A Place to Call Home-Part VIII
Yep it's the neverending fic. XD
Home is our comfort.
“Something happened between them I just know it!” Lily started to pace across Alex’s bedroom floor impatiently. “They’ve been acting strange for the past few days. They haven’t seen each other as far as I know. Especially because Dawson has been spending so much time at the house. He can be so aggravating.” She sighed in frustration, “I keep asking him about Joey, but he evades my questions. That’s a sure sign that he’s hiding something.”
Alex looked up from the game he was playing at the computer, “Lil, let it go.”
“I can’t. Don’t you understand?” She flailed her hands in agitation.
He turned back to his game, “Why are you so fixated on them? It can’t be healthy.”
“Can’t you see, Alex? They are the older version of us.” She said quietly which gained his attention.
“Lil….”
“It’s true! All the references in the Creek. The sub-text between them….it’s just like us.” She sighed, “What if we end up like that?”
Alex opened his arms, “Come here.” She sat on his lap and he wrapped his arms around her as she laid her head on his shoulder. He kissed her hair. “We aren’t them, Lil.” He pressed her closer, “It won’t be like that for us.”
“How do you know?” Hot tears rolled down her face and onto his shirt.
“I have faith in us. We can’t compare ourselves to them. There are similarities, yes, but that doesn’t mean that’s our fate.”
“I want them to be together…” She whispered.
“I do too, I’ve noticed the secret smiles they throw each other and the way they speak with their eyes. They love each other, Lil. That much I know. If they really want to be together they will find a way back to each other. It’s out of our hands and none of our concern.”
She leaned back and looked up at him, “Thank you.”
“For what?”
“You always know what to say and how to say it.” She kissed him gently, “I love you.”
“I love you, too.”
Home waits patiently in the wings of life, quietly awaiting your return.
Joey opened her eyes and groaned. She had a massive headache and the sunlight burning into her corneas wasn’t helping at all. It was a beautiful day, she could almost imagine the creek shining with light and hope. A hope that she no longer felt. She remembered the last time she had watched the sun set on the creek with Dawson. He had wiped a tear from her eyes as they vowed to always be in each other’s lives.
You and me, always. A flash of pain shot through her heart as his words flitted through her thoughts. Dawson. It had been two weeks since he had turned her away. Alex had been asking her questions about him, but she had carefully evaded them. She always found something else to do that would distract him. And herself. She rubbed her palm across her eyes. She wished that Jack and Doug were around to talk to, but they were in California with Amy for the summer. Bessie was wise and supportive, but she missed her friends. She had kept in contact with them since Jen had died and they couldn't wait to see her and Dawson when they got back in three weeks. If only they knew....
She could certainly live without him, but it wasn’t easy. Everywhere she went, she saw him, felt him. The other day she had seen him in a store window across from the street from her and she had run to the nearest tree and hid until she saw him leave. Her heart had pounded against her ribs and wrenched into an unrecognizable shape. He had looked so happy and the sunlight had danced through his hair. She had been captivated by his smile. Despite her pain, she wanted him to be happy. It hurt that her loss wasn’t affecting him. She wanted to mean more. She wanted to mean everything.
He meant so much to her. More than she had ever wanted to admit and living all those years without him had felt wrong. She had never felt satisfied or content for a long period of time. She had thought of him so often and always would. She had finally accepted that, but now he was over her. Over what they had. Over what they could have. Tears filled her eyes. She sat up in bed, she couldn’t lie around and pout all day long. Potters were made of tougher stuff. Life was empty without Dawson, but she would live. Someway, somehow.
She walked to the kitchen and poured herself a cup of coffee. The perks of living in a B&B. They didn’t have a lot of customers these days, but Bodie was doing well with the restaurant he opened a few years ago. He had been a good provider for Bessie. They had never married, but they acted like they werew. They had never felt marriage suited them and to them it was just a piece of paper. Love was their bond. She envied Bessie. She had felt being married would solve all her problems with Pacey. It had only served to magnify them. Maybe, one day she’d marry again, but only if it was right. Only if it was what she wanted, no other reason.
