There is a sweaty fat man walking around the library.

[__holyshit]

I wish things didnt have the affect they do sometimes, I seem to react very badly to certain things when in reality those things didnt affect me at all, but then in a situation when I am really affected I really get isolated. There is a lingering discontent when assumption shows semi-true. Im not happy that I dont have my license, Im not happy that

Comments

[pinkeyefountain]

i'm sorry.
i'm so selfish.
i'm sorry.

[__holyshit]

no, you are nowhere near selfish.. im really glad you said all the stuff you did.. i got home from the library around noon.. i was going to come back and take it off, the entry, because i want the truth from you and you shouldnt feel selfish from it. if anyone should be sorry it should be me, im sorry nicole. I love you, im sorry. I didnt mean for this to happen. I was thinkming irrationally, i just want you to know that i am trying. I want you to know i want to do those things for you.

[pinkeyefountain]

oh, dumb boy. don't apologize.

sometimes i express things i don't necessarily mean. i wasn't trying to tell you that you weren't fulfilling certain needs or desires of mine - i wasn't even trying to tell you anything. joe, i knew who you were from the beginning and i have accepted it all. i don't want you to think that i, for some reason or another, think less of you. i know you're trying, and you're doing well. you already got your ged; you have plans, you have goals and desires - i know that you want to succeed and i know [or at least i think i know] that you want me to be a part of them. and i want to be. and that won't change.

i wonder if you even recognize half the things you do for me. it's a struggle to reciprocate so fully, i'll tell you that. but i do my best.

i love you,

nicole.

[__holyshit]

i love you