May Suck

May 02, 2006 21:30

once again i fall infatuated ( Read more... )

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Comments 14

kitestream May 3 2006, 20:01:53 UTC
kudos for the effort at a rhyme scheme. 'partaken' seems a bit forced, though. First stanza very nice. I'd maybe change to "too jaded" so that the grammar matches the next line.

I take it you had a run-in with the ex that didn't go well? Hope you're not stewing in it too much. The best revenge is to be okay without her.

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_blueice_ May 3 2006, 20:26:26 UTC
You are a natural born critic! And you understand me perfectly. Should I propose to you (kidding)

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kitestream May 3 2006, 20:31:15 UTC
Hey!! I'm not sure what that means.....I hope you're not taking it as being mean or judgmental. I always try to find something I can suggest to be improved upon - I figure a writer doesn't learn anything with the usual 'oh, that's so good.' I hate it when people do that to me. Not that I've been writing much recently......

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_blueice_ May 3 2006, 20:39:24 UTC
I mean I appreciate. What you write and how you write - that helps me a lot.
REALLY

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