Themes 18 and 19
Title: Death: Losing the battle, Dark: Knight in shining armor
Author: Airiechan
Fandom: Kingdom Hearts [I, II]
Pairing/Threesome: Leon x Sora
Theme(s): #18 Dark, #19 Death, & # 22. Destruction
Rating: R [To be safe, mature themes mentioned. None sexual.]
Summary:
Death [Losing the battle]: Sora loses someone close to him and he just can’t bear it.
Dark [Knight in shining armor]: I wanted to give Sora a reflection Chapter since I was so nice to give Leon one and I wanted to focus this on the actual beginning of the game of kingdom hearts where Destiny Islands is torn apart and Riku becomes victim to the darkness, but Sora doesn’t. I guess I just thought it would be perfect for the dark theme I guess. CONTAINS KH SPOILERS [one not two] READ AT OWN RISK
Losing the Battle
Everyone was wearing black and Sora could hear sniffles and sobs off in the distance. He didn’t understand what was going on…everything happening so fast he just couldn’t get his mind around all the events that had happened in the past few days.
He didn’t know losing someone would hurt this much, but then again this was his first terrible loss. He had a few losses in the past, but it was no one he had known or been close with. He felt tears start to well up in his eyes, but he pushed them down.
‘I wont cry, I won’t cry, I won’t cry,’ he repeated to himself over and over. He had been told a million times before this day that it was okay to cry, but somehow he doubted it. He thought of crying as weakness and he wasn’t going to show any weakness, not now, not ever. Suddenly, a thought struck him, catching his premature mind off guard.
‘But if you show no weakness, you will eventually end up cold and heartless. Too much strength is a bad thing, but too little is even worse. Make your decision now.’
The voice that told him that didn’t sound like his at all. He cringed, how was he supposed to make that decision now? Of all times why did the voice pick now…?
‘Because, all the other times you allowed yourself to cry, but now you’re just as cold as he used to be,’ the voice spat venomously. Fear and embarrassment welled up in Sora’s chest. He could feel his heart shrinking under the unbearable pressure.
“Don’t,” he said aloud, “Don’t you ever talk about him like that!” He raised his voice on the last part and this earned him looks from all the people surrounding him, but Sora didn’t care.
Tears were threatening to break through his defenses and a sob escaped his lips. He was struggling against himself and he was losing. He could hear the voice in his head laughing menacingly.
‘Losing this battle will decide your fate forever. Would you rather die and end up like him or do you want to live and show this ‘weakness’ as you call it?’
Sora growled, was that voice threatening him? He pushed his tears back farther with the anger and resentment he felt towards the voice. He was not cold, he was always nice to me. Sora’s mind reflected on all the things that had happened between them, all those special moments. Maybe he did deserve his tears, but not here where everyone else could see him. The tears he would shed were precious…if only he was still alive to see them.
‘Yes,’ the voice whispered, ‘Yes, let it all out…’
Sora took in a deep breath and stood quickly. He felt heavy like lead, but he turned and ran anyway. He ran far away, the voice echoed in his head as he did so. He ran into the forest and deep within it until he reached the center and fell upon the huge stone in the center.
It was there where he finally released his pain. Sobs erupted from his lips and tears spilled from his eyes.
“Every last one of these,” Sora started, suppressing a hiccup, “tears I shed, is dedicated to you. All of the sadness I feel, all of the torment is how much I loved you, and if you ever needed proof Leon, just remember this moment as you look upon me from the heavens…these are the last words I will ever say. I have lost this battle of heart, but I gained my love for you.” As it all came from his mouth, he was surprised he had uttered those words, they had sounded so poetic, and not corny at all he wondered why.
‘You did not lose this battle,’ the voice argued, ‘and I never needed proof, Sora, it was there all along. Now, you remember something for me, your battle has just begun.’
Okay an explanation on the story above, I promise no Spoilers. The reason I wrote this the way I did is because I wanted it to be a kind of in between for Kingdom hearts one and two. It kind of takes place after Kingdom Hearts one, so there are no spoilers for Kingdom hearts two because the death in here is perfectly fiction, so it’s kind of like a breath of fresh air you know? XDD anyway I do hope you enjoy it.
Knight in Shining armor
I can remember running when I thought running away would solve all my problems. I can also remember expecting to hear screaming, but it was so silent. My World was falling apart and there was no screaming. My heart was pounding and my legs were shaking. I needed to find Riku, or at least then I thought I needed to.
I reached him and he turned to me and said something I didn’t quite understand at first. It was always something about the darkness with him and then I wanted to believe him, but there was something about the darkness that had always frightened me.
I can still remember how it felt to have the darkness touch my skin licking at it hungrily. I remember how repulsed I felt as it tried to consume me wholly. Maybe that was why I wasn’t swallowed like Riku, why I received the key blade, because I was scared of the dark. I don’t know how that’s logical, but I guess it made my heart easier to distrust and hate everything that belonged to the darkness. To this day I still often wonder why they chose me, they could’ve had anyone else…why make me their second choice?
I always had so many questions. I can remember waking up in transverse town and the very first time I fought Leon. I had to chuckle at that moment…I couldn’t believe how weak I was back then, and how weak I still am now, but I don’t mind being weak…because it was my weakness after all that showed me who my true love was.
Leon was so cold, but that attracted me to him. I guess you could say he was intriguing or that I was just clingy and Kairi wasn’t around anymore, but even in Hollow Bastion when she hugged me, I felt nothing. I don’t know if it was the fact I had just come back from being consumed by the darkness inside of that heartless or the fact I was head over heels for Leon…but I was almost sure Leon liked Yuffie so I never did bother with him.
Now that I think about it, my entire life has been filled with darkness and loss…it almost seems depressing. I regret so many things in my life and I question many more. This poses the question: If I could go back and change my life choices, would I? No, because even if I lost my friends and was consumed by the darkness I gained them back again. Although, I never did gain the love of my Knight in shining armor.
Saying this now makes my whole ‘romance’ with Leon sound a little corny, but when I was in a bind, I would always picture him coming to save me like a knight would save a princess…like Kairi wanted me to save her. He never did come though, but I didn’t mind. I’m still waiting for him to come and save me from the darkness sometime, but since I sealed off all of the worlds, I doubt it will be anytime soon.
I guess this is what they call a lost cause…
Now this one contains some KH I spoilers, so if you haven’t played the game I warned you. [Talking about theme Dark, Knight thing above this text] Now…onward to my last fic…which I shall reveal tomorrow.