Ho-hum
First some angsting out of the way.
Last week my mother my diagnosed with (early onset) Alzheimer's disease. The doctor was only 90% sure, so I suppose there is little hope. Originally I was quite upset. I tried to hide my feelings and cried in secret/silence, but later told my Dad that I was indeed worried... I obviously searched the net for confirmation that everything will be okay, that my Mum still has a long time to live... Not that I found many reassuring answers. Basically... although it is fatal my Mum could live for a long time... or then not. I also found out that it is hereditary... or then not, because nobody else in my Mum's family has it, so it's probably just really shitty luck. (Still, chances are I'll have really shitty luck as well). After a day of distress and unable to feel anything but distress, I calmed down a little bit. I decided that there is no point in worrying since there is nothing I can do. Neither of my parents seem as distressed as my brother and I, and are more relieved that it wasn't a tumour. I take comfort in the fact that my Mum won't really end up knowing what's going on, so she won't suffer. It's going to be hard for us, mostly my Dad, but yeah.. at the moment things are okay. Stuff can happen fairly quickly, but we can't predict that. At least we're sort of prepared. At times I get upset again, but try to calm myself down. Things could be worse and it's no use worrying.
In general, I've decided to just... be relaxed. Okay sure, I have this pesky Master's thesis I should be writing, I'm at summer uni (taking courses I don't need), my room is in a mess, my personal issues are... still there, there are these new issues and obviously my useless and meaningless life will eventually end probably too soon, BUT if I waste time stressing and worrying, nothing will be done, so... I'm just going to take it easy... I'm not going to think what I have to do, I'm just going to... do stuff, do what I can and we'll see how it progresses. I have almost a year time to do my Master's (and even if I don't manage it, I'll probably get a half a year extra in addition to the year extra I already have... yeah, I kind of should have graduated aaages ago. The uni prefers graduates to failures, after all. :)) The other stuff: not important or out of my control. Okay, exercising... what I can at least. I need to phone the doctor, but hmm... that's uncomfortable, and I'll do it when I'm ready. (It doesn't affect my daily life, just some exercises and movements) Maybe I should go to a psychiatrist, but... yeah, I'll think about that later and I know I should see a gynaecologist eventually, but... as long as I'm under thirty? *excuses* My vaccinations?? I think I will eventually just get a routine health check-up and a lot of stuff will be dealt then. :)
Other stuff: I signed up for goodreads, but I'm not sure I want to keep it up. I might write some reviews eventually, but it's a pain remembering what books I've read in my life... I don't know if it's worth it. I also tried to set up a blog on Blogspot, but I really need the "cut" function and just can't seem to make it work. In general, I just suck at computers... and anything. I can't even use LJ properly. I think I should change my layout, because it doesn't seem to work properly, but obviously, I don't know ho. AH well.. I'll see.. *no stressing*
Btw. I'm looking forward to reading the Divergent series/trilogy.: I reserved the first book from the library and have the second (the third is not out yet), but if I don't get it soon, I might have to read the second first. I love this kind of "sorting". Normally it's really hard to place myself in any specific "box". For example with Harry Potter. :) Although even in universe, it didn't seem to matter, given that Harry and Hermione were in Gryffindor. :) Anyway, with Divergent I was actually sure that I'd be "Candor", so of course this is the result I get... and after thinking, it's actually accurate. XDD ( Afterwards, I did a few other fun quizzes with varying results... so yeah,)
You are Divergent- But Closest to Candor
You wake up in the testing room. Tori looks nervous. "That.. was perplexing. Excuse me, I'll be right back," she says.
Tori re-enters looking tense and pale. "You are Divergent," she says, "But you can't tell anyone, understand? It's very dangerous! Looking at your results, it appears that you lean toward Candor a little more than the others. Your honesty makes you a good candidate for Candor. Good luck."
Divergent Faction Quiz
For comparison:
If you lived in Divergent, which faction would you belong to? Candor
You value honesty above all else and love a good debate. You don’t see the point of sugar-coating anything and so you always tell it like it is-even at the risk of insulting someone or hurting their feelings. But the next time you get into an argument, try asking yourself: “What’s more important-being right? Or being kind?” Things aren’t always as black and white as you think. Facebook quizzes & Blog quizzes by
It does sound a lot like me. :)
Also: Yay Ribéry for making the Top3 for UEFA player of the year. The other two are the "standard" CRon and Messi, which alone is why they shouldn't win. Yes, they're fantastic, but it seems like it comes down a lot more to achieved status than merit in the past year and darn it, someone from the treble winning squad should win!! Yup, it's hard to pick an outstanding player from Bayern because they were ALL outstanding and shone together and thus in this TEAM SPORT they all (IMO) deserve it above the supertalented superstars, who btw. didn't manage to quite bring it against the superteams in the CL. (Not that CRon was bad and Messi wasn't quite fit anyway, but he was AWFUL)
Besides, Messi will get the golden ball again later anyway, because people lack imagination. *still mad that Sneijder was robbed in 2010*. Eeeh.. I can do some more angry boxing later.
On Bayern: I like the rotation even if it has been a little amusingly random at times, but it does seem that certain players will have to move on. :( Also... maybe I'm paranoid, but they're reminding my a bit of Barcelona. (NOOOOOOOOOOOOOO) I continue to be wary... It's unlikely Bayern will dominate the way they did last season and I will remember that awesome squad and their awesome style and their awesome spirit and keep it close to my heart in case well... things won't go as well this season. I hope they do and the team doesn't have to be overwhelming... Just competent and harmonious, despite the amount of pressure and expectations...
