heartbreaking news
I came across this blog.
About a 26yearold expressing herself, over the issue about her unwanted pregnancy.
"However, I am now having second thoughts after yesterday's session. Do I want a child whose father is so selfish, irresponsible and heartless? Whose paternal grandparents (and I had thought that being in their 50s, and the parents of two grown-up sons in the late 20s, they would have better sense than their son) are equally cruel? What happens if the child is a splitting image of LX? What happens if the child has birth deformities or is intellectually disabled? What happens if the child turns out to be a juvenile delinquent, a criminal? I am only 26. I have so much going on for me. I am not ready for motherhood. I can barely take care of myself, with my history of depression, mood swings and emotional uncertainties, let alone another human being. It will be so much harder for me to find the love of my life with a child. While LX is getting away scot free and is moving on with his life, my life will completely change and there will be no turning back once the child is born. And I don't even like kids.
It's not fair that the mother has to carry the emotional, social and much of the financial burden of bringing up the child, while the father and his family try to bury this episode, keep it from family and friends and move on with their lives, as though this episode had never happened. I am sure that in 5, maximum 10 years, LX would marry a woman he loves and bring up wanted and happy children, providing them with all the love he can give and fulfill as much of their material wants as possible, while his first child has to bear the social stigma of coming from a single parent family, and unable to enjoy much material wants, because his/her mom can barely feed herself, him/her and her elderly parents.
But, what happens if I never meet the love of my life? What happens if I am so emotionally scarred by this episode that I cannot open my heart again to the possibility of a new love? Even if I do, can he accept that I had an abortion before? I already have an infertility problem, and it is a medically known fact that abortions reduce the chances of getting pregnant in the future. What happens if this is the only child that I am meant to have in this life time and I can't have anymore? Can I live with the guilt of killing my child? Will I look at other children and wonder whether my child would be just like them if he/she had been alive?"
And this is exactly I don't support pre-marital sex. :/ (yesyes, I'm not unlike some prissy nun.)
About a 26yearold expressing herself, over the issue about her unwanted pregnancy.
"However, I am now having second thoughts after yesterday's session. Do I want a child whose father is so selfish, irresponsible and heartless? Whose paternal grandparents (and I had thought that being in their 50s, and the parents of two grown-up sons in the late 20s, they would have better sense than their son) are equally cruel? What happens if the child is a splitting image of LX? What happens if the child has birth deformities or is intellectually disabled? What happens if the child turns out to be a juvenile delinquent, a criminal? I am only 26. I have so much going on for me. I am not ready for motherhood. I can barely take care of myself, with my history of depression, mood swings and emotional uncertainties, let alone another human being. It will be so much harder for me to find the love of my life with a child. While LX is getting away scot free and is moving on with his life, my life will completely change and there will be no turning back once the child is born. And I don't even like kids.
It's not fair that the mother has to carry the emotional, social and much of the financial burden of bringing up the child, while the father and his family try to bury this episode, keep it from family and friends and move on with their lives, as though this episode had never happened. I am sure that in 5, maximum 10 years, LX would marry a woman he loves and bring up wanted and happy children, providing them with all the love he can give and fulfill as much of their material wants as possible, while his first child has to bear the social stigma of coming from a single parent family, and unable to enjoy much material wants, because his/her mom can barely feed herself, him/her and her elderly parents.
But, what happens if I never meet the love of my life? What happens if I am so emotionally scarred by this episode that I cannot open my heart again to the possibility of a new love? Even if I do, can he accept that I had an abortion before? I already have an infertility problem, and it is a medically known fact that abortions reduce the chances of getting pregnant in the future. What happens if this is the only child that I am meant to have in this life time and I can't have anymore? Can I live with the guilt of killing my child? Will I look at other children and wonder whether my child would be just like them if he/she had been alive?"
And this is exactly I don't support pre-marital sex. :/ (yesyes, I'm not unlike some prissy nun.)