Gift!Fic for Lizzie: Getting There is Half the Fun (or, How Ed and Roy Both Fail At Driving)
Title - Getting There Is Half the Fun (or, How Ed and Roy Both Fail At Driving)
Pairing/Characters - EdxRoy
Genre - Romance / Shameless Fluff (plot? What plot?)
Rating - PG
Prompt - Lost
I know, I know, there are no holidays in FMA. I’mma point to this fic for a possible explanation for why they have it in this fic, though. >_>
I hope you like it, lizzie8d ! :)
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If he had to get lost, why the hell did it have to be with this guy?!
Edward Elric was positively fuming. And with his present company, the alchemist felt that he was well within his rights to be angry.
“Oh, quite sulking, Ed, and tell me which way to go.” Roy Mustang ordered distractedly.
“Where the sun doesn’t shine?” Ed suggested promptly. Roy sent him an annoyed look.
Oh, it had seemed like a great idea. He and Roy had taken a short winter vacation to a resort in the South East, a present/order from (now Colonel) Hawkeye and her men to the Furhur and his alchemist. The tickets had at first been declined (there were holiday preparations and Parliament was up to its usual idiocy and there was just too much work), but an ominous look from Hawkeye had been more than enough incentive to go.
The resort itself had been fun, admittedly. There were hot springs and comfy bedrooms for when they’d wanted to relax, and all the materials for a popular new sport “skiing,” as well as traditional sleds and ice skating, when the couple had wanted to get out and do something. It had been a pretty much perfect week away with his lover, really.
The problem now was getting home.
Going to the resort was easy enough- they’d taken a train. Except that the trains had unexpectedly been delayed past the deadline for them to get back to Risembool on time, and now Ed and Roy were having trouble with the getting back part of it.
Being in his hometown for the holidays had been Ed’s only condition for going on the little vacation. Aside from the fact that Winry and Al would kill him if he wasn’t there to spend Christmas with his little niece as promised, having all the people closest to him in one place sounded very appealing indeed. There was no way he was going to miss out.
… Unless that bastard didn’t pick up his speed and stop driving like a sissy.*
“Would you just pull over and let me drive?!”
Like the other sixty-four times he’d asked this question, Roy replied, “No.” Unlike the last sixty-four times, however, he actually elaborated. “Your brother warned me about what a reckless driver you are--”
“At least I actually get where I want to go!”
“--and the last time I let you drive us home in Central you crashed into a lamp post.”
“I was just swerving to avoid some jerk who came outta nowhere and you know it.” Ed huffed, slumping down in his seat and pulling his coat around him. Stupid car and its lack of heating. “Besides, you have next to no driving experience, right? Turn left and watch out for the ice.”
“I see it. And I’ve driven enough to be trusted to handle a car and not slam it into the nearest object, thanks--”
As Roy spoke, his fingers, which were numb with cold from the distinct lack of heating system aside from their shared body warmth, slipped across the steering wheel and lost hold of it. Of course, this also happened to be when they were crossing the huge patch of ice. Ed heard Roy’s words cut off, and then the blond alchemist was thrown into the door of the car and Roy was suddenly practically on top of him and they were spinning spinning spinning
a suspiciously muffled thump
and it stopped.
Ed couldn’t tell how much time passed before he could speak.
“... Roy?”
A long pause. He was there, he was a heavy and real weight on Ed’s chest, but that had nothing to do with whether he was conscious or okay or anything and oh no oh no please answer you stupid lovable bastard don’t you dare let this faze you
“... Edward? Are you-- okay, stop panicking, that’s a good first step.” The other man sounded dazed, but with some effort he rolled off of Ed, only to turn and pull the blond into a tight hug. Ed absently realized that he was close to hypervenilating which was probably a really bad idea in the middle of who knew where and they didn’t have the materials to transmute a paper bag or anything. “Hey, Ed, we’re okay. I think. Calm down.” Logically, since Roy was whispering that in his ears and his breath was warming Ed’s chilled ears and kind of making him blush that meant that Roy was okay, he was alive and Ed should really stop panicking any time now.
It took several minutes of hugs and repeated reassurances from Roy, but the blond alchemist eventually calmed down. When they were both just laying there, breathing evenly, Ed mustered up the strength to thump a hand lightly against Roy’s chest.
