turtle turtle....
Let me tell you a story. There once was a little turtle...
How long ago was it, since we'd talked? It's had to've been at least three years, but I remember it like it was yesterday. The day he moved, he was sitting on his roof, crying to himself, and to me.
And that turtle was very sad, because it was different.
But I can still remember, even through his tears, still the sound of a song. I sung with him, through my own tears.
"So, you're moving? For real this time?"
"Yeah, for real. I didn't expect it to be so sudden, I'm sorry."
"Papa," said the turtle, "The kids make fun of me,"
I sung in my head. A sad, slow song, that would always remind me of him.
"It's not like it was your idea to move."
"Yeah, I know, but still... I'm gonna miss it here. It was..." He stopped, a lack of words. This was the first time I'd ever seen him speechless; normally his vocabulary was matched only by a dictionary.
"Peaceful. It's peaceful here." We sat for a moment in silence, and watched the rain fall on the moving van and the boxes of crap.
"Yeah. But I don't think I'm going to miss the peace, it gets a bit boring at times."
"Because I'm so slow."
"Hmm. Then what are you going to miss?"
"You, maybe? I don't know. I'll miss sitting up here, talking to you. I'll miss wandering over to the skate park, to hang out with Brain and Kevin and them."
"The people, then?" He had a strange look on his face, like someone who's mind is as crazy as the world around them, but for once the world around them is more still then deep water.
"No, not the people. God knows I won't miss Chris, Jessica, Jon..." His face contorted, and his song stopped for a minute, skipping like a CD player that had been dropped one too many times.
Asked Papa, "What's so wrong with being slow?"
"Don't think about them."
"I don't know what I'm going to miss. In all honesty this place was hell on me. I'd always thought that when I moved, I would run and run and never look back." As if that had a literal meaning, we both turned around and looked down at the moving men, drenched in rain water and fallen tears.
"Maybe you will. Maybe once you get to your new house you'll forget about this place, and me. And everything you taught me." He laughed slightly. The song picked up again, faster this time, a new beat with a new message the song was sending.
"I never taught you anything, stop saying that." His song was sending a message clearer than his words though, it said "I know I taught you everything I thought, but you taught me everything I know."
"I always come last in races, and Rabbit always wins," answered turtle.
Again, more silence. Deep, thoughtful. Pensive.
"Did you think we'd end up like this? When we first met we hated each other, and now we're..."
"I knew we would, yes. It was pretty obvious, we both had the same thoughts, same feelings, same minds."
Papa thought this over. "Well, would you rather be like Rabbit?"
"I've always wondered something." He didn't look at me, yet I could feel him staring at me all the same.
"Yeah?"
"Why'd you start hanging out with me? You had it all, you were happy, and yet you dragged yourself down to me. Why?"
"Would you rather trip whenever you try and walk, because your feet get ahead of your body? You have great balance, of both the body and the mind."
I laughed. "I didn't have everything. I'd been told that many many times, but I knew it wasn't true. I was missing something... when I met you, I knew you could give it to me."
He was silent, the volume of his song turned down. "What did I have to give you?"
"I'd been treated from a very young age as if I was better than other people. I was smarter than them, a 'genius,' and I was treated above all others."
Said the little turtle. "I'm even slow when it comes to thinking. I'm always last to answer a question, unlike Owl."
He rocked back and forth slightly, and started humming unconsciencely. I listened to him for a moment, recognizing the song.
"You didn't treat me like that. You gave me equality."
He nodded but didn't stop humming.
"Because you think things through, and look at all different perspectives. You have great understanding, and from that understanding, you have empathy."
"It was only a hopeless fancy..." I started to sing along with his humming, an old song we'd once read in a book, "It passed like an April day."
"But a look and a word and the dreams they stirred," he finished, "They've stolen my heart away."
After that we both sat, and besides the sound of the rain on our heads and the occasional hum it was silent.
And so the little turtle was contented with his answers, and went back to all the other animals the next day...
"You should be getting home." He still refused to look at me. He hadn't all day now.
"Home where? You're moving." I hated my house, always yelling and screaming. Hitting.
He shook her head, "No. Just... go home. I'll be leaving soon anyway, the movers are almost done packing the stuff into the van."
"I told you I'd see you off and I meant it. Anyway, I don't have to be home until 9:00, and it's only 6:30 right now."
Our song stopped. We'd run out of things to sing. The music continued, a quiet titter of rain on roof and shallow breathing, but no words accompianed it.
Rabbit continued to run circles around him, and Owl continued to answer questions before he could.
"You know I'd love for you to be able to come with me, but it's not up to me."
"I'll bet I could fit in the back of the moving van." We were joking, but at the same time I was completely serious. I would've loved to lay in the back of that van, doing nothing but sitting and listening to him, as his voice flowed together with his ideas and created an unimaginable harmony.
But the little turtle was happy, because he knew that he had great gifts the others didn't have...
I was getting frustrated. We'd both known for a while he would be moving, but the exact date had been undecided. We both had found out only yesterday.
"I have some bad news." His mother had said to him while we were outside, spinning stories and telling troubles, on a bright, sunny day, "we're moving tomorrow. You need to start packing your things."
I helped him pack up, and we shared memories about silly, trivial items as we packed them away.
The turtle could run as fast as he pleased without falling over, and had great mental stability, unlike Rabbit who got ahead of himself, and lost his temper. He could understand how people felt and why, unlike Owl who was wise only when it came to physical things, not emotions...
This day though, was not sunny, nor was it bright. It was rainy and cold, as if even the heavens were crying for him.
"So where are you moving?"
"Texas. Houstan, or San Antonio I believe. One of those History channel towns."
"At least you won't have to put up with the snow anymore."
He nodded, but said nothing more on the subject.
I took myself back to the first time we met, when we got into an arguement over the meaning of life. Two supposed geniuses in a battle of wits.
The rest of the class had great fun that day, they broke out popcorn and made bets and which of us would win.
And as the little turtle showed off his gifts, the other kids began to feel jealous, because they thought he was more special than them, but Turtle said...
We hated each other at first sight, but throughout the arguement we found we shared insights and feelings, and afterward we ended up being inseperable. We never went out, despite the number of friends who told us to.
"Why didn't we ever go out?" I said aloud.
"Because we didn't need to, we were more connected on an intellectual level than any couple will ever be on a physical one." He answered without ever missing a beat, as if he'd been following the same train of thought as me, and was expecting the question.
"Oh, right."
"It's time for me to go," he said, standing up and shaking his head of rain drops.
"Okay, I'll see you tomorrow." I wasn't paying attention, still lost in thought.
"Instead of becoming jealous of others for gifts they have, we should cherish their skills, just as we expect they should cherish ours. We're all special, and we all have something that makes us special..."
I was remembering how after we'd first started hanging out together, I'd thought we were better than other people, we were smarter than them, more profound then them.
"No you won't. But you might over the summer if I can come back and visit."
He told me I was wrong, we weren't better, we were better at one thing, but that meant nothing. Kevin was better than us at skateboarding, was he better than us as a person though? No.
"Oh yeah... I guess I just wanted to forget abut that. I'd better see you over the summer."
As if he knew what I was thinking again, he grabbed my hand and helped me up. He gave me a hug.
"Just remember okay?..."
"No one is more special than anyone else."