We can't win all battles.

[_hemhem]

While we lose one savage beast, I'm afraid there are still too many in this castle. Rabastan Lestrange is leaving, and I could not be happier. However, the way some people plan to celebrate his departure is nothing short of overkill.

THAT POLTERGEIST. HAS SMASHED. A VASE. ON MY HEAD. He is a menace! Why can't we be rid of him?

Comments

[scandalqueen]

Oh. My. Gods.
He did it!
Congrats Peeves! But you didn't stick it on her head. You smashed it. Still well done!

[_hemhem]

What are you talking about? And why are you taking that poltergeist's side?

[scandalqueen]

Never you mind. Because you are on PermaPMS.

[_hemhem]

I can see that talking to you will lead me nowhere. There is not truth to that accusation. I can be pleasant when I wish to.

[greenmeadowes]

Sorry 'bout the vase Umbridge. Some things can't be helped, like evil little ghost men. And drunken parties to celebrate the expulsion of a certain vile little boy.

[_hemhem]

I should think drunken parties can be helped if we want to.

I'm sorry, I'm afraid we have not been introduced personally. You are...?

[greenmeadowes]

Whoops, pardon me for that spout of rudeness. I'm Dorcas Meadowes, seventh year Gryffindor. I already know your name from the scrolls, so there's no need for a mutual introduction, only if you want to.

[_hemhem]

Hello, Dorcas. That's a... very interesting name. Glad to meet you.

Don't believe a word you've heard about me. Most of them are lies.

[_cissy_black_]

HAHA. Go Peeves!

[_hemhem]

I'm not surprised that you would take the side of an idiot poltergeist. You would make a lovely couple.

[_cissy_black_]

*is sarcastic* Too bad that Lucius and I are getting married soon, eh?

[scandalqueen]

Whee! Somebody agreed with me!

[academic_hobo]

If Dumbledore were to expel Peeves from the castle, we'd just get another poltergeist in a matter of months. Still though, sorry about the vase.

You've got a very pessimistic attitude on life, you know.

[_hemhem]

The replacement might be a better poltergeist, one that keeps out of the way and moans as quietly as possible.

It's very difficult to be happy when there's nothing to be happy about.

[academic_hobo]

These are poltergeists we're talking about. And a Hogwarts poltergeist is all the repressed anger and mischief and all other bad feelings of every child that's ever lived in this castle. They don't hold with moaning quietly.

That's just foolish. There's things to be happy about.

[_hemhem]

You are absolutely right! What we need to do is --and this is utmost brilliance-- we need to get rid of the students. A school with no students. Wouldn't that be wonderful? No annoying little titchy things running around and talking about things they don't understand. Of course we can leave the students with sense. That would leave you, Miss Dorcas, Mister Allan Lovegood, myself, and a couple of others. We can have two students per House. That is, if we still carry on with the feudal House systems. Think of how easier education would be.

Give an example.

[_hemhem]

Hypocrite.

No, I will not be attending such a thing. I will be alerting Mister Filch about it, though. And I will be locking the door, so you can take your perversion somewhere else.

[_hemhem]

You said you hated the thing.

You will not bring any of your apes in here!