I have decided to spend the day playing my electric guitar. Maybe a bit of midi keyboarding too. I might even 'borrow' my brother's bass for a bit, basses are always a bit of fun
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Gotta say that I totally get teh neighbours thing. I like to do my thing (usually paint, sew or mixed medias) but I hate teh thought of someone judging me - even if they're supportive and positive - I can't get past the thought that they're comparing or critising. Once it's done though, I'm happy to accept compliments. And just for the offside, that goes for putting on makeup too! I 'know' they know what I look like, But I wnat to come out and go 'ta-da' and hear a compliment, not have someone watch and go 'that was interesting' I can't believe I compared music to makeup!! Blerg!
I would say that all forms of expression, music, painting, writing, fashion, is an outward portrayal of yourself to the world and so the whole judging thing (whether positive or negative) comes into play.
That's my biggest hurdle, as a neurotic social phobic, to try and deal with the criticisms (even the imaginary ones). Writing is the quietest and least visible form of expression and so I mainly stick to that. That's why I need to be drunk in order to proudly play my music out loud for all to hear (judge - in my mind).
DO you realsie I have no idea what it must to be liek to be a neurotic social phobic? I have been known to be too trusting, too believing (I guess I don't want to cahnge either) I am also slowly going batty becasue I'm not being as social as I love. I miss all the nights of friends hanging out, going out or bummign around....my problem is that I'm usually too slack to orgnaise everything (or too apathetic to raise the issue with my very own social phobic partner - whoever invented this opposites attract thing should have included some manuals on how to deal with it all!) But it doesn't matter (to me anyhows). I think you come off as pretty damn groovy...intriguing - I would like to hear/read more writing or music. *massive big hint:P*
I don't think being trusting and believing is a bad thing. Well, I guess I am still hopeful that the rest of the world can still hold up their end of the deal when it comes to trust etc. It would be a sad thing to think that someone is too trusting or believing, I think that would say more about the rest of the world than about them in a lot of ways
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I can't believe I compared music to makeup!! Blerg!
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That's my biggest hurdle, as a neurotic social phobic, to try and deal with the criticisms (even the imaginary ones). Writing is the quietest and least visible form of expression and so I mainly stick to that. That's why I need to be drunk in order to proudly play my music out loud for all to hear (judge - in my mind).
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But it doesn't matter (to me anyhows). I think you come off as pretty damn groovy...intriguing - I would like to hear/read more writing or music. *massive big hint:P*
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