She looked into the living and saw Alex and Lily cuddled on the couch watching an old movie. Lily’s blonde head was resting underneath his chin and he had his arm around her waist. He stroked her hair as they watched the screen in front of them. She smiled sadly at the memory of all the movie nights she had shared with Dawson. All the times he had held her the same way, with so much care and love. She couldn’t look anymore, it hurt too much.
If only she hadn’t been so stupid. If only she had stayed where she belonged. She didn’t regret her years with Pacey. By the end they had both agreed they should have parted ways after Jen died. It had been the most honest conversation they’d had in years. It hadn’t hurt as much as this did. Just the thought of never seeing Dawson again was unbearable. It broke her soul.
It’s time, a voice whispered in her ear. She was shocked to realize it was her mother’s voice. So soft. So gentle. So loving. A voice she hadn’t heard in years. He loves you Joey girl, but it’s up to you to make things right. Tell him everything. Tears filled her eyes. It was the voice of an angel and she couldn’t ignore the message. She squared her shoulders, she was going to talk to him tonight.
Home is our true north.
He was at his mom’s house again. He had been there every day for the past two weeks. He was afraid to sit at home and think about what had happened. He had picked up the phone so many times, but he had always ended up slamming it back down. He couldn’t be weak. Things weren’t the same and never would be again. It was over, it had to be. That thought didn’t sit well in his stomach, but he had no choice. He had to keep her away.
Gail walked into the living room and frowned at him. He was acting strange and it was time to find out why. “Honey, we need to talk.”
Dawson jumped up, “What’s wrong? Are you okay? Is John okay? Lily?”
Gail laughed, “I’m fine, John’s fine, and Lily’s with Alex so she’s fine.”
Dawson sighed in relief, “I’m glad.”
“Come into the kitchen, I’ll make you a sandwich and you can tell me what’s going on.” She moved into the kitchen, not looking back to see if Dawson had followed her. He sat down at the table as she made him a ham and cheese sandwich. She handed him the plate and sat down across from him. “What happened with Joey?”
So that’s what this was about: Joey. “Why does everything have to be about Joey?”
“Because it is,” she paused, “you are my son and I love you, but I know how you are. You have that Leery stubbornness, just like your father.”
He smiled sadly, “Mom, Joey and I tried to be friends, but it didn’t work. End of story.”
“Honey, I watched you two grow up. I remember all the smiles and tears she has brought you over the years. I’ve seen you together and apart. Maybe I don’t know what happened, but what I do know is this: you two bring out the best in each other.”
“How can you say that? I’ve done the craziest things for her. I left L.A. to be with her because my dream wasn’t worth living without her. Then dad died.” A flash of pain passed through his eyes. “We kept messing up. Maybe there was a reason.”
Gail was quiet for a few moments, “I remember when your dad and I had been dating for a few months we got into this huge fight. We actually broke up. He called me everyday for two weeks, but I never answered so he decided to take matters into his own hands. One night he came to my bedroom window and tried to get my attention, but I ignored him. When I woke up the next morning he was still there. It had been thirty degrees outside, he could have gotten hypothermia. When I asked him why he did that he told me it was because he loved me and couldn’t live without me. That was the first time he said it and to this day I’ll never forget it.” She paused, “You do crazy things for the people you love.”
“You and dad were different.”
“Yes, we were. Remember what you said at our wedding Dawson?” Tears filled her eyes, “‘Love ends and begins again.’” Dawson reached out and held her hand. “Honey, don’t let pride keep you from the woman you love. You never know when you’ll lose them forever.” Tears streamed down her face.
“You still love him?”
“Of course I do. I never stopped. Just because he died doesn’t mean my love disappeared. I do love John, but I will never love anyone the way I loved your father And I know that you love Joey the same way. I’ve seen it in your eyes. You can’t let that go, honey. Not if you have the choice.”