Last week my mother my diagnosed with (early onset) Alzheimer's disease. The doctor was only 90% sure, so I suppose there is little hope. Originally I was quite upset. I tried to hide my feelings and cried in secret/silence, but later told my Dad that I was indeed worried... I obviously searched the net for confirmation that everything will be okay, that my Mum still has a long time to live... Not that I found many reassuring answers. Basically... although it is fatal my Mum could live for a long time... or then not. I also found out that it is hereditary... or then not, because nobody else in my Mum's family has it, so it's probably just really shitty luck. (Still, chances are I'll have really shitty luck as well). After a day of distress and unable to feel anything but distress, I calmed down a little bit. I decided that there is no point in worrying since there is nothing I can do. Neither of my parents seem as distressed as my brother and I, and are more relieved that it wasn't a tumour. I take comfort in the fact that my Mum won't really end up knowing what's going on, so she won't suffer. It's going to be hard for us, mostly my Dad, but yeah.. at the moment things are okay. Stuff can happen fairly quickly, but we can't predict that. At least we're sort of prepared. At times I get upset again, but try to calm myself down. Things could be worse and it's no use worrying.
In general, I've decided to just... be relaxed. Okay sure, I have this pesky Master's thesis I should be writing, I'm at summer uni (taking courses I don't need), my room is in a mess, my personal issues are... still there, there are these new issues and obviously my useless and meaningless life will eventually end probably too soon, BUT if I waste time stressing and worrying, nothing will be done, so... I'm just going to take it easy... I'm not going to think what I have to do, I'm just going to... do stuff, do what I can and we'll see how it progresses. I have almost a year time to do my Master's (and even if I don't manage it, I'll probably get a half a year extra in addition to the year extra I already have... yeah, I kind of should have graduated aaages ago. The uni prefers graduates to failures, after all. :)) The other stuff: not important or out of my control. Okay, exercising... what I can at least. I need to phone the doctor, but hmm... that's uncomfortable, and I'll do it when I'm ready. (It doesn't affect my daily life, just some exercises and movements) Maybe I should go to a psychiatrist, but... yeah, I'll think about that later and I know I should see a gynaecologist eventually, but... as long as I'm under thirty? *excuses* My vaccinations?? I think I will eventually just get a routine health check-up and a lot of stuff will be dealt then. :)
Other stuff: I signed up for goodreads, but I'm not sure I want to keep it up. I might write some reviews eventually, but it's a pain remembering what books I've read in my life... I don't know if it's worth it. I also tried to set up a blog on Blogspot, but I really need the "cut" function and just can't seem to make it work. In general, I just suck at computers... and anything. I can't even use LJ properly. I think I should change my layout, because it doesn't seem to work properly, but obviously, I don't know ho. AH well.. I'll see.. *no stressing*
Btw. I'm looking forward to reading the Divergent series/trilogy.: I reserved the first book from the library and have the second (the third is not out yet), but if I don't get it soon, I might have to read the second first. I love this kind of "sorting". Normally it's really hard to place myself in any specific "box". For example with Harry Potter. :) Although even in universe, it didn't seem to matter, given that Harry and Hermione were in Gryffindor. :) Anyway, with Divergent I was actually sure that I'd be "Candor", so of course this is the result I get... and after thinking, it's actually accurate. XDD ( Afterwards, I did a few other fun quizzes with varying results... so yeah,)
You are Divergent- But Closest to Candor
You wake up in the testing room. Tori looks nervous. "That.. was perplexing. Excuse me, I'll be right back," she says.
Tori re-enters looking tense and pale. "You are Divergent," she says, "But you can't tell anyone, understand? It's very dangerous! Looking at your results, it appears that you lean toward Candor a little more than the others. Your honesty makes you a good candidate for Candor. Good luck."
Divergent Faction Quiz
For comparison:
If you lived in Divergent, which faction would you belong to? Candor
You value honesty above all else and love a good debate. You don’t see the point of sugar-coating anything and so you always tell it like it is-even at the risk of insulting someone or hurting their feelings. But the next time you get into an argument, try asking yourself: “What’s more important-being right? Or being kind?” Things aren’t always as black and white as you think. Facebook quizzes & Blog quizzes by
It does sound a lot like me. :)
Also: Yay Ribéry for making the Top3 for UEFA player of the year. The other two are the "standard" CRon and Messi, which alone is why they shouldn't win. Yes, they're fantastic, but it seems like it comes down a lot more to achieved status than merit in the past year and darn it, someone from the treble winning squad should win!! Yup, it's hard to pick an outstanding player from Bayern because they were ALL outstanding and shone together and thus in this TEAM SPORT they all (IMO) deserve it above the supertalented superstars, who btw. didn't manage to quite bring it against the superteams in the CL. (Not that CRon was bad and Messi wasn't quite fit anyway, but he was AWFUL)
Besides, Messi will get the golden ball again later anyway, because people lack imagination. *still mad that Sneijder was robbed in 2010*. Eeeh.. I can do some more angry boxing later.
On Bayern: I like the rotation even if it has been a little amusingly random at times, but it does seem that certain players will have to move on. :( Also... maybe I'm paranoid, but they're reminding my a bit of Barcelona. (NOOOOOOOOOOOOOO) I continue to be wary... It's unlikely Bayern will dominate the way they did last season and I will remember that awesome squad and their awesome style and their awesome spirit and keep it close to my heart in case well... things won't go as well this season. I hope they do and the team doesn't have to be overwhelming... Just competent and harmonious, despite the amount of pressure and expectations...