(no subject)
Who: Lucy Weasley and Brandon Selwyn
What: Trying to understand each other
Where: Dungeon and then the Room of Requirements
When: Backdated to Saturday Evening after she talks with James
Status:Complete
Lucy was upset after talking to James, she didn't want to head back to the Hufflepuff common room yet, she just wanted to run away. She was getting more confused about how she felt, crushing on Chris and wanting to know if she was crushing on Madi or if it was a phase. Adding Brandon on top of it all and then finding to ask Adin about that terrible day for him about what happened, there was so much going on in her head, she knew it was only time her father came to see her about the Mavens or even the fight with Molly. She never fought with her sister, but she was so lost lately, now losing Hugo to some monster, she didn't realize where she was until she wiped away some tears and seeing that she was down in the dungeons.
Brandon was whistling a tune to himself as he rounded a corner. It had been a good day so far and he had high hopes for the rest of it. The song he was writing was almost finished and he was more than a little proud of it. He had sent a draft to his sister and she had loved it too. He almost didn’t see Lucy at first but a wide grin caught him when she did fall into his gaze. Like flicking a switch he went into sensitive pussy mode. "Lucy, I'm so glad to see you!"
Lucy looked up and seen Brandon a head of her, something inside was thrilled to see Brandon, though she was still so unsure why. She walked up to him and pushed away the rest of her tears, "Is everything okay?" She asked trying so hard to get herself together which was sadly failing at this moment. She took a deep breath and then released it.
Brandon's smile slipped with dramatic flair. "Never mind what is going on with me what is wrong with you? You have been crying? What happened to you? Did someone hurt you?"
Brandon's face was a mask of feigned anger. "Is there anything I can do?"
Pushing away her tears, "No, I'm fine. It's just I'm upset about m little cousin Hugo. I'm fine really. No one has hurt me." She smiled and looked up into his eyes. "Well, between fighting without my sister and worried about if my father heard about the latest Mavens. I'm fine. I want to know if you're okay." She tried to smile for him.
"Yeah I heard about the rumors, I was horrified to hear it. Is there anything I can do at all?" Brandon had read the last Maven's post too. He fancied his chances with Lucy after reading it. With a kind look he opened out his arms in a friendly way. " I have a hug right here if it helps, it's free for this one time only special offer." Merlin, he felt sick talking like that.
Without thinking, she wrapped her arms around him, "I wish it was me that was taken. Hugo is so small and helpless." She rest her head on his chest, she couldn't help herself open to him no matter what other thoughts in her head were telling her. "I just want everything to be simple again. I hate feeling like I'm losing myself." She closed her eyes.
"Things are never simple, the only thing that you can do is find someone to help you shoulder the burden, and on that count I should point out that I have wide shoulders should you need them. I'm sure your brother will be fine, the ministry will handle it well. If you feel like you are losing it all just hold on to me to keep yourself in place"
He squeezed her tight and kissed her on her forehead.
She felt a little better since running into Brandon, "Thank you, though Hugo is just my little cousin, but I feel like he is my brother." She smiled and looked up at him after he kissed her forehead. "Now, tell me what is wrong." She smiled sweetly.
How the hell were you supposed to tell with these Weasleys, there was way to many of them. "Well compared to your problems they don't amount to nothing. It's my dad, he wrote me a letter to say that he has arranged for me to go meet the daughter of some friend of his. In short that means he is thinking about arranging a marriage, he did it for my eldest sister too. He is very archaic in his beliefs."
Brandon squeezed her a little closer, " I know how his mind works, he says its just a date but he will pressure me all the time. I hate feeling I’m having my life lived for me."
Lucy couldn't imagine her father doing anything like that to her, she felt so bad for him, pushing her feeling aside she wrapped her arms around him tighter, "That's not fair that your father would do that to his own children. I mean you should be able to love and marry who ever you want. Not be pushed into it." She glanced up looking into his eyes, how could she hate him, even though part of her because of Adin told her to. She bit her lip and sighed, "I wish there was something I could do for you."
Brandon thought he was doing well with this sensitive shit. He needed to use it now and then but it made him feel like a damn pussy. "He is all about the purity of blood and that non-sense. I will fight him on this but it is going to be tough." Smiling at her he brushed away a few strands of her hair, in the moments silence he leaned in to kiss her.. with a grimace he stopped short.
