(no subject)
*delivered by owl, some words smudged*
Let me begin by saying how sorry I am. Sorry I haven't said anything, sorry I don't have enough of a spine to even try to say anything. I'm sorry, darling Benjy, I'm sorry.
I don't even know why we're moving. For all I know my parents don't know either. If Dumbledore HAS told my parents, they certainly haven't told me. Whatever the situation, they've accepted it and expect me to do so as well even when it's the last thing I want.
I thought of talking to you about it so many times, but I never came up with a single thing I could have said. I also thought of walking to your house, but that would have eventually led to the need to say things. I haven't been out of the house much at all. One of your guesses is right; I didn't want to tell you. I didn't want to tell anyone, really. Maybe that's my version of hiding under the covers and trying to convince myself it isn't happening.
I'll never stop being sorry for this whole thing. It was stupid of me to not say anything for this long. As for what's going to happen to us... Please don't see this as me trying to end it with you. Please. I don't want to be selfish and make you go through a long-distance relationship. All I can think is that's not fair to you.
This whole France thing isn't fair to either of us. I'm sorry.
((Seriously tho, the whole France thing is me signing off indefinitely. Emmeline will finish school at Beauxbatons and the Vance family will be the Order's eyes in France. Love you guys and all, but I've completely lost interest in online RPing. <3))