(no subject)
I think that someone saying "Yeah, she's always like that" in response to someone else saying "Oh, she was just being kind," is one of the nicest things anyone's ever said about me. Just the fact that it was so nonchalant and not rehearsed. What a simple, wonderful little thing.
I've been making good on my promise to myself to make at least one person feel really appreciated every day. Well, I HOPE they do anyway.
I really wish that people would be nicer to each other. Seriously, lately I've been all about peace and love, man. You would never expect that letting your anger go instead of just letting it out would feel so. fucking. good. I don't have energy to waste being angry at anybody. All I can do is let people know if they upset me, and how they decide to deal with it is on them. Whether they choose to fix it or freak out, I have no control over, so why worry?
I really feel like this week has started a new chapter of my life. Things have occured, and I just feel different about everything. I sound so spacy about all this. I feel so different about people, and things, and myself, and for once it's all completely positive and good. I feel like I'm growing up a little bit or something.
So I'm also a little bit scared. But at the same time, never more comfortable. I feel like I've found my place.
I'm with Rachel on the school thing. Hand me a textbook and I'll learn it. Why do I have to have someone ELSE teach it to me? Isn't it more valued to be able to figure things out for yourself? Sure, college is also about social experiences and hard work and character building and whatever else...but can't people be perfectly well-rounded, industrious, intelligent members of society without having to have a formal education? I don't feel the need to spend thousands of dollars and hundreds of hours for other people to tell me how to be a good person, and word hard, and be intelligent, and have a go-get-em attitude just to have someone else tell me that by spending this money and time, I have learned these things better than I could have by personal experience alone. I'm going to have to consider what I want to do with myself.
I've got some big plans for me, for sure.
Blech, I can't help but be nice to everyone lately. My heart is so full and my head is so uncluttered and my future is so bright. It's damn good to be me right now.