Comments | abbie_chan: Done.

abbie_chan

Done.

Aug 20, 2010 21:56

I give up. No really I do. I'm sick of arguing, sick of crying, sick of feeling sick and pathetic and depressed. I wash my hands of this whole situation. I'll let my mother do whatever she wants, because she's going to do it anyway. If I end up homeless, with no where to go, and no one to turn to, then just so be it ( Read more... )

Comments 4

kokoro August 21 2010, 05:32:39 UTC

This sounds like my latest entry. Sometimes it seems like the entire world just wants you to fail...

Don't you just want to hop into a car and drive nonstop for weeks and weeks, away from everything, and just see where you end up? I've always fantasized about doing that.

Hope things get better for you soon.

abbie_chan August 21 2010, 05:51:19 UTC

If I had a car I probably would by now. I hate this place, and more and more I truly start to hate my mother. But I have no family I can turn to right now. No one can take me in, so I'm stuck on my own. And with no foreseeable source of income on the horizon I'm pretty screwed.

It almost makes me want to turn to -desperate things- for money. But the actual thought of that scares me so much.

wonderspacedog August 21 2010, 07:56:42 UTC

I'm not sure how inspiring this story is or not, but my boy friend was in a really similar situation with his mother just last year (and since his early teens) she is seriously abusive and a miserable person and his anxiety levels were so high because of her. He felt trapped in the house and was trying to work to be able to get out.
One week he went to Portland with a friend of his for a short road trip, and long story short he lives there now. I mean, he lives in a REALLY small one room apartment that is 300/month but he is so much happier. I can tell. He just had to get away.
I hope that you can find your way out soon, like my boyfriend did, because I think you really deserve to live a happy life free from unnecessary anxiety caused by others.

melonhoney August 21 2010, 09:21:05 UTC

I've been in your situation so many times before. You know this. Where I feel like being on the street would even be better than home. I've looked into some options for myself locally and continue to keep my ear to the ground to see what opportunities come up just in case I find myself in a really bad situation again soon ( ... )