Home is our comfort.
“Something happened between them I just know it!” Lily started to pace across Alex’s bedroom floor impatiently. “They’ve been acting strange for the past few days. They haven’t seen each other as far as I know. Especially because Dawson has been spending so much time at the house. He can be so aggravating.” She sighed in frustration, “I keep asking him about Joey, but he evades my questions. That’s a sure sign that he’s hiding something.”
Alex looked up from the game he was playing at the computer, “Lil, let it go.”
“I can’t. Don’t you understand?” She flailed her hands in agitation.
He turned back to his game, “Why are you so fixated on them? It can’t be healthy.”
“Can’t you see, Alex? They are the older version of us.” She said quietly which gained his attention.
“Lil….”
“It’s true! All the references in the Creek. The sub-text between them….it’s just like us.” She sighed, “What if we end up like that?”
Alex opened his arms, “Come here.” She sat on his lap and he wrapped his arms around her as she laid her head on his shoulder. He kissed her hair. “We aren’t them, Lil.” He pressed her closer, “It won’t be like that for us.”
“How do you know?” Hot tears rolled down her face and onto his shirt.
“I have faith in us. We can’t compare ourselves to them. There are similarities, yes, but that doesn’t mean that’s our fate.”
“I want them to be together…” She whispered.
“I do too, I’ve noticed the secret smiles they throw each other and the way they speak with their eyes. They love each other, Lil. That much I know. If they really want to be together they will find a way back to each other. It’s out of our hands and none of our concern.”
She leaned back and looked up at him, “Thank you.”
“For what?”
“You always know what to say and how to say it.” She kissed him gently, “I love you.”
“I love you, too.”
Home waits patiently in the wings of life, quietly awaiting your return.
Joey opened her eyes and groaned. She had a massive headache and the sunlight burning into her corneas wasn’t helping at all. It was a beautiful day, she could almost imagine the creek shining with light and hope. A hope that she no longer felt. She remembered the last time she had watched the sun set on the creek with Dawson. He had wiped a tear from her eyes as they vowed to always be in each other’s lives.
You and me, always. A flash of pain shot through her heart as his words flitted through her thoughts. Dawson. It had been two weeks since he had turned her away. Alex had been asking her questions about him, but she had carefully evaded them. She always found something else to do that would distract him. And herself. She rubbed her palm across her eyes. She wished that Jack and Doug were around to talk to, but they were in California with Amy for the summer. Bessie was wise and supportive, but she missed her friends. She had kept in contact with them since Jen had died and they couldn't wait to see her and Dawson when they got back in three weeks. If only they knew....
She could certainly live without him, but it wasn’t easy. Everywhere she went, she saw him, felt him. The other day she had seen him in a store window across from the street from her and she had run to the nearest tree and hid until she saw him leave. Her heart had pounded against her ribs and wrenched into an unrecognizable shape. He had looked so happy and the sunlight had danced through his hair. She had been captivated by his smile. Despite her pain, she wanted him to be happy. It hurt that her loss wasn’t affecting him. She wanted to mean more. She wanted to mean everything.
He meant so much to her. More than she had ever wanted to admit and living all those years without him had felt wrong. She had never felt satisfied or content for a long period of time. She had thought of him so often and always would. She had finally accepted that, but now he was over her. Over what they had. Over what they could have. Tears filled her eyes. She sat up in bed, she couldn’t lie around and pout all day long. Potters were made of tougher stuff. Life was empty without Dawson, but she would live. Someway, somehow.
She walked to the kitchen and poured herself a cup of coffee. The perks of living in a B&B. They didn’t have a lot of customers these days, but Bodie was doing well with the restaurant he opened a few years ago. He had been a good provider for Bessie. They had never married, but they acted like they werew. They had never felt marriage suited them and to them it was just a piece of paper. Love was their bond. She envied Bessie. She had felt being married would solve all her problems with Pacey. It had only served to magnify them. Maybe, one day she’d marry again, but only if it was right. Only if it was what she wanted, no other reason.