" I'm sorry, I had no right to assume, it’s just you are so beautiful I got caught up."
Feeling his lips on hers, she couldn't remember why she was upset, god was this even more confusing. "No, it's fine. I thought is was very sweet." She smiled and pulled away for a moment looking into his eyes, "Brandon, can I ask you something? Well, more talk to you about something." She bit her bottom lip looking up at him.
"Yeah sure go ahead", she hadn't gotten angry at him. This was actually going to be easy. Smoothing his features he took her hands in his. " Ask your questions"
"I talked to Adin, I didn't like what he told me. He told me about that night that you and Marcus beat him up before, but I told him I wanted to know anything he didn't tell me." She paused trying to get her thoughts together. "He told you that you did most of the beating, now I need to know your side of this. Adi is my best friend and I don't see why he would lie to me."
Fuck you Adin you homosexual piece of shit, keep your mouth shut or I will shut it for good. That was what he was thinking, he said something different. " Okay that is fair, but can we not talk about this here? Can we go to the room of requirement? We can actually sit in privacy and talk properly."
Lucy nodded her and walked with Brandon, "I am so sorry. I don't want you mad at me." She said as she walked with him and then finding the spot that the room was at. "Before I go in with you, you aren't going to do anything to hurt me, right?" She asked looking at Brandon.
Brandon took a few steps away from her. " I can't believe you would ask me that. Seriously I am not a fucking monster." Cursing loudly he kicked over a nearby chair. " Do you think I would hit any girl? Do you think I would do anything to you? The fact that you would ask me that makes me think you see me the same way everyone else does."
Turning his face away from here he brought his hands up to cover his eyes. Inside he was snickering but he looked like he was crying. Let her stew in some guilt for a while.
Lucy stepped back and looked at him, she took a deep breath trying to figure out something to say, she closed her eyes and looked at Brandon. Walking towards him and took his hands, "I don't think that of you. I am just confused because of what Adin told me about you." She looked into his eyes. "I am so sorry Brandon, I don't know what to believe. You are so sweet to me and then again look at the way to treat Adin." She bit her lip, I want to trust you so badly, let's go inside." She opened the door to the room of requirements pulling him with all her might to sit down with her. She turned to look at him and she had a nervous face, "Please tell me everything that happened."
Brandon pretended to put up a struggle as he allowed himself to be lead into the room. Once he was sitting he wiped an invisible tear from his eye. " There is nothing I could say to make the horrible things I did to Adin ok. There were a lot of factors but my own horrible anger is the worst thing."
A short searching through his pockets produced a box of cigarettes, he lit one and drew deep on it.
" You need to know that I have had an angry upbringing, my dad beats the living shit out of me every time I step out of line. My mum drinks all fucking day too. My Sisters are the only real family I have. I have had to become tough and very fast."
This was such horseshit but it came in a natural register.
" I fell in with the rough crowd when I got in the school, I became the bully to fit in. I hide the fact that all I want to do is play piano and write music. Marcus and I used to be friends but when I grew out of the bully boy shit he didn't and he wouldn't let me off either. He twisted and pushed me to become the person I don't want to be."
He managed to squeeze out a single fake tear. " So I cruise along, slowly allowing the real me to vanish. The day me and Adin had the run in was a bad one. I found out that morning that my Dad had taken to hitting my sister, she wrote me a letter asking for my help. There is nothing I can do, all that would happen is he would beat me up to. I was carrying that rage with me when Adin ran into us."
This story was perfect.. he tapped some ash onto the floor.
"I don't know what Adin told you but he knocked into me.. it may have been a accident but I got angry. He gave me some serious attitude back so the fight kicked off. It would have ended sooner but he started yelling at me, and throwing swings at me. It was all too much... I just saw my dad, drunk and beating me up no matter what I did. So I attacked him with years of built up rage. Its only sad Adin paid the price."
