Comments | _nondescript: i'm a giver

_nondescript

i'm a giver

Nov 02, 2004 18:21

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Comments 13

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psh _nondescript November 3 2004, 06:07:01 UTC

covering it up won't make it feel any better -- it would only make it worse by taking away all of the natural anesthetics that come when girls see me hobbling out to get my mail or do my laundry. a quick story about how i was injured saving a little girl from being hit by a truck and i've instantly got a steady supply of ice, cookies and massages.

Amputation. viewsfromafurbe November 2 2004, 17:05:31 UTC

It's the only answer. All you need is a make-shift tourniquet and a handsaw, you can have that off in two shakes.

not likely _nondescript November 3 2004, 06:00:42 UTC

it's not like i'm trapped under a boulder or anything. i'll hold off on that pain and mess for the moment.

however, if i had a tool that could cut and cauterize in one fell swoop..

Re: not likely viewsfromafurbe November 3 2004, 17:33:46 UTC

like a lightsaber!..

hm. I'll get back to you when I get it built.

you know it's true dyanthis November 2 2004, 18:34:56 UTC

I've seen some nasty stuff, but this is at the top of the list. You look like a lepresy poster child. Don't you have an ice maker? Throw something cold on it.

actually _nondescript November 3 2004, 05:55:36 UTC

nope, i don't have an ice-maker, but i'm certainly always on the lookout for a cute one.

until then, i'll refill the trays myself.

Pushaw aquaminer November 3 2004, 03:20:17 UTC

That's about a double shot every night for a week or so. Maybe, just maybe, a double and a single. I hope you aren't being a pussy and skipping work for that.

gasp _nondescript November 3 2004, 05:53:43 UTC

you cut me deep there, friend. they'll have to amputate before i miss any work. and even then i'll bring someone to the plant during my lunch break.

and i haven't touched the cure-all yet. this one may be worthy of the single-barrell.

Explanation aquaminer November 3 2004, 17:29:01 UTC

I did say I hope you aren't skipping work...I was operating under the assumption that you would not let something like this get in the way of the "primer objective"

Let me know how it works out as far as making ice makers and cookie cutters appear..I may have to try it out.

_nondescript November 4 2004, 05:41:56 UTC

as far as ice goes, i'm past the recommended icing stage for a sprain. however, the pain and stiffness in the compensating leg has required fairly close attention. my harem rotates on 3-hour shifts while i'm at home to ensure maximum rest for recuperation.

my advice: go for gold and tear a ligament. it'll hurt like a bitch, but the healing period will extend way beyond mine, and therefore reward you with much greater ROI.

Ahemm aquaminer November 13 2004, 02:37:19 UTC

Update please

Re: Ahemm _nondescript November 13 2004, 06:08:43 UTC

i bowled a 114 last night left-handed.

Re: Ahemm aquaminer November 13 2004, 10:23:11 UTC

That is precicely double my best score (not left handed).