summer has come and past, the innocent can never last...
the first part of my entry isn't dandy and/or happy, so feel free to skip over it if you like. i just sort of need to vent. but there are pictures afterwards
lately i've been going through this weird depressed 'phase'...
but it's not so much depressed as it is comtemplative (hence the mood), pensive, and just kind of sad
honestly, i dont really know what it is that's bothering me, or rather if it's really anything at all, other than hormones
but i do know that the suicide bombing and israel a few days ago kind of got me thinking about a lot of stuff, even things irrelavant to the actual bombing...
i just miss israel so much, and i dunno, my point of view as changed about it so drastically since before i went there
on the plane there i just have to admit that i was scared about the arabs and bombings and such
and i didn't understand how people were always like 'you don't even think about it when you're there'
but it's so true--i got so caught up in the excitement of seeing my cousins who live in israel (hadn't seen them in 4 years) and my cousin who lives in germany who was having his bar mitzvah there (i hadnt seen him in about 9 years) that the scary thought of a bombing was completely, but temporarily, erased from my mind
the promenade my the beach, where the bombing was--i was there on my last night with almost every family member from israel... god i remember it so well
thinking about it made me realize how much i miss it all....
in my mind, there was always that possibility of something happening to someone in my family caught in a suicide bombing--but until now i hadn't really grasped the reality of it all
and what's weird is, i'm not scared or worried--i'm just upset, and i don't know what to make of that
and then there are all these weird withdrawals i have from everyday things
i just get this weird feeling and i'm not into what i'm doing anymore
and of course it's not always like that when i'm with my friends...
but when it occansionally does happen, it's not as if i'm just going to run away....
i'm just not the type of person who would just stop everything because i needed a minute alone to think
gah, i hate it
blah, i don't know, i'll probably look at this entry tomorrow and think i'm being melodramatic,
which is usually what happens
anywho, if you read this, thanks i guess.... but all this talk about icky stuff is annoying me, so onward
the more happy part of my entry:
ok, so yesterday i went volunteering with karen at her gramdma's place again.. haha it was fun
did some watercolor and played blackjack..... and took pictures, of course :)
the original of what we drew
our version... everybody saw awwwwwwwwwwww
we weren't done though... lol
me working hard on tracing... hahahahaha, you thought we did it free hand?! yeaahhh right
other people working hard on their art... a lot of them were really good
aww how purty.. karen's grandma in the background
us.. yay!
karen doing the karen face.... she's not very good at it... pshhh
karen talking during lunch :)
... cus we're just cool like that
then we took a walk because we felt fat... not a great picture.. :(
haha... karen's a freak
everybody say awwww again
eww... haha don't ask
tree is our friend
they were kissing, and i wanted some action... *blushes*
awwwwwwwwwwwwww... karen and her grandma
karen flicking off the slutty bushes.... haha jk, that was me... karen's hands aren't that big...
... they'll be anouncing their engagement any day now...
because we're picture perfect... duhh
wearing her sweater golfer style... and pretending to golf... haha get it??
our sexy shadows--we were still wearing our sweaters golfer style
... again
can you guess what i'm about to do?
J-WALK! karen was too scared to do it.. hahahaha
karen and i both got lucky that day...
scary picture... hahaha
awwwwww
awww again
umm.. yeah
karen kinda missed with the camera.. hehehe
karen's butt :)
and my butt :)
aarons party was that night... don't have pics from that, but look at eden's lj if you like god i miss all my kadima friends... roy was being his usual self... asking for hugs to grab my ass and not let go... lol that was annoying, but i still love you.. sam is MEAN..... but i miss him anyway.. it was cool seeing dorene, i hadnt seen her for a long time.. alex... i miss him sooo much... i love you all
and that's all.......
comment if you love me :)
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