i know what you mean with feeling too embarrassed to talk about it. at the price of not being alone (both socially and romantically), i've put myself through horrible things too (and so do a lot of people). but i've never seen you as the type of person to do that..just letting someone break you down, or conditioning yourself to a really unhealthy situation. you have changed a lot in the past year and a half and the reason for those changes greatly revolve around the company u keep. i think you've already realized that you don't deserve this, but you're so used to it that you're afraid of what will happen once you let it go. sometimes things just dont' fix themselves no matter how long you wait or how much time you give them..u need to give yourself a little more credit here - you're in control of your life alone, there is no need to feel ashamed of the mistakes of others. love you.
rachel put it all perfectly, but i want to back her up.
no matter where you are and who you are with there will always be someone trying to ruin you for yourself. the trick is to know you are aready everything you want to be, you just havent let it all out yet. keep in mind the amazment that you put most people in once they get to know you. you have something so different and so unique that i couldnt even try to put it into words, sarah.
dont let them step on your fingers and keep you pinned to the ground...you are SUCH an amazing writer....why not re-write your life and put you as the main character that finally gets everything she wants and everything she deserves. give yourself the credit we have all been begging you to give and love yourself like you should. and no matter what, you have people under you that will serve as a net for every single time you slip...and we all do it.
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no matter where you are and who you are with there will always be someone trying to ruin you for yourself. the trick is to know you are aready everything you want to be, you just havent let it all out yet. keep in mind the amazment that you put most people in once they get to know you. you have something so different and so unique that i couldnt even try to put it into words, sarah.
dont let them step on your fingers and keep you pinned to the ground...you are SUCH an amazing writer....why not re-write your life and put you as the main character that finally gets everything she wants and everything she deserves. give yourself the credit we have all been begging you to give and love yourself like you should. and no matter what, you have people under you that will serve as a net for every single time you slip...and we all do it.
if nothing else, ill catch you.
love you always.
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