last night pastor Paul decided to feed the splotchy cat that's been running around the property all week. i immediately began to insist (quite vehemently) that feeding the cat would result in our mission being overrun by strays…but when i saw how excited the kids were & how really happy it made Caroline & Paul to give the animal some dinner, i ( Read more... )

i'm afraid to go to bed even though i'm so sick & so tired because the evil spirits that are attacking me don't really get to work until i try to sleep. they wake me up hours before the valley turns to face the sun's first rays; they prowl around my room & i can't see them but i know that they are there. i try to imagine what they might look like: ( Read more... )

sometimes God just has to force us to relax ( Read more... )

yeah, so today i didn't even get outta bed until 10am (rock on) & then Jonathan was playing pool over here & we were both a bit bored & i was a bit ill, so we went to the Getty…so so cold we stayed inside & saw basically everthing ( Read more... )

QOTD: Creatures are not born with desires unless satisfaction for those desires exists. A baby feels hunger: well, there is such a thing as food. A duckling wants to swim: well, there is such a thing as water. Men feel sexual desire: well, there is such a thing as sex. If I find in myself a desire which no experience in this world can satisfy, the ( Read more... )

i'm sick of how when we're shooting free throws i'm the only one they encourage. crap like: ‹‹you can do it›› or ‹‹that was a good effort, today››. what the crud is that supposed to mean? i dunno. or that they will all start explaining something to me whenever Jonathan explains anything. as if i don't get the concept. ignoring the fact that i'm one ( Read more... )

by the time my alarm went off @ 5:45 this morning, i had already made a firm decision not to get out of bed today. when caroline came to tell me that it was six, i would tell her that i wasn't feeling well. hey, i wasn't feeling well, & wouldn't go to basketball practice, either ( Read more... )

okay, long story, but i'm on xanga now, too ( Read more... )

it hurts to run, to jump, to bend my knees.

to walk.

to stand.

i'm more frustrated than i know how to deal with right now...& i hate being angry. always feel like my skull has been stuffed with cotton, & pauline is playing this soppy soppy piece of crap called you left me just when i needed you the most by bread. not only is that title ( Read more... )

ookay ( Read more... )