Lucy sat there listening to his story, she never would have known this about him and she would make sure she did not miss anything about it, she would nod her head at the right moments and then she gasped as he talked about his father being violent with him, she covered her mouth and was sad for him. She had a prefect life, a mom that loved her and a father that was there, but not so much when she was younger. She had a loving family behind her and listening to him, how could anyone really hate him if they knew what she knew now. She touched his cheek and then took his hand in hers, "I am so sorry, if anyone else knew this Brandon, they wouldn't treat you like they do. You are truly a good guy and everything you told me, I wish I could help you. You deserve a father that loves you and won't beat you up for the stupidest thing." She meant this, she felt so bad for him. She finally took a deep breath and wrapped her arms around him, "Sorry." She said as she gave him a small squeeze.
If Brandon had much of a conscience he might have felt bad about spinning this story, but he didn't so he didn't. His shoulders trembled like he was on the verge of tears and he pulled Lucy closer and buried his face in her hair.
"Please don't tell anyone about this, I don’t tell anyone"
She felt him hold her, she couldn't believe she hated him once, though something deep down told her not to trust him now. She couldn't think of any reason not to trust him though. She whispered softly and sweetly, "I wouldn't tell a soul about this Brandon." She pulled back a little, running her right hand over his cheek and then giving him a sweet smile.
Brandon took her hand and kissed it, his ability to fake crying was a surprise to him but he was sure that it would come in handy. Some of his crocodile tears ran onto her hand.
"You have no idea what it is like to have told someone, to not carry it by myself anymore. It was getting to be a burden I couldn't carry anymore."
Lucy smiled sweetly as he kissed her hand, she nodded her head, "I hate to think how long you have had to carry this burden." She looked into his eyes, she touched his cheek again, "I'm here for you Brandon, I promise. Anything you need. Though I just wish I wasn't so confused about things." She told him before saying anything else.
Brandon kissed her hand again and closed his eyes as she touched his face. " What are you confused about?"
"I fought with Molly the other and now thinking about it, I don't even know why. I have a crush on Chris and I might have a crush on Madi, but maybe it's only because I feel so alone and invisible. Trying to figure things out before I go on holiday with my dad." she paused. "Oh and my dad, god I am waiting to hear from him. I know he is going to go off the deep end." She shook her head and seat back on the couch.
"Well let me see if I can help you out there, if you are crushing on people to feel noticed then you need not waste your time. I notice you, I see you.. I like you a lot. If you are looking for someone I am standing right here. As for your dad? Well at the end of the day your dad loves you and chances are he wont beat you with a belt so it could be worse."
He offered a small mirthless chuckle at that.
Lucy bit her bottom lip and then smiled as he chuckled, she took a deep breath, "Oh I want to believe you, I'm just so confused." She looked down at her feet and then hand her hand though her hair, "Parts of me want to believe every word that you are telling me. That you do care about me." She paused, "Then there is another part that is telling me to run the other way." She glance over at him.
"Then believe this." With one finger he tilted her face up and kissed her with a passion. It was soft and tender but with a firmness that seemed to radiate intent. While he kissed her his fingers locked with hers.
Oh god Luce what did you get yourself into, she thought as he kissed with such passion. Her mind running through a shit load of different things, then letting herself enjoy his touch. She felt him lock his fingers with her, then something inside told her to trust him, to believe, though another part of her told her not to. She broke the kiss and looked at Brandon, "God.." She shook her head jumping off the couch, then looking at him.
Brandon slumped back into the sofa.. " Still cant trust me? I cant say I blame you.. Maybe one day you might."
"I can't do this Brandon, to go behind Adi back and be snuggling with you." She started to pace as she would glance at him time to time. "It wouldn't be fair to him, he would tell me that you are using me." She looked at him as she said this.
"Would he now? Well the only important question there is do you think I am using you?"
"I don't know what to think," she stopped walking and looked at him sitting there. "A part of me wants to believe you and then there is that part that thinks you are using me." She covered her face.
Brandon got to his feet, there was no point in over playing his hand here. " Well in that case there is nothing I can say or do to change your mind." He shrugged as if that notion hurt his feelings and upset him. With a sigh he went over to the piano that had manifested in the corner of the room and sat down. Without looking at her he began to play. It was a soft sad tune but it was played with an experts hand. " If you want to go then I wont stop you."