“You can let go now. You’re okay, right?”
“Yep.” Ed let him get away with a quick kiss before they disentangled themselves and climbed out of the vehicle. Roy stood next to him and stared at the car. They’d apparently landed in a large snowbank, which accounted for the muffled sound earlier but didn’t really cushion the car at all.
“... there’s no way we’re making it to Risembool in that.” He said blankly. “Unless you’re confident enough that you can transmute it back to normal without accidentally blowing us up?”
“If Winry were here it’d be a different story, but probably not now, no.” Ed snorted, the action visible in the winter air. “What was that you were saying about your driving skills?”
“Shut up.”
“And now we’re going to be completely late to Risembool, and Al and Winry are going to kill me, and you have no idea where we are, do you?”
“You’re really not helping, Ed.” Roy grumbled.
“We are pretty lucky in one respect, though,” Ed observed, looking around. “A little further and we would have ended up in that river, and there’s not nearly enough ice to hold the car, which would have been a whole new world of problems.”
“How cheerful. Now, do you have any idea of where the nearest house is? Maybe they’ll have a phone or--”
Ed wasn’t paying attention to him, instead studying their surroundings closely. Wait a sec... Okay, factor in basic geography and how close we probably were...
“Ed?” Mustang wrapped his arms around the other man, probably equally to share body heat as well as get his attention.
“Oh, actually, I think I know where we are.” He stared at the river for a moment longer, then nodded. “Yeah, this is only about ten miles south of Risembool. We follow it that way,” he pointed northward, “and we’ll run practically through Al and Winry’s back yard. Maybe even in time for Christmas, if we start now.”
“Ten miles? In this snow?” Roy looked around pointedly. The snow was currently about two feet deep, and still coming down in thick clumps. After a moment of careful consideration, he nodded. “Well, I suppose it’d be far too much trouble if I just let Mrs. Elric kill you for breaking a promise to your niece, and she’ll doubtless have all kinds of pie ready anyway...”
Ed grinned to himself as they set off, Roy still partially wrapped around him.
Eh, if he had to get lost, at least it was with this guy.
*Not, as the modern saying goes, “like a little old lady,” because the little old ladies Edward Elric knew were woman to be feared.
Pairing/Characters - EdxRoy
Genre - Romance / Shameless Fluff (plot? What plot?)
Rating - PG
Prompt - Lost
I know, I know, there are no holidays in FMA. I’mma point to this fic for a possible explanation for why they have it in this fic, though. >_>
I hope you like it, lizzie8d ! :)
-------------
If he had to get lost, why the hell did it have to be with this guy?!
Edward Elric was positively fuming. And with his present company, the alchemist felt that he was well within his rights to be angry.
“Oh, quite sulking, Ed, and tell me which way to go.” Roy Mustang ordered distractedly.
“Where the sun doesn’t shine?” Ed suggested promptly. Roy sent him an annoyed look.
Oh, it had seemed like a great idea. He and Roy had taken a short winter vacation to a resort in the South East, a present/order from (now Colonel) Hawkeye and her men to the Furhur and his alchemist. The tickets had at first been declined (there were holiday preparations and Parliament was up to its usual idiocy and there was just too much work), but an ominous look from Hawkeye had been more than enough incentive to go.
The resort itself had been fun, admittedly. There were hot springs and comfy bedrooms for when they’d wanted to relax, and all the materials for a popular new sport “skiing,” as well as traditional sleds and ice skating, when the couple had wanted to get out and do something. It had been a pretty much perfect week away with his lover, really.
The problem now was getting home.
Going to the resort was easy enough- they’d taken a train. Except that the trains had unexpectedly been delayed past the deadline for them to get back to Risembool on time, and now Ed and Roy were having trouble with the getting back part of it.
Being in his hometown for the holidays had been Ed’s only condition for going on the little vacation. Aside from the fact that Winry and Al would kill him if he wasn’t there to spend Christmas with his little niece as promised, having all the people closest to him in one place sounded very appealing indeed. There was no way he was going to miss out.
… Unless that bastard didn’t pick up his speed and stop driving like a sissy.*
“Would you just pull over and let me drive?!”
