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Jul 23, 2006 21:07

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chat_noir July 27 2006, 00:22:21 UTC
I woulda been pissed at myself for not being able to trust my own instincts. I woulda heard a little "I told you so" in my head, after being disillusioned to her game, and then I woulda resented my own desire to help her. "Sucker..." And then I woulda been confused about when CAN I trust that instinct to help others? And then I woulda resented HER for ruining it for people in genuine need of help. That's a handful of emotions to come from just one incident.
Bless your heart. Does any of that hit home? Don't beat yourself up for being torn, and don't "beat her up" for being a swindler. Obviously those are the best coping skills she has, which is its own sad story. I sorry that got to ya so much--it would have me too.

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a_winter_dawn July 27 2006, 05:42:40 UTC
Definately about the whole conflict about trusting my instincts to help others versus feeling stupid for being swindled.

When it comes down to it, though, no harm came of offering her help. Only it DOES hit home, because I related to her--I think I saw too much of myself in her--and I was REALLY frustrated that I was unable to help her.

Thanks so much for understanding :)

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