Lucy walked over to Brandon and sat down next to him, "I don't want to leave." She listen to him play and didn't want to leave him, she felt so much better when she was around him. She closed her eyes as he played, feeling the mood of the music, "Why so sad?" She asked opening her eyes to look at him.
For a while he didn't answer her and just continued playing, he was fantastic at the piano and in a way he was glad he didn't have to hide it anymore. " I am sad because that I have a reputation I am not going shift any time soon. What is the point of even trying to better myself? If people just think I am a certain person is there any point in not being that guy?"
He changed the song to a different tune and started humming along to it, throwing in the odd word.
Lucy listen to him and shook her head, "Well, you know what.." She looked at him and took a breath. "I'm a reason to change. I know you can be a better person, forget all those other people. I know you can be a better person." She touched the top of his hand.
He smiled slightly at her words but kept playing even with her hand over his. " It makes me so happy to hear that, I want to be a better person and you make me want to be a better person. I just don’t know what to do about the fact that you don't trust me. If there was something I could do you should tell me."
Right time to go nuclear. Brandon had learned a wealth of muggle songs over the years.. most were pretty good. His voice came out clear and pitch perfect, 8 years of voice training would do that.
"What have I got to do to make you love me
What have I got to do to make you care
What do I do when lightning strikes me
And I wake to find that you're not there
What do I do to make you want me
What have I got to do to be heard
What do I say when it's all over
And sorry seems to be the hardest word
It's sad, so sad
It's a sad, sad situation
And it's getting more and more absurd
It's sad, so sad
Why can't we talk it over
Oh it seems to me
That sorry seems to be the hardest word"
Luce made that aw face, god was he amazing when she was alone with him. She took a deep breath and slowly removed her hand from on top of his and she sighed, "Give me time to work through everything. Can you give me that?" She smiled watching him play and then hearing his voice. God, was he amazing in every way.
He considered her words before answering.. " Sure I can give you all the time you need. However can I ask you for something too?"
She took a deep breath before answering, then letting the breath out slowly, "Sure, it would only be fair." She smiled sweetly.
"Don't worry it's nothing big. Just from now on when you see me in the halls or with the Slytherins and I am acting like a dick and basically being guilty by association, please know that I am trying and that it's not me. If you could just give me the occasional smile to keep my morale up. You have no idea how inspiring your smile is to me.
Lucy turned away from him and smiled, "Oh please, my smile isn't that wonderful." She glanced at him before facing him again fully.
When she faced him again he traced the shape of her smile with his finger. " If only you knew the beauty contained in your smile, felix qui potuit rerum cognoscere causas. That means happy is he who can discover the causes of things... to earn one of your smiles will be the cause for my change."
Oh god, she thought as he touch her lips, she bit the right side of her bottom lip. "That was so beautiful." She looked into his eyes, she took a deep breath, "I promise you then I will give you a smile when I see you past me in the halls." She touched his hand.
"Then I will always will have something to look forward to" replied Brandon. In a fluid motion he turned his hand and took her hand in his.. " You are so beautiful.."
He gazed at her like she was the source of all goodness in the world. Slowly he brought his face closer to hers. He wasn’t going to kiss her again unless she started it.
She thought to herself, get a hold of yourself Luce. She looked into his eyes as he moved close to her again, giving him a smile, "Thank you. You are very handsome." She admit because it was the truth. She thought he was very handsome, but this was so going to the top of her confusion pile. She let her cheek touch his and then kissed his cheek.
That would do for today. He grinned as she kissed his cheek and he placed a kiss on her forehead in return before getting to his feet. "Right well I have to go back out into that world I pretend to live in, so lets do this again soon. It really is the most enjoyable few hours I have spent in a long time"
Lucy watched him and sighed as she knew it was getting late, she got to her feet and nodded her head. "I agree. I should head to my common room, before it gets any later." She took his hand one more time, "Thank you." She smiled and slowly dropped his hand, she waved him good as she walked out of the door and then everything hit her again. She needed to get some sleep, because right now her mind was everywhere.
Brandon gave her hand a squeeze before she left and then smiled and watched her go. Once she was gone his face dropped back into its normal apathetic cast. He had to go and find Marcus, he was going to laugh his ass off.
