(Untitled)

[adhd_phd]

A thunderous THUNK and the screeching of metal against metal echoes through the Red Dwarf. Shortly thereafter, an equally jarring audio transmission crackles from the speakers. The voice speaks very quickly, rarely pausing to take a breath.

Hmmm . . . Very large. Very utilitarian. Deep space. Human text. Red Dwarf. Perhaps abandoned? Expect no one

Comments

[ajrimmer_ssc]

[ERM. Hello, red alert. The bulb was already changed even!]

Ah, this is acting captain Arnold J. Rimmer, please identify yourself and your craft? Please? And don't shoot?

[adhd_phd]

Mordin Solus, piloting emergency vessel. Escape pod originating on the MSV Rotterdam. Left Omega thirty-four hours ago, bound for the Citadel. Critical ship malfunction in mass relay. Cause for emergency evacuation.

No intention to shoot. Ask questions first. May change mind later.

Acting captain? Original captain is dead? What about rest of crew? Ship in distress? Far from known star systems. Perhaps drifting for a long time. Possible unrest in ranks. Dwindling resources. [Sniff] Cannibalism? Proceed with caution.

[ajrimmer_ssc]

Cannibalism? What? No! There's no cannibalism here, what are you even talking about?

Look, erm. Mordin. Can you head for docking bay 7? Port side, just aft of the hydrogen scoop. I think that's the closest one to where you hit us. I think.

[adhd_phd]

Merely thinking aloud. Habit.

[There is a pause as Mordin is presumably navigating the escape pod to the suggested location. ] Curious ship. Merchant-class vessel? What is planet of origin? Cargo?

[vivi_sorrow]

"What's all the noise?"

A child's face appears on the view screen, wearing a straw pointy hat with the point flopping down half-way up.

"Oh, a new person! Hi! Don't mind Mr. Rimmer - he gets a bit jumpy sometimes. I'm Vivi."

[adhd_phd]

Acting captain seems to require psychological assessment. Already suspect anxiety paired with delusions. Not fit for position of command.

[sniff] Child on mining vessel? Humans do not typically subject their children to space travel. Ship becoming increasingly curious.

[vivi_sorrow]

He does get a bit... anxious, I guess. I try not to think about it. The library's good for that, even though it's weird too.

[He pauses for a moment]

Oh, I'm not actually human - I just look kind of like one. Humans don't have single colour eyes like Black Mages.