On the Top

[_ares]

Title: On the Top
Author: nieded
Fandom: House, MD
Characters: Gen; House, Cameron, Cuddy, Stacy, Chase, Foreman, Wilson
Rating: PG
Disclaimer: Psh, not mine. What?
Warnings: Speculation about heaven and the afterlife.
Summary: This is the universe, he says while stretching his ropy arms outward towards all sides of the earth, but they are no match for

Comments

[theyreforrachel]

Oh, goodness. I love it.

[nieded]

Thanks!

[blighted_garden]

That was beautiful. I love the ideas you put into this.

"What do you want most in the world House?" That was an interesting line. I quite like the ending, having the angel, Wilson (I take it), pushing him over the edge. The fact that House doesn't recognize the warmth that's right in front of him. I honestly just adore this entire piece.

In terms of suggestions, there really aren't that many errors.

"Why is here anyway?" I think you may have meant "where"? I may be reading it wrong. Apart from that just watch your punctuation.

Ex. "He gasps; sweat building on his forehead as he rides out the wave of pain." Semi-colons have to divide two complete sentences, and in this case the part following the semi-colon is a fragment.

But really, if I'm actually giving examples of how to improve something in my comments, it's because the story really struck me =).

[nieded]

Ah, typos. Let's see, I'll go fix that semi-colon thing. Thanks for catching that. And... It's supposed to say "Why are you here anyway." Thanks for noticing that too.

I'm glad you liked it.

[nieded]

Thanks,

I think Chase was my favorite section to write, and I've never written het before, but the whole scene between Cuddy and House worked really well for me. Only House would get jealous over himself.

[nieded]

Yay! I'm really floored by that compliment, and I'm glad what I write is unique. Thank you.

[anonymous]

I too love all you write -- And hope you write more soon!

This one seemed really different from your other pieces. Not.. Bad different, but just different. Maybe the lack of H/W is throwing me off a little. :-)

The way you do House, especially his 'unique' relationships is perfect as usual, and probably why I love your work so much -- I think you play the 'damaged' relationships well.

[nieded]

Thank you Anonymous!

I think what it is, is that I've taken a very long break from writing House -- well writing in general. I've just started my freshmen year of college, so it's been hectic, but finally I got so fed up, sat down and pounded out three short fics. This is the one I liked the most.

Hopefully I'll get into the swing of things again after mid-terms.

[anonymous]

Mmm, college -- That might do it. :-)

Hopefully the new season will provide you your muse once more.