What: Trying to understand each other
Where: Dungeon and then the Room of Requirements
When: Backdated to Saturday Evening after she talks with James
Status:Complete
Lucy was upset after talking to James, she didn't want to head back to the Hufflepuff common room yet, she just wanted to run away. She was getting more confused about how she felt, crushing on Chris and wanting to know if she was crushing on Madi or if it was a phase. Adding Brandon on top of it all and then finding to ask Adin about that terrible day for him about what happened, there was so much going on in her head, she knew it was only time her father came to see her about the Mavens or even the fight with Molly. She never fought with her sister, but she was so lost lately, now losing Hugo to some monster, she didn't realize where she was until she wiped away some tears and seeing that she was down in the dungeons.
Brandon was whistling a tune to himself as he rounded a corner. It had been a good day so far and he had high hopes for the rest of it. The song he was writing was almost finished and he was more than a little proud of it. He had sent a draft to his sister and she had loved it too. He almost didn’t see Lucy at first but a wide grin caught him when she did fall into his gaze. Like flicking a switch he went into sensitive pussy mode. "Lucy, I'm so glad to see you!"
Lucy looked up and seen Brandon a head of her, something inside was thrilled to see Brandon, though she was still so unsure why. She walked up to him and pushed away the rest of her tears, "Is everything okay?" She asked trying so hard to get herself together which was sadly failing at this moment. She took a deep breath and then released it.
Brandon's smile slipped with dramatic flair. "Never mind what is going on with me what is wrong with you? You have been crying? What happened to you? Did someone hurt you?"
Brandon's face was a mask of feigned anger. "Is there anything I can do?"
Pushing away her tears, "No, I'm fine. It's just I'm upset about m little cousin Hugo. I'm fine really. No one has hurt me." She smiled and looked up into his eyes. "Well, between fighting without my sister and worried about if my father heard about the latest Mavens. I'm fine. I want to know if you're okay." She tried to smile for him.
"Yeah I heard about the rumors, I was horrified to hear it. Is there anything I can do at all?" Brandon had read the last Maven's post too. He fancied his chances with Lucy after reading it. With a kind look he opened out his arms in a friendly way. " I have a hug right here if it helps, it's free for this one time only special offer." Merlin, he felt sick talking like that.
Without thinking, she wrapped her arms around him, "I wish it was me that was taken. Hugo is so small and helpless." She rest her head on his chest, she couldn't help herself open to him no matter what other thoughts in her head were telling her. "I just want everything to be simple again. I hate feeling like I'm losing myself." She closed her eyes.
"Things are never simple, the only thing that you can do is find someone to help you shoulder the burden, and on that count I should point out that I have wide shoulders should you need them. I'm sure your brother will be fine, the ministry will handle it well. If you feel like you are losing it all just hold on to me to keep yourself in place"
He squeezed her tight and kissed her on her forehead.
She felt a little better since running into Brandon, "Thank you, though Hugo is just my little cousin, but I feel like he is my brother." She smiled and looked up at him after he kissed her forehead. "Now, tell me what is wrong." She smiled sweetly.
How the hell were you supposed to tell with these Weasleys, there was way to many of them. "Well compared to your problems they don't amount to nothing. It's my dad, he wrote me a letter to say that he has arranged for me to go meet the daughter of some friend of his. In short that means he is thinking about arranging a marriage, he did it for my eldest sister too. He is very archaic in his beliefs."
Brandon squeezed her a little closer, " I know how his mind works, he says its just a date but he will pressure me all the time. I hate feeling I’m having my life lived for me."
Lucy couldn't imagine her father doing anything like that to her, she felt so bad for him, pushing her feeling aside she wrapped her arms around him tighter, "That's not fair that your father would do that to his own children. I mean you should be able to love and marry who ever you want. Not be pushed into it." She glanced up looking into his eyes, how could she hate him, even though part of her because of Adin told her to. She bit her lip and sighed, "I wish there was something I could do for you."
Brandon thought he was doing well with this sensitive shit. He needed to use it now and then but it made him feel like a damn pussy. "He is all about the purity of blood and that non-sense. I will fight him on this but it is going to be tough." Smiling at her he brushed away a few strands of her hair, in the moments silence he leaned in to kiss her.. with a grimace he stopped short.
