And I would totally offer to britpick for you (anytime!) but this... doesn't need it. :p The only thing I noticed was we say "top up" (a drink) not "off".
Regardless, I adored your charcterisations, and the dialogue, and it was just so much fun to read! Will look forward to the rest, whenever you get it done. :)
ty love <3 i appreciate the correction and made it already XDDDD i will try to get the next part up asap, but circumstances are rather miserable right now. =/
LOOK I TOLD YOU IT WAS CLICHE OK I NEVER PRETENDED OTHERWISE. it's really only going to get WORSE from here, with lots of awkward moping and pining and shit. srsly, if you don't like schmoop, GET OUT NOW.
1. I adore your dialogue. ALL OF IT, EVERY LINE, I WANT TO DUNK IT IN MY COFFEE AND EAT IT UP. It's always been my favorite part of your writing, because it comes so naturally but so funny and witty at the same time, like these lines:
"It's because he's the title character, isn't it."
"You know, if we titled the show 'Arthur', I highly doubt anyone would be cooing over you."
"You--you really are very, very badly named. You're not angelic at all, are you."
SO EPIC. So good. I also love how you convey so clearly Colin's sort of reserved, quiet nice boy-ness, and then he gets riotously drunk and it's like almost sex in and of itself because he loosens up and starts having emotions and okay, I love the exchange about Colin eating pizza, and then the strawberries, and then when Colin is all ALL THE VIDEOTAPES ARE OF ME I died, I really really died
( ... )
NO OMG AKI THIS IS THE BEST IDEA EVER, PLEASE DON'T MAKE THIS OUT TO BE A BAD THING, that is exactly what Bradley is turning out to be and it's so great. It is a really traditional romcom but you do write it so well, and dude, why else do we read fiction and watch movies if it isn't so we can indulge in witty talk and cleverisms and clumsy people being sharp? Otherwise I'd just go people watching. SO PLZ TO CONTINUE making up conversations in your head and writing them in your stories
( ... )
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And I would totally offer to britpick for you (anytime!) but this... doesn't need it. :p The only thing I noticed was we say "top up" (a drink) not "off".
Regardless, I adored your charcterisations, and the dialogue, and it was just so much fun to read! Will look forward to the rest, whenever you get it done. :)
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WAIT I WILL GET BACK TO YOU ON THIS AHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAH
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(am i succeeding in making you like bradley yet.)
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(a;sldfkj i've always liked bradley, I JUST LIKE COLIN BETTER and so doe he so whatever, we're even)
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1. I adore your dialogue. ALL OF IT, EVERY LINE, I WANT TO DUNK IT IN MY COFFEE AND EAT IT UP. It's always been my favorite part of your writing, because it comes so naturally but so funny and witty at the same time, like these lines:
"It's because he's the title character, isn't it."
"You know, if we titled the show 'Arthur', I highly doubt anyone would be cooing over you."
"You--you really are very, very badly named. You're not angelic at all, are you."
SO EPIC. So good. I also love how you convey so clearly Colin's sort of reserved, quiet nice boy-ness, and then he gets riotously drunk and it's like almost sex in and of itself because he loosens up and starts having emotions and okay, I love the exchange about Colin eating pizza, and then the strawberries, and then when Colin is all ALL THE VIDEOTAPES ARE OF ME I died, I really really died ( ... )
Reply
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NO OMG AKI THIS IS THE BEST IDEA EVER, PLEASE DON'T MAKE THIS OUT TO BE A BAD THING, that is exactly what Bradley is turning out to be and it's so great. It is a really traditional romcom but you do write it so well, and dude, why else do we read fiction and watch movies if it isn't so we can indulge in witty talk and cleverisms and clumsy people being sharp? Otherwise I'd just go people watching. SO PLZ TO CONTINUE making up conversations in your head and writing them in your stories ( ... )
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/love
/e wishes Kara a lovely time in Northrend!
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