from the internet.

[wrenifer]

Well I have to say that I read that whole fic. *hangs head* I think it was one of my first Lily/James. I have to say it wasn't horrible though the WHOLE ball idea is ridiculous. Thank you for the rant. It was wonderful.

[annabtg]

Oh, and I forgot something:

these people don’t want an L/J fic; they want a Hilary Duff movie.

WORD.

See ya,
Anna.