" I'm sorry, I had no right to assume, it’s just you are so beautiful I got caught up."
Feeling his lips on hers, she couldn't remember why she was upset, god was this even more confusing. "No, it's fine. I thought is was very sweet." She smiled and pulled away for a moment looking into his eyes, "Brandon, can I ask you something? Well, more talk to you about something." She bit her bottom lip looking up at him.
"Yeah sure go ahead", she hadn't gotten angry at him. This was actually going to be easy. Smoothing his features he took her hands in his. " Ask your questions"
"I talked to Adin, I didn't like what he told me. He told me about that night that you and Marcus beat him up before, but I told him I wanted to know anything he didn't tell me." She paused trying to get her thoughts together. "He told you that you did most of the beating, now I need to know your side of this. Adi is my best friend and I don't see why he would lie to me."
Fuck you Adin you homosexual piece of shit, keep your mouth shut or I will shut it for good. That was what he was thinking, he said something different. " Okay that is fair, but can we not talk about this here? Can we go to the room of requirement? We can actually sit in privacy and talk properly."
Lucy nodded her and walked with Brandon, "I am so sorry. I don't want you mad at me." She said as she walked with him and then finding the spot that the room was at. "Before I go in with you, you aren't going to do anything to hurt me, right?" She asked looking at Brandon.
Brandon took a few steps away from her. " I can't believe you would ask me that. Seriously I am not a fucking monster." Cursing loudly he kicked over a nearby chair. " Do you think I would hit any girl? Do you think I would do anything to you? The fact that you would ask me that makes me think you see me the same way everyone else does."
Turning his face away from here he brought his hands up to cover his eyes. Inside he was snickering but he looked like he was crying. Let her stew in some guilt for a while.
Lucy stepped back and looked at him, she took a deep breath trying to figure out something to say, she closed her eyes and looked at Brandon. Walking towards him and took his hands, "I don't think that of you. I am just confused because of what Adin told me about you." She looked into his eyes. "I am so sorry Brandon, I don't know what to believe. You are so sweet to me and then again look at the way to treat Adin." She bit her lip, I want to trust you so badly, let's go inside." She opened the door to the room of requirements pulling him with all her might to sit down with her. She turned to look at him and she had a nervous face, "Please tell me everything that happened."
Brandon pretended to put up a struggle as he allowed himself to be lead into the room. Once he was sitting he wiped an invisible tear from his eye. " There is nothing I could say to make the horrible things I did to Adin ok. There were a lot of factors but my own horrible anger is the worst thing."
A short searching through his pockets produced a box of cigarettes, he lit one and drew deep on it.
" You need to know that I have had an angry upbringing, my dad beats the living shit out of me every time I step out of line. My mum drinks all fucking day too. My Sisters are the only real family I have. I have had to become tough and very fast."
This was such horseshit but it came in a natural register.
" I fell in with the rough crowd when I got in the school, I became the bully to fit in. I hide the fact that all I want to do is play piano and write music. Marcus and I used to be friends but when I grew out of the bully boy shit he didn't and he wouldn't let me off either. He twisted and pushed me to become the person I don't want to be."
He managed to squeeze out a single fake tear. " So I cruise along, slowly allowing the real me to vanish. The day me and Adin had the run in was a bad one. I found out that morning that my Dad had taken to hitting my sister, she wrote me a letter asking for my help. There is nothing I can do, all that would happen is he would beat me up to. I was carrying that rage with me when Adin ran into us."
This story was perfect.. he tapped some ash onto the floor.
"I don't know what Adin told you but he knocked into me.. it may have been a accident but I got angry. He gave me some serious attitude back so the fight kicked off. It would have ended sooner but he started yelling at me, and throwing swings at me. It was all too much... I just saw my dad, drunk and beating me up no matter what I did. So I attacked him with years of built up rage. Its only sad Adin paid the price."
