(no subject)
look at me sobbing in my livejournal boo hoo.
fuck. fuckfuck. and the expletives continue...
excuse the horrible spew of sappy shit, but I can now honestly say that I've felt utterly depressed for a period lasting longer than half an hour for the first time in my life.
Ever since Kelsey "broke-up" with me. Fuck I won't kid myself, I don't need quotations. She broke up with me. PERIOD. at least thats how it seems now. uGHHHHH. The first few days later it didn't seem like much was different, but as days go by I fucking miss her more and more. Then with all her exams, studying, work and my work we haven't been able to spend time hanging out. Today was the first time I've seen her in a week. Sure, we still talk on the phone and online everyday pretty much, but its not the same; today when we saw eachother it just felt different and awkward. She'd be right in front of me and it felt like she was a million fucking miles away, to make that sound as trite as possible. I don't know, i just miss things the way they were so much. My life was going along fine and good and skippidy doo dah day until Kelsey came along and made it a thousand times better. And now that I'm back to how the way things were before, "fine and good" is "absolute shit".
Goddamn christfucking hell. would someone please throw be through a meat grinder.
There's more that I could say about how I feel right now and what I think MAY be going on, but I hope it's just me being overparanoid.
i can't stand feeling so angsty/depressed/emo/fuckheaded; it's not me, never has been.
in other news: look at my sockbaby icon. doesn't ronnie look happy?
fuck. fuckfuck. and the expletives continue...
excuse the horrible spew of sappy shit, but I can now honestly say that I've felt utterly depressed for a period lasting longer than half an hour for the first time in my life.
Ever since Kelsey "broke-up" with me. Fuck I won't kid myself, I don't need quotations. She broke up with me. PERIOD. at least thats how it seems now. uGHHHHH. The first few days later it didn't seem like much was different, but as days go by I fucking miss her more and more. Then with all her exams, studying, work and my work we haven't been able to spend time hanging out. Today was the first time I've seen her in a week. Sure, we still talk on the phone and online everyday pretty much, but its not the same; today when we saw eachother it just felt different and awkward. She'd be right in front of me and it felt like she was a million fucking miles away, to make that sound as trite as possible. I don't know, i just miss things the way they were so much. My life was going along fine and good and skippidy doo dah day until Kelsey came along and made it a thousand times better. And now that I'm back to how the way things were before, "fine and good" is "absolute shit".
Goddamn christfucking hell. would someone please throw be through a meat grinder.
There's more that I could say about how I feel right now and what I think MAY be going on, but I hope it's just me being overparanoid.
i can't stand feeling so angsty/depressed/emo/fuckheaded; it's not me, never has been.
in other news: look at my sockbaby icon. doesn't ronnie look happy?