there is no hope for us
this year went so slow but too fast.
as much as i want to grow up, i'm scared to be an adult.
so much responsibilities, i'd rather have none.
one year ago yesterday was the first time i had a sleepover with angeluh and kristin mistin.
don't try to understand.
everything is changing, everything has changed.
a few days ago last year, dorksxarexhot was my only friend. we understood eachother.
over christmas break last year i sat at home the whole time and watched degrassi re-runs and marathons because alissa was in arizona or wherever her friend ashley lived. i sat at home all break doing nothing, i was and still am a major loser.
i still have not been able to live down my past. people who only talked to me a few times a year ago still have the same opinions of me and i don't think thats fair. `life isn't fair`, but if we have the power to make it as fair as possible, why don't we? stupid mistakes we make sometimes never leave. there is so much that i wish i could take back. "Well you do what you do and you pay for your sins, And there's no such thing as what might have been That's a waste of time, drive you out of your mind."
i have a feeling this break won't be very different.
i love getting phone calls.
i'm sick and tired of being the one that everyone lies to, and i'm sick of people keeping secrets from me. i don't see how people expect me to be completely open and honest with them, when they lie and keep secrets from me. its not fair for you to ask that much of me and not return it.
"thats like the gayest thing ever"
-She just goes unnoticed
As the crowd passes by
And she'll pretend to be busy
When inside she just wants to cry
She did everything to try and fit in
But the others, they couldn't seem to get past all the things that mismatched on the surface.
Take a little look at the life of Miss Always Invisible
Look a little closer, I really really want you to put yourself in her shoes
Take another look at the face of Miss Always Invisible
Look a little harder and maybe then you will see why she waits for the day
When you'll ask her her name-
So i've decided i'm going to become a stronger person. i already know that i can handle being alone, so i'm not going to worry about making people happy. i am going to try and be completely honest. i will make myself a priority. i will not be a pushover. i want to be more confident, but its harder when you're `the ugly friend.` i don't expect anyone to understand, and i hope nobody got to this point in reading this lame nonsense update. i might not update before christmas, so Merry Christmas everyone.
i remeber what it feels like to lay next to someone who cares.
you named a star after me, and said i was the closest thing to you.
+If I should stay
I would only be in your way
So I'll go, but I know
I'll think of you every step of the way
And I will always love you
I will always love you
You, my darling you..
Bittersweet memories
That is all I'm taking with me
So goodbye, please don't cry
We both know I'm not what you, you need
I hope life treats you kind,
And I hope you have all you've dreamed of
And I wish to you joy and happiness
But above all this, I wish you love
I will always love you. I, I will always love you.
as much as i want to grow up, i'm scared to be an adult.
so much responsibilities, i'd rather have none.
one year ago yesterday was the first time i had a sleepover with angeluh and kristin mistin.
don't try to understand.
everything is changing, everything has changed.
a few days ago last year, dorksxarexhot was my only friend. we understood eachother.
over christmas break last year i sat at home the whole time and watched degrassi re-runs and marathons because alissa was in arizona or wherever her friend ashley lived. i sat at home all break doing nothing, i was and still am a major loser.
i still have not been able to live down my past. people who only talked to me a few times a year ago still have the same opinions of me and i don't think thats fair. `life isn't fair`, but if we have the power to make it as fair as possible, why don't we? stupid mistakes we make sometimes never leave. there is so much that i wish i could take back. "Well you do what you do and you pay for your sins, And there's no such thing as what might have been That's a waste of time, drive you out of your mind."
i have a feeling this break won't be very different.
i love getting phone calls.
i'm sick and tired of being the one that everyone lies to, and i'm sick of people keeping secrets from me. i don't see how people expect me to be completely open and honest with them, when they lie and keep secrets from me. its not fair for you to ask that much of me and not return it.
"thats like the gayest thing ever"
-She just goes unnoticed
As the crowd passes by
And she'll pretend to be busy
When inside she just wants to cry
She did everything to try and fit in
But the others, they couldn't seem to get past all the things that mismatched on the surface.
Take a little look at the life of Miss Always Invisible
Look a little closer, I really really want you to put yourself in her shoes
Take another look at the face of Miss Always Invisible
Look a little harder and maybe then you will see why she waits for the day
When you'll ask her her name-
So i've decided i'm going to become a stronger person. i already know that i can handle being alone, so i'm not going to worry about making people happy. i am going to try and be completely honest. i will make myself a priority. i will not be a pushover. i want to be more confident, but its harder when you're `the ugly friend.` i don't expect anyone to understand, and i hope nobody got to this point in reading this lame nonsense update. i might not update before christmas, so Merry Christmas everyone.
i remeber what it feels like to lay next to someone who cares.
you named a star after me, and said i was the closest thing to you.
+If I should stay
I would only be in your way
So I'll go, but I know
I'll think of you every step of the way
And I will always love you
I will always love you
You, my darling you..
Bittersweet memories
That is all I'm taking with me
So goodbye, please don't cry
We both know I'm not what you, you need
I hope life treats you kind,
And I hope you have all you've dreamed of
And I wish to you joy and happiness
But above all this, I wish you love
I will always love you. I, I will always love you.