so sick and tired
This is gonna be a rant entry, only because I haven't ranted in forever, and i'm angry and blah. I'll LJ cut for people's
I'm so sick and tired of how nothing is going right, how I want something and I don't get it and I hate how things work out.
I've been trying to lose weight for over a year now. I tried pilates, I've done nutrisystem, I've watched what I eat. I changed from eating fast food and fried foods to healthy food. I have a light breakfast every morning, even against the will of my stomach. I eat a salad for lunch every freaking day, and I have a healthy dinner, granted, it's always a late dinner, but it is a healthy dinner, and i stay up late to compensate. I have a snack that is usually fruit, yogurt, or some sort of protien. WTF am I doing wrong!? I haven't lost anything for over 3 months.
I'm so sick of buying crap jeans from walmart. 1 because I'm poor and can't afford decent clothes, 2 because walmart is the only place I know that has my size for a decent price. I always think, well , I'll buy these clothes only once, since i wanna lose weight. it isn't worth spending so much on a pair of jeans that i won't fit into soon. I've bought the same size for awhile now. I want to lose the weight damnit.
I hate it how I can't get work done. I say that I will, and then as soon as I start it doens't happen. I should have an internship this summer. I should have a fully developed portfolio site, I shouldn't have to retake classes.
I fucking hate this damn cough/cold. I wanna get better already.
So I'm sick, I'm tired, I'm fat, I'm not getting work done, I don't have money. this blows.
there... that's didn't help, but whatever.
There was a dinner tonight for choir. I didn't sing at all this year because I can't sing and i've been sick a lot. couldn't go to practices. I was invited to go but I couldn't. I wanted to but money problems. this morning my account said that it was under by $1.34 and I was like, okay, that sucks, i'll go get my paychecks and put it in and all will be well. wrong. apparently, my bank wsasn't truthful and didn't refresh, so I was really under $177 or something, so i'm currently under $4 and then i'll be charged a penalty and blah, this blows. I hate when my online thing doesn't work right. only me to blame though, I really should be using a check book thingie. or something. but i don't. because i apparently don't have enough time.
why can't I lose weight? ugh.
So I should be working, and I'm not.
I'm so sick and tired of how nothing is going right, how I want something and I don't get it and I hate how things work out.
I've been trying to lose weight for over a year now. I tried pilates, I've done nutrisystem, I've watched what I eat. I changed from eating fast food and fried foods to healthy food. I have a light breakfast every morning, even against the will of my stomach. I eat a salad for lunch every freaking day, and I have a healthy dinner, granted, it's always a late dinner, but it is a healthy dinner, and i stay up late to compensate. I have a snack that is usually fruit, yogurt, or some sort of protien. WTF am I doing wrong!? I haven't lost anything for over 3 months.
I'm so sick of buying crap jeans from walmart. 1 because I'm poor and can't afford decent clothes, 2 because walmart is the only place I know that has my size for a decent price. I always think, well , I'll buy these clothes only once, since i wanna lose weight. it isn't worth spending so much on a pair of jeans that i won't fit into soon. I've bought the same size for awhile now. I want to lose the weight damnit.
I hate it how I can't get work done. I say that I will, and then as soon as I start it doens't happen. I should have an internship this summer. I should have a fully developed portfolio site, I shouldn't have to retake classes.
I fucking hate this damn cough/cold. I wanna get better already.
So I'm sick, I'm tired, I'm fat, I'm not getting work done, I don't have money. this blows.
there... that's didn't help, but whatever.
There was a dinner tonight for choir. I didn't sing at all this year because I can't sing and i've been sick a lot. couldn't go to practices. I was invited to go but I couldn't. I wanted to but money problems. this morning my account said that it was under by $1.34 and I was like, okay, that sucks, i'll go get my paychecks and put it in and all will be well. wrong. apparently, my bank wsasn't truthful and didn't refresh, so I was really under $177 or something, so i'm currently under $4 and then i'll be charged a penalty and blah, this blows. I hate when my online thing doesn't work right. only me to blame though, I really should be using a check book thingie. or something. but i don't. because i apparently don't have enough time.
why can't I lose weight? ugh.
So I should be working, and I'm not.