so now i've made the decision to walk behind you in the dark for the rest of my life. and i'll never show my face again because it's too scarred and bloody to be enough and i don't have the right stuff. all i have are the empty boxes to carry away your heart. and i think that tonight you will sneak into your house and i'll sing songs and wake you ( Read more... )

i met possibly a kid that's going to affect my life in some way last night, BJ. talked about how fall out boy was so good and how pete wentz sold out. talked about how mark hoppus is going places and how travis barker is just weird. richard dubourg likes travel by stars and he drove me everywhere last night. in which, my paycheck is still in his ( Read more... )

oh great, here i go again i'm stuck in this rut and i'm not sure how to begin. should i tell you everything? i'm feeling out of luck, so i won't see you soon because i know it's too soon for you to see me. if this is the last thing you do, just tell me that it's okay for me to have these feelings for you, and that it's normal to want to call you. i ( Read more... )

my teacher called me a good sport today. and i would have posted about how much i love her yesterday because we actually made one year, but it would have been only a reminder that it couldn't have worked out, and a reminder that i do not even deserve for her to look my way. but between you and i, my teacher is a liar. good sports don't cry because ( Read more... )

so long sweet summer,
i stumbled upon you and gratefully basked in your rays.
so long sweet slumber.
i fell into you now you're gracefully falling away.summer ended exactly how summer began, talking about star wars and smoking a cigarette. i couldn't help but to feel older and wiser while i threw my last cigarette butt of the summer. i feel like i' ( Read more... )

pack a day, one shot, and five beers doesn't mix well. i remember the first time i ever met dan grudo. cypress hall, nearly four years ago. my first local show ever: soliet green, skinkrawl, and the sofa kings. i always wanted to be a rockstar, i guess. but it really didn't hit me as hard until i saw richard dubourg on the ground with his sunburst ( Read more... )

[i found a journal i was keeping for english class in fifth grade.]

alone there i am on the hill alone... sometimes people come up and i make friends... then, my friends make new friends and i'm alone again ( Read more... )

i remember a scene before brandon shock ( Read more... )

when i die i want my last words to be: "i love you".
i hate to be just like everyone else.
but i expect her to be there when i breathe my last.
i believe hate is a strong word, but so is love.
so don't say it too much, for it'll loose it's meaning.
and i can honestly say that i mean it this time around.

it's kind of funny, she says all the right ( Read more... )

at age four, i discovered music ( Read more... )