(Untitled)

[eternally_ozs]

I laid in Oz's arms, he wanted me to rest, but I couldn't seem to get any. Oz finally took the lead and called Jenny asking for some help from her. She didn't know what else to do, but give me more of the sleeping pills that she slipped me the night before so she brought a small handfull over telling Oz just how many to give me and how often

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[wolfedman]

Following Jenny's instructions I finally manage to get Willow to take a couple of the sleeping pills. As Willow quickly fell asleep in my arms I finally relaxed a little, knowing that she was safe and that she was finally getting some of the rest she needed to heal some of the physical pain

[eternally_ozs]

The shower was running and the steam rising from the hot water that I was letting fall on me I didn't even hear Oz yell for me. All I could do was stand in the shower and try to wash the dirty feeling off and out of me.

I could feel Angel's hands on me, touching me, violating me, the pain within me getting worse. I just wanted this to go away, no matter how hot the water was it wouldn't get me clean.

[wolfedman]

"Willow." I shout again and still get no response. Running down the stairs I check to make sure that no-one's forced their way in. Both doors are still locked. Willow wouldn't go out on her own, so where is she. My mind's racing and it isn't til I get back upstairs that I hear the running water coming from the bathroom.

I knock on the door then ask, "Willow, are you okay?"

[eternally_ozs]

The steam still filling the room I hear him yell to me.

"I'm fine, I'll be out in a moment."

I said with a forced calm tone. I didn't want him to know I was in here sobbing and frying my skin trying to get this feeling to go away. I thought if I made the water hotter it would go away, but it didn't, nothing works.

[wolfedman]

I smile slowly, hoping that this is a sign that Willow is maybe taking the first steps to recovery.

"Want me to make you something?" I ask.

[eternally_ozs]

"Last time I checked all you knew how to make was a mess."

I said with a small smile.

"No, I..I don't want to be a pest."

I looked away a moment.

[wolfedman]

"You're not a pest." I tell her sternly. "I wouldn't have offered if I didn't want to do it."

I place a small kiss on her forehead, trying to kiss away some of the worry and pain.

[eternally_ozs]

I sit up and look him in the eyes.

"Oz"

I said softly

"Kiss me?"

I asked, I don't know what was going through me, but his touch and his kiss made me feel whole again and I needed it.

[wolfedman]

I take the look on Willow's face as my cue to not mention Buffy again.

"I'm not gonna leave you Will. Not tonight. Not any night you want me here."

[eternally_ozs]

"O--Ok"

I said softly still considering the homework idea.

[wolfedman]

"Is there anything I can do?" I ask, not sure whether Willow really wanted to get some homework done or was just using that as an excuse to not think about it being night.

[eternally_ozs]

"Make the sun come back"

I said softly as I laid back down in his arms my body again trembling in fear.

[wolfedman]

"You need to sleep Will. I don't want you hurting yourself by trying to stay awake twenty-four-seven. I'm just worried and want to get better as soon as you can is all." I reply honestly.

I take her into my arms again and jsut hold her, wanting to let her know hw much I love her.

[eternally_ozs]

"You want me to get better on your time frame?"

I ask as I lay in his arms too tired and weak to fight.

"This isn't going happen soon, and for some reason I think things are about to get worse."

[wolfedman]

"I.. I just want all this to go away Willow." I admit.

"And I know it'll all take time, I just. I guess I'm just being selfish."

[eternally_ozs]

"Selfish?"

I ask wondering what that means.

"What do you mean about being selfish"

[eternally_ozs]

"Oz"

I whisper as I feel him get up

"You don't have to stay...not if you don't want to. I know the girl you loved is gone, leaving behind this shell, so you can go if you want."

I said softly. I would completely understand if he didn't love me anymore.