Lucy sat there listening to his story, she never would have known this about him and she would make sure she did not miss anything about it, she would nod her head at the right moments and then she gasped as he talked about his father being violent with him, she covered her mouth and was sad for him. She had a prefect life, a mom that loved her and a father that was there, but not so much when she was younger. She had a loving family behind her and listening to him, how could anyone really hate him if they knew what she knew now. She touched his cheek and then took his hand in hers, "I am so sorry, if anyone else knew this Brandon, they wouldn't treat you like they do. You are truly a good guy and everything you told me, I wish I could help you. You deserve a father that loves you and won't beat you up for the stupidest thing." She meant this, she felt so bad for him. She finally took a deep breath and wrapped her arms around him, "Sorry." She said as she gave him a small squeeze.
If Brandon had much of a conscience he might have felt bad about spinning this story, but he didn't so he didn't. His shoulders trembled like he was on the verge of tears and he pulled Lucy closer and buried his face in her hair.
"Please don't tell anyone about this, I don’t tell anyone"
She felt him hold her, she couldn't believe she hated him once, though something deep down told her not to trust him now. She couldn't think of any reason not to trust him though. She whispered softly and sweetly, "I wouldn't tell a soul about this Brandon." She pulled back a little, running her right hand over his cheek and then giving him a sweet smile.
Brandon took her hand and kissed it, his ability to fake crying was a surprise to him but he was sure that it would come in handy. Some of his crocodile tears ran onto her hand.
"You have no idea what it is like to have told someone, to not carry it by myself anymore. It was getting to be a burden I couldn't carry anymore."
Lucy smiled sweetly as he kissed her hand, she nodded her head, "I hate to think how long you have had to carry this burden." She looked into his eyes, she touched his cheek again, "I'm here for you Brandon, I promise. Anything you need. Though I just wish I wasn't so confused about things." She told him before saying anything else.
Brandon kissed her hand again and closed his eyes as she touched his face. " What are you confused about?"
"I fought with Molly the other and now thinking about it, I don't even know why. I have a crush on Chris and I might have a crush on Madi, but maybe it's only because I feel so alone and invisible. Trying to figure things out before I go on holiday with my dad." she paused. "Oh and my dad, god I am waiting to hear from him. I know he is going to go off the deep end." She shook her head and seat back on the couch.
"Well let me see if I can help you out there, if you are crushing on people to feel noticed then you need not waste your time. I notice you, I see you.. I like you a lot. If you are looking for someone I am standing right here. As for your dad? Well at the end of the day your dad loves you and chances are he wont beat you with a belt so it could be worse."
He offered a small mirthless chuckle at that.
Lucy bit her bottom lip and then smiled as he chuckled, she took a deep breath, "Oh I want to believe you, I'm just so confused." She looked down at her feet and then hand her hand though her hair, "Parts of me want to believe every word that you are telling me. That you do care about me." She paused, "Then there is another part that is telling me to run the other way." She glance over at him.
"Then believe this." With one finger he tilted her face up and kissed her with a passion. It was soft and tender but with a firmness that seemed to radiate intent. While he kissed her his fingers locked with hers.
Oh god Luce what did you get yourself into, she thought as he kissed with such passion. Her mind running through a shit load of different things, then letting herself enjoy his touch. She felt him lock his fingers with her, then something inside told her to trust him, to believe, though another part of her told her not to. She broke the kiss and looked at Brandon, "God.." She shook her head jumping off the couch, then looking at him.
Brandon slumped back into the sofa.. " Still cant trust me? I cant say I blame you.. Maybe one day you might."
"I can't do this Brandon, to go behind Adi back and be snuggling with you." She started to pace as she would glance at him time to time. "It wouldn't be fair to him, he would tell me that you are using me." She looked at him as she said this.
"Would he now? Well the only important question there is do you think I am using you?"
"I don't know what to think," she stopped walking and looked at him sitting there. "A part of me wants to believe you and then there is that part that thinks you are using me." She covered her face.
Brandon got to his feet, there was no point in over playing his hand here. " Well in that case there is nothing I can say or do to change your mind." He shrugged as if that notion hurt his feelings and upset him. With a sigh he went over to the piano that had manifested in the corner of the room and sat down. Without looking at her he began to play. It was a soft sad tune but it was played with an experts hand. " If you want to go then I wont stop you."