She looked into the living and saw Alex and Lily cuddled on the couch watching an old movie. Lily’s blonde head was resting underneath his chin and he had his arm around her waist. He stroked her hair as they watched the screen in front of them. She smiled sadly at the memory of all the movie nights she had shared with Dawson. All the times he had held her the same way, with so much care and love. She couldn’t look anymore, it hurt too much.
If only she hadn’t been so stupid. If only she had stayed where she belonged. She didn’t regret her years with Pacey. By the end they had both agreed they should have parted ways after Jen died. It had been the most honest conversation they’d had in years. It hadn’t hurt as much as this did. Just the thought of never seeing Dawson again was unbearable. It broke her soul.
It’s time, a voice whispered in her ear. She was shocked to realize it was her mother’s voice. So soft. So gentle. So loving. A voice she hadn’t heard in years. He loves you Joey girl, but it’s up to you to make things right. Tell him everything. Tears filled her eyes. It was the voice of an angel and she couldn’t ignore the message. She squared her shoulders, she was going to talk to him tonight.
Home is our true north.
He was at his mom’s house again. He had been there every day for the past two weeks. He was afraid to sit at home and think about what had happened. He had picked up the phone so many times, but he had always ended up slamming it back down. He couldn’t be weak. Things weren’t the same and never would be again. It was over, it had to be. That thought didn’t sit well in his stomach, but he had no choice. He had to keep her away.
Gail walked into the living room and frowned at him. He was acting strange and it was time to find out why. “Honey, we need to talk.”
Dawson jumped up, “What’s wrong? Are you okay? Is John okay? Lily?”
Gail laughed, “I’m fine, John’s fine, and Lily’s with Alex so she’s fine.”
Dawson sighed in relief, “I’m glad.”
“Come into the kitchen, I’ll make you a sandwich and you can tell me what’s going on.” She moved into the kitchen, not looking back to see if Dawson had followed her. He sat down at the table as she made him a ham and cheese sandwich. She handed him the plate and sat down across from him. “What happened with Joey?”
So that’s what this was about: Joey. “Why does everything have to be about Joey?”
“Because it is,” she paused, “you are my son and I love you, but I know how you are. You have that Leery stubbornness, just like your father.”
He smiled sadly, “Mom, Joey and I tried to be friends, but it didn’t work. End of story.”
“Honey, I watched you two grow up. I remember all the smiles and tears she has brought you over the years. I’ve seen you together and apart. Maybe I don’t know what happened, but what I do know is this: you two bring out the best in each other.”
“How can you say that? I’ve done the craziest things for her. I left L.A. to be with her because my dream wasn’t worth living without her. Then dad died.” A flash of pain passed through his eyes. “We kept messing up. Maybe there was a reason.”
Gail was quiet for a few moments, “I remember when your dad and I had been dating for a few months we got into this huge fight. We actually broke up. He called me everyday for two weeks, but I never answered so he decided to take matters into his own hands. One night he came to my bedroom window and tried to get my attention, but I ignored him. When I woke up the next morning he was still there. It had been thirty degrees outside, he could have gotten hypothermia. When I asked him why he did that he told me it was because he loved me and couldn’t live without me. That was the first time he said it and to this day I’ll never forget it.” She paused, “You do crazy things for the people you love.”
“You and dad were different.”
“Yes, we were. Remember what you said at our wedding Dawson?” Tears filled her eyes, “‘Love ends and begins again.’” Dawson reached out and held her hand. “Honey, don’t let pride keep you from the woman you love. You never know when you’ll lose them forever.” Tears streamed down her face.
“You still love him?”
“Of course I do. I never stopped. Just because he died doesn’t mean my love disappeared. I do love John, but I will never love anyone the way I loved your father And I know that you love Joey the same way. I’ve seen it in your eyes. You can’t let that go, honey. Not if you have the choice.”