Like the other sixty-four times he’d asked this question, Roy replied, “No.” Unlike the last sixty-four times, however, he actually elaborated. “Your brother warned me about what a reckless driver you are--”
“At least I actually get where I want to go!”
“--and the last time I let you drive us home in Central you crashed into a lamp post.”
“I was just swerving to avoid some jerk who came outta nowhere and you know it.” Ed huffed, slumping down in his seat and pulling his coat around him. Stupid car and its lack of heating. “Besides, you have next to no driving experience, right? Turn left and watch out for the ice.”
“I see it. And I’ve driven enough to be trusted to handle a car and not slam it into the nearest object, thanks--”
As Roy spoke, his fingers, which were numb with cold from the distinct lack of heating system aside from their shared body warmth, slipped across the steering wheel and lost hold of it. Of course, this also happened to be when they were crossing the huge patch of ice. Ed heard Roy’s words cut off, and then the blond alchemist was thrown into the door of the car and Roy was suddenly practically on top of him and they were spinning spinning spinning
a suspiciously muffled thump
and it stopped.
Ed couldn’t tell how much time passed before he could speak.
“... Roy?”
A long pause. He was there, he was a heavy and real weight on Ed’s chest, but that had nothing to do with whether he was conscious or okay or anything and oh no oh no please answer you stupid lovable bastard don’t you dare let this faze you
“... Edward? Are you-- okay, stop panicking, that’s a good first step.” The other man sounded dazed, but with some effort he rolled off of Ed, only to turn and pull the blond into a tight hug. Ed absently realized that he was close to hypervenilating which was probably a really bad idea in the middle of who knew where and they didn’t have the materials to transmute a paper bag or anything. “Hey, Ed, we’re okay. I think. Calm down.” Logically, since Roy was whispering that in his ears and his breath was warming Ed’s chilled ears and kind of making him blush that meant that Roy was okay, he was alive and Ed should really stop panicking any time now.
It took several minutes of hugs and repeated reassurances from Roy, but the blond alchemist eventually calmed down. When they were both just laying there, breathing evenly, Ed mustered up the strength to thump a hand lightly against Roy’s chest.
“You can let go now. You’re okay, right?”
“Yep.” Ed let him get away with a quick kiss before they disentangled themselves and climbed out of the vehicle. Roy stood next to him and stared at the car. They’d apparently landed in a large snowbank, which accounted for the muffled sound earlier but didn’t really cushion the car at all.
“... there’s no way we’re making it to Risembool in that.” He said blankly. “Unless you’re confident enough that you can transmute it back to normal without accidentally blowing us up?”
“If Winry were here it’d be a different story, but probably not now, no.” Ed snorted, the action visible in the winter air. “What was that you were saying about your driving skills?”
“Shut up.”
“And now we’re going to be completely late to Risembool, and Al and Winry are going to kill me, and you have no idea where we are, do you?”
“You’re really not helping, Ed.” Roy grumbled.
“We are pretty lucky in one respect, though,” Ed observed, looking around. “A little further and we would have ended up in that river, and there’s not nearly enough ice to hold the car, which would have been a whole new world of problems.”
“How cheerful. Now, do you have any idea of where the nearest house is? Maybe they’ll have a phone or--”
Ed wasn’t paying attention to him, instead studying their surroundings closely. Wait a sec... Okay, factor in basic geography and how close we probably were...
“Ed?” Mustang wrapped his arms around the other man, probably equally to share body heat as well as get his attention.
“Oh, actually, I think I know where we are.” He stared at the river for a moment longer, then nodded. “Yeah, this is only about ten miles south of Risembool. We follow it that way,” he pointed northward, “and we’ll run practically through Al and Winry’s back yard. Maybe even in time for Christmas, if we start now.”
“Ten miles? In this snow?” Roy looked around pointedly. The snow was currently about two feet deep, and still coming down in thick clumps. After a moment of careful consideration, he nodded. “Well, I suppose it’d be far too much trouble if I just let Mrs. Elric kill you for breaking a promise to your niece, and she’ll doubtless have all kinds of pie ready anyway...”
Ed grinned to himself as they set off, Roy still partially wrapped around him.
Eh, if he had to get lost, at least it was with this guy.
*Not, as the modern saying goes, “like a little old lady,” because the little old ladies Edward Elric knew were woman to be feared.