Lucy walked over to Brandon and sat down next to him, "I don't want to leave." She listen to him play and didn't want to leave him, she felt so much better when she was around him. She closed her eyes as he played, feeling the mood of the music, "Why so sad?" She asked opening her eyes to look at him.
For a while he didn't answer her and just continued playing, he was fantastic at the piano and in a way he was glad he didn't have to hide it anymore. " I am sad because that I have a reputation I am not going shift any time soon. What is the point of even trying to better myself? If people just think I am a certain person is there any point in not being that guy?"
He changed the song to a different tune and started humming along to it, throwing in the odd word.
Lucy listen to him and shook her head, "Well, you know what.." She looked at him and took a breath. "I'm a reason to change. I know you can be a better person, forget all those other people. I know you can be a better person." She touched the top of his hand.
He smiled slightly at her words but kept playing even with her hand over his. " It makes me so happy to hear that, I want to be a better person and you make me want to be a better person. I just don’t know what to do about the fact that you don't trust me. If there was something I could do you should tell me."
Right time to go nuclear. Brandon had learned a wealth of muggle songs over the years.. most were pretty good. His voice came out clear and pitch perfect, 8 years of voice training would do that.
"What have I got to do to make you love me
What have I got to do to make you care
What do I do when lightning strikes me
And I wake to find that you're not there
What do I do to make you want me
What have I got to do to be heard
What do I say when it's all over
And sorry seems to be the hardest word
It's sad, so sad
It's a sad, sad situation
And it's getting more and more absurd
It's sad, so sad
Why can't we talk it over
Oh it seems to me
That sorry seems to be the hardest word"
Luce made that aw face, god was he amazing when she was alone with him. She took a deep breath and slowly removed her hand from on top of his and she sighed, "Give me time to work through everything. Can you give me that?" She smiled watching him play and then hearing his voice. God, was he amazing in every way.
He considered her words before answering.. " Sure I can give you all the time you need. However can I ask you for something too?"
She took a deep breath before answering, then letting the breath out slowly, "Sure, it would only be fair." She smiled sweetly.
"Don't worry it's nothing big. Just from now on when you see me in the halls or with the Slytherins and I am acting like a dick and basically being guilty by association, please know that I am trying and that it's not me. If you could just give me the occasional smile to keep my morale up. You have no idea how inspiring your smile is to me.
Lucy turned away from him and smiled, "Oh please, my smile isn't that wonderful." She glanced at him before facing him again fully.
When she faced him again he traced the shape of her smile with his finger. " If only you knew the beauty contained in your smile, felix qui potuit rerum cognoscere causas. That means happy is he who can discover the causes of things... to earn one of your smiles will be the cause for my change."
Oh god, she thought as he touch her lips, she bit the right side of her bottom lip. "That was so beautiful." She looked into his eyes, she took a deep breath, "I promise you then I will give you a smile when I see you past me in the halls." She touched his hand.
"Then I will always will have something to look forward to" replied Brandon. In a fluid motion he turned his hand and took her hand in his.. " You are so beautiful.."
He gazed at her like she was the source of all goodness in the world. Slowly he brought his face closer to hers. He wasn’t going to kiss her again unless she started it.
She thought to herself, get a hold of yourself Luce. She looked into his eyes as he moved close to her again, giving him a smile, "Thank you. You are very handsome." She admit because it was the truth. She thought he was very handsome, but this was so going to the top of her confusion pile. She let her cheek touch his and then kissed his cheek.
That would do for today. He grinned as she kissed his cheek and he placed a kiss on her forehead in return before getting to his feet. "Right well I have to go back out into that world I pretend to live in, so lets do this again soon. It really is the most enjoyable few hours I have spent in a long time"
Lucy watched him and sighed as she knew it was getting late, she got to her feet and nodded her head. "I agree. I should head to my common room, before it gets any later." She took his hand one more time, "Thank you." She smiled and slowly dropped his hand, she waved him good as she walked out of the door and then everything hit her again. She needed to get some sleep, because right now her mind was everywhere.
Brandon gave her hand a squeeze before she left and then smiled and watched her go. Once she was gone his face dropped back into its normal apathetic cast. He had to go and find Marcus, he was going to laugh his ass off.