hate and love are inextricable. the more i love someone, the better i know them, the more i see the things they cant know about themselves, the cracks through the act that i dont want to deal with, and the more i come to hate them. the love still exists, but the things i cant stand take on a life of their own and my mouth runs away with my terrible ( Read more... )

hey i'm happy, dont think i'm not.
don't ask me why i'm crying because i really, really, really don't know.
my face starts to crumple and i turn it away in a panic, i have to run and shut myself in the bathroom to cry WHAT A CLICHE and whats wrong with me.

you laugh, he said, you think you're immune
go look at your eyes they're full of moon
you like roses and kisses and pretty men
to tell you all those pretty lies, pretty lies
when you gonna realize
they're only pretty lies
only pretty lies, just pretty lies

i cant help how much i love that song.
(and i'm dying for some pretty lies)

right now, this very very second, there is absolutely nothing wrong. in the back of my head there are doubts, suspicions that all these perfect things arent quite what they seem, but if i take my life at face value i'm happy ( Read more... )

i walked through the night but i wasnt feeling the magic. usually the simple fact of the dark is enchanting enough, but i was detached. it was like, you know how when you have a blister there's a layer of skin and then emptiness and then your actual foot? i was a blister. not in the sense that i hurt but in the sense that my actual foot/self ( Read more... )

i've been listening to love songs and reading the mermaid poems i used to love.

Who would be
A mermaid fair,
Singing alone,
Combing her hair
Under the sea
In a golden curl
With a comb of pearl,
On a throne?
i'm in a romantic state of mind but it has no focus ( Read more... )

DANCING ON SATURDAY NIGHT.


( Read more... )

i listen to their rehearsed resentments, their voices all blend into one as i picture them talking, their righteous indignation about this about that about you about me, it doesnt matter what, if they're of a mind then they will expound on it until the times up. then parts of it trickle down to me. i dont recognize them at first for what they are, ( Read more... )

drank a huge coffee and then sat on a swing in the park. i was freezing and the sun made me squint but i sat for a long time watching my shadow blow out smoke.

"FATTIES!! FATTIES UNITED NATION! THAT SPELLS FUN! hahahahahahahaha. I AM SOOOO FUNNY!"

-adrien