vulnerable and trying not to show it
i hate wanting and not having
i hate having and fearing
it's the way it's always been

Expressing true feelings and emotion for another person is always a form of vulnerability, especially when no one knows how to accept that and reciprocate all that has been expressed for them. Expressing any type of fondness for someone and devoting time and emotions to them leaves you vulnerable. It leaves you open to be used and lied to and ( Read more... )

something's not right

it was night
rain was warm
dark lights
orange glow
turning corners
in my mind
looking down
turn and hide

shadows all come out
at this time of night
help myself
they stay to guide

what is here
a constant sigh
in emptiness
i confide

steps fade
no destination
it's all gone
steps fade
no resolution
i am gone

living this life, waiting to go
a one way ticket, waiting to show
run away..but expire slow

this is far from complete...

saw you there
there you were
still worlds apart
it's what you chose
there i was
walking in circles
visiting past catastrophies
this is how it has to be
always left behind
with a life on rewind
run
safety's where you aren't....

I pull my pud untill it bleeds ( Read more... )

i'm dying

the music is finally starting to come together. my project with brad the drums is in beginning song writing stages. i have an idea for the name, i think it's good. my home recording solo album is 2 songs in...out of 10. that should be done by november. White Trash Mustache

i had another dream last night. it seems they have been trying to tell me things.

"it was night and we kissed in the rain. you told me you missed me so much. then you left and i knew i'd never see you again."